Your earbuds will get high and talk about how dope a podcast about them would be when Instagram Jesus arrives at the PYFC in the second coming with Big Lucks, Ol’ Blue Eyes, Schwartz and Chumahan, Instagram Jesus will wash away all your social media sins, walk on digital water and heel thicc chicks, he presides over the resurrection of the lost early episodes, he rolls back the rock and we hear the Unholy Trinity of Talk’s earliest episodes, the ones that died in the womb, the one’s not fit for daylight, examine what went right and what went terribly wrong, you’ll choke, you’ll puke you’ll laugh so hard bubbles will form in your blood, DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS SHOW IF YOU HAVE A WEAK SPINE.
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HLS: Ep.292: Instagram Jesus & Proto-Episodes
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Okay, let's do it.
good morning and welcome to the hard luck show. And you're certified qualified west side host lucky. That's right. Ladies and gentlemen, you two did to the greatest show on earth. It's the hard luck show coming to you from Santa Monica youth center in Santa Monica, California sitting across from me, my cold stem partner.
Oh shit.
Oh, I'm in Southern California. I must have superpowers five pounds.
ah, sound engineer or blue eyes. John Lewis certified audio in
nobody move. Nobody move. Nobody get it.
he said he want me to join the army
and our show runner Xtrordinair. Mr. Brian Schwartz. Slow gurus.
This is a whistle along song.
uh, shorts
live from Kiev Baba fly from Cuban with Andrew Chimu live from,
you got a trip there with Danny from it's all bad. I know, I know we're both fucking
man. Me and Danny got to go to Kevin, visit the mother and visual.
okay. Tomorrow,
if you're lucky energy rose on the roof, the roof, I will tell you something. There was a weird moment there when I was yelling Ali Baba, and he was looking at me through his dreads with like one gleaming eyes. And it was like, there was a point of madness between us. He was like, looking at me like, is this guy really fucking, this pumped up right now?
Yeah. Oh, what's up,
right? Yeah. What's up Ali taking care of visuals. Ali's on it. Ali, the calm, his camera, man. This side of the Mississippi, all he's going to have to give a little bit of a training session for he leaves. Oh no, we got other cameras are going to take on the handle that I don't know. But have you ever done meditation Ali?
Yeah, like I feel like you're a guy that could really get into like some Zen. It wouldn't be as hard. Right, right. Like, uh, like if you went to a silent retreat, he'd be like, cool. Yeah. Most definitely. I try to meditate every day. What, what, what kind of meditation do you do? What kind of meditation? I do. Uh, you were in a court room, they would already found you guilty.
Can you repeat the question? Like that's the, that's the winner? Well, I just like try just to focus on my breathing and try not to think. I try to just like, hear my surroundings, but it's kind of hard. Cause like my mind is like racing. Yeah. That's why I don't talk. I just think right. Really well. Yeah. You see all this stuff, he's doing all the creative stuff he does.
I would imagine that his, his, he is probably moving at a lot higher pace. Are you? Yup. I have a older brother, but I don't live with him. Like I grew up with my mom only. Ah, that's why I thought you were only child. Cause you said you grew up with your mom only. Well. My brother's a lot older than me. So it's almost like you're an only child.
Yeah. But you're really not only there's. Yeah. Like I never like lived with him. Right. Who did he take you out to throw the ball around and stuff? My imaginary friend. What was his dog? Kitty? I kidding. Sean had an imaginary friend. I did. Pre-launch he still does chores. Listen, chips is my imagine, dude, Shawn, Shawn told me, right.
He's like, come dressed up as far till next time he might start crying. You see that? Sean told me he sent a thing out and he's like, I was telling him, what was it? You were telling you son, Kuwait, about your imaginary. Uh, go ahead. Well, I don't, I don't remember this conversation. He said, he's telling his son coined about his imaginary friend and then in quiet, you know, quits five, so quits, like whatever, you know, blah, blah, blah.
You know, but then later Shawn's like, I reflected on that and I just thought, man, that just sounds so sad. Do you remember saying that? No, but it does sound sad to be telling your son about a friend that's not actually there. It's got us all sad, sad. I mean, I've watched a lot of like sitcoms and in the sitcoms, the psychiatrists were always trying to tell the little kid, it gets normal to have like an imaginary.
Oh, don't even worry about it. I think you only have an imaginary friend out of necessity cause there's nothing really. Yeah. What's your take on that shorts? I don't know. I mean, I think an imaginary friend could just be, you know, somebody's creative, uh, Abilities like showing at a young age and just kinda having that.
I dunno. I guess he can be sad. My mom said that I would just blame shit on the imaginary friend. Right. That's like going to have a scapegoat, you know, built in, but to see that kind of makes sense, though, that shows your devious creative nature, but you would do fucked up shit and then you will blame some imaginary.
That's not that sad, bro. Right. In fact, I invent this motherfucker to take the heat, right. Like on family circus when they had that little ghost kid named not me. And they just blame that shit on that. Right. So you blamed it on a California highway patrol officer. That's kind of weird shit. Yeah. The cool one we had, I guess.
So that's crazy now that I think about it, I don't actually remember it. My mom tells me that, oh, well then maybe. You don't remember having the imaginary friend? No, I don't think I ever had an imaginary friend. I think when I was a kid though, I fucking lied my ass off, bro. I was lying from sun up to sun fucking down, bro.
I mean, I remember being in the backyard at our house and all the kids be around. And I remember somehow we started talking about the devil. I don't know. And I was telling stories like, oh yeah, I saw the devil last night, came in my room. I said, devil, what are you doing? I said, get the fuck on out. And the devil left, he wanted to take my soul though.
He was asking, I was like, Hmm, I almost signed on the dotted line. And all this shit was made up and other kids were like, really? I'm like, man, would I be lying to you? Yeah, that was what happened. I have a fucking lion bro. That's crazy Schwartz. Did you have an imagination? No. No imaginary friends though.
Yeah. I think that's crazy, but I did see paunch all the time as a kid growing up, you did just to see the guy in fucking seafood, broiler and bed bath and beyond. I swear to God, man. I used to run into that motherfucker. Like he was following me, Eric Estrada, Erik Estrada. What was he buying at? Bed bath and beyond like Cole sided pillow.
