Even though it was a shortened week due to the holiday, we've been here, present and fully available. I mean, I was drunk last night for my birthday and these notes will be somewhat logical so we could only expect the best from the studio crew, right? Today's Daily Discussion Topic was spearheaded by a woman who has a sleep issue (which sounds like us as in, we don't get enough.) Kelly Knipes, a 42 year old woman suffers from parasomnia, which causes her to do things like shop in her sleep, give scammers her financial details and take extra meds (are we sure this isn't Angi?) In fact, this disorder has caused her to spend $3,800 buying a full sized basketball court, cans of paint, playground equipment and hundreds of Haribo candies. While everyone else finds it funny, this is clearly an issue. Well, in Angi's case, this is an exploit as she is going to now start blaming things she spends money on that Jay the Straight gets mad about on this disorder. Still, this was something Angi didn't know about and so it inspired her to ponder a question. What is something the roadies learned embarrassingly late in life? Some examples pulled including things like someone thinking that roadside memorials were actually graves. A 27 year old thought "hump day" was the day people had sex and not the middle of the week. Another didn't realize a quart was a quarter of a gallon. A 53 year old didn't realize Rhode Island was not just an island. Another found out pumpkin spice doesn't taste like pumpkins. Another learned how to say Yosemite and always saying it "yo sem ite." In 10th grade, someone yelled out "I love necrophilia" after learning about necromancy. For the person who didn't know carrot cake was called that cause it had carrots in it, it definitely was not because it had carrot doodles on top. "POW MIA" is Prison of War Missing in Action and definitely not "powmia." Lastly, someone assumed fly fishing was done out of a plane or helicopter. To be fair, this does sound a bit amazing though. Right then, moving on to our own ding dongs. Marris wanted a birthday suit when he was a kid because he thought it was an actual birthday outfit and not swinging dong. Though he is willing to wear his birthday suit for us in studio on his birthday, it falls on a weekend this year (boo!) Marris also once almost killed an allergic friend because he did not know bell peppers were used to make paprika. Mind you, Angi just learned that in that moment so there you go. Speaking of Angi ... I just, this one was special. She didn't realize the last four digits of a Social Security number was your birth order and that it varied by state. This is why she and Jay the Straight have the same last four birth digits (crazy) and then she went and just said them out loud on air.... She also did not realize that hippos were extremely violent until like two weeks ago. Great, now that we're a bit smarter (not really,) let's go to the Request Line and the roadie add-ins. Thomas' always goes to the wrong side of a gas station whenever in a new vehicle and took forever to realize the arrow on the dash pointed to the correct pump side. Kevin didn't realize that every gas station has a green handle for diesel aside from BP which almost led to a costly mistake. Raquel was on a date and trying to be fancy and so she ordered a "virgin" Arnold Palmer. Elizabeth took forever to know that driving with the interior light on is not illegal. Larry has called in to win tickets to things without realizing there was a topic to discuss or a game to play to actually get them aka selective hearing. David knew someone who died from going "cold turkey" and assumed it meant they died from eating cold turkey. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Onward from one trauma to the next when Tiktok (I should have figured) has brought back an old sinister theory about the movie Finding Nemo. This perception shifter wrecked Angi's childhood (she was like 60 when that movie came out so let's play make believe.) Apparently, the barracuda that was blamed for the loss of Nemo's mother and all his siblings was not the cause of the mass extinction event. It turns out that Mrs. Vorhees was the kille...wait, wrong movie. Nemo's mother was the culprit because in actual life, female clownfish tend to eat their eggs and barracudas do not. So the death that swept the ocean that day was triggered by mother clown fish (who then went on to get eaten or something, this part was unclear.) The point is that Nemo only lived due to sheer luck or maybe because she was too full. Had she lived though, there is a good chance she would have probably eaten Nemo as well. While Angi's therapist put her calls to voicemail, she continued on how Coral was just an absolute bitch. See, marine biologists showcased that female clown fish eat their young while the males tend to them. Though the males will eat damaged eggs/kids and during the first few attempts, the parents will end up eating all the eggs for fun. This underwater horror story also has an even darker tone in that Nemo may have not actually existed. See, another swing showcased that Nemo may have been eaten