Welcome to the ATTACHMENT STYLE Series!
Today we discuss the SECURE attachment style.
Did you know that the quality of the bond you developed with your parents in the first months and years of your life determines how you bond with your romantic partners? You can develop a secure attachment or an insecure attachment style (anxious, avoidant, or disorganized). This work is called Attachment Theory and episodes 40-43 dive deeper into the different attachment styles.
Want to know your style? Click HERE to take a quick quiz! And check out the following episodes to take a closer look into each attachment style:
Episode 40: Introduction to Attachment Theory
Episode 41: Secure Attachment with Eli Harwood @attachmentnerd
Episode 42: Anxious Attachment with Erika Straub
Episode 43: Avoidant Attachment with Adam Lane Smith Today you will be hearing from Eli Harwood also known as “attachment nerd” on her social media handles. Eli is our “secure” attachment style expert, and does a fabulous job explaining the qualities and characteristics that are unique with a secure attachment style. However, we don’t just talk secure. Eli addresses all of the attachment styles and covers a whole lot of valuable information on attachment theory, insecure styles, feelings, and parenting. Eli Harwood is a licensed therapist and counselor and has been working in the field for over 15 years. Eli is on a MISSION to helping parents learn the art and science of developing a secure attachment with their kids. I link Eli’s information in the show notes because you’ll definitely be wanting it. This episode is incredibly helpful because you learn what “healthy” aka. secure looks like, and what you can move towards a healthy secure style. Listen and share with anyone who you know could benefit from hearing more about attachment styles!
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Eli and her story (00:52)
History of attachment theory (02:55)
Attachment is not a diagnosis, it’s adaptive (7:42)
What if you miss the early years as a parent? (08:53)
What does secure attachment look like in a romantic partnership? (12:58)
Path towards healing (20:48)
Boundaries (29:30)
Avoidants & Anxious bonds (32:44)
Indicators of a healthy bond (39:21)
Attachment styles in our parenting style (44:53)
Attunement (50:14)
Listening to your body (51:53)
Feeling your feelings as avoidant, secure, and anxious (58:38)
Practical exercise: Feeling your feelings (01:07:58)
Behaviorism (01:11:02)
Eli’s billboard advice (01:12:08)
Episode Recap/Closure (25:36)
Instagram: @attachmentnerd Website Podcast Links & Resources:
Instagram: @higher_consciousness_schoool Website: The School of Higher Consciousness
#attachmentstyles #attachmenttheory #secureattachment #anxiousattachment #avoidantattachment #disorganizedattachment #attached #securelyattached