The Mother Wound: A Deep Dive into Loss, Love & Healing

In this powerful and tender episode, we explore the mother wound, a wound that lives in the body, heart, and spirit of many adoptees. From the primal loss of our first mother to the complex dynamics with adoptive mothers, this episode opens a space for truth-telling, grief, compassion, and healing.

Whether your relationship with your mother was loving, strained, nonexistent, or unknown—this conversation offers language, insight, and community for making sense of the invisible layers that shape our sense of safety, self-worth, confidence and belonging.

We share:

• What the mother wound is and why it matters
• How it shows up in adoptee experiences
• The connection between the mother wound and core wounds like abandonment, shame, and mistrust
• Our personal stories around mother loss and healing
• How community, self-parenting, and ancestral reconnection can begin to mend the ache

If you’ve ever felt the longing for a mother’s love, struggled with guilt or grief around your mother story, or wondered how to begin healing these tender places—this episode is for you.

💬 Topics We Explore:

• Healthy boundaries with our Mothers
• The inherited pain of maternal separation, especially in intercountry and transracial adoption
• Breaking the silence around grief, anger, and unmet needs
• Navigating ambivalent feelings toward our mothers—both birth and adoptive
• The power of collective healing spaces and learning to mother ourselves

📣 📣 📣 Announcement:  We have thoughtfully decided to change from weekly episodes to Bi-weekly.  Every other Monday we will be dropping a new episode!

🆘 Mental Health Resources:

If you're struggling or feeling overwhelmed, please know you're not alone.
 Reach out for support:

• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988 (US)
• Crisis Text Line: Text HELLO to 741741
• SAMHSA Treatment Helpline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
• For AAPI communities: https://www.asianmhc.org

💌 We’d love to hear from you:
If this episode resonated, feel free to reach out, ask questions, or share your story. You are not alone. You are deeply worthy of love and healing.

If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. Share this episode with others who may benefit from understanding and overcoming self-sabotage in their relationships! We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

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In this enlightening and deeply heartfelt follow-up episode, we welcome back Mike Malloy, a Korean American adoptee, veteran, and community builder. Mike returns to share his powerful experience with psilocybin-assisted therapy, originally sought to support his PTSD from military service, and how it unexpectedly brought long-buried aspects of his adoption story to light.

Mike speaks vulnerably about how this journey helped him access core emotional wounds—some stemming not only from his time in the military but from his earliest beginnings as an adoptee. Through plant medicine and supported integration, he began to process layers of loss, disconnection, and identity, finding new pathways toward wholeness.

We also explore the healing power of community and being witnessed in our truth. For Mike, healing didn’t just happen in isolation—it deepened through sharing his story, being held in compassionate spaces, and realizing he’s not alone.

💬 In This Episode, You'll Hear:

• Why Mike turned to psilocybin-assisted therapy for PTSD
• How the experience unexpectedly illuminated adoption-related trauma
• What surfaced around identity, loss, and the core wounds of early separation
• The role of community in helping him integrate and feel seen in his story
• Reflections on the emotional toll of service and survival
• What healing can look like when we’re open to new tools and safe support

🌿 This Episode Is For You If:

• You’re curious about alternative approaches to healing trauma
• You’re an adoptee or trauma survivor seeking deeper understanding of your emotional patterns
• You’ve ever felt like your pain was “too much” or “too complicated” to name
• You believe in the power of community, storytelling, and shared healing

💌 We’d love to hear how this episode resonates with you.
Reach out anytime if you feel inspired to share your story—or if you’re looking for support on your healing path.If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. 

Share this episode with others who may benefit from understanding and navigating the adoptee journey. We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

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In this episode, Laurie and Claire delve into the nuanced topic of microaggressions within the adoption community. 

This discussion was inspired by a KAAN (Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network) Conference workshop that Laurie and Claire attended. We want to help bring microaggressions into the light so that we can talk about them, normalize our feelings around them, and give us tools to navigate through them.

