The Dad I Want To Be with Mike Forrester

Does it feel like you're constantly battling with self-doubt and struggling to build up your confidence? You may have been told to "just fake it till you make it" in order to appear more confident, but deep down, that only leaves you feeling more insecure and disconnected from your true self. The constant facade of confidence can be exhausting and disheartening, leaving you feeling unfulfilled and unsatisfied. As Freddie Bennet will share with us, there is a better way to build genuine confidence and self-acceptance that doesn't require you to pretend to be someone you're not.

Freddie's journey took him from feeling stressed and unfulfilled in a corporate role to now running ultramarathons and empowering others to unlock their potential. His personal experiences and mindset shift highlight the power of taking action today and embodying the change one desires. With a focus on helping people understand that it's never too late to become the person they were meant to be, Freddie's insights and adventures offer a unique perspective on building confidence and fulfillment through daily habits.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Transform your life and find fulfillment through daily habits.
• Overcome imposter syndrome to thrive in the corporate world.
• Embrace authenticity and discover your true purpose.
• Take responsibility for change and achieve self-acceptance.
• Build unshakable confidence with simple daily habits.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:09:27 - Embracing Positive "What Ifs"

00:16:34 - Life in the Corporate World

00:28:01 - Coping Mechanisms

00:37:29 - Facing Reality After Tragedy

00:40:30 - Choosing Self-Respect and Self-Discipline

00:43:36 - Embracing Radical Self-Acceptance

00:51:05 - Creating Confidence through Daily Habits

Connect with Freddie Bennett

Website

https://freddiembennett.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/freddie-bennett-7440b38/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/thefreddiebennett/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Tyler Wittkofsky's life today looks full in the best way…an entrepreneur running a nonprofit marketing agency and an indie publishing company, a podcast host and published author, and a guy who sold his house with his wife to travel the country full time in an RV. Getting here was anything but smooth. Tyler's parents divorced when he was five, and the years that followed were unstable and often frightening, with stretches where he and his dad had no place of their own. He grew up carrying an undiagnosed mental illness he didn't have language for yet, and by his late teens he was self-medicating with drugs and alcohol to keep the hardest memories buried. In this conversation with host Mike Forrester, he's honest about all of it, and about how his dad has since done the work to change and become the father Tyler needed.

The turning point came around 2015, on a night Tyler nearly didn't survive. He'd called his best friend Matt and then stopped answering the phone, until an unknown number pulled him back. It was Matt's dad, Mr. Tommy, who asked him one strange, perfect question: "Is your wrench broke?" If the wrench isn't broken, you keep turning. Tyler was still here, so he needed to keep turning. That call sent him into therapy and, finally, a diagnosis and real help. Healing didn't happen overnight, and he's candid that he lived with shame about his mental health for a long time. What began to turn that shame into purpose was writing, especially the novella Not Alone, the book his grandmother encouraged him to write. When readers started telling him they saw themselves in it, Tyler decided to give a voice to people who felt unheard, and mental health advocacy became the thread running through everything he creates.

At its core, this episode is about the people who carried Tyler through and still do. He talks about the grandfather who could always calm him with a simple "slow it down," the mom and stepdad who stayed steady through his worst moments, the brother who's still his best friend and daily phone call, and the friends, in-laws, and neurodiverse team he's built his life around now. The thing he keeps coming back to is that the right community just knows when you're off, and shows up before you have to ask. For any man who isn't there yet, Tyler gets practical: reaching out can start small, like sending someone an article and saying "thought of you," or simply admitting "I'm not doing good today." It starts with forgiving and accepting yourself, learning to tell the relationships that lift you up from the ones that drain you, and knowing that even loving people sometimes need a little distance. If you've been carrying it all alone, this one's a reminder that you were never meant to.

The things that once filled a man with shame, like a stutter or a chronic illness, can become the source of his greatest strength. My guest Lee Zuniss stuttered from about age six into his thirties. He dreaded school, never raised his hand, and believed his stutter meant he wasn't smart. At 13 he was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and started hiding again, slipping into school bathrooms to prick his finger. Only in recent years has he seen what those struggles gave him. His speech therapist taught him to take a breath before speaking. He was practicing mindfulness long before most people knew the word. Checking his blood sugar six to ten times a day taught him to notice what his body was telling him. Mike Forrester relates. He learned at 40 that he and two of his kids are dyslexic, and reading aloud in class once terrified him.

