The Adoption Files

Please join Dani Joy and I as we continue our conversation about spiritual trauma and adoption. We are using the book Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing by Hillary L McBride, PhD as a scaffold for our conversation. We just started Chapter 5!

How do the roles of victim, villain and rescuer play out in your life? What do they have to do with spiritual trauma? With adoption? Let us know what you think after you join us for the episode.

Dani Joy can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

She loves to hear from people!

https://hillarylmcbride.com/books/

https://mental-health-matters.org/2021/01/20/what-is-the-karpman-drama-triangle/

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions,

The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional

Thank you for listening!

Please join Dani Joy and me as we continue to discuss spiritual trauma and adoption. I am a Late Discovery, Intercountry adopted person. Dani is a mother of loss to adoption.

Dani can be found at https://medium.com/@danijoy

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/generational-trauma

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12220155/

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6378493/

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions

the host is not a lawyer, therapist, or an adoption professional

thank you for listening

Please join Dani Joy and I as we continue to explore spiritual trauma using the book Holy Hurt by Hillary L McBride Phd as a scaffold for our discussion. How might these spiritual wounds relate to Dani's experience as a mother of loss to adoption? How has my being an adopted person been shaped by spiritual trauma? In this installment we talk about the return to the familiar, even when the familiar hurts.

Dani Joy is a mother of loss to adoption, a homesteader and blogger. She can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20355967

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24881-cptsd-complex-ptsd

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions

The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional

Thank you for listening.

Please join Dani Joy and I as we discuss the section What we need from the beginning, from the book Holy Hurt by Hilary L McBride, PhD.

Dani is a mother of loss to adoption, as well as a homesteader, advocate and writer. Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions.

The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional

Thank you for listening!

California Alliance For Adoptee Rights and Senator Wahab have a bill being heard in the Health Committee this Tuesday, 23 June 2026. They need you to call the members of the Health Committee to ask that they vote yes on the bill as it is written, without amendments.

Please follow the link to find a script and the phone numbers of the members of the Health Committee.

https://www.facebook.com/CAadopteerights/posts/pfbid034DfNoKF8Kd3KM7c5jHPbu7XEAKBGkhFMbmLAH2GTVTzBQLcbjkZsFadKhyvMaBgSl

If for some reason the link does not work, please go to California Alliance for Adoptee Rights and click on the featured post at the top of the page.

Thank you so much for your support.

The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional.

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions.

Thank you for listening.

Please join me and Dani Joy as we continue our conversation about the intersection of spiritual trauma and adoption. We are talking trauma, just nonstop, processing! It's so fun. Come have fun with us! We are using the book Holy Hurt; Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing as a scaffold for our conversations.

Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

I can be found here, pretty much.

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions

The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional

Please consider rating and sharing the episode. Thank you!

Please join me and Dani Joy as we continue to address spiritual trauma from our lived experience as a mother of loss to adoption and as a late discovery adopted person.

Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that- their opinions

The host is not a lawyer, therapist, or an adoption professional.

Thank you for listening!

Please join me for my conversation with Jean Kelly Widner, a domestically adopted person who is the author of The Adoption Paradox: Putting Adoption in Perspective. Jean is a Baby Scoop Era adopted person from Washington who has found herself as an Accidental Tourist in the paradox that is living adopted.

https://adoptionparadox.com/

Mentioned in the episode:

https://boothcampus.salvationarmy.org/booth_campus/booth-records/

https://doh.wa.gov/licenses-permits-and-certificates/vital-records/adoptions/original-birth-certificate-adopted-person

https://adopteerightslaw.com/truth/

https://savingoursistersadoption.org/

https://thefamilypreservationproject.com/

https://www.relinquishedbook.com/

https://www.thegirlswhowentaway.com/

https://onadoption.net/

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, our opinions.

The host is not a therapist, a lawyer, or an adoption professional.

Thank you for listening!

Please join Dani Joy and I as we continue our conversation about spiritual trauma using the book Holy Hurt by Hilary L McBride PhD as a guide as we explore how this has impacted us as a mother of loss to adoption and as an adopted person.

Both Dani and I come from a Christian religious tradition, and we speak to our own lived experience as people deconstructing from religion and from the adoption narrative.

Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

Mentioned on the podcast:

https://candacecahill.com/book/

https://www.youtube.com/@maklelan

https://www.youtube.com/@dataoverdogma

If you are experiencing distress and need to talk, please reach out to one of the trained responders or to someone you feel safe with: https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions.

The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional

Thank you for listening! Please rate and review the show. We appreciate you.

Please join me and mom Dani Joy as we wrap up chapter 3 in our discussion of spiritual trauma using the book Holy Hurt by Hilary L McBride PhD as a guide. In this episode we talk about how leaving can end up being more of the same, and why that happens. We also talk about characteristics of marginalized groups that intersect with our experiences with adoption.

Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoy

https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/

https://thebloggess.com/

https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-health

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions

The host is not a therapist, a lawyer or an adoption professional

Thank you for listening!