Key Discussion Points:

What is a Microaggression?

A comment or action that subtly expresses a hostile, derogatory, or prejudiced attitude (intentionally or unintentionally) toward a member of a marginalized group.

What are Adoption Microaggressions?

These are microaggressions based on identities, relationships, and/or experiences connected to adoption. They often stem from societal misunderstandings or biases about adoption.

What you can expect to learn:

• A clear understanding of microaggressions: What they are and how they impact marginalized groups and individuals.
• Insights into adoption-specific microaggressions: Common phrases and interactions adoptees often encounter.
• An exploration of the themes of adoption microaggressions (Baden, 2016): Including Microinvalidation, Microinsult, and Microfiction.
• Personal stories and reflections: Hearing firsthand accounts of how these moments shape identity and belonging and how we navigate through them.
• Actionable strategies for empowered responses: Practical tools like Boundary Setting, Re-Framing, Educating, Disengaging, and Grounding.

Resources cited:

Naming & Navigating
Adoption Microaggressions
Aeriel A. Ashlee, PhD (she/her) & DeLa Dos, PhD (they/them)
KAAN Conference ~ June 20-22, 2025 ~ Atlanta, GA

Baden, A. L. (2016). Do you know your real parents?” and other adoption
microaggressions. Adoption Quarterly, 19(1), 1-25.

Lu, J. & Tseng, A. (2021, June 1). Verbal jiujitsu, disarming and other tips for dealing
with microaggressions. Los Angeles Times.
https://www.latimes.com/lifestyle/story/2021-06-01/what-is-a-microagression-h
ow-to-address-subtle-racism

Sue, E. W. (2010). Microaggressions and marginality: Manifestations, dynamics, and impact. John Wiley & Sons.

If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. Share this episode with others who may benefit from understanding and navigating adoptee microaggressions. We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

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In this follow-up conversation, we welcome back Julie Duvall—an aged-out Korean orphan, late-life adoptee, and fierce advocate for adult Korean orphans. Julie returns to share more deeply about her ongoing journey of healing, faith, and purpose.

We dive into the realities faced by those who grow up in orphanages without ever being adopted, and the emotional landscape that unfolds in adulthood—from identity formation to grief, resilience, and love. Julie opens her heart about what has helped her not only survive, but thrive, and how she’s using her story to uplift others through her nonprofit, Love Beyond the Orphanage.

This episode is an invitation to listen with compassion, to learn from narratives often left out of adoption conversations, and to reflect on how we support one another in healing.

💬 What You'll Hear in This Episode:

• Julie’s reflections on how adulthood continues to reveal new layers of healing and grief as an aged-out orphan
• The emotional journey of being adopted at 23 and how this impacted her sense of self and belonging
• How faith, mentorship, and community have shaped Julie’s path forward
• Insights on how society can better support orphans who age out of institutional care
• Updates on Love Beyond the Orphanage and its mission to walk alongside adult orphans with dignity and love
• Encouragement and wisdom for adoptees, orphans, and allies navigating their own healing journey

📚 Resources & Connect:

🌐 Website: Love Beyond the Orphanage
📧 Email: [email protected]

📚 Additional Resources & Support:

• Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
• Therapy & Emotional Support: Look for identity-affirming therapists on https://www.inclusivetherapists.com

💌 We’d love to hear from you:
If this episode resonated, feel free to reach out, ask questions, or share your story. You are not alone. You are deeply worthy of love and healing.

If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. Share this episode with others who may benefit from understanding and overcoming self-sabotage in their relationships! We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show

This week, join Laurie and Claire for a special mini-episode as they share their pre-KAAN conference jitters and excitement! Heading to a large conference, even one filled with supportive community, can bring on a mix of emotions. Laurie and Claire open up about their feelings and, in true Empowered Adoptee fashion, offer some quick and easy tools to help you navigate any nervousness or anxiety you might be feeling about attending KAAN or any other emotional events.

