The Things We Carry

At what point in our lives do we stop feeling our feelings and start to suppress them? Children innately feel EVERYTHING, but somewhere along the way, as adults, we lose that. Today I sit down with my dear friend, Rick Hughs. Alaskan-raised, recovering jack-of-all-trades, with a passion for entrepreneurship, craftsmanship, and good coffee, Rick is opening up about his journey to feel his feelings, his thoughts on failure, and how he is learning to navigate healthy relationships. Grab a coffee (or a whisky) and join us!

We're Exploring:

• How leaving a career snowballed a world of changes for Rick
• Balancing the big ups and big downs - finding balance in feeling
• What we learn from facing failure and how we accept that failure will happen
• The practice of sitting with our emotions and recognizing them for what they are
• Building deeper and more intentional relationships
• Why society's expectations of men's feelings need to change
• Rick's advice to someone who is avoiding feeling out of fear
• Facing your own turmoil before you try to lead others through theirs
• And so much more!!

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

Sometimes healers and experts in helping others can be the ones who struggle the most when coping with their own grief and anger. Today I am coaching Kellie Craig, who is dealing with just that. She is a hospice nurse, reiki healer, and coach who helps people come back to themselves with the many tools she's learned along the way through sound healing, breathwork, reiki, ecstatic dance, etc. Join me as we walk through how Kellie can use these tools to help her feel her own feelings and start the healing process herself.

We're Exploring:

• Processing long-standing grief years after the fact
• Managing dissociation and learning to face grief
• How to safely feel feelings when they feel too big
• Controlling vs channeling our anger
• Some key ways we can release anger in a healthier manner
• Finding balance and managing compassion fatigue
• How honoring death can help us grieve
• And so much more!!

Find out more about Kellie on her social media [links to be added]

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

What does it take for you to feel/be emotionally safe? Whose responsibility is that safety? We're continuing the conversation we started a few weeks ago about trigger warnings, with a serious discussion around the difference between safety and comfort. While people in leadership roles have a responsibility to create a safe space, we also have a personal responsibility to keep ourselves emotionally safe. It's incredibly common and sometimes controversial to mix these two up and I am excited to dive into what it means to feel safe inside ourselves, and how we can take that into our personal and professional lives.

Let's explore:

• Taking ownership of our emotional safety
• Knowing what makes you feel emotionally unsafe and honoring those boundaries
• How emotional safety differs from physical safety
• The "buzz phrase" that has become a "crutch"
• Asking yourself where your responsibility lies as a leader to foster safe environments
• Encouraging vs promising - what can we offer to those in our containers
• My challenge for you surrounding emotional safety both as a leader and as an individual

Mentioned in this episode: The Things We Carry - Ep. 20: TW: I Don't Issue Trigger Warnings https://linktr.ee/jenunderwood

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

We are back today with another episode where I take the "hot seat", with Aaron Steinberg joining me as my coach. With an MA in Integral Psychology, certificates in Leadership Development, Sex Education, and Complex and Developmental Trauma Therapy, and multiple professional coaching certifications, Aaron focuses on providing a safe space for couples and individuals to grow. Aaron and I have worked together in the past, and I am so excited to have him here coaching me today! Join us as we dig into what I really mean when I say self-care and accepting my own need to let someone else "do it". If you find yourself getting stuck in a bind, and feeling like caring for yourself seems like too much, this episode is for you!

We're exploring:

• Self-care: the bare minimum isn't enough
• The added stress of daily life without a partner
• "It's all on me" - the emotional labor of pushing through the resistance
• The pressures we put on ourselves do it all
• Letting go of the shame over wanting someone else to take over
• Losing identity in partnership - remaining yourself while letting others carry the load
• And so much more!!

Find out more about Aaron and his work at babyproofingyourrelationship.com or follow him on IG at https://www.instagram.com/aaronfscoaching.

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

Have you ever found it easier to put your feelings down on paper, rather than to speak them aloud? Do you ever find that things take on more clarity once you write them down? Maybe you have used fiction to open up and tell your story. Today, I sit down with Jenna Britton. She is an essayist, content strategist, coach, and my long time friend. Jenna has published many personal essays and articles, sharing stories that highlight her own (ongoing) journey to clarity, authenticity, and personal fulfillment. Join us, as we dive into how writing has helped each of us evolve in leadership, find connection with others, and pay attention to our truths. Interested in how writing might be able to help you? Let's find out!

Let's explore:

• How writing can help us find sort out our feelings and emotions
• What our resistance to journaling might really be telling us
• Rewriting our own stories and why it's imperative to the healing process
• Setting intentions and shifting our internal narratives
• One of Jenna's favorite creative writing exercises
• Using writing to find connection to ourselves and to others
• Jen and Jenna share the stories they are currently rewriting for themselves

And so much more!!

Find out more about Jenna and her work https://www.jennabritton.com/ or follow her on IG at https://www.instagram.com/jennabrittonwrites

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

What is a trigger really? You may have noticed the current trend of offering a trigger warning before content you are about to absorb. Maybe it has made you pause, or potentially even avoid that content altogether, but what good does that really do you? Today we are talking about how a trigger warning differs from a true trauma response disclaimer, and why I choose NOT to issue trigger warnings in my own work. It's a controversial topic for sure! Join me to hear the reasons why I think these warnings are more harmful than helpful.

