Deck The Hallmark

The Mighty Ducks (1992) ft. Ryan Pappolla


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The movie starts harder than any kids movie has ever started before. The movie? Intense. And we see a little Gordon Bombay get told from his coach that it all comes down to him and losing isn't an option, he proceeds to miss the goal and lose.

Cut to present day, Gordon Bombay is now a brash defense attorney that wants to win at all costs. After winning his latest case, he celebrates with some drinking and driving. He gets pulled over and that's not good.

This gets back to his boss, Mr. Ducksworth. He puts him on paid leave and tells him he's been given 500 hours of community service coaching pee-wee hockey.

Speaking of hockey, we meet the team. A group of rag tag kids who love pranking random people with dog poop. They also love hockey despite the fact that they suck at it.

Coach Bombay gets out there and sees the team. They're currently 0-9. He starts by telling them he doesn't like kids. He tells them to scrimmage while he gets on a phone call in his limo. The kids don't scrimmage. Instead, they jump on the limo and begin to shake it. They get inside and demand a ride when Charlie's mom, the mother of one of the kids on the team, shows up, yells at Bombay and makes Charlie come home.  

Wouldn't you know it, their first game is against the Hawks - Bombay's old team that is still coached by his old coach, Reilly. The Hawks are a legit hockey team. District 5? Not so much. They don't even have the right equipment. They get absolutely destroyed. Convinced that they can't win with their play, Bombay teaches them how to take the fall, act hurt, and get indignant. Charlie's not having and refuses to play by Bombay's silly rules.

Bombay, feeling a bit lost, goes to talk to his old mentor Hans who gives him the kick in the pants he needs to remember his love of hockey.

He goes to apologize to Charlie and his mom and ends up staying for dinner. He is feeling inspired and convinces Ducksworth to sponsor the team.

Bombay is suddenly the greatest coach of all time. They even tie a game.

Bombay recruits three new players: siblings Tommy and Tammy Duncan, who are skilled figure skaters, and Fulton Reed, a giant who shoots a puck like a bullet out of a gun.

Bombay discovers that due to rezoning, Hawks’ star Adam Banks should be playing for the Ducks, and forces Reilly to transfer him. While arguing with Reilly, Bombay sarcastically says that the kids don't deserve to live. They take that personally for some reason and refuse to play the next game.

Ducksworth calls Bombay and tells him he either lets Banks play for the Hawks or he's fired. Bombay says quack quack quack and leaves to go make up with the kids.

The Ducks begins to win a lot thanks to their regained trust of Bombay and the addition of Banks, despite the fact that he is a cake-eater. They make it to the championship against the Hawks. The Hawks strike early and go up 3-0. Reilly wants to make sure it's a blow out by ordering his players to take Banks out. Literally puts him on a stretcher.

Bombay tells Reilly he's going down and go gives the pep talk of all pep talks. They pull out all the stops. Fulton's big time. Figure skating. The flying V. and finally, when they need it the most, it's the triple deke to win the game.

They celebrate by Bombay kissing Charlie's mom in front of everyone which is out of line if you ask me.

The movie ends with Bombay boarding a bus to go try out for the minors again, his dream alive again. But promises he'll be back for next season no matter what. 

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