The Tutor Podcast

Hi, it's Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 447 of the Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of over-caffeinated uncommon sense for anyone who wants to start, grow, and love their own tutoring and coaching business the same way as mine.

My aim is to bring you the ideas that have helped me in my business journey and life, as a teacher, property investor, mentor, and parent (even in a no-nonsense no-BS kind of way), in the hope that it helps you to ave as much fun at work and in life as I do.

Although I'm here to share, I'm also here to listen. If you have any ideas that you think might be of interest on the show, or any questions, then get in touch. It's [email protected] or you can find me on X, where I am @TutorPodcast. Maybe you can help me to learn something new, something different, something better maybe, and maybe I can help you and share what you learned.

If you're good with all that, well okay, let's crack on with today – and we need to talk about money: Talk about the fear of money. This is based on a conversation I had with one of the listeners. He is an extremely smart wonderful person but he's afraid of money. So my excellent friend and all my excellent friends who listen in, this one's for you.

I did a little bit of grubbing around to try to investigate fear of money and it turns out there are three principal ones: 

Who knew? 

I didn't even know there was such a thing as a fear of money but I've met lots of people who have peculiar relationships with money: from the tightwad who never wants to put his hand in his pocket to the guy who seems to make his money disappear as soon as it lands in his bank account, and all points in between. From people who save incredibly hard and spend nothing to people who spend everything and save nothing - We all know people like this, don't we?

How you got the fear is something you can't really go back and do anything about. The chances are it will have come from parents, teachers, peers, or some experience along the way that fundamentally shifted your relationship with money.

What I'm more interested in is developing a healthy and positive relationship with money, finance, and making things work better for yourself.

First of all I think it's vitally important to understand that money is really just the counters in a game called life. It's completely made up. Money is a fiction that makes society run more smoothly than if we all had to carry around a pig under our arms to barter with.

I think we all need to get over the idea that there's some inherent value in a particular piece of paper or plastic and that the numbers on the screen of your bank app mean absolutely jack shit.

That's why banks can create money out of thin air on a bank screen and lend it to you, thus exerting vast amounts of power over you and your behavior whilst extracting additional value (interest on the loan) from you on something that they conjured out of thin air. That is fucking magic.

I'm not here to tell you if that's right or wrong. What I am here to tell you to do is acknowledge the fact that it's just a game and you're playing the game. Stepping back from understanding the rules of the game will not make you a better player. It will make you a bigger loser.

It's vitally important, and this is my big point for today, to realize that money isn't good and it isn't bad. It is, at its heart, completely neutral. What makes it good or bad is how you or I choose to use it. Like any tool, a knife can be used to kill or to perform life-saving surgery, to murder or to prepare dinner for your loved ones. The knife itself is morally neutral and so is money.

I love the idea that money is an amplifier. It will allow you to do more of what you already do. If you're a charitable giver you'll probably give more if you have more money. If you're a dick you'll probably do bigger-scale dick things if you have more money to finance your dickery. This is the reason so many people who win lotteries or, back in the day, the football pools, would often go broke very quickly. 

Money doesn't do anything other than reveal who you really are. 

Speaking very personally I've been able to do a lot more good as I've done more in business and property. I've been able to help more people because I've had more money to do it with - Just like owning better tools and more tools has allowed me to do more interesting jobs.

The money is just a store of value that can be deployed, or spent, or invested as you please.

It is convenient and reduces friction in society, that's its job and it's very good at it.

What money isn't is the end point.

If money is the end point of everything you do, you have a serious problem. There is always more money. You can't have it all so you'll always be chasing something that cannot possibly be achieved.

Frankly if you were to acquire all the money in Britain, for example, you'd find that the government would simply print a whole lot more. That new print of money would cause the buying power of the money you already had to fall in value. This is inflation and it's built into the system. In a real money system there would be no inflation and the currency would be stable. However governments successively have inflation targets, which function just like another stealth tax on your overtaxed earnings.

So - If you're afraid of spending your cash or investing your cash - just remember that you should be more afraid of leaving it in the bank earning very low returns (because its buying power is being systematically eroded by inflation, completely by design).

