Do you remember when you took your wedding vows and promised to accept children from God and raise them in the faith? You repeated that vow each time one of your children was baptized. But what does this vow require of us homeschoolers?  Today, Ginny and Mary Ellen discuss keeping that promise and training our children to be responsible and respectful adults by living according to Church teaching.  

Show Notes:

Why it's Important:

Raising virtuous children is part of our homeschooling vocation.  Along with reading, 'riting, 'rithmetic, and religion, we parents must teach our children another R -- responsibility, and yet still another R -- respect for authority, 

Responsibility – We do not raise children, we are raising adults

Two books to model on:

• Bringing up Bebe, American author Pamela Druckerman talks about French children emptying the dishwasher at 3.  
• Farmer Boy, Laura Ingalls Wilder recounts how her husband Almanzo was training a yoke of oxen at nine years old.

Yesterday – Higher Expectations

In rural areas, 75 years ago, Little boys:

• Hauled wood and water
• Cared for animals starting when they were maybe 5 or 6.  
• Worked in the fields.  

Girls didn't get off easy either: 

• They kept the fires going, 
• weeded gardens, and 
• helped with laundry before washing machines

Today - Living Up to Low Expectations

Holy Mother Church teaches that 

• Sloth – laziness – is one of the seven deadly sins.
• Diligence – applying oneself to hard work –is one of the opposing seven heavenly virtues.  
• We are required by our vows to forbid laziness and encourage hard work.

Give Your Children Real Work to Do

• Toddlers can stow their diapers and dirty clothes and pick up their toys. 
• As kids get older, they can learn to vacuum, mop, do dishes, and even handle their laundry. 
• By 15 or so, they should be capable of running the household if you get called away.

The Next R: Respect - The 4th Commandment

Train your children in the ways that God demands

It makes family life more pleasant and prepares them to take their places in the adult world.

Start right from their first words – Please and thank you, Do you mind? Would it be too much trouble?  

Mealtime manners- No negative comments about the food, ask to be excused, clear your place

Proper greetings –  Look up from the screen and ALWAYS recognize a person who has entered the room.  

Do not interrupt for anything less than a medical emergency.  If they must, they have to excuse themselves.  

Do not allow your children to speak disrespectfully to an adult.  Ever!  Including, actually especially, you!  

Books Mentioned in the episode.

Bringing Up Bebe by Pamela Druckerman

Free Range Kids: How to Raise Safe, Self-Reliant Children by Lenore Skenazy

Farmer Boy by Laura Ingalls Wilder

Homeschooling Resources

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

Some homeschool moms on social media are miserable.  Their kids are out of control, and it's often described as a typical day. 

Well, it wasn't our typical day – and it doesn't have to be yours either. Nothing can derail home education faster than out-of-control kids.

Today, on The Stay-at-Homeschooling Mom Podcast, Mary Ellen and Ginny discuss why this is happening and share the ways to fix it. 

Show Notes:

Out-of-control kids are not unique to homeschooling families.  A trip to the park, the library, or a family restaurant will convince you that poorly behaved children are epidemic.  Many parents have convinced themselves that brattiness is just a normal stage of growing up, like cutting teeth -- it is not.  In countries all over the world, children are obedient, respectful, hardworking, and even sacrificial.

Why have we lost control?  A few ideas:

• Americans are generally pretty well off.  
• In movies and TV, parents, especially dads, are often portrayed as buffoons. 
• Childcare professionals, the so-called experts, give terrible advice.

So, who SHOULD we follow for parenting advice?  

Catholics should follow just three "pages" when it comes to raising their children:  

• Sacred Scripture
• Our Holy Traditions
• The Magisterium or teaching authority of the church.

The 4th Commandment is NOT a suggestion.  

We are required to teach our children to honor and obey us in everything that is not sinful.

The simplest path to well-behaved kids is to establish your authority right from the start.  As soon as they can understand you, probably about 1 ½ years

Rule #1: Clear, easy-to-understand rules.  

• BEFORE we leave our bedroom in the morning, we stow dirty clothes and make our beds.  
• When we get up from the table, we clear our places. 
• We always say please and thank you.  

