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In this episode, guest, Rachel Lavin and host Jeffrey Besecker, discuss healthy ego development and empowering our ego to work for us rather than against us.
"I struggled with that for so long until I just got tired of the chatter. I got tired of the anguish and I got tired of feeling like I wasn't living my authentic life." -guest, author, fitness trainer, and well-being coach, Rachel Lavin
The guest, Rachel, is a personal trainer, health coach, body love educator, and author of the book "Donut Diaries." She shares her personal story of struggling with projecting a false belief about body image, weight, and healthy self-image, and how she overcame it to live her authentic life. The message she wants to convey to readers and listeners is that they are not alone and that as a collective, we can empower ourselves to live authentically.
Key takeaways:
Credits:
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guest: Rachel Lavin
Credits: Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
Emotions.
They play an essential role in creating our perceptions throughout life.
They signal awareness of our current circumstances and guide our day-to-day interactions. They determine, to varying degrees, our thoughts, feelings, and interactions.
Yet, for many of us, putting our thoughts and feelings into words can be particularly difficult. Naming our emotions enables more effective self-regulation by engaging various mechanisms within our emotional and physiological systems.
Our guest today, author, Sean B.W. Parker shares his experiences with trauma, the criminal justice system, and stammering. We discussed how rumination and anticipatory anxiety can be used to reframe thought processes and how they can use Sean's story to explore the underlying issues and causes. They agreed to start from Sean's experiences within the criminal justice system and work backward.
Parker shared how he was thrust into a new environment as a young person and experienced racism and stammering, which led to feelings of shame. He discussed his family dynamic and how his older brother resented his presence, leading to a subconscious competition for their mother's love.
Sean Parker discussed the criminalization of young men in the criminal justice system and how creativity can be a source of expression and liberation. He also discussed the difficulty of expressing himself in prison due to his stammering and the lack of resources available. He also discussed the importance of honest conversations in the media and how it can help to get around the lies.
As a means to manage his difficult emotions, Sean shared how he played drums in a prison band and how he was able to remain calm and rational in a difficult situation. He and Jeffrey Besecker discussed the concept of ego and how it can be used as a perceptive filter. They also discussed the stigmatism around certain topics and how to approach them without judgment. They agreed to have another conversation soon to discuss justice reform.
Key Highlights:
Credits:
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guest: Sean B.W. Parker
Credits: Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
Our Ego.
Just what is it - and what are the key roles this mystical entity serves as we navigate a healthy sense of self, and our overall well-being as humans?
Our guest, Performance and Well-Being coach, Georgina Halabi explores the concept of ego and how it can be used to protect oneself from harm, but also how it can be used to transcend the self and connect to a higher consciousness. They discussed how wolves can be used as a metaphor for the ego and how it is important to study the behaviors of wolves to understand them better. They also discussed how the ego can be programmed to be whatever one wants it to be and how the higher self can be used to discern how to use the ego.
According to modern researchers such as Loevinger, and Cook-Geuter; there are seven primary levels of ego development. Therefore, it's essential we ask these questions when considering the evolution of our ego development.
These are all questions we'll answer as we explore the landscape of ego development and its effect on our health and overall well-being.
Action Items:
Credits:
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guest: Georgina Halabi
Credits: Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
Denial.
We’ve all heard that somewhat childish joke. You the one - about how ‘it’s not just a river in Egypt’. Yet, when it comes to why we blame others, we often find ourselves swimming in a river of it.
And when things truly fall apart, and our ability to navigate conflict floats south…
Sometimes, as things go wrong, we're often quick to point fingers. And We frequently find ourselves deflecting responsibility; offering, instead - tons of denial. When it comes to blame, many theories exist as to just why we do it. Yet, seldom does blaming others, or even ourselves - come without consequences.
In this episode of "The Light Inside," author Dustin Staiger discusses his book "Blame This Book: Rescue Your Workplace Culture From Toxicity and Scapegoating" Host Jeffrey Besecker and Dustin discuss the cultural phenomena of blaming and why it matters. Dustin explains that his research on creativity and innovation in the workplace led him to the conclusion that fear of blame is what often keeps individuals and teams from taking risks and reaching their potential. The conversation touches on how blame is a cultural phenomenon and how it affects personal and professional relationships.