And as far as your phobias go, start exposing yourself to the things you're afraid of. Initially this will be uncomfortable but that discomfort will diminish over time given exposure.

Growing up in my family, we didn't really talk about money, so My brothers and I left school and went into the world of work with very little understanding of money. Pretty much no idea of saving, and it took years and years to get past that and to think in terms of saving, investment, then later into business and entrepreneurship.

I've always tried to teach Alex, my son, how money works and he's starting to get it. 

Money is not difficult but the rules are hidden in order to keep you poor and compliant. What I want you to think about today is breaking away from your servitude to money and the slavery of debt and taking control of your money so it works for you instead of for the banks and the government. 

This is your wake-up call. The future starts now and it's looking bright.

Hi, it's Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 446 of the Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of over-caffeinated uncommon sense for anyone who wants to start, grow, and love their own tutoring and coaching business the same way as mine.

My aim is to bring you the ideas that have helped me in my business journey and life, as a teacher, property investor, mentor, and parent (even in a no-nonsense no-BS kind of way), in the hope that it helps you to have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

Although I'm here to share, I'm also here to listen. If you have any ideas that you think might be of interest on the show, or any questions, then get in touch. It's [email protected] or you can find me on X, where I am @TutorPodcast. Maybe you can help me to learn something new, something different, something better maybe, and maybe I can help you and share what you learned.

I don't have all the answers and nobody does. Maybe you got a some better answers that would be helpful to myself and to others. Again it's [email protected] or @TutorPodcast on X, formerly known as Twitter. 

If you're good with all that, well okay, let's crack on with today. 

It's crept up on me lately that this is actually a very special week. It's the last day of September as I'm recording this, which means that tomorrow (Thursday) it's actually my 10th anniversary of being a property investor. That's 10 years of buying residential properties in the background of running my teaching business.That particular journey started after I had a big cycling accident in Spain and realized just how close I was to being in deep financial trouble – the realisation that I (and perhaps you, too) might be one accident or illness away from going broke has driven me to build an investment portfolio and given me a significant degree of financial freedom.

This is not a bragfest – frankly, if I can build something significant in the background of my teaching business, then anyone can – including you. I share this with you to:

You know how it goes – you’re in it every day, working hard to make something happen, build something, help someone – no matter what it takes, you’ll do it. You’ll do more for anyone else than you’ll do for yourself – just like I will.

You set a goal, reach it and screech right past without stopping, because you’ve already got your next goal in the crosshairs and you have a ridiculous tendency toward tunnel vision. Sound familiar, or is it just me? 

It’s as though you’ve just completed a marathon and breezed straight past the finish line without bothering to collect your medal or souvenir tee-shirt, so focused are you on the next marathon on your calendar.

Understandable – perhaps even laudable – but I’ve come to believe we miss something valuable: reinforcement and confirmation of the victory and the triumph of the struggle. We – as the old saying goes – don’t pause to smell the roses, to savour the sweet smell of success: no, we just ring the bell and call out “next!” as we re-roll our sleeves and pitch in to the next project, and the next…

I’ve been aware of this trait for years – my wonderful ex-fiance and friend more or less dragged me kicking and screaming to accept my degree after years of work around my job and home renovation project, my businesses and being dad to Alex… I’m grateful to her for strong-arming me to the ceremony, because it turned out to be a cherished memory that we would never have made.

It was a pretty big win.

So last weekend I sat down to reflect on the first ten years in property, on the achievements, pitfalls, lessons learned, promises kept and friends made along the way.

The portfolio has grown to something significant and is still growing, and I’m almost proud to have gotten this far.

But more than the financial and property parts of that business that I have grown – I realised that the business has also grown me in return.

A wise man – I think it was the great Jim Rohn - once pointed out that the greatest wins are not on a balance sheet or revenue statement: they are the person you become along the way.

Man, he nailed it. 

So tomorrow morning I’m going to pause and celebrate the last ten years in property… and while I’m at it I might allow myself a smile and think about what I’ve managed to achieve in the last 27 years teaching guitar, collaborating on musical projects, writing books and songs, developing and refining new learning pathways to help my tribe, and so much more.

Most of all I’ll be grateful that I tried, that I didn’t listen to the doubters and the inner voices who wanted me to stay who I was back then.