Rule #2: Don't whine or beg your children to be good.  

• Express your expectations clearly and leave no room for doubt. 
• If they don't listen, give a clear and immediate consequence.  

Rule #3: Do not give delayed consequences.

• "No TV for you tonight is ineffective."  The kid will never remember, nor will you.  
• You don't have to yell or scream – calm and confident works best.  
• You just have to persevere. 

Rule #4: Do not argue with your kids:  

• You will never win!   
• Expect obedience and walk away from an obstinate child.  
• Do not engage. 

Rule #5: A simple, sensible schedule and a check-off list for responsibilities.

Set a regular time and post it on the fridge or a whiteboard:

• Schoolwork
• Chores
• Instrumental practice, or whatever
• Too strict? It's just the opposite.  There's ultimately less stress when children know what is expected of them.

Tune in in two weeks for part 2 of our discipline series.  

Homeschooling Resources

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

In just a few decades, we’ve gone from floppy disks to artificial intelligence. Computers that once filled entire rooms now slip easily into our pockets and purses. The digital revolution is here—and homeschooling parents can’t ignore it. So how do we navigate this ever-changing landscape while staying true to our values and educational goals? That’s what Ginny and Mary Ellen are diving into today on the Stay-at-Home Schooling Mom podcast.

Show Notes:

Should your kids have a smartphone—or maybe just a “dumb” phone? Many homeschooling parents proudly declare, “My kids will never have cell phones!” when their children are toddlers. But as those kids grow, the reality of modern life sets in. Pay phones have disappeared, and at some point—music lessons, sports practices, part-time jobs—your child will need a way to reach you.

That doesn’t mean you need to hand them a smartphone with full internet access.

In this episode, Ginny and Mary Ellen discuss realistic, age-appropriate approaches to phones and tech. From basic flip phones to laptops and Chromebooks, they break down when kids actually need a device—and what kind. They offer practical, experience-based advice on:

·      When kids truly need a phone (hint: driver’s licenses change everything)

·      Why flip phones still work—and how they can be a great first step

·      The educational benefits of controlled computer access

·      Setting healthy tech boundaries in your home

·      Social media safety and how to teach kids digital prudence

·      Creating family-friendly tech rules—like public charging stations and shared screen time standards

They also cover the importance of parental controls, device monitoring, and open conversations about online risks and responsibilities.

Today’s digital world moves fast, but with some planning, clarity, and common sense, you can raise capable, tech-wise kids without letting screens take over your home.

Homeschooling Resources

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

Do you have buddies who are toying with the idea of home education but have not yet made the leap? If you do, this is the show to pass on to them. Mary Ellen and Ginny discuss it all today, as they discuss Why NOW is the time to start homeschooling.

Show Notes:

Public schools are a disaster.

• NAEP Reading Assessment – ⅔ of students do not reach basic proficiency in ELA: ¾ in math.  
• Major universities have students taking remedial math courses. 
• The social environment in too many public schools can be toxic. Pronoun police, kindergarten drag shows, gay pride parades, and girls forced to undress in front of bio boys!  
• Often, schools ignore specific requests from parents to exempt their children from these programs.  Even if your local school is not that bad, it will certainly not help pass on your Catholic faith to the children.
• Catholic schools are few and far between and often beyond the means of many families.

You can tailor your curriculum.

• Is Junior a math whiz, even in primary years?  You can do 3rd grade with 5th grade math!  Does your daughter struggle to keep pace in her classroom?  You can move her down a level.  Or you can take longer to finish the school year.  Or you can get a special curriculum to meet her needs.  Virtually endless options for homeschooling
• Maybe your in-laws are immigrants.  You can add their native language to your school day.
• Is your child a high-performing athlete or performer? You can schedule your school day around practices, competitions, rehearsals, and performances.
• Does your family like to travel?  Pack up the books, and away you go.

It’s unnatural for kids to sit for long hours.

It is not even a little unusual today.  Little Johnny doesn’t sit still in class and has trouble paying attention.  It must be Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, and school officials will often recommend medicating him.  BTW, school districts get more money for “handicapped” kids.

