Keywords: COVID19, stress management, mindset

Hashtags: #resilience, #timemanagement, #journaling

Most of the time, our mood is set on what the day gives us. And it can be very depressing at times especially during this time of pandemic where a lot of people are affected. But you can choose to not let the day control you. You control your day you control it by shifting your mindset.  Don’t let your day ruin your whole mood and remember that you’ve gone through worse and this is just another challenge.

We Are In This Together

04:17

Know that people are praying and to the best of our ability, we are still holding on and you're not alone. It may feel like you are but just know that we are here and so many people are praying, coming together, and rallying together to see what we can do together. Together we stand, together we overcome and there’s strength in numbers than doing things on our own.

Normalizing How You Feel

05:20

Everything that you’re experiencing is normal. Normalize your situation and how you feel. You're not crazy and please don't guilt yourself. Do not diagnose yourself. I want you to normalize your feelings. The first step is to normalize your feelings and deciding on what you can do and what you can control. Start normalizing your thoughts and feelings because it's not expected for you to have all the answers and know what to do.

Changing Things Up to Get a Different Result

10:03

Change things up to do things differently to get a different result. And the way you change things up to get a different result is your mindset. You have to change your thinking and your practice.

Being an example for others

12:27

Some people are following you and checking you out so if anything, make sure that you now control up so that other people can control up too because you're controlling up.

Helping your Mood

17:33

Being able to help your own mood out and have you feel like you're in control will give you the momentum and that boost to do more and be able to see the outlook or the outcome in a different way than how you have been looking at the outcome.

Remember Your Resilience

19:29

You still have something that you’re holding on to that you didn't realize and that is your resilience. You have been through things before in the past. Remember what you've been through and how you got out. You may not even realize or recognize to remember how you got out but you did get out and you were able to survive and thrive from there. So remember what you have done and what you learned from back then when you had challenging moments where you didn't know if you were going to survive it but you did.

Reasons Why You Should be Chronicling

22:15

You'll be able to look back to this whole experience when you thought that you couldn’t survive this and you going to see what things you have done so that you can apply that for the next big thing that we're going to deal with in phase.

22:29

It’s going to help those who are ahead of us or not ahead of us. you'll have something to give to them and for them to follow.

How You Want to Be During This Time of COVID-19

25:50

Shift your mindset and make a decision that you want to feel better, be good, and be happy. Don’t let this control your life, your mindset, and everything about you. Start getting back to your routine and do what feels good for you. You don’t have to wait until this blows over for you to get back to business as usual.

14:52

“Control your day. Don’t let your day control you.”

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Keywords:  inner peace, positive, control

Hashtags: #focus, #socialmedia,

Did you experience something in the past that made you feel that you want to give up but you didn’t. That’s resilience. You are strong. Ask yourself now if you are ready to give up. It’s okay to be tired and weak because we are all in this together. But always keep fighting on. You are not alone. Remind yourself that you have gone through worse and you can get through this. Listen to Dr. Sarah’s words of wisdom and encouragement.

Words of Encouragement

06:50

Trust and believe that this is a battle with your mind. It may be physically attacking you, emotionally attacking you. But if your mind is clear, guarded, and strong, you really won't have anything to mess with that. Because once your mind is taken, the rest of you follows.

07:36

Find ways to stay in control. Instead of focusing on what you cannot control or what's going on in the media. Focus on what you can control. Control what you can and have the wisdom to know the difference. Have the courage to control or to change what you can.

08:38

Focus on what you want to see as a result in your life right now. Instead of looking at what you don't want, look at what you do want. It’s about a shift and getting in a position, posture, and attitude. And a stance for the sake of your mindset, your family, and for people that you're caring for. It’s about you being able to be fortified and strengthened by getting focused. Not going distracted all the time but to settle yourself that will actually play in part with you being in control. Focus on what you want to see happen as a result.

09:25

Stay positive. Do your best to find things that are going to help you remain positive. Do the type of things that can make you smile or whatever can make you happy or can shift and disrupt the flow of what's been going on. Do that because that is you being in control.

