M was a double agent during the cold war, working on the side of the west. But when the Iron Curtain fell, he felt abandoned by the secret services he risked his life for.

M's story is told by Eleni Braat, associate professor of international history at Utrecht University and Ben de Jong, research fellow at Leiden University. They've been interviewing him in depth for their research on what happens to spies when their secret service days come to an end.

This episode of The Conversation Weekly was produced by Gemma Ware and Mend Mariwany. Sound design is by Eloise Stevens and our theme music is by Neeta Sarl. Full credits for this episode are available here.

Further reading:

• John Le Carré: authentic spy fiction that wrote the wrongs of post-war British intelligence
• How ordinary people are convinced to become spies
• Revealed: the panic that followed the defection of the Cambridge spies