"I think I was looking for something to replace the adrenaline rush, the buzz you get, that feeling of really being alive. You get used to performing in front of thousands every week and when that’s gone then suddenly there’s a huge mental void which becomes almost impossible to fill. At least for me. I just sat at home or did what I wanted to do, go on holiday, whatever. It became a vicious circle for

me where there was more and more alcohol and I started trying this and that, and suddenly you’re in trouble."

Episode Seventy of the Blizzard Podcast looks back at Lars Sivertsen's interview with Claus Lundekvam, 'The Centre-back and the Kitchen Knife' from Issue Five, first published in June 2012.

In it, the former Southampton and Norway international details his struggle with drink and drugs upon his retirement from the game. Chasing the buzz of performing in front of thousands, and with ready access to booze and cocaine, his life spiralled out of control and he was on the verge of a one way trip to Rio to end his life.

At his worst, he was fighting off the police and ambulance service, and hunting in his garden for imaginary paparazzi with a large kitchen knife; unscrewing the light bulbs in his house because he thought they were cameras.

In a frank conversation, he goes into detail about his experiences as a Premier League player in the 90s and early part of the twenty-first century, and how he managed to regain his life after a visit to the Sporting Chance clinic.

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