and simply never existed and the whole movie is a hallucinated fever dream. After all, Nemo translates to "nobody." That's right, you were actually watching Finding Nobody! Basically, Tiktok is out to ruin your childhood by showcasing the true horrors of nature and these reveals were blowing Marris' mind. Then again, all the Disney movies were kind of sinister. Bambi, The Lion King, Dumbo, dead parents about with built in childhood traumas. It's almost like Disney writers were all high on acid or shroomed out and decided to really screw us up (and then benefit later by making PTSD-addled adults love their parks.) Obviously, Pixar won't confirm this wild theory but Marris is now in the mood to rewatch the movie and do a deep dive to see if it tracks or not. This led into a childhood trauma movie look through like how The Land Before Time made Marris cry and how Charlotte's Web did Angi in. Mother of the Year Taylor then forgot (see: drunk) that Charlotte's Web was so bad and showed it to her four year old daughter and it was the first time she cried from a movie. After announcing she's the worst parent ever (spot on) Angi also mentioned how the flying monkey's and The Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz terrified her so you can see how well adjusted we are on this show.

Oh Tuesday, you seemed so far away five days ago when we had to take an impromptu early holiday weekend extended break due to covid (more on that in a bit.) However, since Tuesday this week is our Monday, it only makes sense that we discussed people being more negative the older they get this morning. Marris completely understands it as people tend to get angry over adulting which makes sense as I'm so mad about being an adult. As for when you should expect the rage to take over, it apparently starts at 42 (which means Marris is ahead of the curve.) According to those polled though, 26% said they remained positive as they aged and 5% found themselves getting more negative. Using advanced mathematics or something, they landed on the age of 42 being the trigger for the decline into being mad bro. Marris' viewpoint was that at 42 and everything after, you have to be more responsible and plan for the future, which is awful. Factor in the price of gas, concert tickets and groceries being so expensive and you have your cocktail recipe for big mad. You hit 40 and even though it is a milestone, you need to sit down and start considering retirement down the line and how to survive that. In other words, life sucks and you realize it at 42.

So normally on hump day, we begin our spiraling descent into the midweek madness you have seen time and again from this show. However, this morning was a bit different, almost ominous as Angi came into her designated studio spot to find two envelopes. Normally, we'd assume it was just her hush money payments or her cut from the pigeon kidnappings that were made to make sure her neighbors pigeons win the upcoming races. However, the black envelopes did not contain anything fun like cash or anthrax but instead had 2 menacing cards in them. The first envelope said "Adios Brochacho" which is weird because that is a total "Angi Taylor Statement." (Much like Angi Taylor Money, we attach her name to things to showcase importance and her owning them.) As for the inside, it was a card with a casket on it that said "Let Me Rest in Peace." That was it, no name, no indication who it was from, just that. The second envelope said "Til the End" on it and the card inside said "Life, although it only may be an accumulation of anguish, it is dear to me just like you." Obviously, the first thought was that iHeart has given up on pizza party firings and this was now how they intend to get rid of us. Marris chimed in that he'd rather receive a severance than a casket though caskets are expensive and he could probably sell it off for some cash. As everyone should know, Angi is always in full time panic mode and she pointed out that if her husband or boss even texts her "call me," she goes into meltdown mode. In her head, she goes off the tracks and assumes that she is going to be fired, that Floptopia has collapsed on itself or that her husband has finally had enough and he's checking out. Needless to say, things like this freak her out so to have this happen this morning was not ideal. She's not sure who left the cards and if the situation is bait that they set up so she would discuss it on air but she is not amused. The problem of course is that the studio is shared with a ton of people but since her spot is centered away from others, this was a direct message from her and not an accidental left behind Uncrustable that she ate that one time. As of writing this, we did not know what it meant and she is clearly not okay with not knowing what it is all about. Angi decided that an investigation is going to occur and I'm assuming that we are about to become the Scooby Doo gang (Marris: Fred, Angi: Daphne, Prison Tattoo: Shaggy, HP: Velma, Myself: Scooby Doo.) So look forward to the coming days to see if we can figure this out or if Angi ends up worrying so much that she has a stroke.