Connect with Us at KAAN!

We would love to connect with you in person this weekend! Please join Laurie and Claire (and Hollee) for our Morning Wellness Moment: Growing By Letting Go. This special session will be held on Saturday morning at 7:00 AM at the KAAN conference. It's a wonderful opportunity to start your day with intention and connect with others in a supportive space.

A Special Gift for Our Listeners!

As a thank you for being a part of our community, we have a special gift for all of our listeners attending KAAN! Be sure to stop by and say hello to Laurie and Claire to receive your gift. We can't wait to see you, connect, and hold space for our incredible KAD community.

In this episode, Laurie and Claire discuss:

• Their personal feelings and anticipation about attending the KAAN conference.
• Simple, actionable tips for managing nerves and anxiety before and during a conference.
• An invitation to our Morning Wellness Moment: Growing By Letting Go on Saturday at 7:00 AM.
• Details about a special gift for listeners attending KAAN.

We're so excited to connect with you all this weekend!

If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. Share this podcast with anyone who would like some support on their own adoptee journey. We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show

In this powerful and validating episode of The Empowered Adoptee Podcast, we explore the real reasons why breakups and loss can feel so devastating—not just emotionally, but physically and biochemically.

Whether it’s the end of a romantic relationship, the loss of a close friendship, estrangement, heartbreak activates some of the deepest parts of our nervous system and attachment wounds—especially for adoptees and anyone who has experienced early separation or relational trauma.

We break down:

• 🧠 What happens in the brain and body during a breakup
• 💔 The roles of dopamine, oxytocin, cortisol, and serotonin
• 🌪️ Why rejection and loss can feel like withdrawal or even danger
• 🛠️ Science-backed tools and nervous system support to help you heal
• 💌 Daily practices and gentle affirmations to remind you that you are worthy of love, connection, and safety—even in the midst of loss

🔄 What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The neuroscience behind romantic grief and emotional pain
• How our body reacts to emotional separation and loss
• Why it’s normal to feel disoriented, exhausted, or even physically ill after a breakup
• 8 ways to support your healing: from movement and nervous system regulation to emotional support and rewiring your routines

💗 This episode is for you if:

• You’re going through a breakup or grieving loss
• You’ve ever wondered why heartbreak feels so intense
• You’re looking for grounded, compassionate tools to regulate your body and emotions
• You're ready to start healing—gently, intentionally, and with love

🧘‍♀️ Journaling Prompts for Reflection:

• What is the story I’m telling myself about this loss? Is it true?
• How can I support myself with love and care this week?
• Where in my body am I feeling this pain—and what does it need?

📚 Additional Resources & Support:

• Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
• Therapy & Emotional Support: Look for identity-affirming therapists on https://www.inclusivetherapists.com

💌 We’d love to hear from you:
If this episode resonated, feel free to reach out, ask questions, or share your story. You are not alone. You are deeply worthy of love and healing.

If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. Share this episode with others who may benefit from understanding and overcoming self-sabotage in their relationships! We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show

In this vulnerable episode, Laurie and Claire dive deep into the complex topic of self-sabotage, particularly among adoptees. We explore the subconscious strategies that lead us to undermine our own relationships and goals, often driven by fear and core wounds. Join us as we uncover the common triggers, patterns of behavior, and the beliefs that perpetuate self-sabotaging actions. More importantly, we discuss practical steps to change these behavior patterns and foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

What you will learn about self-sabotage:

• Understanding the subconscious strategies we use to address unmet needs, which can ultimately harm our relationships.
• Identifying feelings of abandonment, rejection, and core wounds linked to adoption experiences.
• Recognizing fears of intimacy and vulnerability that lead to avoidance of deep connections.
• Learning how to spot recurring negative behaviors and their origins in past experiences.
• Examining core beliefs about self-worth and unfulfilled needs and how they fuel self-sabotaging behaviors.

