The End of the Day Podcast with Kari Watterson: Using Mindset Work to Live Your Best Life

Episode 14 is a lot shorter and a little different. On this episode,I take a moment to talk to those struggling with depression. I've been quite open in past episodes and on social media about my decades-long struggle with depression, and how different tools helped me get to where I am today. By sharing openly, I hope to help reduce the stigma around mental health issues and to highlight the fact that mental health recovery and success are not not mutually exclusive.

As I make progress in my own journey, I never want to lose sight of how incredibly isolating and hopeless it felt to be depressed. It's easy to allow yourself to slip back into depressive symptoms if you don't take care of your mind and body. I started this podcast and my coaching practice to offer hope to those unable to see past their current struggles. I wanted to share tools that helped me break the cycle of rumination, tame my relentless inner critic and finally treat myself with more kindness and compassion than ever before.

My mission is to help others do the same.

For those who've never experienced the hopelessness and apathy of depression, this might seem foreign. But if this is your struggle, this episode is for you.

If depression is altering your life, please don't hesitate to seek professional help. There are so many options available.

You may not be able to see it, but you're just as valuable as everyone else. You deserve as much happiness as everyone else. You don't need to suffer. Help is available.

You are not alone.

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: @kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

We all compare ourselves to others once in awhile. We're human. But comparison itself is not necessarily a negative thing. If we compare for the purpose of finding areas of growth, it can be helpful and motivating.

But when we feel a sense of despair or hopelessness after the comparison...? That's what this episode tackles. Join me as I deconstruct compare and despair, and how the despair we experience can actually serve as the starting point for real change.

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: @kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

In this episode, I dive deep into the importance of consistency for achieving any kind of long-term success.

For those who've struggled with being consistent on things that matter, learning to stick to goals for an extended period of time can be a game changer.

Not only does consistency help shape our identity as someone who shows up and puts in the work for as long as it takes, but it also tests our humility. Are we willing to be bad at something at first so we can develop the skills to become amazing?

Consistency allows us to build a body of work so that we can improve, but also so we can ultimately make an informed decision about our ability. So often people want to become great fast, but skill and adeptness comes with time, practice and a conscious commitment to improvement.

When we work to become consistent at the things that matter to us, we learn how to be in it for the long haul. We learn to accept the "messy middle" or the "river of misery" as a crucial part of the process. Ira Glass calls this the most important part. It's in these periods that most of us want to quit because we don't feel like we're making satisfactory progress, but this is precisely when Glass says we need to commit to producing even more work so we can keep improving.

If we keep putting out volumes of work with a conscious commitment to improvement, we will allow ourselves to eventually reach the point where our level of skill will be on par with what we envision as great work in our minds.

This is the power of persistence and consistency.

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Cited in this episode:

Podcasts:

The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo

Make Money as a Life Coach Podcast with Stacey Boehman

Fearless Marketing for Life Coaches with Simone Grace Seol


Video Clip:

Ira Glass and What Every Successful Person Knows, But Never Says
(I chose to link to the passage and video clip offered on James Clear's website because consistency is tied so closely to habit work. Can we develop the habit of showing up every day with the goal of making small, incremental improvements over an extended period of time?)

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: @kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

When we commit to personal growth and finally start showing up for ourselves the way we've always wanted, it's not uncommon to experience some anxiety around whether we can sustain our progress.

This is particularly true for people who've struggled with consistency in the past. It shows up as an underlying fear that if we slack off even a little, we'll go right back to square one.

This fear comes up often in conversations with my coaching clients, and I've noticed it in my own journey as well, particularly when it comes to my habit tracker.

In January, I committed to practicing the belief I could transform my life, one small step at a time. I set microgoals in multiple areas and committed to not only recording my progress on a habit tracker for one full year, but to sharing the cumulative results publicly each month. I normally post the monthly review of my fitness efforts at the beginning of the following month.

For five full months, I was fairly diligent at recording my daily habits.

And as the visual evidence of my ability to be consistent and keep my word to myself grew, I started believing I was the type of person who could set goals and do the hard, consistent work to achieve them.

As my self-trust grew, so did my courage. I challenged myself to step outside my comfort zone more and more -- in business, in relationships, and most importantly, in my relationship with myself.

Enter June.

The thing about personal development tools is they're just that, tools. We can find them motivating and use them as catalysts for growth, or we can use them as weapons against ourselves.

And in June, I realized I had developed an unhealthy relationship with my habit tracker. I noticed I was letting this 8.5 x 11 inch sheet of paper dictate whether I could feel good about myself or not.