Though the recurring theme today was cheating, it was also cheating that brought us (and by us I mean Angi and our own collective amusement,) into the wonderful (see: nerd, loser, dork) world of LARPing. After talking to roadie Paul, who dressed up like a male fairy (fairy is a non binary word,) to appease the woman he was cheating on his ex wife with. As you probably should have guessed/expected/known, Angi was completely enthralled with LARPing after that and she went about attempting to learn all she could about it. Now, this is a pulled together piece of ideas because I could discuss Angi watching LARPing porn with Marris but again, that was to be expected. Upon understanding what LARPing is and avoiding an aneurysm, Angi decided that she may want to LARP. Her first idea was Jake from State Farm but she switched it up to the more proper Ann Boleyn. Now, she was unsure if she had sword skills but she did ride her horse like a whore (with her thighs, none of that side saddle nonsense,) and so shoe/fits, etc. As I said above, Angi went on Pornhub during commercial and song breaks and also played us a snippet of an orgy on air (minus the fun sex) but I am proud to say the roadies did offer her costume ideas on the Request Line. She was told to do Game of Thrones, Fembot, Vikings character Lagertha the ShieldMaiden, The Devil and April O'Neil. That last was dismissed only because she would ruin the fantasy for Marris. We capped our LARP adventure (in this section, it continued to seep into the show,) which Angi learning that LARPing meetups may not have a lot of hot guys but if she drinks enough mead, she could get them up a notch. Unfortunately, she spent most of her life doing that so I don't think it will work.

Oh man, we are so back. The sun is shining, the cicadas are not deafening us yet and we did a daily discussion topic about stealing, we did not miss a beat being on vacation. This, of course, was brought on by something Angi did in London but we opened by asking if the roadies had ever stolen from a hotel or restaurant. For example, a 60 year old rich woman known by Angi stole a silver butter tray once. Apparently, the rich are the most prone to stealing because they're used to taking everything from the poor as is but also because they have to have a way to find fun when they have everything. The thing is, people love junk and will fight other things like Rock 95.5 keychains and shirts because it's there for the taking. The same could be said of those big juicy pens, which is essentially how this technically started and then we had the Angi tack on. Of people polled, more than half said it is fine to take a branded pen from a hotel. It should be considered complementary marketing since it's branded and you clearly wanted it enough to steal it and show it off. Weirdly enough, on the flip side, only 8% of people think it is okay to steal a pen from a restaurant, say the one left with the bill. If you were curious for more of a breakdown, Midwestern Gen X women steal from restaurants and Gen Z men take from hotels. Tying this back around to our resident show klepto (remember when she stole money from Dairy Queen to buy wine coolers at 16?,) Angi was at breakfast in her hotel in London when something caught her eye. She saw these mini jars of British jam and marmalade and she wanted so badly to shove them in her purse. As she did unload the entire haul in there, Jay the Straight freaked out and called her a thief. Before he could jump out of his chair and ask for the cops to take her away, she was shamed into not stealing the jars. As for Marris, when he was at bad AirBNB's, Marris would take something like a pillow or the liquor that was left out. Angi was stunned on several fronts, first that Marris would "rob someone's home," then that people left liquor out for guests to drink. I'm assuming all her next trips will be AirBNB's now. Marris explained that he would pretend that they drank the liquor while there and just take it all home with them. Now it's been ages since I stayed at a hotel so I can't