I don't even know, man. Those were back in the, uh, the early bed bath and beyond days, huge chips. Oh, yeah, no, no, no. Yeah. Paunch and baker. Right? Wait a minute. How old are you bro? He's 42. Oh, okay. I thought you were younger than that. Everybody. I know. Everybody thinks he's like fucking 34 or something. Yeah.
Okay. Yeah. You're in there. Yeah. No, I, I remember Chip's come on, man. You have an imaginary friend. The only time I have like an imaginary friend is when I've been up too many days on that. Got a lot of friends. I remember long after the, the, the, I was deep in the addiction. The kids were no longer staying with me.
The girls were gone. I'd been in my house by myself for a while already tweaking. Yeah. And I would after maybe like, you know, somewhere in that, like four to six day of no sleep, I'd be having conversations in my house with my kids. Wow. And with like maybe jewelry, shall I got to be I'm in conversations.
And we would constantly, when they were there in real life, I would have these conversations from room to room. Yo, you need to do that. All right. Get the kids ready. I left the front door open, right of right. I would be doing this hi thinking they were all in the house with me still until I would come to realize snap out and be like, dude, I've been talking for the last two hours and none of them are here.
What's alone. What's the realization when you snap out of it. So bomber is like how he said, it's kind of sad. Like I asked him, describe his son. It's that same type of feeling like, damn, I'm 40 something. High math in a home. I'm about to lose tweaking out. I can't stop using this shit. Fuck. And I'm trying to relive this shit.
That's the longest. But it's like it's embedded my fucking default goes there. Crazy man, crazy drug. You know, when I was at your head up, man, when I was a kid growing up, I think I might've. I was telling Schwartz about this the other day. I never, I loved the bad dudes. I loved the villains. And when it came to like star wars, I wanted to be Darth Vader and I wanted to beat our Vader over Luke Skywalker.
Cause I was like, Luke, Skywalker's a punk. He's got raggedy ass clothes. He's crying all the time. He's like asking for help from everybody, but fucking Darth Vader could fucking just pinch the air and choke your shit from across the room. And I wanted to do that. And then, then like, I'm like thinking about this show and I'm like, maybe this is like part of that weird, like, you know, dark side of me that wants to fucking fuck with people and fucking de LA it's like that Vader shit coming out, like living out that fantasy here on the show, the sadistic one.
And dude, I used to want to be a vampire ghost growing up and I didn't want to be no nice vampire. And it wasn't about drinking blood. I mean, I knew that came with it, but I wanted it to be fucking Dracula. That dude was cool, man. He had fucking he's oh, he's wearing a tuxedo. Yeah, fucking medallion and a Cape.
And he fucking bitches. Oh. Be like looking at me like, oh my child coming to me and they would just be like, they couldn't stop. He's immortal, immortal. He's strong as fuck. Strong fly, fly. It's a superhero, right? I'm not feel like there's a relationship between Darth Vader and the vampire, like Jakiela and Darth Vader are maybe cut from the same clot.
Yeah. They both have capes, you know, he got, uh, we got, we got an imaginary friend. Yeah. We do have an imaginary friend. We got a guy who might have imaginary friends running through his brain right about now. Right, right. Before the, uh, world war three eroded, uh, exploded. We were trying to do a show on Antonio brown.
Yeah, we were. Can we, can we introduce our imaginary friend? Oh man. Right. All right. All right. I forgot about that. My bad. All right. So what's the right intro song for, Hey, Zeus. Jesus walks. He's got a Tupac poster in the background. I know. No, I like where a Schwartz was going here. Where are you going? He's going here.
Jesus walks. Okay.
Hold on. Let me fix it. We'll edit this. No, definitely getting a copyright fucking thing for this Harley
ladies and gentlemen known internationally as Instagram. Jesus saving all digital soul one at a time. A man who needs no introduction. A man who is the second coming of the metaverse. Oh boy. Hey Zeus. Jesus Instagram. Welcome to the show. Yeah, you got nice teeth, bro. How come your ketones man? He's got fucking nice fucking teeth partner.
I wish I had them. I can't see from here because Shawn's blocking. I wish I grew up looks at what's going on there. How much man? What's up. Hurry up and get, get home from work. What was the w w you were hurrying up to get on the show? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because I didn't want to do it in the car. Why not?
Because I didn't, I probably would have a best signal. Like I did last time when I was, was on it. So what kind of remind everybody? What kind of work do you do on a day job? Uh, merchandise. And in what way? I, I worked for Coca-Cola, so I merchandise all this stuff and throw it on the shelf. So I give the gloats like today I had 600 cases at Walmart and then two other stores, when nothing, the other stores, I just had a much nice, like, like just work, the stuff that was in the back.
Right. So you show up at Walmart now, what time would you show up? All right. I gotta be there at five in the morning, so I leave my house. I'll work in the valley. So it takes about 30 minutes to get. 30 40 minutes actually. And, uh, so I gotta be there at five so I can get it by like 3, 3 45 in the morning.
Yeah. And then when you're there and so what you're arranging the Coca-Cola and everything on the shelves. Yeah. So I put all this stuff on the shelves. Did you have to go pick it up and drive it over? No. So, so we have three different periods. So we have salesmen that go into the store and, uh, bring in, uh, see what we need.
And then we got truck drivers. So the truck driver brings me, this brings me this stuff and he drops it off and I work in kind of creatures. Do you see walking around Walmart inside of like 4 35 in the morning, all ties it all types of creatures. Right? Go ahead. Obviously people stealing shit all the time in front of me.
I to watch it. Yeah. Like, what do they do? They just take the stuff and put it down their pants. Yeah. Well they down their pants down in their, in their, in their, uh, in their, uh, persons, whoever, you know, if it's a woman uppers guys down their pants or self scan, you know what I mean? The self scan sheet.
Right? Yeah. And they'll, they'll get expensive shit. And then I'm at Walmart. Yeah. Walmart. Yeah. So then they track that they, the people think they're not watching them. You know how they're watching it to that little phone scene if you're scanning everything. Yeah. So they catch them and they're like, oh no, I didn't.
I didn't, you know, I scanned it. I know I scanned it. And then they be like, uh, they'll buy the food. Right. They'll try to buy the food and then sneak in like DVDs or whatever. And they, and then they, I saw one guy the other day was telling, saying all I. I switched my wallet and I put a different card. I know this card had money, but I forgot my other wallet.