But, you and I know the habit tracker was not the problem. Attaching my self-worth and inherent value as a person to the habit tracker was.

The good news is, the sooner we recognize our self-destructive ways, the sooner we can interrupt the negative thought patterns and get ourselves back on track.

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Cited in this episode:

Podcasts:

The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo
Ep. 26: The Self Coaching Model

How to Stop Quitting Podcast with Heather Deveaux
Interview Series 2: Kacey Hayes

Self-compassion resources:

Website: Kristin Neff, Ph.D: https://self-compassion.org/

Article: "The 5 Myths of Self-Compassion: What Keeps Us From Being Kinder to Ourselves?" by Kristin Neff, Ph.D. (originally published in Psychotherapy Networker)

Book:

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck, Ph.D.

Habit tracker:

thegoalchaser.com

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: @kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

The Self-Compassion Minute is a super short message of hope and inspiration to help you through your day. It's a new series that I hope to drop once a week, separate from my regular podcast episode which uploads on Wednesdays (except for this week).

The messages are meant to serve as examples of a more compassionate way of working through your struggles. Although the voice is mine, imagine you are speaking these words to yourself.

Today's Self-Compassion Minute is for those times you wonder if you have it in you to keep pushing through your fears. This is especially relevant if you're working to break a particularly painful pattern of behavior. You've been doing courageous work, but you feel like every time you process and push through one level, a fresh level of fear appears.

As always, your fear response kicks in, but this time your body's call to retreat seems really strong. You're tired of always doing growth work. It can't be "working" if you keep butting up against more fears, right?

This clip is for you.

Growth fatigue has come up quite a bit lately in conversations with clients, and in my own growth work as well.

This is where self-compassion can be really powerful.

Self-compassion means being there for ourselves during painful times, without judgment or harsh self-criticism, acknowledging our humanness with kindness and compassion, and reminding ourselves of what we're trying to do.

We often mistakenly believe self-compassion means giving ourselves an out. In fact, there is a growing body of empirical evidence suggesting that those who practice self-compassion during difficult times bounce back faster, are more emotionally resilient and spend far less time in rumination.

Doing this work actually strengthens our resolve to continue moving TOWARD our goals.

As Kristin Neff, Ph.D. states, this is when we choose to be our best ally or our worst enemy.

Take a listen, and then email me or DM me on Instagram (contact info below). I'd love to hear what you think. Until then, have a beautiful day.

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Self-compassion resources:

Website: Kristin Neff, Ph.D: https://self-compassion.org/

Article: "The 5 Myths of Self-Compassion: What Keeps Us From Being Kinder to Ourselves?" by Kristin Neff, Ph.D. (originally published in Psychotherapy Networker)

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: @kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

On this episode, I interview my good friend and colleague in the personal growth space, Matt Clarke.

Matt and I met at a time when we were both doing some deep work on ourselves, and we connected over our mutual passion for personal development and mindset work.

I specifically invited Matt on the podcast because, to me, he exemplifies what's possible when you have the courage and ambition to move toward your fears and to do the inner work so you can take action and finally allow yourself to experience the richness of life.

From perfectionism to crippling self-doubt manifesting itself in the later years as an extreme, chronic OCD condition (nicknamed the doubting anxiety disease), Matt's personal development journey is nothing short of inspiring.

Matt shares valuable insight into how he was able to finally stop living with the brakes on, and start moving forward in life.

This was such a fantastic conversation. It's a long episode, for sure, but I believe you'll become as engaged in Matt's story and insights as I was.

Thank you as always for listening.

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As you'll find out in the podcast, Matt has some fascinating projects coming up. To stay in the loop, you'll want to follow him on these platforms:

Instagram: @mscinsights
Twitter: @mscinsights
Medium: https://medium.com/@mscinsights
YouTube: mscinsights

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Cited in this episode:

Podcasts:
The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo
Unf*ck Your Brain with Kara Loewentheil

Books:
Atomic Habits by James Clear
The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

In this episode, I share what it means to take emotional responsibility, and why it's such an important part of any personal development journey. When we understand how our brains are hardwired, and how our thoughts, feelings and actions create results, we can see how accepting responsibility for what we choose to think and feel can help us change our lives.

Also, if you've ever been curious to know how a mindset coach can help you in your personal or professional life, stay tuned to the very end. Learn what I hear from my clients and why I believe so passionately that mindset work changes lives and can help you change yours, too.
 
