The Shek Check

Grief is known by many names- sadness, joy, anger, love, fear...just to mention a few. It is experienced & felt in ways that are unique to each of us and our relationship to the people, places or things that we are grieving.

While many voices in this world want to help by claiming that they are grief "experts", and while others are pathologizing grief or making up "stages of grief" to follow- at its core they cannot because grief is somewhere only we know- once we know it.

Confused? Intrigued? Triggered? Curious? All is welcome when you check in and check out this episode of The Shek Check. "Grief: Somewhere Only We Know"

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What if we met our anxiety WITH anxiety? When we struggle with anxious feelings and thoughts we usually look for control and certainty to calm down- but what if we don't need to calm down? What if our anxious feelings and thoughts don't need our calmness but to be rerouted instead?

What if we in order to better handle our anxiety- we shifted the focus of our ruminations and intrusive thoughts to something...less personal than ourselves?

In this episode Erez explores this and how it has shown up in his journey with anxiety.

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Sleep Hygiene resource: https://www.healthline.com/health/sleep-hygiene#electronic-devices

There are a lot of messages regarding anger and feeling angry. Being told it is bad, negative, and that it will drain you of your goodness. Hearing messages telling you to “manage" your anger or the importance to "calm down" when you are feeling angry. What if that was bullsh*t? At least some of the time.

What if anger was not the dark violent storm you were taught it is? What if anger was actually the clarity to guide you in the storm? It is true that our emotions carry energy within us- so how can we use that energy instead of thinking we need to diffuse it? 

Don't be a loser- figure out and feel your anger like the cool kids do.

Make sure to hit that follow or subscribe button so you get notified when any new episodes of The Shek Check drops because the more ways you have to check yourself the less you potentially wreck yourself. Choices. 

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If you like this episode, you might like my chat with Author and Therapist Ralph De La Rosa where we discussed the importance of rage and anger. Check it out: https://theshekcheck.com/episodes/ralph-de-la-rosa-reality-rage-and-resiliency/

For many people "stability" has been positioned as something we reach. Something we work towards or work for. A place we reach or find. How has that worked for you?

While stability is officially defined as a quality, state or degree of being stable- what if we threw a wrench in that broad definition? What if you found a new understanding of stability- one that is entirely yours?

Stability....the remix. Stability....YOUR remix.

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If you are human than you have most likely experienced burn out in some form (in your form). So, what conversation are you having with yourself regarding burnout? What does it look like for you? How compassionate are you towards yourself when you are burnt out? How much of a human are you allowing yourself to be? How are you moving beyond? 

In this episode Erez talks about his recent experiences with burnout, his eventual acceptance of his human-ness and how moving beyond meant leaving a lot of unknowns and uncertainty in the past.

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Have we missed the point of understanding what drives us instead of where we are driving to? Goals Vs. Values

We live in a very goal and milestone centric society. We teach it in our schools and homes. They show up in our relationships, our work, our friendships, our families. They drive competitions and fuel comparison culture.

There is an importance to having goals and milestones- they are destination points. Even though they keep moving and changing they serve us as motivation factors.

The question is, are we going where we really want to be going? Are those goals really ours? Do we know what is driving us to those goals?

A lot of our goals and milestones we have are learned, not self-discovered. So, why is it important to understand that the goals are actually not important?

Why should we shift our main focus to understanding and identifying what drives us? Our values.

Find out in this episode of The Shek Check Podcast.

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What is toxic positivity? Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how crappy something is, no matter what uncomfortable emotions we are feeling, no matter what the situation is- people need to find the “positive” side things and find a more positive mindset. 

The phrase “toxic positivity” has been popping up a lot lately, a lot more than it had been. Yet, it has always existed- the thinking has always existed. We are just calling it what it is now. 

Sometimes it is really obvious when toxic positivity shows up in the language or actions of people- “good vibes only”...”keep calm”....”don’t worry, be happy”. However, there are so many other ways that toxic positivity shows up in our lives, in fact I would say we have been conditioned to feel through life WITH a toxic positivity lens. 

How does it show up? Where does it show up? How is it affecting our growth and healing? How does it affect the space we create for others with their growth and healing?

Let's talk about it.

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Body image issues are more common than we think and more than we openly discuss. The fitness and diet culture remind us of this constantly. Rebecca Kennedy has lived through the toxic side of those issues and that culture and now she is changing it by example.

Rebecca Kennedy is a ACSM Certified Personal Trainer & NASM Corrective Exercise Specialist based in downtown Orlando, Florida.

After struggling with being overweight (borderline obese) the majority of her life, she jumped into the fitness world head first - not knowing at all how toxic and extreme the fitness field can be. After losing a significant amount of weight, she spiraled into the world of eating disorders, body dysmorphia and obsessiveness over achieving the “perfect” body. It wasn’t until she hit rock bottom and started recovery that she recognized what she wanted, what would truly make her happy: balance.

We all create images of how we want to look, how we want to be, and who we want to be. How far do we go with that? How much do we focus on the images of ourselves we are creating instead of how we feel? 

How much self-acceptance lives in those places? 

How much self-compassion is included? 

How much self-love are you feeling in that mind space? 

Learn more about Rebecca Kennedy and check in with her on:

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Facebook: www.facebook.com/redemptiverebeccatraining

Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@redemptiverebecca

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The inner critic  is what we call that inner voice that judges, criticizes and shames us. The thoughts surrounding actions, interactions, reactions, our choices and our behaviors-  which can be harsh. We might hate on the inner critic for screwing with our self-esteem and our confidence, so in our self-awareness journey we might be convinced to get rid of the inner critic and those thoughts. 

Is that ultimately helpful though? 

Plot twist: The inner critic is not our enemy. Those thoughts are not our enemy.

So why not choose a different way to view that inner critic that lives in you and your thoughts? 

Time for a self-check on checking in and understanding your inner critic. 

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What is the mother wound? Who does it affect? How does it show up? 

The mother wound is not a specific diagnosis but it is something that affects us all.

We are all born of a mother- and there are generations of beliefs and behaviors that get passed down from that. The roles mothers played in the past and in different cultures, how they survived to protect themselves and their children, how that affects the children they raise, and how it continues to get passed down in sons and daughter.

The mother wound.

In this episode I sat down to chat with Kerri Hummingbird- a soul guide, shamanic healer, inspirational speaker, teacher and author of the new book “Love is Fierce: Healing the Mother Wound”. We explored her discovery of how the mother wound showed up in her life, and the self-discovery journey she chose through the intentional healing of the mother wound.

Kerri Hummingbird is the best-selling author of the  books “Love is Fierce: Healing the Mother Wound”,  “From We to Me: Emerging Self After Divorce” and “Awakening to Me: One Woman’s Journey to Self-Love.” She’s also the creator, the host, and the soul of the podcast “The Soul Nectar Show”.

Learn more about Kerri Hummingbird and check in with her on social media and on her podcast! 

Website: https://kerrihummingbird.com/ 

The Soul Nectar Show : https://soulnectar.show/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kerri.hummingbird/ 

Twitter: https://twitter.com/KerriHummingbrd

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kerri.hummingbird.sami

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