Staying in the present and accept the past

17:22

Stay in the present. Think of the past as the freshmen and think of the future as anxiety. Why the world are you looking at the past of what you did not do or what you didn't get ready for? Why are you looking at the past? The past is over. It will never happen again to you. Why stay in the past? And the future not going to happen yet.

Drawing towards Social Media

18:35

We're already at a place or state of panic. Why do you want to continue to add what I found working with people for over 25 years is that we love drama. We seem to draw towards drama. We are always on social media trying to see what the latest drama is.

Maintaining Peace

19:32

Don't go into the past. It's depression. is depressing. Don't go in the future because it hasn’t happened yet. That's anxiety. You're worried about things that you can't even control because it never happened. Stay in the Present.

Reminding Yourself

20:22

You are in control, you are focused, and you are positive. Make sure that you say that to yourself, those three affirmations every time and anytime that you need to. Remind yourself that you are resilient. And just stay in the present. You're gonna be just fine. You made it through so many other things .

Key Quotes:

00:51

“We all connected. And it is about now sharing a common voice, a common theme, a common posture, position, attitude.”

10:29

“God always sends a reminder.”

11:07

“Remain in control. Focus, be positive, because remember you are resilient.”

21:08

“Don't focus on what you cannot change, focus on what you can. Don’t focus on what you cannot control, focus on what you can.”

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Keywords: Opportunity, Time Management, Resilience

Hashtags: #adversity, #resilience, #covid19

How do we overcome COVID-19? How do we rise up to the adversities that hinder us to grow? There are a lot of things to consider and one of them is to know you truly are. Knowing yourself can be a big step to overcome not only COVID but the adversities of life as well. And knowing yourself can push you to get control back into your life.

The Word “Pivot”

01:14

Pivoting is like shifting. I think that we are at a place everyone that we've been shifting long enough, that we've been pivoting long enough that, we've been avoiding long enough because that's why we don't know what the heck to do concerning this pandemic.

Taking Advantage of Opportunities

07:24

Take advantage of this time to make a decision if you want to continue to be the victim or if you're going to make a decision to do something different to get a different result and the way that you get a different result is you have to think differently. Otherwise, you're gonna keep getting the same thing and keep repeating this test. Wake up and see this thing for what it is beyond the distractions.

09:50

Take advantage of the opportunities that are best for you by making a decision to do so that you want the long term effects and No longer the distractions, the avoidance, playing victim, and short term effects. It's time for healing and deliverance. It is really time for us to really be our true selves like no other dreams that you had that you thought that you could never make happen.

Starting with Yourself to Make a Decision

13:12

Make a decision to not play the victim. Make a decision to get your control back and start gaining control back off of this situation. You make a decision to get to know who you are because It all starts with you and the bottom line and the answer to your questions as to why are you feeling this way? why is this happening? what's going on? Because it's about you.

Deciding to Make a Difference

14:39

You can decide to be here and stay here the way that you are or you take advantage of knowing who you are, what you possess, and what do you have to offer to humanity. That you show up and be available even when you think that you have nothing to offer. Even if you downplay, don't have enough confidence in yourself, or think that you can't make a difference. Start telling yourself that those are lies. You get to get to know the truth when you start to decide.

Resilience and Seeking the Truth

23:06

Hold on to your resilience. Remember that you have resilience but you won't know that unless you really get to know who you are.

Rising above and overcoming COVID

25:18

Get your control back. You have to accept the things that you cannot change, have the courage to do or set what you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

25:57

Accept that there are certain things that you can't control. You may not be able to control certain things so accept the things you cannot change and the things you cannot control.

Focusing on things you can control

26:56

When you put yourself in a position to control, that gives you the momentum, the power, the enlightenment, the insight, the awareness, and the hope to get to the other side. So make a decision and get to know who you are. Take the time to know what this is saying to you.

10:38

“In greatest adversity, there's a great opportunity. And our greatest adversity is this great opportunity.”

