Special NFL Draft Minisode

We are living in a simulation.  Everyone listening to TGP, celebs included.  Huge Jayne Mansfield fans here.  What is a Wal-Mart?  Shots at The Champ, natch.  Skullduggery, chicanery or collusion – you be the judge.  Acceptance and forgiveness forged in subversion and the burning of a social contract.

 

Frankly, telling your in-laws you have RASL issues to handle should be a no questions out.

RIP (but not really), SOS.  I may not have been 40 my whole life, but my beard certainly has been.  They serve beer and chicken wings in retirement, Assaultlisberger.  Todays episode features the epitome of top end segue ways.  Stop rewarding ‘grit’ and patting dudes on the back for being little more than speed bumps.  The ultimate combo is Sandman Film Library & Nickelback.

 

You’ve clawed your way up to Respect Level 2…there are 1,000 Levels.

2021 RASL Season Review

Leaving behind an era of RASL we wont ever hope to revisit.  Starting a new stage in TGP.  What exactly is a Gustie?  Kellen Moore, Kellen Mond – just call the whole thing off.  The Brontosaurus may not be extinct after all.  Philosophical perfection.  Surprises.  Letdowns.  Flat out busts.  Moves like Jagr.  Batting stance replication.  Dead Horse Trey Sermon.

 

Tough times to realize Big Hurt is not so natural anymore.

Doing what the Patriots couldnt do.  Friending above all else.  AB trust issues.  Being daring with Dare.  Failed grenade detonations.  Najee is not needed.  The lesson is ALWAYS bet against Mike Giraffe.  Mavis the dinosaur neck usurper.  Sun God continues to scorch.  The Portrait of Thomas Brady.  There Will NOT Be Blood starring Daniel Day Cobian.  Hey, remember graduation songs?  Cherry > Apple.  Two finger touching.  RASL monolith.  The time someone gave a dollar and only got back 3 nickels.  Mr. Big Britches.  Seersucker suits and taffy.  The almost accidental dynasty.  RJVP shoutout.

 

Vitamin C the vitamin has exponentially more staying power than Vitamin C the singer.

RASL is not for snuggling.  RASL Santa, can ya bring me a sack full o’ hope?  Lady Lists.  Cancel Culture comes for DMX.  Teflon Dave.  GM Steinhaus is actually a hologram.  Black Magic strikes again.  Practice Round golf.  Ianate Peterbook.  Chase is the guy who always feels better on the bench.  Audio blockout surprise.  Missed Mo Money conversations.  GM Carp appears wooden on camera.  Neal De Grasse Tyson would NOT be a TGP fan.  Guess my meat.  MacGruber Team confusion.  WWE cannon fodder.  Beware Gordon Grappler.  Blast form Dave Guy past.  Stillwater sings SEC song.  How sour is Cabbage going to be in 2024?  Only a Futurist would enjoy predicting past the next two weeks in Maple Grove.  Washington County to Maple Grove Young Man Highway.  GM Fischer playing the rattle all episode.  Don’t get psyched.  Spot on GM Traynor impersonation.  Backdoor Sizzle.  GM Jenkins School of Inappropriate Puppetry.  Bert & Ernie get a treat with someone else’s vomit to snack on.  Another case of ‘takin it easy’ leading to total and utter debauchery.  The start of 1000 hangovers.  It’s a mogul made of tacos, duh.  Aye Yae Yae.  Get out of the way and LET. THIS. MAN. COOK

 

Nobody eats my own pies. Nobody.

Guests who placate.  Knife of comedy.  Green Bay Notre Dame daydreams.  Hey, babe, we did it! We beat ‘em!  High school track coaches have it easy.  Mouth Trauma < Nut Trauma.  Hoboken is your TE gym sock.  Bougey Westside.  RF burnout name dropping.  Lets call a spade a spade – Crossfire let us down.  Insurmountable value of Ribette sandwiches.  Hopkins Hubris almost hurts head honcho.  Sometimes we walk right into the perfect turn of phrase.  The guys playing must have known they were in the Turd Bowl.  Craig Reynolds, CPA.  Hunter Renfrow got tired of f’ing his way around RASL after breaking up with GM Hatteberg.  Moral victories on the East Coast.  Senator GMZ has too manty skeletons in his closet.  Ja’Marr Chase Christmas Season Clearance.  Just a couple irrelevant dudes talking about Tropher.  Crank up the SMUG.  Pop Quiz Santa brings a BONUS question.  It’s the little black boot that makes your dreams come true.  CAPITALISM > CHARITY.  Christmas Shoes is an abomination.  Sequels are better than originals, deal with it.  Mr Chicago is a beacon of democracy.  Danboy is apathy who obviously doesn’t respect our troops.  FEINDING for that ‘ding ding’.  The mad man, laughing in the rain.  Most heinous example yet of the Commissioner’s abuse of power.  ATTICA! ATTICA! ATTICA!  Our Guest knows all about RBs coming into themselves, an expert, you may say.  Knowing the unknown, but not knowing what you know now.  Again, please tell me, WHY ARE THESE HOUSES MADE OF GLASS?!  Hey, guys, it is what it is, and at the end of the day, don’t throw rocks.  This drop is for you, Champ.

 

Schwann’s probably does exist, at the edge of humanity in Waconia.

