The 100 Word Stories Podcast

The next topic is Arrested

TURA

Walking on eggshells; Scorpion

———

To test an aspiring ninja, the floor of a corridor is covered with eggshell halves glued in place, a live scorpion under each one. The candidate must traverse the corridor naked.

Some really can walk on the eggshells without breaking them. Some leap from wall to wall, never touching the floor. Some cling to the roof beams. And of course, some fail.

I trained for months running on hot gravel to harden my soles, then marched straight down the corridor, trampling eggshells and scorpions alike.

They grudgingly passed me, but next year, they replaced the scorpions by razor-sharp, poisoned caltrops.

LIZZIE

It was on the news. They had finally killed him. A candle was lit in a memorial of sorts by the people, just in case. The Scorpion wasn’t happy. When he blew out the candle, no one reacted. It was the wind, they thought. But when he kicked the memorial setup, everyone scattered. Respect, he thought, respect. He was THE Scorpion after all. The kicking seemed to work. So, he kicked a trashcan nearby but the damn thing hit him on the face. A few kids started laughing. The nerve. Being a ghost is such a difficult thing these days.

RICHARD

– Sting in the tail –

TOM

I’m waking on eggshells, don’t that feel fine.

Welcome to 2345 Walking on Eggshells Championship. The news in this year’s completion is the addition of Microsoft Scorpions. After the commissioner allowed electric alligators, it only seems sporting to include semi-venomous insects. Also of note is the craftsmanship of the eggs themselves have been turned over the Blue People’s Republic of China who breed the last surviving chicken. Despite high pitched warning at the Texas Chicken Ranch their clucker was kill crossing the road. Eyewitness state I appear he was trying to get to the other-side. Let’s turn it over to Durant Durant on the field of broken dreams.

LISA

A Robin’s Egg

SERENDIPIDY

I thought I’d give woodworking a try as a new hobby, so I bought myself a lathe and some tools.

NORVAL JOE

For hours, every time a patient was called back, Mrs. Withybottom stood, walked to the admission counter to glare at the nurse, turn and come back to her chair.

Linoliamanda patted her mother’s shoulder. “Don’t worry, Mother. There has to be some news soon.”

A doctor in green scrubs approached. “Mrs. Withybottom. I’m Dr. Netheregions, the attending physician. Your husband is in an induced coma as we try to reduce the pressure on his brain from bleeding. He has been moved to the ICU. You can see him now, but I’m sorry to say, children under 16 are not allowed.”

ROSE

Jason crawled to the kitchen to keep his back from scraping the ceiling. He knew he was too tall, and that it was unlikely he would find a place comfortable for him – too expensive. He picked up an egg, careful of the way it distorted when rotated as he cracked it over a thin frying pan.

The Y-axis compression reached 300%, but thankfully it stopped there. How and why the error had occurred was lost to time now. Jason only wished the safeguards keeping humans from shrinking applied to the environments. Or maybe that they weren’t there at all.

PLANET Z

Usually I trim my nails down every few days, but now and then I let them grow for a week or two.

I used to drink at a bar a lot.

I have one cat.

Elections are pretty much a game of bobbing for turds now, aren’t they?

Most new cars have an automatic parallel parking, but Doctor Odd added a parallel dimension parking feature to his car.

Looking at the tractors and other machinery, my grandfather said “They don’t make ’em like they used to.”

I work for a company that’s all about helping companies engage with their customers.

The next topic is PICK TWO Scorpion, Walking on eggshells, Turn, High pitched, News, Craftsmanship

RICHARD

— In the eye of the beholder —

SERENDIPIDY

How do I deal with it?

LISA

A Meeting of Minds

TOM

SomeThing

It wasn’t Billy wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed. As a child he had a fever that messed up his hearing. What he heard often seem by other as quite amusing. Take his belove Grandma. She would tell him to Mind his manners. Billy heard Mine his manners. Confusing how you could execute this, Billy did his best to compile. He had quite a deep hole in the backyard, before Grandma looked over the edge and declare that his manners were quite exemplary. Later in life Billy founded the Manners Mining Company who hold the mining right on Mars.

NORVAL JOE

The butler walked into the waiting room and seeing them sitting along the wall, approached. “Is there any word on Mr. Withybottom, madam?”

“No John,” she said wearily. “We don’t know how long it will take to get results. Why don’t you take Linoliamanda and head home.”

“Really Mother. I don’t mind waiting here with you,” Linoliamanda said with a sideways scowl at the butler. “If it gets late, I can walk to Billbert’s house, and his parents can take me home.”

Perkins looked unhappy but nodded. “As you wish, Madam. I will wait for your call at the manor.”

PLANET Z

They say that the last thing that goes through a bug’s mind when it hits the windshield is its ass.

They say that the grass is always greener on the other side.

We have an awesome back yard and patio, but the neighbor’s dog stares through the chain link fence.