I did it last night and he just kept, you know, just making the blazers as the, as he went. What's the weirdest thing you've ever seen. Anyone steal, like, yeah. Like, was there a big thing? Like someone tried to steal like a toilet seat? No, but I seen, I seen fools, uh, jump on a bicycle. You know how they have there's so bicycles there, right?
The shit. Yeah. Right out the front door.
I seen that as new, full, still TVs and they can't do nothing. They can't, they can't do nothing to them. What is. Yeah, cause they don't want to get sued. I used to steal shit from Walmart. Did you want to ask you? When I, when I lived in Odessa, Texas, man, I used to walk in, they had one of those super Walmarts, like it was fucking gigantic and I would walk in one side and I would grab, they had Marlboro 20 fives.
They had 25 cigarettes in a pack and I would grab to walk out the other door. It was crazy, man. I also stole a lot of gas out there. Right. Because they just, you know, unlike out here where they stopped turning on the pumps before you pay all the pumps are active. I used to work at Walmart. Yup. I used to work at Walmart and my undergrad stocking shelves, homie stocking shelves with a box cutter on my hip.
Working. And I was like 18, right? Like I said, I'm going to get myself a real job, you know? And I walked in, I went through the interview process and it was crazy. Cause it was Walmart. But like they put me through some fucking, there was like a three-level interview. I'm like, isn't this the government. I was like, this is Walmart, right?
Like what are you doing? I'm in college. That should just be the United States. They're like, Hey. And they had like a questionnaire that you had to bubble it in to see if you had the right psychological makeup to work at Walmart. Right. And w at one point and listen, this is true stuff. Make a logical makeup to work.
Your Walmart. Can't be too smart to be in there. I listened to it. So I was bubbling it all in. Right. And it was this one class I'll never forget. As long as all that. There's a question that says getting ahead and success depends on who, you know, strongly agreed that dah, dah, dah, dah. Right. So I bubble in strongly agree.
Cause I'm like, yeah, that makes sense. So the fucking manager who is like one of these guys with like a tie and a shirt, right? It's a short sleeve shirt. The one that you did when you buy the shirt, the tie comes with it. It's they get all a match. And he sits me down with his little cup of coffee in the McDonald section of the fucking Walmart, the fucking hammer.
Uh, he had some questions. Yeah. We ain't going to let just anybody come in here. So we goes down and I'm passing it all. Then he gets to that question. Right. And he goes, what do you mean that your success depends on who, you know, do you believe in nepotism or favoritism? And I looked at him and I was like, no, man, because.
Who you know, is in your network. And there's lots of different opportunities that can happen if you utilize and face the people that you know, and use them the right way. And he was like, he like stroked his mustache. He's like good ads. And I was there and I was stocking dude. And I'll tell you, there was a hot chick up in there, bro.
I won't say her name, but man, she was hot. Fucking Venezuelan is Wayland. And I was in there bro, spending my pay, check on McDonald's food and trying to hit that. Um, but anyway, yeah, so I worked at Walmart, man. I'm proud to say it. Biggest parking lot I've ever seen. Um, Hey Zeus, uh, do you get, do you drink soda?
No. No. I'll drink energy drinks. You do, but that's not six. Like you do. Hey, he's off. I'm off. I'm on like two. Oh, yeah, that's the guy you're off for this stop. Well, I just want to start again, Mr. And Mrs. Earbuds, I think you guys need to know that, Hey, Zeus works a regular job. He does his thing, and then he puts extra for the show for the hard luck show.
He crafts every post you see on Instagram, that is the work and delicacy and forthrightness and the golden touch of Instagram. Jesus, right? Yeah. That would be something because it could say, oh, but you know, he's single guys working two jobs. No, he's got family. So on top of all that first and foremost, he's a husband and a father.
Right? Get that. You guys, this guy's doing more before 10:00 AM, then most of you guys will get done in a full year. That's a hundred percent correct. And not only that, he's the, uh, unofficial sheriff of the hard luck show. Yes, sir. Right? Anybody's fucking biting. Anyone's fucking doing this, that and the other thing.
Oh, Hey, Zeus is right on him, bro. He's like, you know what? I see a biter he's over there. You guys ought to take a look at that, right? Hey Seuss. Where does that come from? Oh, just pay attention. I know I, you my, no, no. I was just, I was just still listening to what you're saying. I'm not just pay attention to see who's talking shit.
So I'm like, fuck. These fools asked if I started talking shit and I asked you guys me get. Right, right. My name is going to fuck with you. Yeah. We don't even play that arguing shit. Right? All your she'll get deleted and blocked. Right. I don't even allow somebody to say something halfway funky that could be perceived as something and your ass is done.
So watch what you say. One nice comments only. Right? So, Hey Zeus, tell us about your process and be honest, dude. Don't I know you're loyal to the show and we love that about you, but you're already in the inner sanctum. So you can be you brother, but there's like, you got to make a post three times a week, right?
Is it, is it difficult? What happens? What's your process? Um, it started getting a little easier now that I'm starting. I, when I watched videos, I tried to watch videos not to see work. It helps. To make them look a little better. Right? You hear that? People he'll go and he'll watch videos. Did you fucking see?
I'm just saying all right. All right. That's good. And then, Hey Zeus, do you ever know? Because sometimes I know we run through our day and it's like a Tuesday and something's got to drop on a Wednesday and it's like, Tuesday, 8:00 PM. You got to get up early and we haven't hit you with either the show copy or the pictures.
Do you ever think like, man motherfucker, I gotta go to sleep, like hurry up. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Sometimes I do trauma. Yeah, my . I need to get the shit done. So I got to get up early. He's like where the fuck's lucky I'll come in and prove this thing. Right? There's a whole process. And by the way, we moved it into slack in a sauna.
I'm gonna tell you what a standout guy. Hey, Zeus's right. We put it all in there and I'm like, Hey Zeus, we're going to throw the show copy in there when it dah, dah, dah. And then he's off his big Lux on slack yet. And I'm like, well, Schwartz is going to put them on there. And then Hayes was just like, listen until a big Lux is in slack.