So now it’s your turn: pause and think about your own wins in life and business… really pat yourself on the back and notice how you’ve grown and built in your own life.

And most of all – remember to be grateful to yourself for believing in YOU and for you taking the chances that made all the difference to you and to those around you.

You did great, didn’t you?

We're going to wrap it up there because I've got things to do, people to see, and I know you do too. So I'm always trying to keep this brief. If you enjoyed the show, please like or subscribe. Feel free to send any questions or feedback to [email protected]. Leave me a message on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and all being well, I'll see you in the next show. I hope this has been useful to you. Till next time, stay healthy, stay useful. Remember that you're always loved and you're never alone. Have a fabulous day.

In this Monday morning Neil tackles the ever-growing entrepreneurial to-do list and shares a ruthless but effective prioritization strategy inspired by Warren Buffett. Neil also breaks down why getting out of your own head by hiring a mentor can be the ultimate catalyst for saving time, making more money, and eliminating limiting beliefs.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

The Trap of the To-Do List: As a business owner, your task list will inevitably grow faster than you can complete it. Success comes from eliminating distractions, not just working faster.

Warren Buffett’s 5/25 Rule:

The ROI of Mentorship: A strong business coach or mentor should always pay for themselves by helping you make more money, save time, solve problems, and reduce costs.

The Train Platform Metaphor: When you are stuck in your own head, it is difficult to see your situation objectively. A mentor acts as the "unconnected person on the platform" who can clearly see which train is actually moving.

ACTION STEPS

Brain Dump: Grab a cup of tea, a pen, and paper. Write out absolutely every priority or project you currently have in your life.

The Ruthless Cut: Brace yourself and circle only the top 5 items. Cross off everything else on the list, recognizing that they are merely opportunities to do less important things.

Create Visual Reminders: Write your final top 5 on two index cards. Place one on the microwave and keep the other by your computer (or set it as your phone wallpaper) so you are constantly reminded of your focus.

Seek Perspective: If you struggle to cut your list or find yourself caught in limiting beliefs, actively look into hiring a mentor to give you an objective lens and call you out on your own nonsense.

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 444 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

I’m here to share ideas that have helped me in my business journey as a teacher, entrepreneur, investor and mentor in  a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m listening: so if you have any ideas that you think might be worth exploring on the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? 

And I don’t have all the answers – nobody does - and if I rely on my own miniscule brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

Everybody has a to-do list, don't we?

If you're in business for yourself, that to-do list is usually enormous and getting longer. I guess you could say that if you're alive your to-do list is always getting longer because new things are tagged on the top faster than you can take stuff away from the list. Now here's the thing: not everything on that to-do list should be there.

There's a story going around about Warren Buffett talking to his personal pilot. I guess you can afford a personal pilot when you're one of the most successful investors in history.

Buffett asked the pilot what his top 25 priorities were and the pilot, a guy called Flint, wrote down 25 things. Great so he's got some clarity on a whole bunch of stuff. Buffett asked Flint to circle the top five priorities. Flint went ahead and circled, unaware of the trap he was falling into.

With the five top items circled Buffett took a pen and crossed out the other 20. His reasoning is simple: the top five items are the ones that matter most to you. The other 20 are distractions, traps, and the thieves of time and attention.

I looked at my goals list, my priorities list, and it's huge. When I finally did pluck up the courage to grab a pen and circle the top five things on the list, it was very uncomfortable to look at the remaining 80 or so and realize that they'd be nice to do but probably weren't worth my time and attention if it took me away from the top five. Does that make sense?

Now write those top five things out on a couple of index cards, two sets. I suggest attaching one to the microwave door in the kitchen because you'll go there all the time and constantly remind yourself of what your top five projects are. The other reminder should probably go on your computer. Maybe even make it the wallpaper on your phone. These are the places where you go and will need to remind yourself of what to focus on.

If this is hard for you – get a mentor – someone you trust and who won’t pussyfoot around. If you don't have someone like that in your life, then consider hiring a mentor or business coach to help you. Remember that a good mentor should pay for themselves by

Having a mentor is the gold standard – but you can do it solo. It's really useful to sit down with yourself and dig away at your thinking. Put on the hat of an experienced business coach and look at things as though from their point of view.

