The moment your child is at their most emotional is not a problem to solve. It is actually the most important opportunity you have with them. In this episode, Adriane walks through the five steps to becoming your child's emotion coach, explains why validating feelings is not the same as condoning behavior, and shares a story about a client who had never formally studied emotion coaching but was doing every single step beautifully without even realizing it. That story alone will give you so much hope.

This episode is the foundation for everything else in connected parenting. If you have ever felt like you are trying to correct behavior that just keeps coming back, this is where the real shift happens.

Dr. Dan Siegel Psychiatrist, author, and clinical professor at UCLA School of Medicine. Adriane references two concepts from his work: "name it to tame it," the research showing that labeling an emotion activates the prefrontal cortex and reduces the intensity of the emotional response, and Mindsight, his framework for developing the capacity to understand your own mind and the minds of others. Learn more at drdansiegel.com

Dr. Gordon Neufeld Developmental psychologist and author of Hold On to Your Kids. Adriane references his principle of "collect before you connect before you correct," the idea that a child needs to feel attached and safe before any teaching or redirection can actually land. Learn more at neufeldinstitute.org

The Gottman Institute The emotion coaching framework taught in this episode is rooted in the research of Dr. John Gottman, whose studies found that a parent's ability to emotion-coach their child is one of the strongest predictors of that child's social, emotional, and academic outcomes. His research identified the five steps of emotion coaching that Adriane walks through in this episode. Learn more at gottman.com

Free Emotion Coach Toolkit - https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/i1x5n9 

P.U.R.P.O.S.E. Parent Transformation Program For parents who are ready to go beyond listening and actually apply this work to their specific child, their specific triggers, and their specific family. The P.U.R.P.O.S.E. Parent Transformation Program is where the deeper work happens. Emotion coaching, co-regulation, connection rituals, boundaries, and repair are all woven throughout the program with personalized coaching support.

Setting Boundaries with Purpose Toolkit A companion resource for families working through how to hold limits with empathy and without power struggles. Pairs directly with the emotion coaching framework because boundaries land so much better when the connection is already there. 

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🌐 Website: www.raisingkidswithpurpose.com 📸 Instagram: www.instagram.com/raisingkidswithpurpose

If this episode resonated with you, share it with another parent who is in the thick of the hard moments and needs to hear that those moments are actually the doorway to connection. Leaving a review helps other parents find this show.

Have you ever handed your child an iPad to get five minutes of peace, eat out at a restaurant, shop without distraction, or get anything done?

Separately, you wonder why it's so hard to parent your kid because of the emotional reactivity, lack of sleep, big behaviors, and more.

You're not imagining it.

In this episode, I'm breaking down what the research actually says about screens and young, developing brains, why handheld devices are in a completely different category than watching a movie on TV, and what to do instead.

This one is for parents of young kids: toddlers, preschoolers, and early elementary. A future episode will cover older kids and cell phones specifically.

Free Screen Time Menu A curated list of alternatives to screens, sorted by category and energy level so you always have an answer to "but what do I DO instead?" 👉 https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/p1s3x2

Dr. Jared Cooney Horvath

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If you'd like personalized support building a plan for your specific child and family, I offer discovery calls where we can talk through what's happening and map out what might actually work. 👉 www.raisingkidswithpurpose.com/chat

Website: www.raisingkidswithpurpose.com

Does your child tune you out, ignore your requests, not do their chores, or make good choices? Then they will sometimes respond when you raise your voice or threaten to take something away? And you're in constant power struggles? 

In Episode 10, we're talking about the one parenting tool that actually breaks the cycle: Collaborative & Proactive Solutions, developed by Dr. Ross Greene.

Dr. Ross Greene — Lives in the Balance The home of Collaborative & Proactive Solutions, including free tools and resources for parents.

Think: Kids — Collaborative Problem Solving (MGH) A related but distinct evidence-based approach developed at Massachusetts General Hospital.

I briefly mentioned in the episode that there are two approaches that share very similar names. Here's the quick distinction:

Both are evidence-based and share the same core belief that kids need skills, not just consequences. In this episode, I focused on Dr. Greene's approach. For a full side-by-side comparison: https://livesinthebalance.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/cps-vs-cps_edit2.pdf

Think of the one fight that keeps happening in your house. Don't try to solve it yet, just ask yourself: "What do I think is hard about this situation for my child?" That question is the beginning of Plan B.

Setting Boundaries with Purpose Toolkit: https://raisingkidswithpurpose.thrivecart.com/setting-boundaries-toolkit/ A practical resource to help you move from reactive to intentional. 

Purpose Parent Transformation Program Ready for personalized support? Book a discovery call to learn more. www.raisingkidswithpurpose.com/chat 

This may challenge everything you believe about parenting: consequences do not teach.