Farmer Boy by Laura Ingalls Wilder should be required reading for every family with kids.  Based on a true story from a 19th-century NY state, little Almanzo is given a yoke for his 9th birthday, which he enthusiastically uses to train oxen.  Before breakfast, he and his siblings care for the livestock; they collect eggs and haul water and firewood.  Then, they have a long walk to their schoolhouse, where they are thrilled to sit down for a while.  After the long walk home, they again care for livestock before even looking for an after-school snack.

Compare that with today’s school kids. They eat breakfast; most don’t even make their beds. They wait for a bus less than a block from their homes, sit on a bus, sit in a classroom and a lunchroom, sit on a bus, and come home—too often to play video games.

Homeschooled kids can be active for much of the day.  They can do chores, take lots of breaks between classes, and rarely have to work after regular school hours.  They live a much more natural life.

Let your kid be a kid!

Brick-and-mortar schools will always be there.

We now know that most homeschooling parents can do a great job. Homeschoolers routinely outperform kids in brick-and-mortar schools by almost any measure.

But things can happen – family illness, financial problems, sometimes we just can’t continue.  Here’s the thing – the schools will still be there if you want to change your mind. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Homeschooling Resources

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

Mary Ellen and Ginny began homeschooling before the age of influencers. They say that was an enormous blessing because there is a lot of bad advice out there. 

The good news is that, using their combined over 50 years of homeschool experience, they have this to share: "The 5 Worst Pieces of Homeschooling Advice." 

Program Notes:

Let's jump into some bad homeschooling advice.

1. If it's hard, you are doing it wrong.  FALSE

• The complete opposite is true. 
• It shames the mom into thinking she is doing something wrong. 
• You are educating young minds, and they are not inclined to hard work. 
• Homeschooling well, running a household, doing sports, etc., is hard work.

Tip: Recognizing it is hard and treating it like a full-time job will make your life easier.  

2. Child-led learning will result in a complete education. FALSE

• Probably not – an attractive book is helpful but not enough.
• Math, grammar, writing skills, and foreign languages require effort and diligence.

3. Grading your child's work will kill their love of learning.  FALSE

·       Grades should never be a source of shame.

• They show if students are learning the material. 
• Grades are a guide to adjust your methods or materials.

4. Routine oppresses you and makes you less creative. FALSE

• Children thrive when they know what to expect. 
• Routine lets creativity thrive - mundane tasks are done by rote - leaving the brain free to create.  
• Many famous writers and authors have structured routines they follow with success.

5. If you feel burned out or frustrated, you should switch curriculum. FALSE

·      Being burnt out is not a good reason to switch your curriculum choices.

·      Try other things before throwing the baby out with the bath water. 

·      Frequent switching of curriculum creates gaps in skills and knowledge. 

There are many ways to cope with burnout - We did a whole episode on burnout – See the link below.

Homeschooling Resources

Coping with Burnout - Scroll down to Episode 10 on 1/25/23

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

Homeschooling can take a lot of time.  Then, we have to cook meals, clean the house, and do laundry. Oh, and do the shopping and cart kids around to activities.  

It all can seem daunting, but Ginny and Mary Ellen share their proven solution: Take some of those chores off our plates and put them smack on the kids' plates.  

Program Notes:

1. Start early - really early!  As soon as they can walk.  

• When you change a diaper, have the baby put it in the trash.  
• When toddlers change their clothes, teach them to put dirty clothes in the hamper.  
• Finishing up play time, have them stow their toys in the toy box or bin.

As they get older, but still preschool age:

• Insist that they clear their cups and plates after meals.  
• They can put away clean silverware from the dishwasher. 
• Teach them to tidy up. 
• All of this is easier if you get an early start to the day.  

2. Teach them all the necessary life skills  

• Begin to teach them to do every household chore.  
• Primary-grade kids can load a dishwasher while their older siblings rinse the dishes.  
• They can empty it while you or older kids put away stuff in high cabinets.  

Other little guy chores

• Dust furniture and run a vacuum.
• Empty room trash.  
• Teach them how to do their laundry. 

