Transform conflict into a moment of deepening connection, intimacy, and trust with this phrase: “When this happens, I feel this.” It really is that simple. But somehow, we’re terrible at it.
In this episode of The Body Knows, we explore how felt-sense awareness — a core somatic practice — can shift the way we show up for conflict and conflict resolution.
We talk about why most of us default to blame or bottling it up… and how there’s another way that’s actually more honest, more connective, and more healing.
🎙️ We cover:
– How to speak from your body, not your analysis of what’s happening
– Why “I” statements aren’t enough without somatic awareness
– How to help someone empathize instead of defend
– Real examples of how to say hard things more skillfully
📌 Examples:
❌ You always shut down when things get hard.
✅ When I shared something vulnerable and you went quiet, I felt my body tense. My chest tightened, and I started to wonder if it was safe to keep sharing.
❌ You never initiate anything. I'm always the one doing the work.
✅ When I'm the one consistently reaching out or making plans, I start to feel tired and disappointed. I notice myself pulling back.
❌ You keep making promises and not falling through.
✅ when something you've committed to doesn't happen. I feel let down and wary. I want to trust your word, and I notice that's starting to wobble for me.
❌ You only reach out when you need something. I feel more like a lifeline than a friend.
✅ When it seems like you are mostly just reaching out when you need something, I feel sad. I miss the parts of our friendship that felt mutual and curious.
❌ You don't know how to lead. We're all drowning.
✅ When direction is unclear, I feel overwhelmed and scattered. I need clearer priorities so I can give my energy to the right tasks.
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OUR LINKS
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The Body Knows is where we — Ana Ally and Leona Waller — say the quiet parts out loud about healing, somatics, and why trying to “fix yourself” never really works.
We’re not selling five-step plans, and we’re definitely not pretending we have our s**t together.
We're coming back to the wild, wise truth that your body was never the problem.
It’s been the compass all along.
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→ Embodied truth, not performance
→ A little irreverence, a lot of nervous system wisdom
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