The research (and so many people's personal experiences) have been this super clear. By the end of this episode, you'll understand why what you were taught isn't working and what to actually do instead.

We've been handed a lie: that kids need to feel bad to do better and that without punishment, there's no discipline. For decades, adults have falsely believed that consequences are how children learn. They learn the opposite of what they need to behave better. 

In this episode, we're talking about:

Your kid will learn far more through co-regulation, connection, and play. 

Books & Research Mentioned in This Episode:

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Ready to stop surviving and start thriving?

If this episode resonated and you're ready to go beyond behavior management and actually understand what's driving your child's actions, connect with Adriane using the links below. 

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"I'm a terrible mom or dad." "I'm failing my kids." "I keep losing it, and I don't know how to stop. I'm a failure." If you've ever said any of those things, out loud or just in your head, this episode is for you.

You are not alone. And feeling like you're failing doesn't mean you ARE failing. In this episode, we're getting honest about the shame spiral so many parents are stuck in and talking about what's really going on underneath it.

In this episode, we're talking about:

The cycle stops with you. The healing starts with you. And imperfect progress still counts.

Book Mentioned in This Episode:

Resources & Links Mentioned:

Ready to stop surviving and start thriving?

If this episode resonated with you and you're ready to go deeper and understand your own nervous system, work through the patterns underneath the reactions, and become the regulated, connected parent you want to be, Adriane would love to chat!

Book a free discovery call with Adriane

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A family’s culture is the invisible thread that holds a home together. If you are looking for practical ways to build your family culture intentionally, this episode is a must-listen!

Before listening to this episode, be sure to tune into Episode 1, 2, and 3 of the Building Your Family Foundation series, which are linked below. In the fourth and final episode of this series, we are diving into what a family culture is (and isn’t) and 7 ways to build a strong family culture. 

We’re chatting about simple ways to build your family’s culture, including: 

Building a strong family culture is a journey and the fact that you're here, listening, doing the work — that IS the culture. You're already building it!

Other Episodes in This Series:

Links Mentioned in This Episode: 

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If you are looking for real, practical ways to get your kids to listen while improving your overall family communication, this episode is for you!

Before listening to this episode, be sure to tune into Episode 1 and 2 of the Building Your Family Foundation series. In this third episode of the series, we’re talking about one simple tool that will connect your family, so that your kids are feeling heard and you are parenting without yelling. 

We’re chatting about how to create family meetings your kids will ACTUALLY want to attend, with 4 easy steps: 

Family connection doesn’t just happen, it takes intention. Family meetings are a great way to give everyone in your family a voice, so that everyone feels seen, heard, and understood - and the result will be a more connected and peaceful family life. 

➡️ Don't miss the next episode in our series to learn about building a strong family culture!

Links Mentioned in This Episode: 

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Now that your family has a compass, let’s make those values something your kids can actually see, feel, and live out. 

Before listening to this episode, be sure to tune into Episode 1 of the Building Your Family Foundation series. In this second episode of the series, we’re talking about how to get your family values to stick, so they are not just on a poster on the wall but instead guide your family in hard and happy moments.

We’re chatting about the 6 ways to help your family values stick: 

Having family values isn’t just something you talk about. To truly live out these principles, choose one of the strategies we talked about today and begin to embed them into your family culture.

➡️ Don't miss the next episode in our series to learn about how to make family meetings something your kids WANT to attend!

Links Mentioned in This Episode: 

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If you want to parent with more clarity, confidence, and calm — your family needs a compass.

In Episode 1 of the Building Your Family Foundation series, we’re talking about how to define your family values so they guide your decision-making, create a sense of belonging in your family, and build a strong family culture.

We’re chatting about the 4 steps to defining your family's values: 

When you take the time to define what matters most to your family, you’re giving your children something invaluable: a compass to guide them through life’s biggest and smallest decisions.

You can be the change your family needs and it starts with your values.

➡️ Don't miss the next episode in our series to learn about the 6 practical ways to make your family values stick!

Links Mentioned in This Episode: 

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If your child is having tantrums, talking back, refusing to listen, or acting “defiant”… what do you actually believe about them in that moment?

Do you believe they’re being manipulative? Strong-willed? Disrespectful?

In this episode of Raising Kids With Purpose, Adriane unpacks the hidden parenting beliefs that shape how you respond to toddler tantrums, power struggles, and teen attitude — and why mindset matters more than any discipline strategy.

In this episode, we’re chatting about:

Above the surface, you see meltdown, refusal, backtalk, shutdown.

Same child, same moment, completely different outcome because of a mindset shift.

If you’re exhausted by constant power struggles or feel stuck in cycles with your strong-willed child, this episode will help you see what’s really happening and how to shift it.

✨ If this conversation encouraged you, subscribe and keep walking this journey with me.

Links Mentioned in this Episode: 

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