The Sensualist Podcast

Anxiety is at the tip of everyone’s tongue, from children to people in their 80s and 90s. So I want to speak to experts who treat anxiety for a living, to find out more about it and how every day people can get control over their anxiety quickly and easily, before it destroys their health and relationships.

Today I’m lucky enough to speak to a man who works with anxiety, and brings a huge skillset to the table. Tim Barlen is a Consulting Hypnotist, Master Neuro-Linguistic Programming Trainer, Licensed Massage Therapist, Reiki Instructor, a member of the National Guild of Hypnotists,  and the author of Kill Your Massage Business.

We discuss what people who suffer from anxiety need to know about it.  How it affects health and relationships, what anxiety actually IS, performance anxiety vs situational anxiety, and how to manage your own when it flares up. 

www.timbarlenphypnosis.com

Instagram: Tim Barlen

This episode is about being the smile you want to see in the mirror, and discusses how you cannot get sexual satisfaction unless you are someone who can invite it.  What the heck does that even mean? A practical exercise which can instantly shift you from an annoying asshole into someone that is enjoyable to be around.  How is that as a prelude to foreplay? 

A practical exercise which instantly shifts an annoying spouse that you definitely have no interest in touching, to someone that you adore. Like Magic. 

What's a better way to manage sexual frustrations than dropping passive aggressive hints? 

How to instantly (almost) change a critical mind with regards to your partner (minute 37 for the exercise guided by Freja)

Let your New years Sexolutions include being someone better to have sex with. 

Links mentioned in the show :

David Snyder - identity by design, understanding men and women, seduction, healing and self improvement, LOA

https://bettymartin.org/videos/

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Women Stepping Into Their Power -- What does that even mean? What does it look like?  Why are the women in their 40s all divorcing their husbands? Why the heck should we listen to a man about stepping into our power? 

Marcus Ambrester explains all of this AND MORE on this podcast episode, including:  the spiritual bypassing that happens when people get caught up in polarity and submitting to an alpha male, often considered the epitome of female sexual expression (really?!?! ladies..come on), why people fear that a woman will turn into a slut when she embodies her full sexual expression and what actually happens, how to invite a man who is able to show up with his heart into your life.  

Amazing talk with an amazing man, I encourage listeners to give feedback on these subjects and we'd love to continue the discussion on another podcast with your input. 

To connect with Marcus you can see his facebook page at  https://www.facebook.com/marcus.ambrester

What does "state control"  have to do with sex and relationships?  Only EVERYTHING! 

Your state is the foundation on which everything rests,  you can't "get there"  if you're in a state of annoyance, criticism or anxiety! 

In this "clean conversation" Mohammed explains how state control can be managed deliberately and almost instantly to not only have better performance, better relationships... but what actually motivated me to contact him was the common theme of people being on medications that cause sexual dysfunction and saying they "need" to be on them because "zyx"   Well what if "zyx" was within your control to manage and balance, and you were empowered to easily have the type of response you wanted? Mohammed tells us how. 

Also: the trick to producing your own DHEA  (a vitality supplement sold in stores), get over stressful incidents quickly so that you don't take them home, and how to affect people around you (hint hint your partner) positively without saying a word. 

Mohammed is a phenomenal coach, trainer and public speaker.  He works with individual clients as well as corporate and speaking engagements.  He can be found at www.coachthemind.ca  and on facebook.

What a treat! The founder of the Esther Perel Discussion Group, Leah Marshall has provided incredible insight as well as several very useful resources for ANY kind of relationship structure, but including those who are considering a level of non monogamy. 

We talk about how polyamory can include, but is not about sex with more than one.  Facing fears and issues, the idea of don't ask don't tell, and why getting your partner to behave in a way that doesn't "make you jealous" is not always the best thing. 

What is solo poly and the relationship escalator? https://solopoly.net/

For more on Leah, visit her youtube channel! 

Leah's  Resources (HUGE LIST) 

This is this processing model to get below the jealousy to the fear underneath is: "When __ happens, I make it mean __________. My fear is that means I am __________ and that eventually ________ will happen.” For example, "When my partner falls in love with someone else, I make it mean she will love me less and eventually leave me. My fear is that means I am not enough and that eventually I will be alone.” Can be powerful to complete solo and then talk through it with your partner. The source is: http://polyweekly.com/jealousy-toolbox-and-then-what-exercise/

Steve and I discuss what the cultural definition of sexual prime is and why that is a useless definition when it comes to having great sex

Dr. Elizabeth discusses HOW hypnosis can help you to have a better sex life.  By removing blocks and obstacles to pleasure or relating, for people who let anxiety or lack of focus get in the way, who have low libido or cannot access their pleasure. Plus! 

https://drlizhypnosis.com/

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Special guest Kaz Riley of Kaz Riley Hypnotherapy, and Sexual Freedom Hypnosis and I discuss what it means to be a better woman, sexually.

This is a real, raw, honest and expert discussion about female sexuality. 

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Nighttime Conversations With Steve and Freja: 

Special guest Dr. Elizabeth Bonet talks about why being present during sex is important

Visit our guest here   https://drlizhypnosis.com/

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Productivity: Highly prized, revered. Like industriousness, it is often seen as a virtue. But is it all that?

Where did we get our ideas about productivity? Why are so many of us restless and hard on ourselves when we aren’t being productive? Can productivity be harmful, and affect our relationships detrimentally?

I mentioned to Steve the other day that I was feeling guilty as I had not made use of "all this extra time"  when my life's work had been completely shut down during  COVID 19, and that it seemed like many of my friends had used the opportunity to revamp their businesses, hustle, and get productive online, whereas with the uncertainty+zero income, I was floundering and felt like I was just surviving.... barely.  What followed was a great conversation over the immense "guilt over not making more money" and where it actually comes from, and whether it was a useful thing.