The Bitterest Pill

I recently had a strange encounter at my local Ralphs grocery store.  An encounter that suddenly felt like an incident and almost became an altercation.  I don’t know if the cashier mistook me for a shoplifter or a serial killer or if he just hates handling “returns,” but after getting nowhere with the store or the seemingly helpful people at Kroger (the parent company), I give up and will never shop their again.  EVER.

It all boils down to this: What exactly does the cashier mean when he says, while you are simply trying to return a mop, “I know you.  I’ve played this game with you before?”

Before that I discuss the rather plump envelope I received from the IRS (and I don’t mean the defunct 80’s record label) and how they wanted about 50% of Y in back taxes.  Huh?  Yeah, that’s what I said.

This is a “Pill Refill,” a revisiting of my 2007 podcast, “We are all Fairport.”  This “Best Of” episode was requested by Mike Hamilton of The Disney Podcast Directory.  Thanks, Mike, for encouraging me to put this out again.

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From the original 2007 blog post:

Twenty-five years ago, I graduated from Fairport High School in Fairport, NY.

On June 26th of this year, a mere five days after graduating themselves, five young women died in a head on collision with a tractor trailer while traveling to a family cottage.

After all, we are all Fairport.

Despite what you are about to hear, the producers of The Bitterest Pill do not condone, nor to their guests condone, any of the following:  drug use, pornography, breaking and entering, firearms, discussing Hugh Jackman’s sexuality, making fun of poodle-toting transvestites, living with the officially insane, cooking eggs with a cappuccino steamer, or beating up people at ice cream parlors, no matter what they do to your car.

Ladies and gentleman, The Bitterest Pill welcomes: Cousin Ronny

Olga’s voice was recorded using WireTap Studio from Ambrosia Software.

Since Seth was just over, and since his book “drops” tomorrow on Cinco de Harwood, I thought I’d pass along to you the first three chapters of JACK WAKES UP, see if that moves the needle any…

I LOVE this book and think you will too.  Check it out.

Yesterday, I thought I woke up after having had a slight heart attack.  Luckily I had just slept funny.

Later, crime-noir author/podcaster SETH HARWOOD came over the watch the big game and hang out in Studio G.  Yes, Seth and Dan and Hudson live in the garage!

Jack Wakes Up is released on May 5th!

Help our friend Seth Harwood make the San Francisco Chronicle Best Sellers List by coming to one of his San Francisco readings or ordering a signed copy from a selected book seller.

We went on a “Mammal Search.”  In the rain.

I talk a bit about my latest trip to Costco, by way of The Diaper Genie.  Trust me, there is no actual genie inside The Diaper Genie.  Just big plastic poop-sausage.

I have always believed that running in flip-flops is a bad idea, especially on the sidewalk.  And, unfortunately, I was proven right.

It turns out I’m not being paranoid, I’m being “parent-noid.”  (Turns out I didn’t coin that phrase.  Darn!)

We took the kids to MoMA in New York City.  Well, we took Hudson to MoMA, Princess T and I had a date…

The “Free Month of Premium Pill” offer has been extended until Martin Luther King Jr. Day (Jan. 19th).  See the “Holiday Offer” (right) for details.

The kids and I went to Target to shop for Halloween decor, ate burgers, played with dry ice and realized that half time has passed.

We had snacks at the Starbucks inside the Target.  Better than having lunch at the McDonalds inside the Home Depot.

Today is the first day that both the kids are in school for a full day.  Wow.  Of course, I thought I’d spend much of my new free time running Hudson’s snack over to him just in the nick of time…

I’m still getting my neighbor’s computer situation straightened out.  I got the impression that the internet security company didn’t want me to call, but once I did, I was on the phone for two hours.  And, I think I got nowhere…

Check out Seth Harwood’s Jack Palms Crime at sethharwood.

Check out Foreign Body at foreignbody.tv