I'm still gonna put it on the tech so he can see it. I was like, all right, bet. Right. Yeah. Hey, so what does your wife think about your participation in the show? Is she for it? Did she like, dude, you, you know, what the fuck are you doing now? She likes it. She thinks it's cool. Does she listen to the show? I, every once in a while, not too, not too often.
Not like, like I do, I listen to every episode. Right. How did that, w what is it about the show that got you hooked into it so much? Um, all the, cause the first thing I heard was I heard a step on Oreos name and that's what the very first episode, and that's what got me hooked onto it. Right. But then why didn't you run away?
Like, why didn't you like listen to three more episodes and be like, I'm getting the fuck out. No, cause it was dope. I liked what you guys were doing. And then it started getting a lucky story. And then, uh, when you guys started and then went left, key showed up that food, that food. That was funny. Yeah. Do you have a theory on, on where Lipkey is or what's going on?
Uh, going through a midlife crisis, I've tried to hit him up and he ignoring me. He must be still angry that wouldn't make a Instagram post. Hey, you see, you see everything panned out though. Yeah. You said you didn't need to make that post. That's telling them to slow the fuck down. See that's how cool Hey Zeus is, is he's like, listen, I got to make sure that, you know, the show is part of this and dah, dah, dah, dah.
Right. And that was good. Um, and you know, and maybe you can talk to Sean. There's a hidden episode. Uh, ghost episode, there's an actual ghost episode Schwartz. Is there really? Yeah, there is. There was an episode where, um, Hey, zoos talks about certain things and we go into real things and look at Shawn's look, Sean, please.
Why are you looking at me? So intensely, wonder what you're gonna say you are, aren't you the motherfucker. And the thing is, is, uh, it was so over the top, what went on that actually Sean told me like, For future generations. And we might not want to put that out. Do you remember that? No. Why do you never remember it?
You don't remember? Do you remember that Hayes? Who's told us that his sister-in-law oh yeah. Yeah. Steve is out. Remember he has a five-year-old son named Kuwait. Ooh. Remember that? No, but he remembers the imaginary friend, but you tell me what it needs to be reminded. He's married. He has a son. You telling me what the show is about.
And then I remember it. You remember that? And what was your counsel to us? Your counsel? Oh, blue eyes. Uh, yeah, it was insensitive. Yeah. Listen, we have a show that's out there in the ether and like, Hey, this is like, Hey man, I was on the show. We had a show where the fuck is that show. And I'm like, I don't know.
Hey juice. Did you think that what we talked about was insensitive or what did you think. Maybe a little, but, uh, just cause, cause I, I mean, I, I liked him, so I don't try to, like, I'm not trying to like doggy dinner or, you know, I'm not trying to talk shit on there. Oh, blue eyes or the no, no, no, no, my sister-in-law right.
No. And not to think that, um, that I have no anything because I'm not like that. I like them. They're cool people, you know? And then I don't care that what she did, you know? Right. It's the same person to me. That's right. Oh yeah. It is. No one knows what you're talking about and I can't even tell if it's better, we leave it like that.
Is it? Yep. Okay. Well, we got the, the word on high. It's better to leave it like that. Is there any time? Um, so you listened to the early shows. Have we changed that all on the show hinges? Have you changed. I remember the night. Let me just say this real quick. Before you say that, I didn't want to say I'm looking at it right now.
I remember the night that I was sitting in a parking lot in Santa Monica and I had called him back to talk about him. And this is before I told you I got, I think I have a guy that can help us with the posts. And we went back and forth with like left a messages. And so finally I was going to have a phone call with, Hey, Seuss to ask him, this is what I need.
Are you even down to do something like this, right? Yeah. And can you move that thing so I can see, Hey Suzy. Thanks. Pardon? Um, so a sous love fucking eyes in the backup liquor store right across from California chicken. Wilsher Santa Monica, but that little liquor store. Hey bro, I got you on your, like, you were like.
Oh, oh, I asked her, I said, I thought he was going to be like, what the fuck? But he's like, what really, really? Oh yeah. I'd be honored. Oh shit. Yeah. I want to do that, you know, and I asked him and I remember getting off the phone and telling you, man, I really think, you know, this guy, he might not know all the technical stuff yet, but he's really like, I think he's devoted.
And he, and he cares about the show. And man, that was already, how long ago was that? Two years now. Two years. Yes. I think in the summer, this coming summer, it will be two years. A year and a half ago. Yeah. He came down when we had the show in the other office, when we left, he came through. You think about how long ago.
Yes. Yeah. I saw those videos of him getting his book signed. Right. That thing might've gone up in value since left. He hit his midlife crisis.
Um, so what w okay, so about how did you find out about Hayes's Steve? Hey, Susan was following in it and he commented on the show and he was like doing little reposts of our show with little, like, uh, Motion graphics and stuff like that. You can repost our show up with all sorts of cool shit. And I was like, damn, if he could do this for our posts or anything close to it, be great.
Right. Hey, are you trying out, like, did you kind of know in the back of your mind that if you threw out some artsy fartsy shit that we might pick it up? No, I just thought I, I just liked the show and I thought it was dope. So I just did it cause I liked to show so other people here, even if they, it's not like I have a big following, you know, like I was reposting his reposts of the show.
Right. Because there was all sorts of like cool, funny shit. And I'm like, wow, man, this guy really takes time to repost our show. This ain't quick or easy. He does all this different shit. Right. Wonder how he does it. And, and it was kind of showing me that he was, he really liked the show. And so maybe art art is artistic or creative forces flow in his family.
Cause your brother's kind of an artist. Right. Yeah, he's a tattoo artist. He's actually, he's actually watching the show. He's just listening to you, right? Is he right? Right here, right on man. He sounded his brother. Make sure you don't say anything wrong. Yeah. I told him how to mute himself where he's going to have people find that tattoo.
Your tattoo brother. How you find him on, um, Hey, I'm here yourself. Oh, unmute yourself. Hey, how did they find your tattoo brother on Instagram? Yeah, but like what is this? Okay. Can you go see her? Yeah. Espinosa. Hey, Hey, self-made tattoos. Self-made tattoos. Hey Augie. Uh, do you have any, uh, since you're an artist, are you the older brother or the younger.