Steps to Change Self-Sabotaging Behaviors:

• The importance of self-reflection and mindfulness in recognizing triggers and patterns.
• Developing skills to identify and process emotions, rather than avoiding them.
• Strategies for learning that art of open communication about our needs, boundaries, trust, and vulnerability with others.
• The value of joining support groups or adoptee led spaces which hold space for our adoption-related issues.
• Practicing kindness towards oneself and celebrating progress in the journey toward change.

By understanding and addressing self-sabotaging behaviors, adoptees can pave the way for healthier relationships and a more fulfilling life. This episode offers both insights and actionable steps for listeners eager to transform their relational patterns and enhance their emotional well-being.

If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving a comment on The Empowered Adoptee Podcast. Share this episode with others who may benefit from understanding and overcoming self-sabotage in their relationships! We love you and appreciate all of your support <3

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show

In this powerful episode, we’re joined by Kari Rudd, a Korean adoptee based in Santa Barbara, California. Kari shares her transformative journey of searching for identity and belonging after her challenging experiences with adoption.

Kari was adopted at around six months old into a family that faced significant struggles. After being removed from her adoptive family as a teenager, she has lived a life marked by resilience and quest for understanding. Now serving alongside her husband, Eric, as ministers and administrators of a transitional living center and church, Kari offers a unique perspective on healing and community. She has embraced the KAD community over the past year, discovering a whole new world—and a whole new version of herself.

What to Expect in This Episode:

Kari candidly discusses her adoption experience and the profound effect it has had on her sense of self and belonging. We discuss themes such as identity, her struggles with her faith, fear, obligation, and guilt within the context of the church, racism, scarcity mindset and people pleasing as a trauma response, mental health issues, self-compassion and healing, and heartbreaks from corruption of government and privatized adoption agencies.

Connect with Kari here: 

[email protected]

Share your thoughts on this episode and connect with us on social media. Let’s continue the conversation on the importance of amplifying every adoptee’s story.

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

Summer Mini Retreat in Atlanta Now Open to All Adoptees! 

June 22–24, 2025 | Atlanta, GA

The intention of this summer retreat will be to continue the KAAN theme of “Growth and Change” We see you. We understand the complexities of your journey, and we invite you to join us for a transformative summer retreat designed specifically for you—a space to heal, connect, and reclaim your identity.

And we are excited to share that Laurie, Claire, and Hollee Mcginnis will all be attending KAAN this year! Please reach out if you are attending we would love to connect with you.

Imagine being in a sanctuary created by adoptees, for adoptees—surrounded by people who truly understand your story and the complexities of your experience. This retreat is not just an event; it's a chance to empower yourself, make meaningful connections, and foster transformation.

Expect a beautiful balance of rest, reflection, and empowerment, surrounded by supportive adoptee kin who truly understand the complexities of this journey.

What you can expect:

 Ancestral Healing: Dive deep into the rich tradition of making whole napa pogi kimchi with Hollee McGinnis, reclaiming the wisdom of those who came before us as we honor our heritage.

 Healing Modalities: Experience emotional release and nervous system regulation with EFT Tapping, Somatic Movement, and Somatic Breathwork—tools that will serve you long after the retreat.

 Nourishing Meals: Indulge in delicious, homemade Korean meals, prepared with love to nourish your body and soul.

 Ease of Travel: Enjoy free transportation from the KAAN event and the airport, making your journey as effortless as possible.

This is not just a retreat; it’s an invitation to transform your narrative.
Register by June 7th, 2025: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show

In this heartfelt episode of The Empowered Adoptee Podcast, we honor Mental Health Awareness Month by sharing personal stories from our own journeys with mental health as adoptees. We speak honestly about the challenges we’ve faced—grief, anxiety, depression, isolation—and the tools, practices, and moments of connection that helped us keep going.

