The Problem With Perfect

As we step into November, gratitude is at the heart of the season—but why does it matter so much? In this episode, we explore the science and significance of gratitude in transforming our mental health, relationships, and even our work lives. 

Join us as we dive into research-based insights, including how gratitude can reduce anxiety, boost resilience, and strengthen connections with those around us. We’ll also share practical, simple ways to foster gratitude daily, even during challenging times. Whether you’re looking to start a new gratitude practice or deepen your existing one, this conversation offers fresh ideas and inspiration to bring more positivity and appreciation into your life. Tune in and discover how gratitude can be the gift that keeps on giving, long after November. 

Show Notes: 

Sources Mentioned in This Episode:

1.Harvard Health Publishing – Article on the benefits of gratitude and its impact on happiness and mental health.

•Harvard Health Publishing

2.Greater Good Science Center, UC Berkeley – Research on the role of gratitude in reducing negative emotions and enhancing resilience.

•Greater Good Science Center

3.American Psychological Association – Discussion on gratitude’s physical health benefits, including better sleep and reduced stress.

•American Psychological Association

4.National Institutes of Health (NIH) – Research on the physiological effects of gratitude, such as lower blood pressure and improved immune response.

•National Institutes of Health

5.University of California, Davis – Studies on gratitude’s effects on relationship satisfaction and social bonds.

•University of California, Davis

6.Psychology Today – Articles on gratitude’s impact on social connections and the balance between gratitude and authenticity.

•Psychology Today

7.Forbes – Insights on how gratitude can improve workplace dynamics, productivity, and job satisfaction.

•Forbes

8.Journal of Positive Psychology – Studies on gratitude in professional settings, including effects on stress and job satisfaction.

•Journal of Positive Psychology

9.The Gratitude Project by Greater Good Science Center – Practical exercises and gratitude practices for everyday life.

•The Gratitude Project

10.Mindful.org – Resources and mindfulness practices to incorporate gratitude in daily routines.

•Mindful.org

11.Mental Health Foundation (UK) – Insights into fostering “healthy gratitude” and avoiding toxic positivity.

The Bible tells us, “Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings…” James 4:8. If there was ever a time when prayer and faith were needed, it’s now. 

For the 73% of Americans who are experiencing election anxiety and stress, prayer can offer a sense of control and empowerment. Most of all, prayer can bring peace to our lives and the world. 

We’ve heard that many churches are planning to open their doors on Nov. 5 to encourage prayer for our country. No music or ministering, just a place for people to pray and lay their worries down. If your place of worship hasn’t organized a similar opportunity, it might be worth suggesting.

We will be praying for you and our country in the days ahead. Please feel free to join us.

Show Notes:

Healthy ways to deal with election anxiety and political stress

https://www.treatmyocd.com

Volunteers of America

https://www.voa.org

To pray the prayer Robin highlights in the show, go to:

https://info.thecrossingchurch.com/blog/a-guide-to-praying-for-the-presidential-election

The meditation Denise guides us in at the end of the episode:

“If you’re feeling frightened about what comes next, don’t be. Embrace the uncertainty. Allow it to lead you places. Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and your mind as you create your own path toward happiness; don’t waste time with regret. Spin wildly into your next action. Enjoy the present, each moment, as it comes, because you’ll never get another one quite like it. And if you should ever look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over. Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart…where your hope lives. You’ll find your way again.” Alo Yoga

We live in a hurried world. The modern conveniences that are touted to "save time’" are keeping us busier than ever. We over-schedule, over-commit, and end each day exhausted and already focused on the demands of tomorrow.

Quite often, it is our relationships with God and our family that suffer the absence of our time and attention. Do you spend time each day praying, reading the Bible, journaling? Is family time devoted to spending time in communion with each other? Are we setting examples we hope our children will follow?

The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry offers tangible suggestions for living an unhurried life. The book encourages us to spend more time focusing on love, joy, and peace, and less time in a frantic state of constant motion. If you are seeking a peace-filled life, listen up.