20:33

“The greatest adversity breeds the greatest opportunity.”

28:10

“Together we stand, together we overcome.”

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· Keywords: winner, decisions, adversity

· Hashtags: #inspirational, #personaldevelopment, #resilience

Why do you keep on losing against your competitors and yourself? Is it because of the lack of self-esteem? Self-confidence? Unsure of your capabilities? You can do better than being a negative thinker. You have always been amazing,  Others might say their opinions about you, but in the end, it is still you who will be the sole decision maker of your existence. Let this be a guide to you on how to prove against the people who doubted you and position yourself to win.

Our voice matters

06:25

We need to use this moment as an opportunity to bring awareness that racism still exist.

06:57

I am so grateful that many of us are now raising our voices. I am acknowledging your contribution in any platforms you prefer. You may not have the social media influence to speak your voice but sharing this video out is getting the word out. You can be proud of yourself in what you are doing and never discredit it if you feel like it is small compared to others.

Focus on ourselves, not on others

08:01

It is one thing to study your competitor’s behavior and be calculating, but it is another thing to compare then hate. When you hate, you are stuck because you are too busy being upset at yourself.

09:41

There is no need for us to compare ourselves to one another. We all are our own unique beings and we all complement each other. We are all pretty much equal and the same and that is what we are asking right now and we are not taking no for an answer.

Gearing ourselves to win

11:54

It is one thing for us to advance through above and beyond, we tried to avoid and deflect situations we don’t want to face. But to tell you the truth, it is in adversity where we find opportunity.

12:37

When you get the same thing that means you are doing the same thing. If you are doing something different, you will absolutely get something different.

14:06

It is your subconscious that’s driving everything. It is your consciousness that calls the shots. Whatever you are doing is a second nature because of the repetition and it is a matter of us looking at it differently by bringing our consciousness to make it aware of our subconscious.

14:38

Make a decision, you got to decide that you want to win. You have to decide that you want to advance and be the top of your game. Decide right here, right now that you are a winner.

14:58

You have to speak it. Acknowledge and speak to yourself that you are a winner.

17:18

Say who you are, that you are a winner. Make sure to say that repeatedly. What you said to yourself in a negative fashion that impacted your self esteem and self-image, whether from other people or yourself, will be set as true. It is a matter of replacing those negative thoughts with positive ones so you can produce positive results.

Challenge yourself and win

19:34

I challenge you guys and gals for at least seven days. That first thing in the morning, hone in, process, sit still, and be quiet. Let your thoughts flow, let your heart flow and allow the thoughts to come without worrying about negative thoughts. It is about you putting in the effort and the work to get the results that you are looking for.

What it means to win

23:40

Winning is beyond just material tangibles. The wins are in the intangibles. Like how you feel about yourself, how you see yourself, your self-worth, self-image, self-esteem and value. Those intangibles are what call the shots and this is how you win.

· Keywords: racism, children, trauma

· Hashtags: #talktoyourchildrenaboutracism #racism #experiencingtrauma #complextrauma #nurtureyourchildren

In today’s episode, we continue to talk about dealing with opening racism and police to your children.

We have Dr. Sarah. Danny and Antoine to help us deal with the trauma of racism with children. Let us listen as we get tips and steps on how we will be able to get the talk with our children.

Having the talk with children on police and racism.

26:55

We’ve got to start the talk within us, we have to process how does this manifests in our behavior. Be honest with yourself.

How do we know if our kids are bothered?

31:18

Children are always communicating not just how adults do, they always express themselves through play, sitting down with them and playing is one way to know how they are feeling.

33:42

Children tend to reenact what they feel. It is how they express how they feel. What you are focusing in this part is how they act when they play which shows traumas.

34:55

Another effect of complex trauma is nightmares that children can’t explain, this could be a way a young mind process trauma.

35:41

You may also notice them being forgettable at times or being violent which we must take a look at.

36:26

Kids are gifted at avoidance, they know how to avoid a topic, we must be aware when this happens to our teens.