The weight of undefeatedness.  Active Listening.  Horrible Bosses 2 really gets it.  Life lessons from the Hangover franchise.  So many good things blossom from BOS’ deterioration.  Beautiful Mind that Despots Week 14 score.  GM Jenkins, Cat ‘Doctor’.  ALL Are Welcome at Stillwater HQ.  Baseball terms.  The murder drop returns!  Sausage races.  Dogs also not a fan of Mr Chicagos pseudo rebuild.  Men of letters, learned men, discussing transport.  Blue collar, lunch pale traveling talk.  Mind Melding.  All those courses, and all those cashier checks, are FINALLY paying off.  Conquer the quiz.  Power Hitter, Power Smacker, Power Bottom.  DON’T. GO. IN. KIRKS. BASEMENT.  Dr. SOOKS.  The power of Mike Davis is strong, in the wrong way.  Craig Reynolds, CPA.  This Cabbage isn’t sour, but its certainly not ripe.  Someone has to float to the top of this Turd Bowl.  Double, Double WHAT?!  DEALERS CHOICE.  Handsomeness factor may be too much to ignore for QB2 in Poon Land.  No more turd talk, please.  Hunter Renfrow is not a gentlemen.

 

Maybe the Centaurs are packing, and that’s why they keep tripping over themselves – talkin HOSE, bay-bay.

Some lady got on The Tropher Grace Project, and shes talking mad ish on everyone other than Hopkins - who is this lady?  Geez, lady!  Uneven Bars domination.  Managing from Abu Dhabi.  Even Jaycie Phelps’ mom has her ranked 7th in the Magnificent 7 Power Ratings.  Points envy.  RASLizing in practice.  Website functionality.  Hold on to your butts, RTS Dark Theme coming in the Spring of 2059!  What we lack in technological savviness, we make up for in cutting edge dynasty settings.  College athletes in leotards?  Youre barking up the wrong tree with RASL, as were certainly NOT interested.  Magnificent 7 cosplay.  Dominique Moceanu’s impact on our lives.  The Great Green Bay Notre Dame Game.  Keeping my CEH promise.  A Commissioner not being accused of tyranny?  This Ive GOT to hear.  Offscreen GM Traynor2 thumbs up/thumbs down drafting.  Livestream EVERYTHING is Commissioner 101.  A 1 point bonus aint a bonus.  Being a Cowboys fan is a window into poor life choices.  Were living in the Cordarresaince.  GM Traynor1 living that Maple Grove RB life.  The MPJ riddle.  Why talk records, lets just talk points.  A hearty, lunch pale team for Queen of the North.  A guest speaking DIRECTLY to my heart with HEAVY Cyborg love.  Derrick Henry Fathead living room centerpiece.  QBs are too pampered.  Sunday Night Dings.  RASL text thread mystique.  False Start Joke Jamboree.  Proper TGP titling.  Justin Tucker keeps bringing joy to the whole Traynor family.  Scathing indictments on the rest of RASL paving the way for Poon dominance.  GM Steinhaus, RASL Possum.  Its time for RASL’s most favorite game…Who is this Cabbage?!  No worries, Centaurs & Maple Grove fans, youre only looking at a decade rebuild.  Tequila Nights as the engine for roster stripping?  Small wedge of Laissez Faire.  Strong rebuke of Reeses Peanut Butter Puffs.  Dressed down about playoffs in Week 14 – we DESERVE it.  ‘Strange’ and ‘Interesting’ are nice ways of saying ‘Dumb’, ‘Moronic’ & ‘Stupid’.  Hoboken & Lake Elmo are BLAH.  Hopkins can eat BLAH, no problem.  Al Man wrapping it up before Monday Night was a prescient call.  Curling Olympic Trials breakdown.  Hey, Curtis, maybe just make this meeting an email next time, eh bud?  Real time Bullshit Meters.  Mrs. Helmsmen not gonna be happy with the tail end of Top 5.  You’ve been discreetly infected with At The End Of The Day.  Zoom rage quits.  Pentonpalooza Prep.  We may disagree on everything, but we can all get behind rectangle pizza.

 

Just a couple of kids, denied sugar cereals by their parents, commiserating

Coping adeptness.  Pete Carroll gum chewing.  Water in the bridge.  No sleeping, lots of puking.  Alternative Nickelback Theories.  Broken Tangent Promises.  The Nickelback Cycle of Hate.  Hopkins Hubris hits overdrive.  Sometimes not having an RB strategy is the BEST strategy.  A hearty GM Steinhaus Compliment Sandwich.  A House of Cards that’s even flimsier than a Kevin Spacey centered one.  Ja Rhules fuzzy math mixed with old school ESTABLISHING.  Can I have both? - someone just broke Whod You Rather.  Cant wait to get lit up in the comments for our atrocious GoT name pronunciation.  Problematic is what he likes.  Teach the Junior Cabbage, and watch them grow.  Walter Cronkite & Peter Jennings tag teaming.  League flagellation.  Crotch chopping reborn.  Deep joke deconstruction.  Points For False Starts.  Picking metaphors.  Semiconductor Madness.  The Drafting Jakobi Meyers of Quiz Performances.  MERman official.  Elevator business in Week 14.  Supply chain failures.  Want a chuckle?  Look at the Muff Cabbage lineup this week.  Just have a barf bag handy.

 

So that’s how were startin it, huh?