The Important Questions

Happy Monday to the pathetic office drones who need a podcast to help ease the pain (this is me). Episode 102 is here, proving once and for all that we're not just big losers coming back to drop one episode years later. And we have four topics that are solidly decent for you.

1) What would you do if you woke up to Hitler giving you a BJ?

2) Do you wash your legs in the shower?

3) What would be the onomatopoeias experienced in everyday life if life were like a comic book?

4) What is the line between cute and cringe when it comes to pet ownership?

Like us on page. Donate to money. Needing money a lot now.

1.5 years of no uploads isn't enough to make us lose our entire fanbase, right? RIGHT? Well we had some life changes so cut us some slack. We're still just as incredibly stupid as ever. Smitty draws today's art in real time to give Rico something to spank to later.

Here's the topics this week.

1) Why are you the bad guy if you get upset publicly over somebody else's smell?

2) How can Rico use his newly birthed child in exploitative ways?

3) Would you befriend or date a floating and sentient pair of boobs?

4) What job is better after two beers?

Our Patreon is still active and we would love to convince you to throw us money as we venture into getting Smitty a better microphone (coming next episode, btw). We're not sure when bonus content is returning or if we're still resetting the show, BUT that's all a part of following our dumb asses.

Also - new text/voicemail line - shoot us a stupid goddamn message at 708-433-9153.

The 2nd demo of our attempt at a reboot series. And again, can't go without those sweet tropes of ours.

Topics:

1) How do you spend your time in the 2 week notice period of quitting a job?

2) What are the worst minor injuries?

3) What are the best sci-fi tropes?

4) Would you wear the Lord of the Rings ring if it made you invisible but Smiegel appeared by you every time you wore it?

Follow us or something.

Back before Dave and Scott decided to pack their bags and go cross country, abandoning Smitty and Rico, they were in the works to create a new show called The Circle Jerkwads. The show was to be Important Questions adjacent but without some of the same tropes. I think the lesson is that those tropes worked for a reason, and we were wrong to abandon them. Are you satisfied is the greatest way to end every topic. Full stop.

Topics:

1) What TV shows have you seen too much of despite it being awful?

2) What are some creative ways to address the wage gap?

3) Would you go to space if the conditions were right?

4) If you woke up suddenly 5 years in the future, how would you respond?

This is where I'd put to follow us. But as of right now, I'm not sure if that matters. You still can if you want.

Hello special bozos. Here's some good shit just for you for the first time. So be gentle ;)

Lightning Round style episode with 8 questions for just those who think we're worth something.

1) What is the weirdest reason to give someone a discount on a product?

2) How can we make more effective communication with sweatpant ass words?

3) How much influence could you have dressed as Ronald McDonald in a McDonalds?

4) What is the most overused movie trope?

5) What causes people to choose between ass and tits?

6) How can be make the DMV more tolerable?

7) What would be the best next step in human evolution?

8) How would you argue in favor of incest?

See ya next month, bozos.

In this month's bonus episode, the guys look back at their first episode and tear it to shreds.

In honor of your money, Smitty lays down some erotic words over smooth jazz instrumentals.

I love you.

For your listening pleasure - here's our best words thrown into our worst stories.