We explore:

• The unique mental health challenges adoptees often experience
• The hidden layers of grief, identity loss, and survival that can surface over time
• What has helped us regulate our nervous systems and reconnect to hope
• Why it's so important to talk about mental health in the adoptee community
• How you are not alone—even when it feels like it

Whether you’re in the depths of it, supporting someone who is, or just starting to look inward—this episode is for you.

🛠️ Resources & Support

If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out:

• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (U.S.) – Call or text 988
  https://988lifeline.org
  Free, confidential support 24/7
• Crisis Text Line – Text HOME to 741741
  https://www.crisistextline.org
  For immediate support via text
• Asian Mental Health Collective – https://www.asianmhc.org
  A directory of Asian mental health professionals and support spaces
• NAAPIMHA (National Asian American Pacific Islander Mental Health Association)
  https://www.naapimha.org
• Therapy for Black Girls / Therapy for Latinx / Inclusive Therapists – If you're seeking identity-affirming therapists
• Adoptee Mental Health Resources:
  • Adoptees Connect https://www.adopteesconnect.com
  • Adoptees for Justice https://www.adopteesforjustice.org

Share your thoughts on this episode and connect with us on social media. Let’s continue the conversation on the importance of amplifying every adoptee’s story.

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]


Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review!
Your support helps us bring more powerful stories to light.
If you feel called to support The Empowered Adoptee Podcast it would mean the world to us!

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show

In this deeply moving episode, we sit down with Julie Duvall, a Korean aged-out orphan who was adopted later in life. Julie’s unique perspective sheds light on the complexities of growing up in an orphanage in Korea and her journey through finding her way in life without any support from a family of her own. With heartfelt honesty, she shares her experiences, the challenges she faced, and how she transformed her life from struggles and sadness to one of hope and joy. Through Julie's stories, we aim to bring insights and awareness to adoptees and orphans, emphasizing the message that every story matters and deserves to be heard.

What you will hear in this episode:

-Life in the Orphanage: Julie provides an intimate look at her childhood experiences growing up in a Korean orphanage, sharing the realities and challenges faced by children in similar situations.

- Perceptions of Orphans in Korea: Julie discusses societal views and treatment of orphans in Korea, offering a perspective that differs from many traditional adoption narratives.

- Influence of Molly Holt: Julie shares her memories of time spent working under the guidance of Molly Holt, a well known figure in many adoption stories, and how this experience shaped her journey and her identity.

- Transformation Through Adversity: Julie shares her inspiring story of resilience, detailing the struggles she faced and the steps she took to overcome them, ultimately leading to a life filled with hope.

- Empowerment of Adoptees: Together, we reflect on the importance of amplifying the voices of adoptees and orphans, encouraging listeners to appreciate and learn from stories that may differ from their own experiences.

-Julie's advocacy work through her non-profit organization Love Beyond The Orphanage. Her mission is to empower adult orphans with opportunities and support.

Love Beyond the Orphanage is a Christian Nonprofit Organization that focuses on giving loving support to aged-out orphans, especially in Korea, through educating, counseling, assisting and mentoring.

This organization was inspired by Julie, who had aged-out of an orphanage and then experienced being adopted as an adult.

Her passion to give a voice to aged out orphans was shared by another adult adoptee, and they co-founded this nonprofit to give hope and spread awareness.

Connect with Julie:

https://lovebeyondtheorphanage.org/

Email: [email protected]

If Julie’s story resonated with you, please consider writing to us or sending us your own story to share on the podcast! If you would like the opportunity to ask Julie more questions and hear more about her story, please reach out.

Share your thoughts on this episode and connect with us on social media. Let’s continue the conversation on the importance of amplifying every adoptee’s story.

If you would like to connect with us, you can find us here:

Website: https://www.theempoweredadoptee.com/
Facebook: The Empowered Adoptee 
Instagram: the.empowered.adoptee
Email: [email protected]

Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review!

Your support helps us bring more powerful stories to light.

If you feel called to support The Empowered Adoptee Podcast it would mean the world to us!

We would love to connect with you and hear from you! Please send us a text and share your story 💜

Support the show