Okay. From a young man's perspective to this old dog, that's holding up the phone right now. Do you have any, uh, critiques or thoughts to give Hey Zeus, uh, regarding the post. Hey guys, we need to do a spot about family sounds. Family sounds. Family sounds. Yeah, man, they got a whole hookup hace one, as it works.
It's drug. Let me tell you they can do an hour long podcast about your memories, your history, your family. No way. Yeah. Yes. Way family sounds team. They have not only do they assemble a guys that have extensive experience in recording podcasts and editing them, right? Like seal team six, but for podcasts, but they also will use your family's voices to learn more about family sense.
Please visit www family-sounds.com backslash your unique code,
big loss. And man, you want to find out more about family sounds, visit www dot fam. Dash sound's dot com backslash lucky 17. That's our unique code. That's our unique code. That's our unique code there. You got, we are unique code family. Sounds your memories in a podcast. No, uh, he usually will show me a little preview and that sums up everything.
I think he's doing great from my cell phone to now doing it on the iPad. You can see the difference and stuff. He's making you guys look good. Yeah, that's right. Straight right on. Um, so Hey Zeus, how have you seen the show developed over the time that you've been listening? Um, however, um, well, yeah, from a perspective from you, we want to hear kind of from somebody who's not here in the recordings every week, right?
Your perspective, because you're still in this yet you sit a different place in a different state, in a different state. How, how has it changed or what's happening with the show and what are some things you can share with us? Some insights you've had over the last year now? I think, I think it's gotten even better than what it was like.
It was always good. You know, that's why I was hooked on to it, but I just think, I think you guys been doing a lot more like dope. The only thing I wish I was, I wish there were a little longer that's it. But yeah. Do you do, does anyone in your family has listened to the show and they don't like it?
They're like, fuck that show. No, cause it's just me. It was just me and my brother to listen. And then the family cause my parents, you know, they, they don't, they don't listen to podcasts, but your wife, does she ever say those guys are sexist? No. She, she likes actually listening to you when you do your lawyer.
Really like, yeah. She likes listening to you talk, uh, talking to your lawyer stuff. I remember I'll remember that one episode. When you guys did you guys, there was an opening, I think, uh, we shop and you called out that security and security guy. Remember that guy? I do. Yeah. Sean was there and then you were talking shit to him.
Cause he thought he knew at all. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Yeah. She, she likes to hear your opinions on shit like that at Schwartz. Does your wife, when she listens to the show and I know she likes some of it and I know she probably doesn't. Is there anything that she doesn't like, she's not feeling, I dunno.
Yeah. Any, any, any wrong word, man. I got a, I hear about it, but she said she's a listener. Um, I don't know, man, I gotta be honest with you. I kinda tune it out because I just don't want to, I just don't want to hear it, man. I do that. I do that sometimes with my wife. Like sometimes I know my wife is going to say certain things, right.
And I know I can't fight it. So I'll be like, I'll just sit there and I'll be practicing like an inner peace. I'll be like, I just won't engage. Okay. You know what? This is just a natural force, like a waterfall. It's just a bubbling Brook and I'll just stand there and just be like, huh? Yeah, yeah. You're right.
Yeah. I get women that there's women that probably isn't show that hate my guts. They know exactly where I stand. I texted in. One of them did and say gave you a, uh, who was that? I mean, I can't say who it was, but I recall somebody and you were like, oh mother fucking cry, baby. But I used to go out. CRO really somebody called you or she sent you a text call and texting, bothering me, crying, Jesus, immediates crying all the time.
I get a call every fucking couple of years from this idiot lying about their life. Anyways. Hopefully I never hear from this human being again. But yeah, I'm saying that because some, some of those women out there know exactly where I stand. Go ahead. Blue eyes, blue eyes. Has your wife ever, never listened to the show?
Not one episode ever. She knows where you're at on Saturday, right? She does believe that there is a podcast, right? He knows this. There was a podcast. As a matter of fact, when we were at Christmas, my, uh, father John Ritter, Scott Scott was like, oh, you know, they talk about you on the show sometimes to do.
And she's talking about me on the show. It's just the regular stuff like that. She doesn't listen to the show. I would prefer my wife not listen to the show. I mean, she listened to this better. That's great. That's great. I wouldn't want my wife listening, speak, speaking your show. My wife listens to the show and sometimes I get a thumbs up and sometimes we get a thumbs up the asshole.
Right. But I just take it. I'm like whatever. And you know what she got on there. And um, what were we just talking about? Where she listened to the, oh, she was the one though. She listens to the show and she gives a lot of suggestions. Right? She's the one that says, Hey, your wife was on the show. What show?
Oh, oh, it's funny. You asked that. What do you mean? Listen, yesterday two days ago, my wife and I did a podcast today. We were asked by this company called what's up prenup. Now look at Schwartz. That's dope. Listen, Schwartz. You see what just happened there? And I'm not doing this to make fun of you at all.
Right. Much respect, but why is that funny? Hayes's why? Why is it funny? Cause he was giving. Yeah, I'm always giving a shit this time. I'm not giving him shit, but this time, but short. Yeah. So you see how Sean and I had a conversation off the air, right? Yeah. And we talked about a podcast and then you said your wife was just on a thing and I picked up, oh, okay.
He's throwing to me that we should probably talk about, I wasn't actually I was actually talking about your wife was on this potluck. Yeah. Oh, to set up the prodo episode right now, misread. No I did. But you were signaling something wrong. Listen, I'm going to it. Now you were on this. You want to talk about the podcast listeners don't know is that there's all sorts of signaling preempted strikes.
Like there's all these different dynamics and skin NAMIC static going on in this room that are invisible to the naked eye. If you listen, though, you can hear the tones chain up and down like a dog. Can, you can direct them without saying anything right now. Now, listen, everybody. I'm not to single anybody out it like a normal laugh, but it was, oh, no, it wasn't.
But the thing is, and I'm not gonna signal this out to anybody, but let's, let's just let. I read something off a Sean, it wasn't correct, but I read it just the same, but I was running with it right. To drive the show, some fucking energy that's right. Put some goddamn energy in the show. All right. And when it turns out that I'm wrong, right?
I threw it back to Sean. I had no guarantee. He fucking, he, he wasn't trying to, but he told me, Nope, you're wrong. I was talking about this. Now we got two topics set up that we can go to. That's how to fucking conversations work, especially microphone magic. Well, that's how you make it sound real because it is real.