You could even have AI do it for you if you construct a prompt correctly.

I love mentoring and I love being mentored. Mentoring is one of the hardest things I do, and on e of the most rewarding. When someone “gets it” and see’s their own potential – then goes out and takes action – that’s just fabulous… I wish I’d hired a mentor much sooner – it would have saved a lot of time, money and frustration, because I used to spend way too long inside my own head, caught up in my very own nonsense and limiting beliefs.

My mentor got me out of that loop.

Incidentally, his metaphor was that it’s life is like you're on a train at a station and the train on the next platform to you begins to move. You can't tell if it's your train moving or theirs. Your mentor acts as the unconnected man standing on the platform looking at both trains. From that point of view it's pretty bloody obvious which train's moving, isn't it?

That's the power of having a mentor who is outside of your situation. A good mentor can look at it objectively and give you the real deal or at least a different lens to look through.

Several of my mentees have said that this is the one thing that transforms everything, because they've been so caught up in their own heads, their own thinking, and the constraints of their own beliefs and paradigms that they can't see the wood for the trees. It makes me smile when one of the guys thanked me for calling them out on their own bullshit.

So here's my suggestion: take a cup of tea, pen and paper, and start writing out your priorities. All of them. Every single one. 

Now brace yourself. Go back and circle the top five. Not the top six, not the top four, just the top five. Ask yourself - if those five things happened, would the rest of the list be important anymore?

If you look deep inside of yourself, the answer is probably no.

Those forty-seven other things aren't important. 

So now take your courage in both hands and cross off everything on the list that is not one of the top five. 

You'll find this exquisitely uncomfortable but that's not my problem. As you eliminate the traps and distractions of the lower-priority items, you may feel, though, you're eliminating opportunities. You are. The opportunities you're eliminating are opportunities to do less important things. 

The more important things you need to focus upon are the top five items that you circled in the brain dump of everything you think might be ever so slightly important in your life, within which are the treasures of what matters most.

Try this for yourself and let’s see how you get on…

I'd love to hear from you.

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, remember that you’re always loved and you’re never alone. Have a Fabulous Day!

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 443 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

I’m here to share ideas that have helped me in my business journey as a teacher, entrepreneur, investor and mentor in  a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m listening: so if you have any ideas that you think might be worth exploring on the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? 

And I don’t have all the answers – nobody does - and if I rely on my own miniscule brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

Ever watch one of those old sci-fi movies where the aliens nab some earthlings at raygun point, reminding the puny earthmen that Resistance is Futile….?

Maybe you – like me - love those old black & white films – even if the special effects creak visibly and the aliens are obviously just some guy wearing a dustbin and some oven-gloves…

Even the ultimate villain Darth Vader oozes that “resistance is futile” menace – though it amuses me to think of David Prowse’s high-pitched voice instead of James Earl Jones’ deep, menacing growl… 

But what if Resistance was useful sometimes?

What if we set about using Resistance to our advantage, rather than assuming it is always a negative – let’s spin it to a positive… how’s that grab you?

In my experience, even knowing that Resistance is a variable is a surprise to some people.

Grasping the idea of engineering Resistance to suit our own ends is frequently overlooked: a blindspot to some people.

Resistance is the drag or slip that makes something hard or easy, depending on how we engineer it.

If you look at any activity in your life you’re looking at a system of some kind: it’s a “do X, produce Y” kind of a deal.

Somewhere within that system is a friction component: more friction reduces the efficiency of the system, less friction increases the efficiency of the system.

Simply identifying that there is a system in operation is quite a surprise. 

But once you've identified that there is, in fact, a system in operation, you can begin to tweak the components to reduce or increase the friction within the system. 

For example if your system is to go to the gym to get healthier, what are the friction steps within the system of going to the gym and doing the training that make it hard to execute and let the system run freely?

If your system is teaching guitar to make a good income, where are the friction steps that reduce the efficiency of the system and lower the output whilst jacking up the effort?

In both those systems you want to reduce or eliminate the friction completely so the efficient system runs and produces better results for less effort.