Complex Trauma

38:26

Complex trauma can come from multiple experiences of trauma at the same time. These past few months have been hard to kids and a whole lot of change for them.

39:55

Complex trauma can teach young children that the world is not a safe place. We need to assure them on safe places where we can go.

43:02

It is okay to cry and it is okay to be venerable, we need to realize that it is okay not to be okay. When we try to avoid these, we miss our part of being human.

45:46

We must be real about how we feel because this is how we connect.

46:32

Trauma works when we feel the trauma of others within us.

49:00

If you are not able to convey with them, don’t expect them to convey. You need to convey how you feel about this certain kind of issue, you need to open up for them to open up. We need to get to the core of everything.

Where does somebody start to restore a sense of security?

54:50 Children needs structure, we can build a structure to create rituals that are lost due to the trauma experience, there are various ways we can create new rituals to create new structures at home

55:57 We need to engage with them, we need to reach them on their developmental level. It is hard to discuss racism with this age group but we can incorporate bullying to introduce this topic. Teenagers hate being lectured to, talk to them on their level.

59:11 Nurture your children, give them hugs and kisses they will need this especially this time.

1:00:50 Challenge your children on how they would react to the situation. Open opportunities to speak about how they want to contribute.

“Complex trauma can teach our children, especially black boys that the world is not a safe place”

42:35

“Our tears speak when our voice can’t”

58:05

“You can learn a lot on your child, when you put yourself in a position to learn from your child”

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Keywords: Oppression, Parenting, Talk, Teach, Educate, Honesty

Hashtags: #Thetalk

How can you teach your children about racism? Does your child know what to do in case they experience this issue? A parents’ job is to educate their children about society and the kind of situation they are going to face in their lives. It’s okay to not know everything but it is the responsibility of the parent to teach their child as much as they can and a child’s ethics and point of view about society depends on what their parents are teaching them. It’s doesn’t matter if you are not a perfect parent because there is no such thing, what’s important is that you’re true and transparent with your children.

Focus on what is Happening

8:09

Look at what you want to see happen. Don't keep focusing on what you don't want to see happen or what isn't happening for you. We need to look at what is happening and celebrate that because we will see more of that. Make sure that you stay focused on what is happening.

Being Honest and Transparent

12:40

Be completely honest, be open, and be transparent. And being age-appropriate. Depending on their age is how you want to introduce certain things to them. Always be truthful and what is happening is the key. It helps to eliminate a lot of false narratives and also helps the child understand what is actually going on in the world.

Explaining the truth to a Child

17:29

It's more hurtful to the child if you're not explaining the truth of what is happening in the world.

17:54

What's important is to stick to the facts and things that you can show and explain to your child and that way, they're not just they're just not retelling what you want them to retell. Helping them to know the facts so they can stand up for themselves and they can speak their truth and they know where they stand in life and what their rights are.

What parents need to do to help their Children

21:07

I would recommend that the parent seek some assistance to help them navigate through their feelings and help them figure out how can they address it with their child because what you don't want to do is you don't want to mess it up. After all, it's such an important conversation.

21:41

Educating yourself and getting that support. Even just to navigate through your own feelings will help you with your child.

22:16

Working through your own trauma so that you don't cast that on your child because they have their own set of traumas that they have to go through. So our job as parents and as healers is to help them work through that trauma.

Sharing your experiences with your children

23:52

When you open up to kids will open up to you and they become comfortable enough to open up to you. And so they have that experience that they can share. And they can now connect the dots

25:29

Just being honest, being open, being real. You're setting the tone and paving the way and send that example for them to do the same.

Helping and educating Kids

29:11

Use the resources that you have so that you can help the kid understand the child understand at those tender ages, and then just follow it up with a conversation.

29:46

It’s about educating and teaching them about differences and teaching them not to be afraid of differences.

Educating Parents

39:05

As an educator and therapist, to educate others, I would have to reach them at the level where they're at. Give them an analogy that works for them because their kids and their minds are moldable so you give them something that works for them so they can understand.