For years, fear kept Lee in the harbor. He worked in his family's business and felt safe, but he had no sense of purpose. He loved acting and discovered he never stuttered when he'd memorized his lines. Even so, the anxiety nearly made it not worth it. He went on stage anyway, step after step, because he didn't want to reach the end of his life with regrets. Over about 20 years of walking into the fire, his confidence grew and the stutter faded. His ex-wife of 12 years served as a mirror. She showed him that other people weren't thinking what he feared they were thinking. Today he leans on a phrase a friend gave him. How can this get even better? It turns a good moment into an opening for more.

Lee's biggest lesson is to stop carrying it alone. When anxiety turned into a heavy, paralyzing depression, he chose a therapist who also has type 1 diabetes. He called trusted people who could listen without trying to fix him. Now, feeling alone with something is his signal to reach out. Mike Forrester teaches that a man should quit trying to fix himself by himself, and Lee lives it. After about 20 years in Brooklyn, he and his wife moved to the Colorado mountains. They share land there with her father and sister. He says nature calms his nervous system every day, and he now coaches men toward the same peace. If you're a father who still hides what shamed you as a kid, this conversation will help you stop carrying it alone.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Take a deep breath before you speak to ground yourself when nerves hit.
• Recognize how hiding a stutter, an illness, or a private struggle feeds shame.
• Ask "how can this get even better?" to open up more gratitude and possibility.
• Step toward the work and passions you love even when anxiety rises, so you don't live with regrets.
• Reach out to a therapist or a trusted friend the moment you feel alone with something heavy.
• See how a supportive wife can help you stop believing everyone sees you the way you see yourself.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:10:00 - growing up with a stutter and type 1 diabetes

00:12:00 - how shame makes you hide what you struggle with

00:14:00 - how breath work for stuttering built a lifelong mindfulness practice

00:16:00 - how managing blood sugar taught him to listen to his body

00:20:00 - asking how this can get even better

00:25:00 - how fear keeps you playing it safe as an adult

00:26:00 - why he never stuttered when acting

00:28:00 - living in the harbor when you were built for more

00:31:00 - how a supportive partner helps you let go of shame

00:36:00 - why you shouldn't stay alone with heavy feelings

00:38:00 - choosing a therapist who understands what you're going through

00:44:00 - living so you don't have regrets

Connect with Lee Zuniss

Website

https://www.leezunisscoaching.com

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/leezunisscoaching/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/leezunisscoaching/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/lee.zuniss

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Letting go of an old identity, like addict or convict, can be what finally breaks a cycle of shame and relapse. My guest Jonathan Field grew up without his dad around, so he made his older brother Jacob his hero. At 17 he dropped out of high school to follow the Grateful Dead's last tour with him. The brothers made a pact never to use needles. Jacob broke it, and just before he turned 21, he died of an overdose. Jonathan, almost 18, suddenly had to figure out who he was. A year later he inherited money and slid back into drugs while hiding it from his church friends. He lived a double life, hated himself, and says suicide was on the table. He later married, and his first son, named Jacob after his brother, opened a love he'd never felt. He still turned to meth whenever stress hit. When he confessed, his wife met him with judgment, so he started lying. The marriage ended.

Jonathan's first step out was simple and hard. He decided he would never fake it or lie again. He told new people right away that he was an addict, and he told trusted friends the truth, hoping someone had answers. He says hiding keeps a habit in the dark, where it's hard to break free. His turning point came through his faith, when he finally believed he was loved and accepted even at his worst. He stopped running and hiding in shame. Then he learned to separate himself from the old man, the addict and the failure, and to identify with who he truly is. In the first week of a short mentorship, he knew he was done with meth. He threw his cigarettes out the car window too. Mike Forrester teaches that who a man is stays separate from the labels and roles he's carried.