Dustin and Jeffrey explore the topic of fear of failure, identifying it as a significant factor that can hinder individuals and organizations from reaching their creative potential. Staiger suggests doing a blameless pre-mortem to identify potential issues before taking on a challenging task.
By doing this, we can turn around from a "death spiral" of biased and filtered thinking and project healthier outcomes for ourselves. The importance of naming and identifying core emotions is also discussed as a helpful tool in navigating difficult situations. The episode emphasizes the importance of recognizing and addressing biased perceptions and filtered emotions in order to surrender ‘faultfinding’ and achieve healthier outcomes.
However, the guest also notes that some highly creative and innovative organizations are able to shift our relationship to this fear of failure by creating an environment of psychological safety. This allows individuals to emotionally regulate and take risks without fear of blame or adverse consequences.
Overall, the episode suggests that overcoming the fear of failure is crucial for individuals and organizations to reach their creative potential and achieve success.
Key Discussion Topics:
Today look at BLAME with author Dustin Staiger, and why we frequently deflect our sense of responsibility in order to avoid our emotional interactions. Tune in to find out how on this episode of To The Light Inside.
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guests:
Credits:
Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
Marketing Professor, Dr. Aaron Ahuvia and host, Jeffrey Besecker discussed the psychology of love and how it applies to why people love 'things', with Aaron being the first to publish empirical work on the topic.
They discussed how pleasure and identity are two factors that guide people to the things they love, and how love is connected to bonding in other mammals.
He explains that when people have a strong, positive attachment to their parents, they build a model in their head that the world is a safe place and it is easier to form relationships. He also talks about how people who have difficulty in their relationships with people may substitute pets for people.
Jeffrey Besecker and Aaron Ahuvia discussed how people's attachment to objects often connects them to people, and how people with a lack of social relationships may substitute objects for people.
When it comes to our stuff - Is It Really Love?
They also discussed how people's brains sort people and objects differently, and how hoarding can be caused by a malfunction in the brain's sorting mechanism.
Aaron Ahuvia discussed how people's brains process objects and people differently, and how companies use anthropomorphism, connections to people, and identity to create emotional connections with their products.
Aaron Ahuvia and Jeffrey Besecker discussed how people form relationships with objects and how those objects can be used to build stronger communities and relationships with people.
Key Topics:
Key Questions:
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JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guests:
Credits:
Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
Resources:
The Things We Love – How Our Passions Connect Us and Make Us Who We Are
Possessions and identity: reflections on the work of Russell Belk
Anthropomorphism and the things we love
The things we love and identity conflicts
-Uncertainty.
We’ve all felt it within our day-to-day lives. It manifests itself in a variety of ways, such as feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and stressed due to the lack of control we have over certain situations. Whether swimming in the mixed sea of thoughts and feelings as we awaiting the results of a health diagnosis, or anxiously hanging to the hopes of a job offer
We can experience uncertainty; throughout our lives - It surfaces within our relationships, our finances, our job security - or, at a larger scale, with the global economy, politics, and our environment. A natural part of life; uncertainty offers us the opportunity to adapt, learn, and grow - if we embrace it, uncertainty can lead us to personal development, and ultimately - our best selves.
In life, we all face moments of uncertainty - they shake our very foundations and often challenge us to our core. For those who receive a cancer diagnosis, this uncertainty can be overwhelming and all-consuming, leading to doubt, fear, and despair. But amidst this darkness, there are heroes who rise to the challenge, who find a way to turn doubt into hope and uncertainty into confidence.
Emma is a young woman who was diagnosed with cancer. After her diagnosis, she began to doubt herself and her ability to beat cancer and live a normal life. She began to wonder - what if the doctors were wrong, or if the cancer was going to kill her. As child - She had lost her mother to cancer. Now with her own diagnosis - those all to painful memories…came rushing back.
Emma turned to her family and friends - and she discovered, that through their empathy and caring concern - she was better able to uncover the meaning hidden within her feelings, and soon, Emma realize that she could beat cancer. And she realized that her job as a mother took priority over everything else.
When faced with doubt, it's important to shift the perspective from hesitant resistance - to natural curiosity. This mindset allows us to explore different aspects of ourselves and fuels personal transformation. By accepting uncertainty, we move beyond fear and hesitation, allowing us to confidently pursue our goals and desires.
Author, and Energy in Action Coach, Sherianna Boyle is here today to show us how to fully embrace the unpredictability of life with confidence, ease, and flow - and use it to align our values, regulate our emotions and create sustainable growth.