· Keywords: protest, police, children

· Hashtags: #blacklivesmatter, #racism, #awareness

Why is racism still prevalent in 2020? Is it because of the lack of education? Superiority complex? Or the color differences? In this modern age, where everyone has come together and struggled as one, racial differences should not be an issue anymore. It might have been sprouted from what the history has dictated, but as the people who live in the present generation, history is destined to be overwritten. Let’s all fill the planet with unconditional love for one another, regardless of your sex, color and race.

Tia’s Life as a Family Therapist

06:05

A lot of conversations are coming up as what the kids are seeing on TV. You have the different ages, the toddlers, the elementary age, the middle school age, and the high school age. Younger kids start to get confused on what they see on TV, parents reach out to me and ask how to start a conversation with them, because it is not about the birds and the bees anymore.

07:18

I see a lot of African-American youth and they want to be a part of the protest. They want to be out there marching and fighting back.

Starting a Conversation

09:40

Parents really have to, educate their kids about why they are going out there, what they were doing on that space, how to stay safe and what they may see outside is that there is a possibility of guns at a protest.

10:04

For my teenagers, they’re starting to look more like adults, so they may be treated like adults in a protest.

10:38

Parents really need to focus on education before they take them out. We teach them what it means to go against racism and prep them before they go out there if you are going to take them out there.

13:03

Your teenagers can openly talk about what they say, and just remind them that this is the nature of the world today and the reason why we are protesting. We remind them that if they are feeling that trauma, they have the outlet.

14:07

I think being willing to be open about what they say and then consistently having the conversation. Because they go back and think about this as time goes on, they will be a part of history.

Prepping your Child as they go outside

19:18

It’s going to be the start of the conversation as they get their driver’s license. As soon as they can hop in the car by themselves, make sure that you have a list of things that they need to do when they get pulled over. It is terrifying but it should not be that way.

21:02

I tell my boys that they need to be ready, understand and listen to what their parents are telling them. You need to have a plan of action for yourself. You need to understand that just because this has happened to you does not mean that you are a bad kid.

22:23

We try to tell our kids, be aware of their surroundings and be aware of who they hang out with. We try to build awareness in them ahead of time before they go out into the world.

Point of Reference for your Children

28:34

I tell the parents to make it tangible. Give them something that they can see, especially for teenagers. Seeing an unarmed black-man basically die at the hands of a police officer for doing nothing or for being arrested for something small, they will get the message.

29:40

Have this talk with them at the point when their defenses are down. Because, that when teenagers tend to intake more information when they are in a space of relaxation, like when watching a movie, perhaps.

39:38

Parents need to learn how to validate the experiences of the children, just like how we wanted to be validated as black people. It is important to teach with your children, how unfair this world is because of how you look.

· Keywords: Generation, trauma

· Hashtags: #trauma #empathy #carryingtrauma

Today we have Dani and Dr. Sarah to help us understand and get over carrying trauma from generation to generation. Join us as they clear out questions on racism and helping us go through the trauma that we carried over from our past generation let us all release the trauma that we are having with the help of guest host, Motivational Speaker, Dani Robinson, MSW and Dr. Sarah Renee.

Trauma in different ways

16:59: Trauma can come in different ways either it can come from own experience or visual trauma, having imagined to having bombarded by trauma on a daily basis, it can come from different things.

Lack of empathy

22:00 Lack of empathy triggers trauma in all of us, we see lack of empathy and it is traumatizing. We experience this trigger and instills trauma. Your home starts with you, make sure you rest and make sure you’re okay. Check with your self first.

Take care of yourself.

29:08 You have to take care of yourself first; you cannot take care of others if you can’t take care of yourself. Self-care is important. Make the time to take care and check on yourself, move out of the trauma

33:30 Shift your mindset, refresh and regroup get out of the place where it tires you out.

35:09 Family is first, this is important put yourself in order first.