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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

------

For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

When we see someone pursuing their passion, we want to know how they got there. We're curious because we want to find our purpose as well. We want to find our path in life, too.

I sometimes get asked this same question. And after years of following and quitting many different paths, I realized what was different about my path to becoming a mindset coach was that, this time, I chose it, worked my thoughts around how I was going to make it happen, and then took imperfect action, over and over again.

There comes a point in life when we reach a tipping point -- when the decisions we make and the actions we take tip the scales toward a life-changing moment. In this episode, I share the steps I took after a lifetime of settling to finally go after what I really wanted.

And chances are, many of the things I share are not what you might expect.

If you've ever wondered if your dreams are possible, too, this episode is just for you.

Also, if you've ever been curious to know how a mindset coach can help you in your personal or professional life, stay tuned to the very end. Learn what I hear from my clients and why I believe so passionately that mindset work changes lives and can help you change yours, too.
 
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Cited in this episode:

Podcast: The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo

Quote: Byron Katie: "Who would you be without that thought?" Taken from "The Work" (Four Questions)

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com.

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

Before starting any personal development journey, it's helpful to have an idea of where we're starting from rather than jumping straight to where we want to be. 

When we're first starting out, it may feel like we don't know who we are, but it's often because we haven't taken the time to really sit down, quiet our minds and allow ourselves to discover that part of us. So many of us are too busy trying to avoid thinking too deeply about ourselves because all we see is what we think is wrong with us. But when we take the time to acknowledge the good in us before we start making sweeping changes, we're affirming that we're changing to grow and not in order to be worthy.

In this episode, I share exercises that I often recommend to clients who are struggling to find their path in life. These exercises help them get in touch with their current selves, clarify who they aspire to be, and provide a framework for creating a more meaningful and purpose-driven life. I have done this work in my own life which I share in this episode to give you a sense of how you can use this work in your life, too.

When you do this work on your present and future self, you are pulling your greatest wishes out of your subconscious and into your awareness. And when you're aware of what you're striving for, your goals and dreams become possible and you start acting with more purpose and intention.

This is a long episode but one I hope you'll find extremely valuable.

Also, if you've ever been curious to know how a mindset coach can help you in your personal or professional life, stay tuned to the very end. Learn what I hear from my clients and why I believe so passionately that mindset work changes lives and can help you change yours, too.
 
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Cited in this episode:

George Winston - Classical pianist

Jocko Willink - Retired Navy Seal, motivational speaker, author of the Way of the Warrior Kid book series

Podcast: The "Getting to Grips With" Podcast with Tom Watson; Episode 16 with Nathan Arnold, former professional footballer in the UK and founder of Nathan Arnold Coaching

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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com. 

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson

In this episode I share more of my personal journey from rock bottom to where I am today, and it all started with building my self-trust.

Everybody loves the idea of changing their lives, but not everyone believes they can. I was one of those people for the longest time. I'd set lofty goals with the best of intentions but then crash and burn after a few weeks. Or worse, I'd write out my goals but start backpedaling even before the ink was dry.

When I finally was honest with myself, I realized I had this underlying belief that I could not trust myself to follow through. I could set all the goals I wanted but until I learned to trust that I would keep my word to myself, any accomplishment would be short-lived and unsustainable.

Once I put systems in place to slowly build my self-trust, my life improved dramatically. I started setting goals in ways that worked with my brain instead of overwhelming it. I used visual cues like a habit tracker to track my progress and to remind myself of my intentionss daily. I incorporated mindset tools + habit development techniques + identity work in my daily practice and slowly started becoming the type of person who showed up day after day to do the work to become the person I longed to be.

And it all started with microgoals and microwins. Sometimes, in order to achieve the big things you want in life, you have to first start small. You have to trust that you're going to keep your word to yourself, When you trust yourself to do the small things, you'll start to believe the big goals are possible. After all, when you break it down, big goals are just a series of much smaller goals.

If you want to learn how to start building your self-trust one small step at a time so you can do the things you want in life, this episode is for you.

And if you've ever been curious to know how a mindset coach could help you in your personal or professional life, stay tuned to the very end. Learn what I hear from my clients and why I believe so passionately that mindset work changes lives and can help you change yours, too.
 
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Original intro/outro music by JMW.

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To learn more about what I do, my coaching philosophy and how to work with me, email me at [email protected] or visit my website at https://kariwatterson.com. 

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For more mindset thoughts and tips, follow me on social media:

Instagram: kari_mindsetcoach
Twitter: @KaWatterson