The Emil Show - All Things Relational

How do affairs happen? What are the rules or boundaries for relationships to support trust and it's accompanying vulnerability to instill intimacy? 

This episode addresses two questions from listeners Kim and Kate about relationship boundaries. There are three risk criteria that make relationships with others vulnerable to developing more than just a friendship: Age range plus or minus 7-10 years. Gender orientation (Gay with Gay, Heterosexual with Heterosexual etc., and attraction.  If the "friend" you want is within your age range, attractive and has the same sexual orientation as you - that is a high risk friend. It doesn't mean you can't have that person as a friend but there are things you can do to reduce the likelihood of it developing into a romantic relationship and sabotaging the marriage you have.

Then after addressing these questions I go into how affairs start and how they develop. 

Sharing, leads to caring, caring leads to baring. Relationships either grow or die unless you put strategic limiters in place. 

And just for good measure, Secrecy vs privacy is addressed. 

You have relationship questions you want answered email me at [email protected]!

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How do I transition from work mode to husband father mode?

How do I cope with the sexual abuse my spouse experienced before getting married?

What one piece of advice would I give someone that could make all the difference in their marriage?

One of my biggest pet peeves in life is that we as a society pay a lot of lip-service to the importance of marriage but we don't do much in terms of preparing people for marriage and training them in marriage. It's easier to get a marriage license than it is to get a drivers license. I'm going to share some ways we can relate better with the people in our lives because the quality of our lives depend on the quality of our relationships.

Support the show

Get your own copy of  - You Can Turn Conflict into Closeness