Once the meth was gone, life finally got normal. Jonathan remarried, had four more kids, started a business, bought a house, and led a men's group. Then he was charged with wire and mail fraud, a charge he still disputes. He lost at trial and was sentenced to five years in prison when his youngest son was three months old. He told his kids again and again that they'd miss each other and that the family would be back together. He refused to see himself as a victim and took ownership of how he had run his business. In prison he read books he never would have opened before, and he says his marriage is stronger because of it. He now chooses discomfort on purpose, because that's where growth happens. For the dad hiding a habit from his family and drowning in shame, Jonathan's story offers a way out of hiding.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize how hiding a habit from your wife and friends keeps you stuck and why honesty is the first step out.
• Separate who you are from old labels like addict, convict, or failure.
• Take ownership of how you got where you are without letting shame define you.
• Prepare your kids honestly for a hard season so they know the family will get through it.
• Choose discomfort on purpose, since that's where you grow.
• Keep moving forward after losing a business, a job, or even your freedom.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:06:47 - overcoming the loss of a brother and an identity crisis

00:15:24 - deciding to stop lying and living a double life

00:17:12 - struggling with meth addiction as a husband and dad

00:18:30 - why vulnerability is the first step to breaking an addiction

00:21:50 - discovering you're loved and accepted even at your worst

00:37:03 - going to prison and preparing your kids

00:47:51 - embracing change and growth through discomfort

00:49:33 - facing trials and adversity by taking ownership

Connect with Jonathan Field

Website

https://sonstonecoaching.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jonathan-field-49ab1a43/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/thejonathanfield/

YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJJvX8cHaDYF9Dz0i6LxP0w

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Growing past insecurity works a lot like leveling up a video game character, one small win at a time. My guest Dr. Agam Dhawan is a psychiatrist who uses gaming to help men understand depression and anxiety. He moved to the U.S. as a kid and was bullied for his name. As a five-foot-six, 130-pound teenager, he decided cool guys wouldn't want him as a friend and girls wouldn't want to date him. Every party he wasn't invited to felt like proof. When a classmate did invite him to one, he didn't go. When a girl wrote "prom?" with a heart in his planner, he pretended he never saw it and opened his math homework. He assumed it was a joke. Even after joining a fraternity in college, he felt like an imposter and skipped parties and tailgates for two years. The turning point came his senior year. He moved into the house, became scholarship chair, and stayed up talking with his brothers until 2 or 3 a.m. They had the same insecurities he did.

Agam's tools come straight from his work as a psychiatrist. He borrows from exposure therapy. A man afraid of heights starts by looking out from the first floor, then the second, then the third, long before the 50th. Growth works the same way, like adding 10 or 15 pounds to your bench press rather than 50. The load should feel uncomfortable without crushing you. When the imposter feeling shows up, Agam tells himself it's part of the process. For a man stuck in depression, he says you may be starting underground, so the steps get smaller. Mike and Agam map out what that can look like. Put on your gym shoes Monday, drive to the gym parking lot Tuesday, and watch a video on the bench press Wednesday. Each win feeds a positive feedback loop. Agam also urges men to find a mentor who's ahead of them. He lost years in the gym before a friend taught him that diet mattered.

Agam believes fitness is the first skill a man should build. It teaches delayed gratification, discipline, time management, and saying no to excuses. Social skills come next. Nobody gets far at work or at home without people supporting him. That means reading emotions and staying quiet so others feel safe. He says the most fulfilling thing he does is help guys who remind him of his younger self. Today he practices in New York City, does model photography on the side, and has a full social life. Mike Forrester shares that small steps were how he found his own way forward when he was depressed and withdrawn. He reminds men to aim for progress over perfection. Dads who've watched a son pull away from parties, sports, or girls will find a gentle playbook here. So will the man still carrying that kid inside himself.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Use small exposure steps, the first floor before the 50th, to face a fear without getting overwhelmed.
• Recognize how one bad experience after another hardens into a belief that you're not good enough.
• Tell yourself the imposter feeling is part of the process and keep going.
• Start with fitness to build the discipline and delayed gratification that carry into your career and money.
• Build social skills so your wife and kids feel safe and heard when they talk to you.
• Find a mentor or program that's ahead of you to cut years off your learning curve.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:07:29 - leveling up in life like a video game character

00:16:00 - overcoming the fear of rejection

00:19:02 - finding confidence by contributing to others

00:21:34 - overcoming the fear of being found out

00:39:03 - building self-confidence through positive feedback loops

00:44:18 - taking small steps when you're facing depression and anxiety

Connect with Dr. Agam Dhawan

Website

https://www.agamdhawanmd.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/agam-dhawan-md/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/agamdhawanmd/

YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/@LevelUpPsych

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Do you want to break free from the chains of uncertainty and self-doubt, to gain the confidence and clarity needed to pursue your personal goals? Are you tired of feeling stuck and uncertain about your abilities and potential? Adam Hill shares how we achieve unwavering self-belief and unwavering clarity in our lives. This week on the Living Fearless Today Podcast Adam shows us how we can unlock the door to unshakable confidence and crystal-clear direction, allowing you to chase after your dreams and aspirations fearlessly.