Show Notes:
The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry: How to Stay Emotionally Healthy and Spiritually Alive in the Chaos of the Modern World 

by John Mark Comer 

Today’s episode is a must-listen for anyone curious about the creative process or determined to turn their dreams into reality. We’re sitting down with Michelle Collins Anderson, author of The Flower Sisters, a captivating novel that’s been making waves since its release earlier this year.

In our conversation, Michelle opens up about the journey of turning a dream into reality—what it really takes to write this historical fiction novel, face rejection, and push through the challenges to see her dream come to life. 

We also explore the inspiration behind The Flower Sisters—the intricate storytelling, the characters, and the heart that went into making this book something special. Whether you’re a fan of Michelle’s work or someone who needs that extra push to pursue your dreams, this is an episode you won’t want to miss!

Special Guest: Author Michelle Collins Anderson
Michelle Collins Anderson grew up in the Missouri Ozarks, a place and a way of life that have shaped her writing. She holds a Bachelor of Journalism degree from the University of Missouri and an MFA from Warren Wilson College. Her debut novel, The Flower Sisters, was an instant USA Today best-seller. Michelle’s short fiction has been nominated for a Pushcart Prize and appeared in Nimrod International Journal, Literal Latté, Midwestern Gothic, Elder Mountain: A Journal of Ozarks Studies, bosque, Literary Mama and Storied Hills: An Anthology of Contemporary Ozark Fiction. She and her husband have three adult children and live in St. Louis with two sister cats and a border collie.

Follow Michelle at:
https://www.instagram.com/michelle_collins_anderson/

To purchase the book, go to: https://www.amazon.com/Flower-Sisters-Michelle-Collins-Anderson/dp/149674828X

We are excited to kick off season six of The Problem With Perfect with a very special episode featuring none other than the podcast's original cohost, Rachel Keller! Now a marketing expert and AI enthusiast, Rachel joins us as we dive deep into how AI is reshaping both our personal and professional lives. In this thought-provoking conversation, we explore everything from AI’s role in combating the loneliness epidemic to how it can give you a competitive edge at work. 

Whether you’re curious about AI or already embracing it, this episode is packed with insights that will challenge and inspire you.

Tune in and join us for an exciting start to season six and as always, thanks for listening.

Apologies are tricky. Even when we want to make amends, we can often make the situation worse by what we say (or don’t say), and how we say it. It takes humility and honesty to admit we are wrong and to apologize well. Although a simple, “I’m sorry” is better than not saying anything at all, there are better ways to acknowledge our mistakes.

Quite often, an apology is made without an explanation or recognition of the other person’s experience. Did they feel abandoned, less than, or disrespected? Did the apology make excuses for the behavior? Owning the mistake and accepting responsibility for the words, and actions (or lack thereof) takes a willingness to be vulnerable and sincere.

Today, we'll explore the power of a sincere apology, when it can heal relationships, build trust and make a real impact. Let's break free from apologizing for things that are beyond our control and learn the art of authentic apologies, empowering us to communicate with confidence and clarity.

Show Notes:
Saying I’m Sorry? Avoid this word at all costs. https://www.becomingminimalist.com/how-to-apologize.

For the prayer app Robin mentions, go to:
https://www.24-7prayer.com/resource/lectio-365/

Today we’re tackling a topic that’s more urgent than ever: the rising tide of anxiety and depression among Gen Z. In a world where social media, smartphones, and video games dominate their lives, young people are grappling with an alarming increase in mental health issues, leading to profound questions about what it means to live a fulfilling life.

In this episode, we dive deep into Jonathan Haidt’s compelling book, The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness. As we discuss the trade of what Haidt calls the play-based childhood for a phone-based childhood, we’ll uncover how the quest for the "perfect" life has become a double-edged sword—promising connection while often delivering isolation and fear.

Join us as we explore the profound impacts of digital culture, hear stories of resilience, and discuss practical ways we can support Gen Z in navigating these challenges. Whether you’re a parent, educator, or simply someone who cares about the future, this conversation is essential. Let’s unravel the complexities of today’s youth together and discover how we can help them reclaim their lives.