Tune in to find out how, on the Light Inside.
Buy Sherianna’s latest book, “Energy in Action: The Power of Emotions and Intuition to Cultivate Peace and Freedom” released May 2nd, 2023.
In this episode, you will be able to:
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guest: Sherianna Boyle
Credits: Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
In this episode, Clarissa, a 36 year old hairdresser from a small Midwestern town, struggles to find her place in the world amidst her family's criticism and judgements while navigating the power dynamics of experiential rationalization.
Self-doubt. We often wear her blanket of insecurity like a well-worn and bloodied shield. Her insidious torment, a thunderous echoing in our ears. You have probably heard them - the millions of questions that sometimes filter through our mental framing as we consider everything that might have gone wrong within a scenario.
When faced with the inherent challenges of life, we each tend to search for the safety and security discovered in our blankets of certainty - feeling as it our past experiences provide an accurate insight into our state of being. Yet unconscious, the often story changes….and our emotions tell a different story. Stories base on how we relate our present perspectives compared to the past. Therefore - our stories…are incorrect.
In this episode, you will be able to:
The resources mentioned in this episode are:
Dissociation and Self-Reflection
By taking a conscious effort to understand their triggers and remaining present, people can gradually shift towards healthier emotional self-regulation. Jeffrey Besecker shared the story of Clarissa, a woman who struggled with dissociation as a result of her difficult experiences. He emphasized that acknowledging and addressing one's dissociative tendencies is crucial in reconnecting with one's true self.
In a conversation with transformational coach, Hoda Zekavat, Besecker discussed the importance of a non-judgmental approach to managing dissociation, taking note of patterns and practicing self-compassion to encourage positive change.
Related Episodes:
Shadow Integration: Removing Emotional Baggage to Release False Beliefs with Hoda Zekavat
From Hamsters to Happiness: How to Ditch The Hedonic Treadmill of Dissatisfaction
The Autonomic Ladder: Unlock Your Natural Inner Power w/ John Eli Garay
Credits:
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guests:
Hoda Zekavat
Chandra Lynn
Kate Dudzik
Credits: Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
Resources:
Individual differences in intuitive–experiential and analytical–rational thinking styles
https://psycnet.apa.org/buy/1996-06400-015
Gut feelings, deliberative thought, and paranoid ideation: A study of experiential and rational reasoning
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0165178111008158
Julia Wesley is a medium and spiritual healer who is helping to uncover the soul blueprint for happiness. In this conversation, they discuss how to make friends with the ego and understand how it is often seen as something to fight against rather than a faithful friend. We discuss how the ego often tries to protect us from perceived threats, and how it is important to become aware of the ego and its connection to our inner voices, as well as the voices of society and others. By integrating all these different aspects, we can find our core truth and use it to create our own blueprint for happiness
This conversation revolves around the concept of ego and separating a healthy ego from a traumatized ego. The ego is a function of perspective and what is truth or untruth is subjective. A traumatized ego is typically the part of you that catastrophizes, gets anxious, and worries in social situations. This is because it is trying to keep you safe, as evolutionarily it wants you to belong. To have a healthy ego, one needs to recognize when it is functioning in the right way, such as when it is helping one to have goals and move forward. One also needs to be aware when it is functioning in the wrong way, such as catastrophizing or feeling a sense of failure. All of this helps one to have a healthy ego and live a fulfilled life.
“Who you are begins with creating your inner truth.”
That simple act of self-determination allows us to become who and what we chose.
In order to discover who we are on the inside, we must be true to ourselves on the outside. And this, is where personal and spiritual growth truly begins.
But often, as we travel this road of uncovering the truth, our ego steps in, interjecting its voice of reasoning. Our guest, Julia Wesley, is a medium and spiritual healer helping guide you to uncover Your Soul Blueprint for Happiness. Today Julia share how the ego can become a guide leading us to our blueprint for happiness, rather than a foe, leading us astray.
Tune in to follow us on this journey- on The Light Inside.
JOIN US ON INSTAGRAM: @thelightinsidepodcast
SUBSCRIBE: pod.link/thelightinside
Featured Guest: Julia Wesley
Credits: Music Score by Epidemic Sound
Executive Producer: Jeffrey Besecker
Mixing, Engineering, Production, and Mastering: Aloft Media Studio
Senior Program Director: Anna Getz
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