As they get older

• Teach them how to clean kitchens and baths 
• Teach them how to operate a lawn mower safely and shovel walks.
• Teach them to follow a recipe and prepare meals.  
• Make sure after-prep cleanup is included in the lesson.  
• Before they leave for college, your children should be ready to run a household.

3. Assign specific tasks and make them regular responsibilities.  

• Some parents use a "chore chart" route.  
• The advantage is different children can learn various tasks over some time.  
• The disadvantage is you have to remember to keep the chart updated 

4. Don't allow them to treat adults or siblings like unpaid help.  

• Do not allow your children to leave the table and dash off to play video games.  
• Or, for that matter, dash off to do schoolwork.  
• When dinner is finished, we all help clean up or get the little ones ready for bed. 
• Perhaps taking out the trash.  

5. Let them suffer the consequences of their actions or inactions.

• Teach the kids to do their laundry – if they forget - that's their problem.  
• In the real adult world, no one else comes to clean, cook, or do laundry for you.  
• Our kids need to be given responsibility.  
• Too many are going to college without knowing how to fry an egg.

Homeschooling Resources

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

Does teaching Shakespeare, the Constitution, or Apologetics terrify you? The fear can arrive even before high school. When my grandkids took 5th-grade life science, my DIL did a way better job teaching it than I would have. She’s a nurse and understands that stuff!

First potential solution:  

Ask among your friends, neighbors, and folks at church. Maybe a mom who quit her nursing job when she had kids wants to make a few extra bucks teaching high school biology. It’s not difficult to find a Spanish speaker. It might be enough to correct pronunciation and explain different grammar rules. Would a local priest enjoy helping with Latin or Apologetics? 

Sometimes, the simplest solution is close to home.

Another simple fix - Look online

If you don’t remember the Pythagorean theorem, you can find many clear explanations if you google it.  The internet can be dangerous, but it can also be helpful.  

Audiobooks

I did not advocate allowing kids to listen to their reading assignments, but Shakespeare’s plays were just that—plays intended to be performed on stage. Let the student read Merchant of Venice but then find a performance. It can make a big difference.

Recorded online classes

Sometimes, they are produced by a textbook company – Saxon Math has very popular videos, and Teaching Textbooks is another popular online math program. At other times, they are made by the homeschool provider to match their course offerings.  

Dual enrollment

Most community colleges accept students aged 16 and up.  Dual enrollment is an option for live classes. Prices are usually pretty reasonable. Important Note -If you enrolled in a home study school, check with one of their counselors to ensure they will accept your dual enrollment course for credit.

Homeschooling Resources

Seton Home Study School

Seton Testing Services

Motivating our students can be an uphill battle. We want them to focus and work hard, but they are inclined by their nature and encouraged by society to be distracted. There is always something more interesting or fun to do.

Today, Mary Ellen and Ginny open their tool kit of ways to encourage our children to work hard and develop good study skills without it being a constant battle. Hang on, this will be fun.

Program Notes

Motivation can be a wispy, ethereal thing arriving at inopportune times. I prefer to instill:

1. Good habits and routines.

2. This allows a child to do “the thing” without thinking about “getting down to it.” 

3. That said, a little motivation can go a long way to making the process more pleasant. 

Five Ways to Motivate

1. Gamify the lesson. This brilliant, simple technique tip from Laura Berquist:

• Challenge the child to “beat the clock” with math problems or spelling tests.
• Set a timer – see how many problems can be answered correctly before it rings.
• Use nickels as prizes; money is a great motivator.

2. Socialize the work. Teens (and preteens) need to be with their peers. 

• Try getting a study group, history or science, and learn the subject matter together.
• Add some snacks and free time to goof off
• They will likely work harder at the subject than they would on their own. 

3. Tie the lessons to the life goals. A concrete goal is a good motivator. 

• If you want to travel and study abroad in college, study your Italian lessons.
• If you want to attend medical school, let’s focus on the sciences. 
• If all else fails, the “you need to do this to get this” is a good life lesson.

