An anxious nation awaits the update on whether Jeff has decided to keep shitting at work. Also: Getting fingered by your doctor; an update on the Columbine teacher who groomed a girl; another teacher had an orgy with boys wearing Ghostface masks; a man was sentenced for peeing into water bottles and spreading STDs; a woman is offended by Garfield themed 9/11 shirts; an OnlyFans girl killed a guy because she’s a dummy; Brian has a problem with protective film; gorilla ass; a Chinese man got his fist stuck in his girlfriend’s mouth; Hong Kong Phooey; and finally, sword fighting for a can of beans.

Brian talks about Aaron Sorkin, books, and Leonardo da Vinci for several minutes before remembering they’re trying to do a comedy podcast, then immediately blasts Ayn Rand’s shovel face. (Here’s a link to the Whittaker Chambers review of Atlas Shrugged Brian mentions.) Also: “Puttin’ on the Ritz”;”Rock Lobster”; all of a sudden, Jeff wants to shit at work; prostate exams; Brian tells the coconut joke AGAIN; old man balls; there’s a video of a girl sucking chunky peanut butter through a straw; being middle aged is brilliant; John Cena’s heel run; Adolf Hitler’s heel run; an Australian woman got caught trying to sell human toes; pretty soon, you’ll be able to finance your DoorDash order; the Daffy Duck and Porky Pig movie; check local listings, but McDonald’s wants $3.40 for a large fries; and finally, farting at work.

Brian about went on a homicidal rampage waiting at Culver’s. Also: You have to fight the impulse; Jeff had to shit at work and The Cos drops by to celebrate; Dave Gunn is alive; details on the South Carolina man who was shot by a firing squad; what would your last meal be?; 28 Days Later; Philip Seymour Hoffman; an embalmer cut off a dead man’s cock; Brian says you can fuck him when he’s dead; an Air India flight had to turn around because Indians don’t know how to use toilets; shitting in Jeff’s driveway; and finally, outhouse holes.

It’s complicated, but we open this week’s show with a correction from elsewhere in the show. Then: Docking; haunted pussy droppings; Brian demonstrates why he still listens to Bob and Tom; Brian takes a 1-0 lead in the Dead Pool; Kurt Cobain and R. Budd Dwyer; Jeff and the guy at work; Jeff found a podcast; Ashley St. Clair and Elon’s inexplicable 14th baby; the Netflix Challenger documentary; Peyton Manning in the Super Bowl; a man was arrested for trying to fuck a train seat; JD Vance; Brian will not die with sex toys in his house; South Carolina is about to execute a man by firing squad; Robert Byrd’s greatest hits; an illiterate girl graduated high school with honors and got into college; our insect overlords; James Taylor; fundraisers; John Cena and Shane Gillis; two old Asian women were arrested for running a jerk den; highs in the low 60s next week; and finally, the Cos makes a surprise appearance.

It’s all forced laughter and celebrities who should know better but have mortgages to pay, as the Boys watch an episode of the new “Hollywood Squares.”

Jeff’s dog is eating Trixie’s socks. Also, “Alice” and “The Love Boat”; it seems like a lot of panes are falling out of the sky lately; Brian hates flying; Elon Mush is the first deadbeat dad Republicans don’t hate; Elon’s vinegar strokes; movie reviews; Jeff found a Covid era cover of a Heart song; Dave Grohl and Arnold Schwarzenegger’s side pieces; a seal was wandering around the streets of New Haven; Kenny Rogers and John Denver; Kip Addotta; Jack the Ripper; LL Cool J; “Midnight in Chernobyl”; blankets and the casino; McDonald’s; Summer Teeth; The Cos returns; and finally, Dave Attell.

How do you expect this show to not talk about teacher and student sex stories when they’re starting to look like this (and this)? Jeff says it would be embarrassing to be assassinated by a retard; Brian thinks Trump is the price we paid for letting shit get out of hand; shamrock shakes; Jeff is outraged by everyone’s driving; a Summer Teeth update; September 5, Captain America, and the Led Zeppelin documentary; Brian is baffled by the MCU right now, and is scared of snow; acceptable Christmas songs; the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame nominees are out; a Chinese woman accidentally ate a firework; a woman stole a Krispy Kreme truck; a 104-year-old woman celebrated her birthday in jail; Trixie got hearing aids; an Only Fans girl was fucked off of a balcony and died; and finally, Jeff forgot we recorded shows in advance.

This week it’s some of the news we missed during the break, including: a New York City restaurant is selling grilled guinea pigs; the postal service is putting out a Betty White stamp; a judge sent a “My First Ankle Monitor” meme to another judge; two men died after searching for Sasquatch; if you had to be fucked by a mythical creature, who would you pick?; the reason Brian was late; a cop was watching porn while driving around; a woman wore a butt plug during a MRI; an elementary school principal had a party for hundreds of teenagers; “Esther Be the One”; a student catfished a middle school teacher into prison time; a Summer Teeth update; Jeff opens things with his teeth; coverage; Notre Dame; baseball; and finally, getting back into the groove.

The mammoth 20th year of TGO Radio begins now! As is tradition, we dedicate the first episode of the year to updates and corrections from the time off. This week: Nothing proves you’re old quite like your opinions on sports; twenty more years?; Jeff hurt himself bowling and Brian broke his leg; the 2025 Dead Pool; Jimmy Carter died; OJ Simpson’s porn collection will be auctioned; the Dodger fan who blew his fingers off is sharing a positive message; and finally, Jay Leno “fell.”

Next week begins TGO Radio’s mammoth 20th anniversary season, so this week we finish up with the last “worst of” 2024 episode, featuring: a mystery man (we assume) is peeing in candles at a dollar store, The “To Catch a Predator” house moves to Michigan and a tiny little man shows up; a man drops a load on a woman at Whole Foods; and lastly, a former NFL lineman pees on a woman during a flight.