In our gym example it might be that you sleep in your gym kit and put your trainers in the bathroom door so that when you wake in the morning and go for a pee, you inadvertently step into your training shoes. Does that make sense?

In our guitar teacher example you could reduce the friction by eliminating voids between students: booking everyone in back to back at a single location so you're not spending time in the car travelling. You're not sitting around between lessons twiddling your thumbs, doom scrolling, and generally feeling frustrated because that time isn't producing anything for you.

Conversely if you're doing something that is producing undesirable results, how do you increase the friction within the system that's producing those results so that the likelihood of that system running efficiently is reduced. Or better still, eliminated completely.

For example you have a tendency to raid the fridge late at night, usually just before bedtime. This isn't helping your health, your figure, or your self-esteem because you're constantly beating yourself up about being a late-night greedy pig. A radical solution to increase friction might be to use a U-lock, like you'd use on a push bike, to lock up the fridge and freezer doors at an appropriate time. Make sure to put the key somewhere inconvenient, where the effort of retrieving the key before you go and get it is sufficient to put you off.

For me that might mean putting the key to that U-lock in the glove compartment of the car at my “no eating deadline”. Now, when I’m fancying a snack, I look out of the window and see the car parked out in the drive in the rain and cold. Believe me, when I've got my pajamas on, that's a lot less appealing!

I remember an old colleague who had a tendency to buy loads of stupid stuff on her credit card. This was a major problem for her as she ran up tons of consumer debt and struggled to pay it down. I can't remember where she got the idea from but she wound up freezing her credit cards in her home freezer. They sat in a block of ice, forcing her to think things through whilst the cards thawed out before they could be used.

That's a pretty cool idea if you’re prone to comfort-spend out of control or you've got bad impulse control.

Friction engineering can be applied pretty much anywhere in your life, making the things you want easier and the things you don't want a lot harder. To me it makes so much sense to engineer your environment to do some of the heavy lifting for you. Not everybody agrees.

Personally I'd sooner spend a bit of time engineering my life's systems, processes, and environment to reduce friction (so I can get more of what I want with less effort and to block my own inner moron by imposing friction at every step of the processes, systems, and environments that produce the outputs I don't want).

I suggest you change one little thing for one little system or process in your life, just to see how you get on. Let it run for a while, then tweak it, adjust it, notice the difference. When you've got that nice and smooth and bedded in and you get more of what you want for less effort (or less of what you don't want for more effort), reapply the system to the next thing in your life you want to change for the better. 

Work, business, diet and exercise, relationships… everything. Start with One Thing, today, and let me know how you get on.

I'd love to hear from you.

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, remember that you’re always loved and you’re never alone. Have a Fabulous Day!

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 442 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

I’m here to share ideas that have helped me in my business journey as a teacher, entrepreneur, investor and mentor in  a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m listening: so if you have any ideas that you think might be worth exploring on the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? Because I’m smart enough to realise that I don’t have all the answers – nobody does - and if I rely on my own tiny, pea-sized brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

One of the ongoing themes of this show – and, by extension, my life – is growth, constantly evolving oneself into a slightly better version of who we are and who we want to be.

That’s not an unusual aspiration – surely most of us who are doing it for ourselves want to get better, don’t we?

To be perpetually in motion in pursuit of a worthy goal is often considered to be the hallmark – or one of the hallmarks - of a good life. Capital G, capital L.

If you – like me – are wired up this way you’ll know the feeling of intrinsic excitement that comes from immersing yourself in The Thing that You Love To Do: you maybe feel - as I do – that you’re somehow vibrating at a higher speed than almost everyone else....

The truth is that being in this state – let’s call it Flow - Mihail Czikszentmihaili’s term for a peak state of absorption in a task or work...

So we tend to feel at our best when up to our necks in The Work. To me this is a Good Thing.

But there’s a catch to changing yourself and evolving yourself...

You have to kill yourself.

Not completely and forever, anyway.

No – what you have to do is kill the person you were in order to allow the person you are becoming to emerge from the sloughed skin of who you used to be...