4. Work alongside them—at least for a while. 

• If your student struggles with writing, try partner writing for the first paragraph. 
• He writes a line, and you write the next line; it works with math problems, too.
• Sometimes, that blank page can seem so overwhelming that it is easier not to try. 

5. Take a break. 

• A little break in the action will refresh and motivate. 
• Plan a four-day weekend and a field trip. 
• A museum or planetarium day or a nature hike or camping trip.  

Bottom Line: Focusing on developing good habits is the key to success as a student, but having some pleasant motivation makes for a happier student and a happier homeschool.

Send us a FB message and tell us what you want to hear about.

Homeschooling Resources

• Seton Home Study School

• Seton Testing Services

Feeling isolated on your homeschooling journey because you live “out in the boonies”? Worried your kids will miss out on friends—or that you’ll never meet another mom who “gets” it?
Today Ginny and Mary Ellen tackle the unique challenges of homeschooling with little local support. Drawing on decades of experience, they share concrete ways to build community, keep kids socialized, and stay sane—no matter how many miles lie between you and the nearest neighbor.

Challenges many rural (and not-so-rural) homeschoolers face

1. “Will my kids have any friends?”

   • Sparse population, long drives, fewer ready-made peer groups

   • Kids everywhere spend more time indoors/on screens—urban life isn’t automatically better

2. Lack of parental support or local mentors

   • Few (or no) other homeschoolers nearby

   • Fear of feeling “weird” or being criticized for homeschooling

3. Mom-level loneliness & burnout

   • No extended family close at hand

   • Temptation to compare yourself to picture-perfect online families

Practical ways to build real community

1. Leverage existing institutions

   • Parish life – altar-serving, CCD, youth groups, Sunday coffee-and-bagels hospitality

   • Little League, scouts, dance, music – shared interests trump age gaps

   • Public library – ask librarians to connect you with other homeschool patrons; book rooms for classes

2. Host & invite

   • Post-Mass brunches or crock-pot chili after Sunday-evening Mass

   • Team pizza parties, park picnics, backyard “bring-your-own-blanket” days

3. Find (or create) online bridges

   • Facebook groups: “Catholic Homeschooling Moms,” local “[Your-Town] Homeschoolers,” curriculum-specific groups

   • Program-specific networks (e.g., Seton’s My Seton family locator; Catholic Harbor for teens)

4. Special-needs bonus

   • Mixed-age homeschool culture often embraces kids with disabilities—fosters compassion and confidence

5. Mind your manners

   • Share positives; avoid trash-talking neighbors’ schooling choices

   • Simple, non-confrontational answers when asked, “Why do you homeschool?”

Key takeaways

• Community rarely arrives on your doorstep—but it can be built.

• Mixed-age friendships and adult role models are an asset, not a deficit.

• A little strategic hospitality (and a lot of prayer) goes a long way.

Resources mentioned

• Seton Home Study School & Seton Books

• Catholic Harbor (teen discussion platform for enrolled Seton students)

• Local parish ministries, scouts, sports leagues, public libraries

Thanks for listening!

Send topic requests via Facebook —and don’t forget to leave a review wherever you get your podcasts.

Remember when you started homeschooling your oldest in kindergarten? People would ask, "What will you do when you have to teach trigonometry?" No worries, that was years away.

Then high school arrives. But fear not—Mary Ellen and Ginny homeschooled through high school and produced great adults. Here’s how they did it and how you can, too.

8 Steps to High School Success

1. Set an alarm and get an early start in the morning, the same time every day.  

2. Those who fail to plan, plan to fail. Your student needs a lesson plan. 

3. Have a daily appointment with high school students to ensure they stay on track.

4. Figure out shortcuts or solutions to getting bogged down.  

5. A Good High School rule of thumb is about an hour each school day for each course.

6. Train your kids in practical life skills. This rule is essential! 

7. They must be a good example, especially for younger siblings if so blessed.  

8. Dress modestly and speak nicely to others and about others. People will judge homeschoolers and Catholics by what your kids do.  

Send us a FB message and tell us what you want to hear about.

Homeschooling Resources

• Seton Home Study School

• Seton Testing Services