Your Mom was right about standing up straight, 1 in 3 of us are into the stars, ChatGPT is spitting facts about your looks, bring the roids to Vegas and today we celebrate the brisket!

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Cereals are getting worse, we're not paying for the food we financed (lol, wut?), pennies are out, hurricanes are in!

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It's Memorial Day weekend and I just got paid. Every second I spend writing a description here is one more second I'm not enjoying a cold beer so here is your description, have a safe weekend!

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Using coupons is sexy now, Sprite has a new Summer drink that sounds awful, toss your cukes and you better bring something to the cookout!

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Sleeping 8 hours may kill you, Miller Lite is running back a classic from last Summer, Sonic hates making out, and we will go anywhere for some good eats

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We have a new ranch flavor headed our way, 9 hours of sleep is too bad, it's summer of scaling back and Wendy's is coming with the heat....

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Dark chocolate could replace your meds, we're self-reporting an F in a couple of areas, Naples it tops and today the Summer Bucket List is due!

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Our water is about to get worse, the streets are gonna be packed for Memorial Day, overdoses are down, fighting with kids is up!

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Eggs are coming back down...sorta, pizza is still the king, chimps wipe, Kellogg's is killing your chances at custody and NASA wants us on Mars soon!

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Porn may be outlawed entirely, Wingstop has a new jam, golf life could end your life early, some people love to be thrash talked and West Virginia.....is fat. 

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