The person you have been up until now is not the person you need to be to take you to the next level – and there’s no room for passengers on the journey. If you can somehow manage to drag your own sorry carcase over the line, all power to you, my friend. But I guarantee you this: you won’t be able to drag anyone else over the line. The margin for error is so small, the drain on your strength, energy and commitment is so appalling, that you can – if you’re obsessed and fortunate enough – do it for yourself, but you can’t do it for anyone else.

And the person your family and friends have known for years?

Well – they are the first casualty of your endeavours... Old you – even up until today – may be little more than a snivelling, quivering heap of fears, doubts and excuses, justifications and rationalisations.

Kill Old You.

Every day, tear out from yourself one small part of the limitations and beliefs that no longer serve you. Tear your old self apart in order to make room for your new self, building yourself to be better than before.

Change is hard, yet it is the one constant of life.

Change is inevitable: growth or decay... nothing stands still... everything is either getting better or fading away.

Ultimately, over time, you’ll hardly recognise the person you have become... the slight changes often happen undetected – normalised each day but compounding up over years – endlessly ratcheting-up what “Normal” is for you, so the imperceptible death and casting off of the Old Self happens without you really noticing it.

But at some point you pause, and it hits you... in an unguarded moment you see yourself as you have become... Look cold and hard - regard yourself with an unflinching eye and recognise the transformation you have wrought. The weak forged into strength, the miser turned philanthropist, the fearfulness crafted into courage, the loafer turned worker, the old you has perished... killed by your own hand and your own will in an act of premeditated force.

Seems to me that killing yourself to live better is your duty.

What do you think?

I'd love to hear from you.

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, and Have a Fabulous Day!

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 441 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

I’m here to share ideas that have helped me in my business journey as a teacher, entrepreneur, investor and mentor in  a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m listening: so if you have any ideas that you think might be worth exploring on the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? Because I’m smart enough to realise that I don’t have all the answers – nobody does - and if I rely on my own tiny, pea-sized brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

Ever come home from the gym or a long run and just flopped?

Flumped down on the sofa, and just let every part of your body breathe out?

After all your exertions, the sofa just cradles you there – soothing and supportive – like finding yourself in the palm of some great and benevolent hand...

It’s a safe place where you can let go of all the tension in those worked-up muscles, lean back and feel the comfort of the soft cushions holding you up...

We do this with our bodies – instinctively we understand that our bodies need a moment or six to let the stress hormones and the chemistry of effort leave our system, then begin the slow process of recovery and rebuilding our body’s energy reserves so that we are prepared and ready to meet the next challenge.

Everybody knows that – on a physical level - we will need to recover, restore, and come back a little stronger after the hard work.

But I wonder how many of us treat our brains the same way?

After a day of hard thinking – crunching numbers, working with challenging clients, or just handling our own internal nonsense – how do we come down from those high stress, high energy-consuming activities?

For some it’s time to collapse in front of the TV and veg-out. For others it’s meeting friends to talk over life, the universe and everything, for some it’s going home to the family and all of the competing claims on their time and attention: playing with the kids, helping with homework, cooking dinner, giving their spouse or partner some attention: hey, they may even make it to the gym or crash out 5K in the park... the list goes on and on. 

But here’s the thing: all of those things matter – they all count – but they are all active and demanding of the brain and its ability to process complex incoming information: no wonder a great many people are mentally frazzled most of the time – for their brains, the work never stops.

Maybe you’ve experienced this yourself or know someone who lives this every day of their lives?

I know lots of folks who are like that!

You could say that that’s how modern life is: full-on, 24/7 always on the go, always busy doing something... and it is true for a lot of people.

But not everyone...

I’ve met some people who – you would think – had completely batshit crazy busy lives: artists, business people, writers, and – of course – musicians. Some of them were living batshit crazy 24/7 lives that never slowed down... but not all of them.

There are a handful of those people who were strangely serene, calm, and unflustered by almost anything...

Oddballs, in the main.

When I asked them to give me three tips about what they did to handle stress and stay relaxed they freely shared their methods. What surprised me was how similar their answers were:

No TV, no phone, no distracting stuff littering up the place, no notes, no conversations: just silence.

One of them said he like to “wrap himself up in the comforting warmth of his silent room”.

He said it was where his mind could breathe out...

I get it.

When your brain has no new information coming at it (much of which is processed as a potential threat), it begins to stand-down from its alert state...