Adam found himself constantly worrying about everything. This worry translated into social anxiety and a fear of what others thought of him. However, it wasn't until he saw The Iron Man on television that a spark of inspiration ignited within him. Despite his alcoholism and fear overwhelming him, Adam felt a deep curiosity about what he could achieve. This curiosity planted a seed that would eventually lead him to conquer his fears and pursue his dreams. Through sobriety and finding a supportive community, Adam discovered the power of building relationships with people who have what he wants. He learned to embrace fear, viewing it as an opportunity for growth rather than a sign of danger. Today, Adam is a speaker, podcast host, and successful businessman, motivating others to push past their comfort zones and find hope beyond hopelessness. His story serves as a reminder that overcoming uncertainty and self-doubt is possible for anyone willing to embrace their fears and pursue their passions.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Embrace challenges and conquer your fears for personal growth and achievement.
• Unlock success by building relationships with accomplished individuals who can mentor and inspire you.
• Discover hope when all seems lost and find the strength to create a brighter future.
• Experience the transformative power of Alcoholics Anonymous and reclaim control of your life.
• Overcome uncertainty and self-doubt to pursue your personal goals and dreams confidently.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:04:06 - Overcoming Fear

00:06:14 - The Power of Male Relationships

00:16:51 - Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt

00:38:25 - From Sobriety to Triathlon

00:47:51 - Bringing Mindfulness and Curiosity to Daily Life

00:51:26 - Sustaining Growth and Progress

Connect with Adam Hill

Website

https://adamcliffordhill.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamchill

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/adam.hill.39982/

YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/@AdamCHill

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Breaking a generational cycle can start the day a boy decides he won't live in the misery he grew up in. My guest Jerry Dugan made that decision at 14. He was an Army kid, and his parents split when he was 11. He and his younger brother then spent months in Germany keeping their father safe through a mental health crisis. His dad's platoon sergeant finally stepped in and got the family help. The boys spent several weeks with a foster family while their father got care. Back in California, Jerry spent three years bullied by his own extended family. Today he's a husband, a dad of two grown kids, and the host of the Beyond the Rut podcast. In this conversation with Mike Forrester, he also talks about leaving his corporate job in October 2022. He left to build his own company.

Jerry's adult life shows what he built in place of that house. He saw that stress at work was taking the energy men want to give their wives and kids. His company, BtR Impact, teaches leaders to treat their teams one degree better. Good people stay, and leaders get to go home on time without guilt. Before he left his job, he sat down with his wife and mapped how far their savings could stretch. They looked at one month, three months, six months, and a full year, and chose six. Ten months in, paid speaking work is coming in and they're on the one year plan. His wife and daughter helped him narrow dozens of business ideas down to one. Three men he'd never met before each gave him the same advice and pointed him to the same book. He's also working with a fitness coach, has lost 10 pounds, and goes rucking with a friend.

The heart of this episode is a family Jerry lived with for only a few weeks. The O'Neill family ate their meals together. Their kids talked out their disagreements, and conflict ended in a timeout and a conversation. Jerry says it was the first time the answer to a problem wasn't more anger or more pain. At 14, he took the $20 he earned mowing a retiree's yard and bought Christmas cards. He wrote his vision for the family on each one and gave them to about 20 relatives. Half cheered him on, and half asked who he thought he was. Years later, his cousin Susie told him she kept that card through her darkest days. It helped her go back to school and become a certified nursing assistant. Mike Forrester teaches that what happened to you isn't your fault, but it is your responsibility. Jerry picked up that responsibility as a teenager. This one is for the man, and especially the dad with kids still at home, who grew up in a house full of anger or silence. It's for the dad who wants to give his kids the kind of home he only got to visit.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize how stress at work drains the energy you want to give your wife and kids at home.
• See how one healthy family showed an 11-year-old a calmer way to handle conflict.
• Name the kind of home you want your kids to grow up in and the patterns you refuse to pass on.
• Learn how Jerry and his wife mapped a savings plan together before he left his corporate job.
• Understand why sharing your vision for your family can help the people around you change too.
• Use small physical steps, like a fitness coach or a weekly walk with a friend, to rebuild your energy in your forties.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:04:05 - leaving corporate life to start a leadership business

