the STAB! show

In this Arby’s loving episode of the STAB! show, Brisket Meal and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of large curly fries and large large Barq’s rootbeers, Marco Cabodi, Mikhail Chernyavsky & Kameron Schmid to share their three takes on DMTF, nine pieces on the bathroom wall of optimism, campaign speeches from a Shrek face waffle iron at a yard sale running for Mayor of a young adult’s kitchen, a burlap sack full of sweet corn running for President of a block party barbeque, & an automated customer service operator running for head writer of a wedding’s, “Best Man” speech, angry poems about gumption, assumption, & consumption, and who would win in fights between a toddler in an oversized tuxedo loaded with James Bond style gadgets vs. an agitated tree squirrel armed with a t-shirt cannon, Sticks vs. Stones vs. Words in a person hurting contest, & five hundred Timothee Chalamets vs. the original cast of Jackass in their prime.

In this apex predatory episode of the STAB! show, hammerhead host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel that can’t sleep or they die, consisting of Jessillee Windhaus, Alix Skye & Bernie Baktashian to share their three KUDs, definitions of new STAB!tionary words from letters RMYNIIF, CYOTUET, & DLIFLEU, closing arguments in defense of someone who's way too quick to use their horn, food poisoning, & peeing a little bit when you laugh, descriptions of new drugs Zip Zap Zops, Alabaster Flaps, & Zylepsidaux, and the tourism guides for Middle-school-sburgh, Rave-lahoma, & No-regrets-ylvania.

In this concept proving episode of the STAB! show, absolute moron and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of writers of nonsense, Nick Coleman, Gigi McGill, & Gilbert Gonzalez to share their three takes on MOMA, pick-up lines to and from a new set of tires, Spring in Sacramento, & a just okay Chicken Parm, recipes for someone who always takes the stairs at work, a Cyber Truck owner, & someone who picks up a hobby, gets really into it for three weeks, then drops it for something else with the same amount of passion, reviews of things including a TripAdvisor review of trying to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, a Yelp review of a fine dining restaurant that you’re pretty sure is just selling dog food, & an Amazon review of human feet that were accidentally purchased by a duck, and rundowns of podcasts including a podcast in the world of White Lotus, a podcast hosted by a red light camera and a fake puddle of rubber novelty vomit, & a podcast titled, “Squirt, Squirt!”.

In this hella patriotic episode of the STAB! show, lifted host Jesse Jones welcomes a rugged, top of its class panel of Jack Marie, Leo Antolin & Christy to share their three COOCs, nine items on the break room Bulletin Board of bullies, craigslist postings for a book club that reviews 80s porn magazines, promoting new “Lose Money Slow” seminars, & a mismatch set of cookware, plates, bowls, glasses and what not collected over several failed relationships, descriptions of new drugs, Fop Drops, Buff Uncles & Mundane Mushrooms, and pitches for new businesses including public image rehabilitation to the Old Gods, CPR training workshops to dolphins, & a Sour Apple flavor sales rep trying to branch out from the world of candy flavoring.

In this super fun, closely related episode of the STAB! show, vitamin F filled host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of facilitative panelists Connor Martin, Nicole Eichenberg, & Tyler Kinney to share their three takes on ANSI, pickup lines to and from oxidization, a dresser drawer full of sweatpants, & probability, new themed breakfast cereals including a cereal called “Rad Flakes”, the idea of Farmers Markets, & growing up with parents who didn’t want to be parents, wedding vows to someone who sides with the political and financial elite against their own interests, acid reflux, & an utter lack of willpower, rundowns of new Fall TV shows Fear Apartment, Therapy Person, & Awful Matchmakers of North America.