Happy LUBEor Day You Patriotic SLUTS 💦💦💦😫 From the twisted mind of THOT TOPICS comes an all-new episode full of juicy, scrumptious goodness for ya nerve. EAT IT UP MAMA!

We're back to business for the first time in a while so we do a little bit of girly catchup. Are we doing more than flirting with sobriety at this point? Who's gonna make the first move? Us? Or that tasty tasty MOCKTAIL? We recap Nick's bachelor party and ponder what it means to be a party girl in heart, but not in liver...

Then, we move on to the subject on everyone's lips: FAT GAY EIGHT YEAR OLDS. Who's got em? Who wants em? Is it okay to call them disgusting and shameful pigs? We investigate the gay guy selfie trend that has sent Twitter into a little spazout.

Then, we issue a formal prognosis on the Katy Perry situation following her response to The Dr. Luke Question. What's REALLY going on behind the scenes at Katy Perry headquarters? What would she have to do to turn this ship around? MUCH is revealed-- including our breasts, of course.

Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo.

GET 20% OFF ANY PURCHASE OR 48% OFF ANY SUBSCRIPTION OF THEE ONLY PRODUCTIVITY SHOT APPROVED BY THOT TOPICS, MAGIC MIND! GO TO MAGICMIND.COM/THOTPOD20 AND USE THE CODE 'THOTPOD20' FOR YOUR XXXCLUSIVE DISCOUNT.