The Beak » Breakfast with the Beak

It’s a boat… but it’s also your house! And we can barely believe how awesome that is! We’re finding out just what it means to be a man of the sea, riding dolphins and staging illegal clown fights in international waters. So put on your captain’s boots, read up on maritime law, and join us […]

Ah, the eternal struggle: take a nap, or drink some more coffee? We don’t exactly come to a definitive answer, but we have all sorts of terrible advice for you. So don’t sleep until you’re actually tired, don’t trust the TV if you aren’t fully awake, and don’t let anyone tell you that Ron Popeil […]

Every so often, you discover something — a book, a song, a movie, whatever — that you love. And then you realize you could have gotten into it years earlier, but didn’t. And now we’ve done a whole episode on that phenomenon, because the election is over and we can go back to talking about […]

Election Day is right around the corner, so we’re devoting a whole show to what really matters: getting in a few last shots at Mitt Romney before it stops being funny. Plus, we’ve got a round-up of all the important issues of our time, from Chris Christie’s fleeces to lingering resentment over the Star Wars […]

Hey, remember back in episode 48, when we wondered how, just how anyone could reboot the Munsters? Well, it turns out NBC took our advice, or the advice of someone like us, and the end result didn’t suck. So… you know, watch us react to it. Look, it’s pretty funny, and it’s a rare chance […]

This week, we really earn that iTunes “Explicit” rating. Why? Because we’re describing the horrors of the Inquisition in graphic detail. And it’s really horrifying, and not exactly the best source of comedy. So if you’ve ever wanted to see us visibly uncomfortable, you’re in luck. Also, I think we defamed a forgettable actor. Subscribe […]

Have we got a weird one for you this week! We might not know who killed Dr. Sex, but we know who wrote a book about it. Kind of. It’s a tangled web of Australian trade law, composite authors, old-time radio serials, and dangerous dames with secrets they’d kill for. Seriously, just look at all […]

Bacon! It’s not just a food, it’s a meme! But is it possible to still love salted and cured pork products when you’re sick of all the jokes? That’s what we’re going to find out. And while we’re on the subject, why not guard your house with a wild boar? Why not enjoy some jellied […]

What is the deal with No Turn On Red signs? Am I right? No, I’m not. Once you learn about this history of those signs, they actually make sense and we’re stuck filling time with a conversation about the value of faking a disability. Plus car wash prophets, life lessons from the other Dr. Dre, […]

When it comes to the end of the world, the Vikings win. While other cultures were content to just let their gods sit around doing nothing, the Norsemen brought them all back for one last world-destroying hurrah, and now every other religion (and TV show) wishes they could go out with that level of badassery. […]