00:05:10 - why work stress leaves men no energy for their families

00:12:14 - getting healthier in your forties with a fitness coach

00:14:53 - the end of life regrets that changed how he saw his career

00:18:09 - how three conversations with other men changed his direction

00:20:52 - how to plan a career change with your wife using your savings

00:26:01 - what happens to a boy when his parents divorce at 11

00:32:02 - growing up too fast while caring for a struggling parent

00:36:09 - how one caring adult helped a scared kid ask for help

00:38:00 - what a healthy family looked like to a boy from a hard home

00:46:42 - deciding at 14 to break the family pattern

00:51:10 - how sharing your vision can change someone else's life

Connect with Jerry Dugan

Website

https://beyondtherut.com/

LinkedIn

https://linkedin.com/in/jerrydugan

Facebook

https://facebook.com/beyondtherut

YouTube

https://YouTube.com/@beyondtherut

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Does this sound familiar? You've been told that working longer hours and sacrificing personal time is the only way to succeed in your career and find fulfillment. But deep down, you feel the pain of this draining and ineffective action. It's leaving you exhausted, stressed, and disconnected from the things that truly matter to you. Jerry Dugan shows that it's time to break free from this cycle and discover the keys to achieving work-life balance and personal fulfillment.

Jerry Dugan shares his journey toward achieving work-life balance and personal fulfillment in this episode. He recalls the pivotal moment when he realized the importance of prioritizing his personal pursuits and spending quality time with his family. Hearing the regrets of individuals on their deathbeds, wishing they had focused more on their loved ones and pursued their passions, deeply impacted Jerry. This realization led him to make significant changes in his life, including starting his own company, BTR Impact, which focuses on leadership development through servant leadership. Jerry's ultimate goal is to help individuals achieve a better work-life balance by creating a positive and engaging work environment. By doing so, he believes that people can find fulfillment not only in their professional lives but also in their personal pursuits. Through his own experiences and the lessons he has learned, Jerry inspires others to prioritize what truly matters and live a life that is both meaningful and fulfilling.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Discover how to transform workplace culture and create a positive environment.
• Uncover the power of servant leadership and its impact on organizations.
• Unlock the secrets to achieving work-life balance and personal fulfillment.
• Learn effective strategies for leadership development and fostering positive environments.
• Gain insights into overcoming personal challenges and developing resilience.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:08:02 - Challenges in the Workforce

00:22:00 - Clarity and Streamlining Focus

00:23:43 - The Power of Perspective and Trusted Guidance

00:29:59 - Parents' Separation

00:41:40 - The Impact of Mental Health on Family Dynamics

00:45:11 - A Turning Point and Discovering a Vision

Connect with Jerry Dugan

Website

https://beyondtherut.com/

LinkedIn

https://linkedin.com/in/jerrydugan

Facebook

https://facebook.com/beyondtherut

YouTube

https://YouTube.com/@beyondtherut

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Are you feeling lost or lacking purpose in your life? In this episode of the Living Fearless Today podcast, guest Greg Gerber shares his journey of finding purpose and fulfillment after retirement. Greg's story serves as a reminder that it is never too late to pursue passion and find purpose in life. He discusses the importance of intentional parenting, building solid relationships with children, and the impact it can have on their lives. Greg also dives into purpose and identity, emphasizing the need for a sense of purpose, especially after retirement. He provides practical advice on finding purpose at any age and highlights the importance of community and relationships in this process. Additionally, Greg opens up about his personal struggle with pornography addiction and the importance of seeking help and overcoming this destructive habit.