comment on that but I think all of us had a klepto phase when we were younger, stealing was always such a rush. Before implicating ourselves in anything further, let's just get to the Request Line roadies. Sara stole a robe and slippers from a hotel before it was customary to be charged for taking them. It was in Hawaii as well so you know it was fancy. Sam was so excited to talk about stealing pillows that she swore and had to be given the boot. Austin will bring home the bath towels from hotels. Stephanie steals sauces from Chipotle. Katie steals k cups from hotels and Angi was in 100% in assuming they just belonged to you. Leanne stole towels from The Stanley Hotel, made famous in the movie The Shining. Rad Dad takes condiments from restaurants and shampoos and lotions from hotels and gives those to the homeless. Oddly, Angi again said that those are clearly meant for the guests to take. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Well we've reached hump day once more and Angi has yet to complain about something going wrong with her body which I think is bordering on a world record and I for one am sho... (reads rest of note...oh godd....) Right, you know the drill by now, crank up the Sarah McLachlan, light one of those prayer candles and strap in because this one is an absolute doozy. So Angi started this dip into the calm cooling waters of insanity by asking if anyone knows how to get on the dark web. Obviously, we all pretty much expected to hear that she was finally looking for a hitman to get rid of Jay the Straight for (insert her reason for being mad/crazy) but no, her needs were even great. Normally, I save my sigh/dramatic pause/disgust for my call but it should be noted I'm doing it as I type these notes. Angi wants to go on the dark web so she can buy body parts. Well actually, stuff found in body parts or for the sake of not dragging out a tease, the woman is desperately seeking cartilage. Apparently, her joints are cracking so much, you would think there is a karate class occurring any time she enters the room. She needs someone to grease the 5th wheel as she is now a combination of Iron Man, the Iron Curtain and the Iron Lady. This Miami Sound Machine meets Nine Inch Nails on a broken keyboard sound invasion began occurring when Angi started doing daily yoga. Though she doesn't want to stop because her body is old and needs to move, everything is rubbing harder and it's essentially bone on bone. While pondering if they sold cartilage like they do box wine at Liquor Barn, Marris mentioned that it can be regrown using cells. Angi just assumed it was regrown on a farm (and I assumed maybe iHeart won't let her come back from her London trip.) After that, the most educated (see: stupid) show in the morning did a Google search to figure out how many joints our bodies have so Angi could complain with a specific number. Angi is most upset about the fact that she used to be nimble and bendy (in 1938) and now every time she bends over, it sounds like the 4th of July. Apparently these joints all go at once (what a waste of a show) from her neck to her pinky toe. So not only is her brain broken but now the rest of her is as well (big sad.) Also in her dark web shopping cart is a new liver and since she was feeling generous, she offered to buy Marris some new kneecaps. I think this is where we should add that Angi and Marris took a trip to QC Kinetix this week and while there, she didn't even bother to ask why her body sounds like someone walking across an old wooden floor whenever she bends over. She was apparently embarrassed by her ailment that she's complaining about on the radio because they were busy helping real people with real problems. However, if she does end up finding the cartilage dealer on the dark web or off Craigslist, she needs to do her hips first, then her back and lastly her neck. Perhaps she can have a London or Paris surgeon investigate the issue while she is there if she isn't arrested before Friday for Googling "how do I get on the dark web to buy stuff?" over and over.