We're exploring:

• What a trigger warning is and why people use them
• The true definition of triggers and how we can see them as an opportunity for growth
• How offering trauma warnings in certain situations can still be necessary
• The foundational skill of feeling uncomfortable and activated but not act
• When it is useful or necessary to graphically describe trauma vs times we can/should leave it out
• Your right as a leader to be honest about where you come from and the challenges you have overcome.

And so much more!!

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

Is it irresponsible to invest in yourself? In your business? What if money is tight, how can you know it's the right decision to take that leap? And is it OK to ask others to invest in themselves?

These are tough questions to work through, but sometimes you'll find that what's holding you back isn't what you thought it was. Today, I sit down with Claire Standen. She's a single mother, an entrepreneur, and a coach running the Wildwoman Project, working to reclaim the wildness of spirit in herself and in her clients. Join us as we dive into questions surrounding investments, support, and all things money. Claire opens up beautifully in today's episode and we waste no time digging in. Will Claire discover what she needs to take that leap forward? Is it the right time to leap? Let's find out!

We're exploring:

• The rules for building offers as business owners
• How the fear of debt can hold you back and keep you small
• Obstacles we face in business: Is it a lack of money or creativity?
• Working without a model: How can you trust the decisions you're making?
• Needs v. wants: figuring out what support you need AND deserve
• Claire's history: how she started her business, why she believes so strongly in the work she's doing, and how she's breaking the generational trauma that exists within her family
• And much more!

Connect with Claire: www.clairestanden.com

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

It's easy to think you're not doing enough and that you can do better: in leadership, in parenting, or just life in general. But odds are you ARE doing enough, more than enough, and it's time to celebrate it! Today's guest is an expert in celebration. She's the ultimate hype girl and dream coach. She empowers entrepreneurs and creatives to uncover their magic, show up as their most authentic selves, and create a life of meaning. My friend, Dr. Taryn Weil, joins me today to examine this idea of celebration and question the nuance around delusional thinking - is it healthy or unhealthy? If you've accomplished anything today, if it's hard for you to accept compliments and be in the spotlight, or if you're striving to be a better leader, don't miss this one!

We're exploring:

• Why celebration is a key part of leadership (that many are missing!)
• How Taryn weaves celebration into her life to maintain balance
• The ripple effect of celebration and how to harness its power to get what you want
• Easy tools to use for practicing acknowledgement and gratitude
• Why it's important for positive thinkers to sit with their uncomfortable feelings
• Taryn's advice for those that find it hard to celebrate or be in the spotlight
• And so much more!

Connect with Taryn: https://www.instagram.com/drtarynweil/ Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

Sometimes your life's path is predetermined. You grow up, you go to school, receive training for a certain career and stay on that path for many years, maybe even for the entirety of your professional life. But what happens when you decide a change is needed in the middle? What happens when you want to explore the unknown and forge a new trail in your life, one that's less expected, maybe even less "safe"?

Today, I'm joined by a client that's never been coached before. Dr. Tony Trinh is an infectious disease physician and he's decided it's time for a change. He's moving from Seattle to Texas, but for the first time in his life, his next professional step isn't planned out and it's uncomfortable. Listen in as we dive into what he can learn from checking in with his body and what he can trust (and even verify!) about himself and his support system. The body knows and tells us what's right before we can make sense of it in our head. But are you taking the time to check in and listen?

We're exploring:

• What inspired Tony's change of direction: Find out if this career change was planned and if medicine is still in his future.
• Lessons in nature: what we can learn about our own body from what plants show us
• The questions Tony asked himself that led him to know it was time for change
• Fear of failure: where he's feeling it and what failure could look like in Tony's life (Can you relate?)
• A visualization exercise: Tony is taking a hike! But will he stop to take a look or forge ahead?
• And much more!

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix

We're back with another coaching session where we flip the script and I get coached. Today, I'm joined by Rachel "Rae" Halder. Rae is a somatic trauma resolution practitioner with a mystical and energetic approach to healing. She weaves natural elements and sexuality into her unique methods and she's here today to guide me with my own trauma work. It's rare for me to feel this comfortable, but something about Rae's work and her energy excites me. Join us for this deep dive session into the all or nothing mentality, what that brings up for me, and how Rae helps guide me to find the gray area, that middle ground. If you find yourself needing high stress, emergency situations to get work done, let's get into it! We're digging into that and much more on today's episode, let's get started!

We're exploring:

• The feeling of imbalance and instability in the body and the world
• Patterns that persist when the pressure is on
• The lies we tell ourselves about what makes a person good and successful
• Breaking down the need to "save the world" (does it even need saving?)
• What to do with our fight mode and when we should access it
• A helpful metaphor for slowing down and tending to what's needed in the moment
• And much more!

Find out more about Rae's work at https://www.assanarae.com/work-with-me/rebirthed-and-rooted/, on IG https://www.instagram.com/erotic.earth.embodiment/ or on FB www.facebook.com/raehalder

Find out more about my work and dive in at https://emotionaldominatrix.com/ or come shoot me a message on IG! https://www.instagram.com/the_emotional_dominatrix