And two is, that's how you keep the energy and the material going. So I'm going to put it to you. Oh, blue eyes. Who, which one do you want to do? Don't ask me, decide. Do you want to go prodo? I want you to talk about the podcast first and then we'll go into the, my, my part. Okay. See that. So pretty quick. Go ahead.
What happened to murder machine part two, we never did it. We never fucking did it. We did. No. I was listening to it the other day and I was like, I'm wondering what happened to Tam. All right. All right. So for the dynamics in the room, when Steve looks over at Schwartz and then nods his head like that, that means, okay.
That's when we got put on the list, right? Thank you. Did I read that right? Yes, sir. So my wife and I got pulled on a podcast. Okay. So it's called hello prenup, which is an international company that does like, not international national, what they do. They write, they help people write prenups for people that are about to get married.
Okay. Right. That was a, that was an old blue eyes. You guys do prenups. Yeah, we do. We, in fact, no, you were asking if they did a prenup, right. If you do a prenup who? My wife and I. No, we did not ask him. Was that what you were asking? So why would they come to you guys to do for prenups though? Because we're right, right.
Well, we're attorneys. When we do specialize in that we do a lot of family law. We do a lot of probate stuff. So sometimes companies come to us to review the contracts, to give the sign off. Okay. Hello. Hello, prenup. In fact, when I was on shark tank, this company blew up and we're one of the people that helps them evaluate certain contracts, right?
They have as part of their marketing platform, a podcast called hello prenup, right? My wife is part of whatever, networking, bullshit. I don't know what it is, but in somehow they came into contact through that too. And the lady that runs a podcast asked us to be on the podcast got Thursday. Gotcha. So fan fucking tastic fan fucking tastic because this company.
It's giving counseling to people who are about to get married. Right? And here we are two attorneys already married with a kid we're in business together. Like everything you're not supposed to do, we're doing right. And we don't have a prenup. And then also we would walk in to talking about probate and trust and all of the other stuff.
And because of this show, because of the hard luck, and by the way, I told them about the hard luck show on that podcast, that host was so stoked because she had to do very little work, very little work in order to get the conversation in the whatever's out. Right. So my wife and I were able to do stuff.
In fact, my wife has certified yoga. Yogi. I don't know why every woman in California becomes a certified yoga. Shaun you're nodding your head. Why? Because my wife's a yoga too. Right. They all want to be a fucking certified Yogi. Right. And then, you know, I asked her what's the w w what does, what's the connection between yoga.
And litigation. And my wife, uh, was not prepared for that conference. That question was, although she'd been married to me for a long time, and I said, and she said, you have to breathe. And then we took it off from there and was fucking great. But the point of the matter is, is because of this show, we're on 2 63, the lady that gets paid for corporate podcast, it blew her mind that we have 263 or 65 episodes in the short amount of time that we do she's paid and she's in a corporate gig and they're only dropping one a week.
And part of that has to do with opening up the flood gates and allowing the material to come through and, uh, not to be too precious about every single moment, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And that's the story of that podcast now? Oh, blue eyes to you. Right. And so that, wasn't your wife's first podcast rights.
She was on the hard luck show. Right. And if you haven't heard. We've been talking about the protal episodes mixed tape for the last couple of weeks, at least. Um, so I want to play your wife's first appearance. I do. I have a clip of it. Am I going to get in trouble? Who knows? So let me set it up, set it up.
This guy is so smart. He pulls this shit out after I make this big statement about being unguarded and open. Now I have to live by that. Yeah. Let me set this up. Okay. We're doing a show. This is way early. So what number? Oh, what the fuck. This is no, this isn't even a number. This is before one. This is the prodo episodes, man.
This is the shit that we recorded before we released anything. Why were we doing that? We're trying to gather him mentor. We got together and we started to record and like a bunch of this shit we never released. Wow. So you get to hear it. All right. So let me just. Alright, we're recording shows and in wa at his law office in Costa Mesa, right?
The first office and in walks this girl, and she's a intern, right? No, she's not even an answer. She's going to interview to be an intern. It was her day of the interview. It was their day of the interview. So she walks in and there's a bunch of dudes recording, fucking, and he's like, Hey, do you mind sitting down and recording?
Not just any dudes. Right? I mean, it's Rick, Steve. It's like all of that. Like what? This does not look anything like a law firm Diablo or somebody else was there. Right. Right. Let me play this clip. He was there. Did you? Oh yeah, please.
But how are you with stress? I'm very good with stress. It just pushes me to be very aggressive. And my awesome. How did you become good at stress? Like, did you have stressful issues or like, so, um, so I played softball for a very, very, very long time. What position I was center field. And I played when I was like in middle school and then I started to travel ball and that's what I committed my life to travel ball.
What the hell is travel ball like they're dedicated to the sport. So the voice you're hearing in the background is ed bueno. Oh, Matt side. K by the way, mats on the outs with ed bueno, fucked up mother fucker. Every day, I'm going to practice every Saturday and Sunday. I miss prom. I miss softball. Yeah. Hold leash.
That's king sale, dude. That was right around the time that kink sat. Listen, I almost said I don't give a fuck. King Sam and made the mistake. He didn't even know Steve and king salmon towards, he was like, Hey, Hey, it seems like, Hey motherfucker. Really? Yeah. That's a true story. He's like telling me fucking.
Dude. I'd never seen a scared salmon. So scared of that dude, he was like, huh? I didn't say nothing, sir. He really did. Is your dad really into softball?
enough about your softball? Let's talk about your dad. Was your dad really into sticks and both. Did he own the woods? Dad? Are they in the south? Is your dad a catcher or a pitcher? No, I just, I was, I was thinking that her dad was one of those obsessive like softball fans. Your dad liked her brush off home.
Anyway, because you do that. Your dad got into third base. Oh, hold on a second. Here comes the partner. Oh, look at her face. She look at, she's not looking at all the monitors a smile. I see the smile. Hi Lily. Yes. Look at that face shy. Can you describe that face for me?