Stress chemicals produced under stress stop being produced to the same extent, and eventually stop altogether, so no nasty hormones get dumped into your bloodstream and organs...

Your hearrate and breathing rate begin to slow...

With attention, muscles relax...

And – at the top of all this – your brain breathes out...

If your body benefits from a post-workout sofa, wouldn’t it make sense to give your brain its own “sofa” to help it to relax and begin recovering after a heavy day’s thinking?

This might be 5 minutes of sitting in the car on the driveway before entering your home... no  phone, no radio or in-car entertainment, no nagging voice from the car’s internal systems to break the silence – or at least the quiet, since cars are acoustically treated to make the cabin feel safe and quiet...

Or have a place in your home where – for just five minutes – there is silence in which the tired mind can stretch out a little bit and sigh...

Maybe this is why reading on the loo is such a cliché: you get five minutes of privacy and quiets, since even the most stupid of people understand that you’re busy and should be left alone for while. And since most bathrooms don’t have a TV, there is no chatter to occupy the mind as it rests...

Maybe that 50” TV doesn’t need to be on all day, every day?

Give your brain a break and build silence into your life: your brain will thank you for it. Start small – a few minutes to begin with – then extend the time in silence as you become more comfortable with silence itself...

Many people are freaked-out when everything is quiet – it is unfamiliar to them and makes them tense... their minds stay busy and distracted... that’s ok – for them. 

Your job is to begin to go into the silence and just listen... observe, accept, let go...

Other people and their special brand of crazy will still be there, the news will still be on repeat cycle, the radio will still be ready to shower you with calls from bigots and dullards, lying politicians and manufactured celebrity gossip...

For now, let’s have a quiet five minutes, eh?

And when you’ve done that. I'd love to hear from you.

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, and Have a Fabulous Day!

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 440 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

I’m here to share ideas that have helped me in my business journey as a teacher, entrepreneur, investor and mentor in  a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m listening: so if you have any ideas that you think might be worth exploring on the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? Because I’m smart enough to realise that I don’t have all the answers – nobody does - and if I rely on my own tiny, pea-sized brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

Now as many of you know, I'm massively influenced by Japan and Japanese culture. This is a post that's quite personal to me because it resonates deeply with something I've been living in for a long time. It's the idea of teaching or any kind of job really being a craft. I connect that with the Japanese idea of Shokunin, which is a Japanese word that means artisan or craftsman. It's actually any person who is in work or a professional. Superficially that's fine as good as it goes but there is a kind of reverence attached to this. True Shokunin are revered within Japanese society. Maybe it's the depth of what they do, the spirituality and the commitment to mastery of the craft, which means every day trying to do the craft a little bit better.

Now I also connect this with the daily exercise, the daily practice of constant never-ending improvement, which is epitomized to me by the Japanese word Kaizen. Kaizen has been responsible for many of the incremental improvements that have made companies like Toyota such a powerhouse in the world.

Every day they strive to do what they do a little bit better every single day and everyone involved in the production of, say, a Toyota car has the power to stop production to make an improvement. Everybody gets listened to because they're the people with their hands on the tools who are bolting things together, putting trims into place, who could maybe tweak a process and save a few seconds here, a few seconds there. Make something a little bit better, a bit neater, to constantly improve the production process. That's Kaizen. It's the way of constant improvement.

Now tied into Kaizen is this idea embodied within Shakunin of having a social duty to do your very best and to become the very best at the thing you're supposed to do, to take pride in the work that you do, pride in your products, whether you're a manual laborer or a master craftsman. Shakunin is the same path. It's lifelong dedication to the craft itself.

For me that's just like teaching. I'm dedicated to it. I love it. I love the act of teaching. When someone gets it, it lights me up. When they realize that they were never the problem after all and maybe after 50 years of wrestling with a guitar, they finally get the thing that makes them go, "Oh gosh, it wasn't me all these years. It wasn't me. I'm not the problem." Give them the gift of being able to see themselves better. That's why I'm still teaching. That's why I show up for it every day I can because I'm dedicated to the craft of being a remarkable teacher.