Boy, today was a real whirlwind of a show with both Angi and Marris taking turns showcasing their unique skills. While I'll get to Angi's in a moment as it involved the Daily Discussion Topic and she went into full "mama bear" mode, Marris on the other hand showcased his manliness (see: rugged stupidity?) during a discussion about a viral topic ironically also involving a bear. After pondering if Marris could build a fire (he can't,) Angi introduced us to a currently viral question that seems to have a very easy answer. If you're a woman and you're stuck in the woods, would you rather it be with a man or a bear? Before we start dissecting the answer to this simple question, we looked at Marris' survival skill set. Apparently, he thinks he can survive for two weeks in the woods and even though he can not make fire, he would drink the non purified water he finds and just wing it. He has seen plenty of outdoor shows so he's pretty certain he can live off the land (I need someone to greenlight a show with him being dropped in a forest yesterday.) Anyway, rounding back to the question of would a woman rather be in the woods with a man or a bear, the resounding answer was the bear. When 8 women were polled on the street (I'm assuming this is how the question began and then went viral,) 7 said they would pick the bear. Obviously, this choice is very telling about the nature of men and how women view them. Even Marris thought the topic was kind of funny and jokey initially but when considering it, understood that it really wasn't. Some people feel that there is perhaps a lack of honesty in some of this but the reality is this is firmly a discussion about how women feel about men. A bear's natural instinct is to kill and eat you but a man is a more dangerous predator because there is a good chance he would assault you (and then maybe kill and possibly eat you.) Marris understands the notion of how men behave dangerously and was once a bodyguard to a team of women in one of his 87 other jobs (I should add "bodyguard" because even though he was boss, he felt protective of them.) They even had code words and hand signals in case issues arose which all things considered, is truly a wild way to have to live. Angi was complimentary of Marris protecting women as we all should be because it's not hard to be a good guy, ego just chooses to overlook that. To add another to the "I'd rather have a bear list," HP said she wants the bear as well because she has bear mace. While Marris questioned why HP carries bear mace, Angi went back to my earlier point on how a bear would just eat you. Marris added though that isn't fully the case as most bears are afraid of you outside of polar bears. If you happen to run into a polar bear in the wild, you're pretty much done. As we started to put this topic to bed, Angi added she too would choose to have the bear in the woods but also pondered why dudes are wandering around in the woods in the first place. Perhaps Smokey the Bear could have answered these questions but he disowned us when we burned down most of the forest last year.

Ah Monday, we start the week with a goal in mind, knowing that we will soon get a week off for Angi's big London trip and so we are going to hit you hard and fast all week so you'll be thinking about us while we're away. With that in mind, we came hot out the gate with a Daily Discussion Topic focusing on dealing with pain in the ass people. This topic was spawned from a hair stylist, who took to social media to offer up some complaints about things that frustrate and annoy them (the hair stylist community as a whole I'm assuming.) Being Late - be polite if this happens and apologize, there are other customers on the docket as well so don't just walk in and sit down like nothing happened. Trust the Expert - Tell them what you want but don't try to hairsplain them, they know what they're doing. Lice - for the love of all things, don't show up with lice in your hair. Marris, of course, was disgusted in hearing things but that's the underbelly of choppin mops. Don't Be Gross in the Chair - don't pick your nose, etc. Don't Invade Their Privacy - just because you treat the stylist like your bartender and spill your secrets doesn't mean you should be prying into their business. Wash Your Hair - don't go in with hair that hasn't been washed in weeks or is covered in gym sweat. Don't Try to Lend a Hand While Shampooing - Marris was confused why people would do this in the first place but as we've seen time and again, people are nuts. So, with that all firmly planted, the question was what bugs you the most about customers where you work? For us, the roadies are technically our customers and Angi had a few thoughts. Certain roadies will call daily asking if they won but not specificing what they assumed they won. If you win tickets, know that they are not delivered immediately and usually show up close to the actual show. Marris further elaborated that once your email is collected, things need to be processed and this isn't an instant gratification thing. Angi added that she feels bad for people who work at an airport gate or the ticket country. However, you have to keep in mind it is not their fault your flight is late because the wing fell off of your (mumble) plane when it took off. With this covered, we moved on to the Request Line to collect more complaints. Laura is a server, she would like some pleasantries and not food orders shouted at her when she is in eye range. Diana is a teacher and really entitled parents who act like their child is the only one in the class that matters and it really irks her. Head Roadie Ferrari said driving for a ride share and having the added bonus of asking for adjustments, shoving in an extra passenger, being asked to stop places and then leaving no tip is just awful. Danny works in a garden center and wants people buying plants to know that he is working and doesn't have time for their life story. Sam teaches PE and said that kids with behavioral issues are made a point of for a reason and your child is not being picked on. Also, those same kids need to learn about deodorant and showering after a gym class. Alex is a vet tech who is astounded people ask to have things done for free or if a pet is brought in after an incident but a week has passed (someone ran over Fluffy, can you fix him a week later?) Alan is in the service industry and people with specific kitchen requests are irritating. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.