She just, we did the interview. Are you going to do you don't have to get on mic. Are you going to get on the micro now? No. Okay. Lily, Lily, Lily. Thank you. Thank you, Lily hours and the case. Oh, my God. I'm dead, dude. I was lazy,
dude. I'm dad. I gotta go. She was going to kill me. I have a young lady in here. It's not that she hates it when I'm, when I'm what she doesn't want me to give the wrong, like tone to the system. She wants everyone to snap to attention. She thinks this is going to be fun time. Did you see that face, dude?
That's the first she was like, I thought I was grounded. I thought we were all going to get in here. Did you hear the, if it was like, yes, she said, ma'am you hear that? Ma'am my wife got a man. Listen, let me tell you. Wow, bro. So, Hey, what happened to the fallout of that? There was none. I talked to her and she said, first of all, you guys got to remember.
I, okay. Wait short, has your wife giving you shit yet about not being rich after. A little bit blue eyes, did you watch say shit like, Hey, they don't even pay you money. Right. And so that was, at that time, my wife was like, Hey, like, what is this? That was at the beginning. I mean, now she buys the whole fucking thing.
She sees it all, bro. She's behind a thousand percent. But back then, all she knew is she had a fucking jokey as gap to the husband who had all of his cronies around a table, on a microphone and was interviewing chicks. Like, so where's that going? Sunny man look like, uh, any kind of business to me. Right. So that's where that was.
So, but the fallout wasn't that, that heavy, I just told her and I kept on it. And now she's a fucking supporter of the highest magnitude high magnitude she is. I mean, Steve, what do you think you're listening to all this? This is the early days. I'm kind of curious to your perspective. I think it's funny. I think we see.
Different. I think we've gotten so much better. It's but it's funny. Cause we didn't know what we were doing in the beginning. We were just fucking doing, Hey, I'm Schwartz. You kind of came on when we got into third gear or whatever it is. What did you, what did you think of this prodo episode? Like what observations?
Oh, I thought it was, I thought it was fucking hilarious, man. Um, it sounds like old, you know what I mean? Like it sounds you guys are definitely more polished, more cohesive, you know, uh, simpatico, all that shit, but it sounds fresh and new and you know, like, uh, yeah, I mean, you can actually visualize like how dogged out you got like easily, you know, like your wife came in, she didn't say it, but she was like, who is this bitch right here?
You know, I don't know what she looked like. I wasn't there, but you could, you could hear that. Sean, you know, what do you, what goes on for you? What observations do you make here in that there was no structure? No, um, I don't know. I think we understand the roles a little bit better and, uh, you know, we get to the point and you know, now we have an intro and that sort of thing, there's a total structure to is, uh, um, yeah, back then, it was just like a free for all.
You could hear everybody just talking and chime in and that sort of thing. And then look, I mean, it was so free that a fucking someone came in to interview for a role. I'm sorry. And we just put her on Mike right away. That was where my attitude was at that time was like, fuck it, whatever happens. Let's fucking go.
We brought in a homeless guy one time. We did. Do you remember that? That guy was scoping? That guy was sleeping. Underneath the window, right. Of my office. Yeah. And we brought that dude in, gave him some water. All right. You know, that's a lot, I think for pot. Well, Hey, Zeus, what do you think about that?
You've been with, you've been with it since Esteban Oriel. So this is pre Esteban. What are your thoughts on what we just listened to? What we just listened to? Yeah. It sounded all that kind of sounded like, whoa. Like nobody really knew what they were doing. I guess it meant that now you guys are, everything is more clear and like yeah.
More organized, you know what I mean? But even, but even the first episodes were good though. At least I think they were for the Stefan and everything I did too. I think they sounded good. Yeah. I think they always sounded good bite. I think, I just think they sounded a little more clear nowadays. Before, you know, I I'm going to say this.
I was listening to that and I was listening to just how fresh and almost instantaneous the reactions were. Do you know what I mean? Like it wasn't canned and I can I personally, and maybe I'm nuts, but I can hear in there, like the definite personalities and also the emotional ism in the room. I think that's what separates like a run of the mill podcast from one that's more engaging is that you're getting an actual sensitive feeling or the attitude, or like the emotional, like temperature of the room.
You're getting a sense of that. That's what I got from that. The other piece I got from that was like, wow, that was a lot of kinks. It was, yeah, he was like, there's more. Is there play another one playing another one. You want me to play a king salmon clip or, or a lucky Steve, whatever you want. Hey, juice.
You want to hear a Prado episode with lap? Big lap. Yeah, lip. All right, let's go. And oh, blue eyes. All right. Lucky. My cousin is the best and loves corn hole. Ooh, nah, that ain't good.
That ain't good.
That ain't good. Confusion. Confusion. Hey, your cousin, your cousin's, uh, nails matched the matched the, um, Starbucks cup the other day. That's true. That's true. All right, go ahead. Let her out. Ooh, not good. Did you hear that? You know what they're saying? They say, if you flip your flop telling you the cornhole in bro, that means something all different from where I came from.
Right? I mean, we just got done talking about being in Plaza.
like, you play, you play like there's a dozens and then there's the cornhole. You play that corner shit up in the pan. Something's happening, man. Okay. Well, why don't you just straight up asking for, let's see. What do you think? Hormone corn hole. All right. All right. Seeing that I'm a little bit advanced now than mature.
I know that it might not be the same thing they come on. Don't listen. We're not looking for, you know, Senator we're looking for the truth. Is that a sport? Let's say don't do that. What is cornhole and mean to you? Of course, for real, don't bullshit. It's a, something on the backside. What does that mean?
That's the regular,
that's direct though. Something on the back side. What does that mean? That's the rectum now? Steve, what are you thinking? I, he thought the same thing I thought when I heard the corner, I said, I thought, I mean, I think everyone pouring shit.
Uh, what do you got? Anything else I've been there? I do. I got one more. This is, this is, uh, just to set the stage. This is a w at one point we were going to do, Matt was going to come in every week. Oh, a show air mail, air mail with ed bueno, bueno, bueno, every day. Wayno all day. It was a whole podcast, a whole podcast.
There's gotta be some right. And in fact, my cousin claims to be the most interviewed cornhole bagger. Oh, that's what he was talking about with interviews, dude. He's got like 11. I know. I remember him saying that that's funny. And so we were trying to, and Steve really kind of wasn't feeling it. Like we were like, Hey, we could do like a podcast channel underneath it all.
