This week we are rebounding from an abysmal Episode 007! Did Episode 007 make you cry? Did it make you break down? Did it shatter your illusions of love? And is it over now? Do you know how to pick up the pieces and go home? The answer is, yes!

 

In Episode 008 I touch on every major player in the Face/Off universe! Who are they? Why are they? What is the significance of their involvement in the high-drama playing out in the streets and in between the sheets of Los Angeles, circa 1997?

 

Also in this episode:insects in skin suits, The Merry-go-Round of Madness, the worst actors, the best actors, Franz Kafka, epic tragedy, wild inferences, and a special visit from the Dukes of Hazzard movie!

I think this episode probably sucks! I didn't have fun making it, and I was bored the whole time! Feeling adventurous? Need a break from your happy, fun, life? Like to listen to a fat, white dude ramble incoherently? This might be the episode for you!

 

In this episode: Fame, Ice-T, revenge murder, kicks to the balls, severely whack social commentary, dumb ideas, and boring chatter!

In episode six, suicide! Finally! The ultimate simple solution to a complicated problem! Get in there Face/Off, we can do it! Pull up your boots and grit your tits!

 

Also in this episode: food and/or lack thereof, militia nut-jobs who get to keep their cash, metaphor movies, body-switch movies, trigger movies, sacred cows shoved from precarious pedestals, the validity of art as an institution, hairy knuckles, and the Oscar goes to Harve Presnell!

On the fifth episode of The Face/Off Podcast, do we even recognize the fresh-faced goobers that we once were, five whole weeks ago? 

 

Battle worn and weary, I get down and dirty and work to define the structure of the answer to the question: Dear god, what does it all mean?

 

I talk about some fun words, unacknowledged crimes, punishments, sulfuric acid, and Danny Masterson's skillful portrayal of Karl “The Date Raper”!

In this episode, the student becomes the master, and reality is torn asunder as perception splits leaving a gaping chasm of endless madness! Nothing will ever be the same!

 

Depression, mustaches, dead kids and the deeper meaning of dead kids, movies better than Face/Off, Rotten Tomatoes is garbage because we are garbage and life in general is garbage, drugs, special boxes, merry-go-rounds, murder, murder, murder, kill, kill, kill!

 

It's actually a pretty low key episode! Fuck yeah!

The journey to enlightenment continues in Episode Three of The Face/Off Podcast! In this episode, the third viewing of the film proves to be somehow even more lackluster than the first and second viewings!

 

Also in this episode: regret, body hair, Gavin Belson, the absurdity of countdowns, drugs, tonal shifts, and several attempts to talk about anything other than Face/Off!

What have I done?

 

The spiraling descent into madness begins as my worldview unravels and the threadbare fabric of my mind splits under the pressure of just two viewings of the film Face/Off! Can it really be this bad? Yes! Yes it can!

 

Deep metaphor, place, guns, songs, and insults to dumb actors! Its all here for the taking!

Welcome to The Face/Off Podcast with me, Derek Schoonover.

 

The Face/Off Podcast is a 52 episode experiment/journey of self discovery/endurance test/descent into madness/attempt at a unifying theory of everything.

 

In the future we will find that even the smallest measurement of matter holds all of the coded blueprints for everything that has ever existed and everything that will ever exist. Much in the same the DNA provides a window in to the traits and characteristics of a person, we will discover the secret libraries of the universe.

 

Extrapolating from this theory, and pulling it out of the future and into the now, I became convinced that one could conceivably discover the coded blueprints to everything there ever was, is, or will be, hidden in the greasy folds of some random piece of American cinema. Enter Face/Off. Each week, for 52 weeks, I will watch Face/Off with new eyes and report back my findings. Eventually I hope to break through some dimensional time border and touch the face of forever.

 

Welcome to the show.

 

In the inaugural episode of The Face/Off Podcast, we dig deep into my new first impressions of Face/Off and discuss some of the surface level implications of the film.