Understanding traumatizing experiences

43:00 Sometimes we don’t understand other people’s trauma, we don’t know each other’s experiences and we overlook the trauma the person is going through. It is not always what the other person is doing it is always what you are doing, make sure to share this out in order for others to understand.

Can blacks can be racist?

49:44 From the set point of being black the definition of being racist, the struggle of power blacks cannot be racist but prejudice. Blacks and colored people do not have the power to suppress unlike white people who can suppress the power and have privilege, we have the misconception on how a person can become racist.

54:32 The problem is the knowledge and validation on what racism is and the context of what the situation is.

You don’t have to carry the trauma

1:03:20 We’ve been trained to think we’re supposed to carry the pain from our ancestors, we don’t have to do this. We don’t need to carry all the pain; we have to release. This is not a disrespect to our ancestors. In this way we are doing benefit to them by changing the ways and forgetting all the trauma.

1:06:07 Decide that you don’t want to be traumatized, it is your choice and the choice you have to make. This is the first step; doors open up when you decide you want to release your trauma. It won’t go away if you don’t decide you want to release.

1:10:58 Our ancestors did not bury the burden in order for us to shackle that experience, we need to push through. We need to justify what they did.

Dr. Sarah Renee Langley shares how to shift your mindset to prepare for after the pandemic and learn how to create a new normalcy in your life.

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· Keywords: victor, victim, peace, mindset

· Hashtags: #selfcare #findingpeaceinthechaos #moveforward #changemindset

What are you doing to help yourself during this Pandemic? What have you done to help yourself and others around you? Some of us may have changed our lives and other people’s lives yet we still forget to consider ourselves in other aspects of life. We need to know who we truly are and focus not just on our body, but on our mind and spirit as well. And we need to decide if are we going to let the pandemic control us or are we going to control it. The idea may be overwhelming but every little step forward is still progress and on this podcast, Dr. Sarah Langley will guide us through how to combat COVID and how to become a victor and not become the victim.

Being prepared

5:57

You already have everything that you need to deal with this. You’re already equipped for such a time as this. It's just a matter of now shifting your mindset to see it. You see it from within and take the time to sit and make sense of it with your whole self, mind, body, and spirit.

Self Care

12:25

We're teaching ourselves and telling our subconscious mindset that we're not worth it, that we are insignificant, that we are nothing, and that we are not worth the time of day for our own selves. All that is wrong. We were taught wrong there is no honor in putting yourself last and forgetting yourself in your own equation. Make yourself first and make it a top priority. There's nothing wrong with it that's not you being selfish.

Decide to be Different

14:10

Make a decision that you're going to do this thing differently. You're not going to be a fool about it and keep doing the same thing and expecting a different result. You're not gonna be insane. You can't keep doing the same thing and expecting different results.

The Right Opportunity

15:52

When something within you is like “I don't really want to feel this way. I’m tired of feeling this way. Why do I have to feel this way?” When you're at that place, you’re at the right place and right time. Strike when the iron is hot, but take full advantage when you feel that way. Because now It opens for the opportunity of choice.

18:07

Everything has been challenging our thinking, our perspective, our faith, our beliefs. Here's the opportunity for you to now truly come to know what's within you. What do you truly believe? What do you truly have faith in? Who? Really, who really are you? 

Process of Making a Choice

21:04

It's all based on a process. This is where your mindset has to come in and where you're working on yourself. Making the time to work on yourself has to come in and you've got to, there is no other answer. That's how you create a choice. That's how you create the opportunity to have a choice. You can decide to keep defaulting to what you know because that's all that's available to you. Or you create a choice.

Changing your Mindset

24:19

You can look at what are the creative ways that you can combat COVID by what you can control. When you start changing your mindset and you start thinking that way, you're telling your subconscious mind that you do have the power and the control, and therefore when you believe that and you start doing things that supplement that, more of that that comes to you.

36:26

Look at what we can do and what we can control so that can give us the momentum and energy. That gives us what we need to keep it moving. To get through and extinguish this fear. Sometimes that is the answer. To face our fear.

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