Learn more about the book here:
https://www.amazon.com/Anxious-Generation-Rewiring-Childhood-Epidemic/dp/0593655036

Although most parents would like to think their tweens, teens, and adult-ish kids would not view or access pornographic material, the statistics tell us differently. And while none of us want to talk about it, many of our spouses are doing the same.

As school commences and our teens and young adults enjoy greater freedom than ever before, how can we encourage healthy, meaningful conversations about the dangers of pornography and its addictive consequences? And how can we have similar tough conversations with those adults closest to us? 

Please join us as Justin Garrett, a Christian pastor, discusses the increasing prevalence of pornography use by our young adults and how the Church can support families as they navigate this difficult issue.

Special Guest:

Justin Garrett: Lead Pastor at Athens Church, Kansas City, MO
Justin is a Columbia, MO native and worked at a church called The Crossing for 16 years. Justin and his wife, Jen, have three sons.
 
Justin attended Covenant Seminary in St. Louis, graduating in 2009 with a Master of Divinity. In 2021, the family launched Athens Church in Kansas City. 

To learn more about his church, go to https://www.athenskc.com/

Resources Justin recommends: 

https://www.covenanteyes.com/e-books/ - a wonderful collection of short and free ebooks, The Porn Circuit and Your Brain on Porn are very good. Their service is the one our whole family pays for with all devices.

https://open.spotify.com/episode/59baI34QD9A2fjLCipitDJ?si=iny9GCbFSU2s7SmWeUdRBw – A recent Preston Sprinkle podcast with an author and pastor on pornography.

https://fightthenewdrug.org/ - They are not religiously affiliated, I’ve heard people speak of them as genuine non-Christians who are just trying to educate and help people. 

The Death of Porn – an older and trusted pastor writing a book on the subject in a style of letters to the reader.

Surfing for God – a classic at getting beneath the symptom of porn consumption to understand what’s going on in the heart and desires.

School days are upon us. The backpacks have been purchased and stocked. Lunch boxes have been prepared and a new pair of shoes await by the door. Hopefully, we’ve done everything we can to ensure a successful start to the school year.

It can feel daunting to send our children out into the world without our guidance. We may have provided them with all the material tools, but what about instilling confidence and self-esteem? Can they handle feedback, correction, and consequences?

Research on parenting styles is extensive. Although there may not be a “perfect” parenting style, there are certainly styles that encourage and some that diminish. Please join us as we discuss various parenting styles - what works and what doesn’t.

Show Notes and References:

Parenting Teens with Love and Logic, Preparing Teens for Responsible Adulthood by Foster Cline, MD & Jim Fay

Parenting Styles: What Parenting Style is Right for You?

https://mcpress.mayoclinic.org/parenting/what-parenting-style-is-right-for-you

Lawnmower Parents: What are They? www.WebMD

Lawnmower Parents: Definition

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/lawnmower-parent

Welcoming a new baby to the family is a precious experience. It can also be a time of uncertainty, questioning, sleep deprivation, and unexplained emotions. Our guests, Maddie and Kyle Wolf, join us today to share their experiences as first-time parents of Baby Luka (aka Robin’s granddaughter). 

What do new moms and dads need? Which is best, breastfeeding or bottle? How can family and friends help? Our guests are quick to point out that everyone’s experience, and baby, is different. Maddie wisely shared “Fed is best” regardless of whether parents choose bottles or breastfeeding. Kyle spoke of the importance of supporting your partner and sharing responsibilities. And they both agree that bringing food that can be eaten single-handedly (because that other hand is holding the baby😊) is their favorite. 

Our guests were also honest and forthcoming about a few of the challenges they’ve experienced, and how they overcame them. We learned a lot, and we hope you do too.

Join us for this delightful, yet honest peek into parenting an infant in 2024. 

Special Guests: Maddie and Kyle Wolf
Maddie and Kyle were married in 2022 after dating for several years. Maddie, a Nurse Practitioner, and Kyle, a CPA, live in Overland Park, KS, and are the proud parents of Luka. They join us today, not as experts in parenting, but as a couple learning to manage their daughter's needs, with their own and each other's needs as well.