And it was my cousin. And then, you know, this guy's really passionate. And so we were like, let's just give it a trial. And then we, so we were trying to make him his own theme music and that sort of thing. And by then Steve was asleep on the other room. He'd given up on this whole bullshit. Cause we board him out of this.
We Boyd that dude. Right. So we coached him on how to do a, there was a coaching. Right. But you know, Matt couldn't commit to it. He had like prior, well, he was going to
like that guy, come on, does the funniest thing I've ever, let me, let me play. Even partners, all that boy anymore. Right? Well that's because he built like a dragon. Uh, sales booth and Eduardo walked by it and didn't acknowledge all the hard work in making the dragon, but he had put in pictures of dragons and rugs and he had gold, fake gold coins and goblins and goblets.
He was, he was like, come into my dungeon lamb by some dragon bag,
like the comic book world, bro. Like, listen, if it, you know what they say, if you flip your flat pictures of the booth, I do. Oh, I want it. Oh dude. He went out. He, he had to finance that. All right. Let me put
Matt matches. Get, look at matches. Gave Wayne on the look like, look, motherfucker. I got this follow my lead. Right. Matt just gave him the look like I know what's up. Follow my lead motherfucker. Are you ready? Look at his face. I wish people could. We gotta get cameras to get cameras in here. Matt, are you ready?
I'm ready. I was born. Ready. Are you scared? Fuck. Yeah. Why? Don't be scared to model a little fear. Not around the fear. Oh, edgy, easy going on the edge. Hey, here we go. Listen. All your dreams are about to come shoot. You do this right. You guys will be swimming in beer and weed and cornhole bags. All right.
Are you guys on this or what? Ready? All right. And we're not running some fucking loose lips ship around here. Some serious shit. Your big pumpkin. That fucker. Come on. All right, here we go. Everyone. Calm the fuck down and let's get this. Ready and
stop. Stop. Stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop stuff, Matt. The look on your face was crazy. Did you want me to come in? I wasn't sure. Let me know. I know. I don't know when I'm coming in. So it's your call. Okay. My call. Okay. Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. Okay. Listen for everything. You never done this before.
You were going to say very nipples. You ain't gotta, you got, where do we go from there? Oh, we go way into him trying to do the intro and he does like an okay job. And then we coach him some more and then he does it again. Yeah. I mean, I could, I don't have the whole episode, like pull it up right now. I feel like we should at least hear his first taco or something.
Do you know? He was like, from here I come. Oh no. Okay. The first one, remember he does it in that like radio voice
no, no, no, no, no. He was like, Hey, good, everybody get out there. You need to have to do. And we get to fucking do some limping and debit and ripping. Here we go. summer. We're coming with that first I'm here. Steam with the first cut is be ready. Take it away digitally. That's true. Do we have those? We do. Can we play one?
Why? Because if you want to hear it, you don't have to tell. Let's tell let's turn it. Let's try it. Okay. Hey, Zeus. What do you think? What do you think that'd be cousin Jeff? Yes.
I don't know, but yeah. I always feel like he just bushes, like Eli's a lot period. Right? Well, shit. You heard it here first. That's probably like the hardest thing against anybody I've ever heard. Hey, Zhou say anything, right? The guys kind thing about everybody was never met a man. He didn't like right. And then he's just like, man, I don't know about that guy.
What was the show? Who Frodo episode? Yeah, this show what my name? No. Let me tell you my name. Prato episodes early days. Hey, thank you. I assume. And it was also thanks as juice. Instagram, G. Coming to old Walmart near you. Hey, Hey, Zeus. Uh, what's the name of your, your brother's, uh, Instagram handle? Uh, Augie Espinosa at self-made tattoos.
All right. And, uh, how else can people get in touch with you if they want to do anything with the show or do whatever with me? Because my Instagram, but I ain't fucking with nobody else.
we're going to make you famous partner. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck everybody. All right. Good. Hey, thank you as sous. And uh, we give them a shout out to everybody. We're going to be doing our drawing. Yep. Next up sir. Uh, listen, listen to hard luck show. Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays. Go by the art of war audio. And, uh, yeah, www har R supermax hardware.com.
Go check us out, make a purchase and what you guys shot. Uh, hard luck show.com hard luck show.com hard luck show.com and a crime mix tape proto episodes coming soon. So that's what we just listened to what we just listened to your four. Oh, way more. And there's, I mean, we're talking lots of episodes to mine.
It's like eight episodes or something. Yeah, it's crazy. And there's bits and pieces and all this other shit. It's crazy. You listened to some ass. Wow. And then on top of that art of war it's out, it's already out or go get it. You got, did you get. Yeah. I've been listening to it. Um, I'm barely on, on chapter six, but that shit, that shit dope.
Yeah, man, my brother has been listening to, what is your brother say? He likes it. You want him? He's right here. Yeah. Let's get your brother out here. We want a real review if you don't get on full. Yeah. They kept me up pretty much on that. I listened to it
two nights in a row. I finished it. So I started again second. Yeah. From your perspective, what makes it so good, man? Um, not understanding the, the writing, but then you guys make it all make sense right after it's said, you know what I mean? Like.
Right, right. Some of the writings. Yeah. Well, that's great to hear that. That's a big reason why we do it. Bigger reason. Best review we got yet. Yeah. I, I don't, I mean, I got to tell you, uh, crying, his eyes got all welled up with tears when he heard that. And you know why? I don't tell you why man, because you know, we don't know what he's going to say.
Right. We, we believe in the product. So we're like, I'm sure he's going to like it, but what's he going to say? But then what he actually said to us was that it helped him understand that thing. And that's a form of teaching or education and that's a real service to somebody. I mean, it's service to mankind.
That's what we're going to be a lot more than that, bro. We're going to be doing a lot more than that. So I believe in. Yeah, that's what I like about it too. Cause you guys break down all the H word. I like it. And I like how you guys have that little, uh, the drums and the music behind when you guys are talking about, I think, I think every one of our episodes, if you were to listen to every single episodes are without fail, there is, uh, some stuff to pick up and learn.
I know that because I know that we share that in each of our, each of our episodes, there's something to be learned. This last episode, I learned something and like we do about adios, Amigos.
Oh, boy, he shit on himself.
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