The Complete Guide to Everything

From "animal style burgers" to burritos wrapped in quesadillas to unofficial McDonald's sandwiches with really disgusting names, we're talking about secret menu items this week. Ya know, for people who like to go into a fast food joint and order "off the menu."

Also, Tim explains the Gilmore Girls to Tom and we have a very special announcement regarding the Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems theme song!

2014 kinda stunk but it is our solemn duty to still recap it. This week we're talking all things 2014, along with bureaucracies, fingerprinting, North Korea and predictions for 2015, the year the hoverboard finally becomes a reality.

It's Christmastime, so this week we're doing an episode about noted horror novelist Stephen King. This guy does it all: writes books, has movies made based on his books, produces miniseries based on the same books successful movies have already been based on, and predicts the future in the books written by his pseudonym.

Also, Tom gets a weird contraption for his back and we solve a problem from a listener who expects us to figure out his whole life for him.

Mars. The Red Planet. We've all heard of it, but how many of us have actually been there? The answer may surprise you. The answer is none. None of us have actually been there. But that's not going to stop us from talking about Total Recall, Terraforming, One-Way Trips, Biodomes and everything else you need to know about if you want to go to Mars.

Also we solve a problem about a listener's friend who raps all the time.

This week we get in the holiday spirit and talk about Christmas trees. Tim helps Tom decide whether he should get a real tree that will make his dog sick and probably catch on fire, or a fake tree that will require him to empty out an entire room of his apartment for storage.

We also take a look at reviews of classic books written by dumb children and solve a "problem" someone has because they get too much free wine.

If you're doing your holiday shopping on Amazon this year, consider using tcgte.com/amazon. It's the same old Amazon, but your buddies Tim and Tom get a cut.

This week we're talking the fizzy stuff. Ya know, soda. All kinds of soda, but mostly just the mainstream stuff from Pepsi and Coke. Also this week we answer a listener problem concerning a boyfriend who might have a name fetish.

This week we talk about the recent controversies surrounding Uber, the car service run by bros. This somehow leads to heated conversation about the development of a real life Hoverboard.

We also bring back the popular segment "A Particular Type of A****** You Didn't Know Existed Until The New York Times Pointed Them Out To You" and solve a listener problem from a young married woman.

You can help us out by going to podsurvey.com/guide and taking a short, anonymous survey about your interests. If you do it, you'll be entered into an ongoing monthly raffle for a $100 Amazon gift card.

The toy-giving season is coming up, and this week we're talking about the mother of all toy stores: Toys R Us. We talk about how difficult it was to get there as a child, the horrible idea of letting kids "test" toys while making their wish lists, the logistics of buying a video game as a child and FAO Shwarz, the high end toy store recently bought by Toys R Us.

Also Tim has a foul smelling misadventure on the bus, Tom has some internet problems and we solve a problem about smoking cigarettes.

Hey, did you can support the show and get some cool rewards? Check it out at tcgte.com/pledge.

This week Tim just can’t stop talking about Florida, where he just got back from tour and where he did not go to Disney World. Also Tim’s body can’t process alcohol, there are now Cronuts at Dunkin Donuts, the return of a classic segment Mundane Bucket List and the guys solve a problem about what to do when adults want to be your friend.

You can help support TCGTE and get all kinds of cool rewards on Patreon at tcgte.com/pledge.

And Tom has a new book out! You can get it at tcgte.com/tom.

This week we talk about the polarizing pop star Taylor Swift in a manner befitting two men in their 30s who have a tenuous grasp on what young people enjoy. We trace her career from her roots in country music to her current role as Global Welcome Ambassador for New York City, a place she has lived for 6 months. Oh well. Haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate.

On this episode we also announce our Patreon campaign, which includes a new mini-podcast called Amazing Facts. If that sentence doesn't make any sense to you, check out tcgte.com/pledge for more info.

And Tom has a new book out! You can get it at tcgte.com/tom.