Greg is a passionate advocate for finding purpose and fulfillment in life, especially for those who have experienced significant life changes, such as retirement. With his platform, Forward From 50, Greg empowers individuals over 50 to live their lives with purpose and passion. As the author of two books, 'Restore Joy to Your Life' and 'Pornocide: Why Lust is Killing Your Faith, Stealing Your Joy, and Destroying Your Life', Greg shares valuable insights and practical advice on how to overcome obstacles and discover a renewed sense of purpose. Through his journey and the stories of others, Greg reminds us that finding purpose is not reserved for a select few but can be a transformative experience at any age or situation of life. Get ready as we delve into the insights that Greg brings to bear in helping us navigate the path toward a fulfilling and purposeful life.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Discover a renewed sense of purpose and fulfillment after retirement or a major life change.
• Strengthen your relationships and build deeper connections with those you love.
• Learn effective parenting strategies and improve communication with your children.
• Overcome the challenges of pornography addiction and regain control of your life.
• Understand the dangers of pornography and its impact on relationships and well-being.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:06:39 - Difficult Childhood

00:15:29 - Spending Quality Time with Children

00:18:18 - Making Time a Priority

00:20:11 - Overcoming Parenting Challenges

00:32:43 - Finding Passion and Purpose

00:39:59 - The Impact of Pornography Addiction

Connect with Greg Gerber

Website

http://www.forwardfrom50.com/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/greggerber99/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/greg.gerber.7

YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/@forwardfrom50

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Listening to understand, rather than waiting to talk, can change a man's career, his marriage, and his relationship with his kids. My guest Bruce Cardenas grew up one of five kids in Highbridge, New Jersey. He was a C and D student, and nobody in his family talked to him about college. When he told the local police chief he wanted to be a cop, the chief said he was too immature. He told Bruce to join the Marine Corps first. Bruce did, then moved to California and joined the LAPD. While he waited on his application, he held three jobs. He was the top salesman at a car dealership for eight months straight. He didn't know every spec, so he'd invite customers to go find out together. His first training officer drew him a face with big ears and no mouth. That lesson in listening followed Bruce through police work, his own executive protection business, and years at Quest Nutrition.

Bruce built a career on making himself useful. As a cop, he learned to treat people with dignity and talk them into jail rather than fight them. In executive protection, he lost clients when his hires refused small asks like walking a client's dog. At Quest, he wasn't qualified to work in nutrition, so he brought value with no expectations. Over one holiday break, he built out a studio nobody asked him to build. He flew to events about 40 weekends a year and was on the executive team when Quest sold. He calls it relationship capital. Make more deposits than withdrawals, and people want to help when you finally ask. Mike Forrester teaches that a man is more than the role on his business card. Bruce never let "that's not my job" define him.

Bruce is honest about what self-doubt cost him. After protecting a tech founder for two days, he never followed up, and he believes that silence cost him a lasting client. Once, his business had about $30,000 in the bank against a payroll of more than $60,000. He was too embarrassed to call anyone, so he cashed out his police pension. Today he asks for help freely and tells critics that what they think of him is none of his business. Watching very wealthy clients die by suicide or overdose taught him that money only helps move life along. He also has his two adult kids back after years apart. His son, a two-tour combat vet, lives on his property and works out with him. His daughter, a nurse, lives in his house. Fathers who feel too proud to ask for help, or who missed years with their kids, will hear themselves in Bruce.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Listen to understand what your wife, your kids, or a client is saying before you plan your reply.
• Bring value with no expectations and watch how relationships pay you back.
• Drop the "that's not my job" mindset that keeps you from growing at work.
• Recognize how self-doubt and worry about what others think stop you from following up on opportunities.
• Ask for help early when money gets tight, before embarrassment makes the problem bigger.
• See how adult kids can come back into your life, even after years apart.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:03:51 - getting your adult kids back after years apart

00:07:42 - when you're told you're too immature, and the detour that helps you grow

00:09:23 - becoming the top car salesman by building relationships

00:13:50 - why listening is a skill most men never learn

00:22:34 - why a servant mindset opens doors

00:23:24 - breaking out of the "that's not my job" mindset

00:29:15 - how quiet self-doubt costs you the things you want most

00:30:36 - why what people think of you is none of your business

00:33:24 - what watching wealthy men lose everything teaches about money

00:36:47 - what being too embarrassed to ask for help can cost

00:39:12 - why asking for help takes strength

Connect with Bruce Cardenas

Website

http://www.brucecardenas.com/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

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Instagram

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