This is how it rolls in martial arts, business, and life. The core of the activity is the same but we're always working to just nuance it that little tiny bit. Do it that little bit better. Use Kaizen in the process to develop it to be a little bit better today than it was yesterday and tomorrow to do that improvement. We'll cycle all over again.

In my opinion as your nuance within your craft, within your profession, develops, then your own understanding of the craft, the depth of it, and the way you interpret and implement the craft itself will also change. This explains for me completely the daily practice of a skill you already are extremely good at, something that comes so naturally to you, you embody it. Your body is thinking rather than your brain. You just want to do it that teeny tiny little bit better, an imperceptible improvement stacked on another imperceptible improvement. Suddenly it starts to make a difference because they compound up over time.

This is the cycle of daily practice, followed by reflection on how it went today, adding a new nuance or a slight tweak to it, implementing and testing that, and then repeating that modified behavior over and over again until it becomes the new norm.

For myself the moral aspect of it is simple: it's the work ethic. Don't do anything half-assed. If you're committed to the profession you're in, the business you're in, the job you're in, the work you're in, don't go off half-cocked. Give it your everything. Get balls deep in what you do and stay balls deep in it for life. Keep on refining the craft and in turn that will refine you, the practitioner. If the practitioner gets better maybe the family gets better. If the family gets better maybe the village gets better and so on up to the level of the universe getting better. Maybe not for everyone but for you because you did it better.

Take pride in what you do, execute it as well as you can, and try tirelessly to do it that little bit better.

Just summing that up I guess my take on it is: get to the point where what you do is absolutely exquisite, where it's grateful, elegant, perhaps even classy. The effort of performing your professional role appears effortless because it is effortless. It's not something you actually notice doing anymore. It's simply an embodied process. It's part of you in the same way that your leg is. It just is. It's like performing a martial arts movement set, a kata or, say, the Sunim Tao from Wing Chun Kung-Fu. Initially these movements are incredibly clunky but you try to do it a little bit better every time. After a while these movement patterns, the kata, are felt more than done. They're thought and enacted by the body itself and to do them any other way than the right way feels uncomfortable, feels morally out of character. It's a jarring incongruity or maybe a fracture of the smooth running of the skill of the master craftsman or the master martial artist.

I believe that bliss is in the craft. You can lose yourself in it. It becomes intrinsically rewarding. You don't need anyone else's approval to do this. Doing it is reward enough. That in turn can become addictive, compelling, and alluring.

If this resonates with you, you are not alone. 

There’s probably a proverb somewhere that says “the craftsman who dies with a chisel in his hand dies happy though wishing for another day to use the chisel with more skill”.

That's the path of the master craftsman, the path of the master teacher, the master business person, the master writer. I believe it doesn't matter what job you are in, whether you are sweeping the streets or running a business empire. The idea of Shakunin is a consistent principle you can apply.

If you recognize this in yourself, get in touch. I'd love to hear from you.

What do you think?

I’d love to hear from you, so get in touch!

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, and Have a Fabulous Day!

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 439 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

As usual I’ve been rummaging through the ragbag of my mind and my notebooks, the ones I’ve made during all the courses, seminars, classes, webinars, conferences, field trips, research projects, books, trade press, videos and a ton of other stuff I’ve done over the years… Boiling it down to get at the good bits so I can give them to you in a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... So I’m squeezing a little more juice out of it for myself, and –at the same time - sharing it with you here in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m not just here to talk, I’m listening - so if you have any ideas that might be worth sharing via the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? Because I’m smart enough to realise that I don’t have all the answers, and if I rely on my own tiny, pea-sized brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

Today I want to share an idea I stumbled on an idea last week – not something I’d heard of before, despite being incredibly nosey and annoyingly inquisitive about learning and how people teach

As we all know, there’s no one system of teaching or learning that suits everyone, all of the time. So I figure that by sticking my nose into other people’s methods I might learn how to teach – if not better – then at least different.

What I stumbled on was somewhat counter-intuitive for me, being dragged-up in the West in a system that stigmatises failure to learn. But on reflection, what I’m going to share with you now makes perfect sense – since we all know that success leaves clues…. And so does failure….

SO - In Chinese and many other Asian schools – the students have an ERROR JOURNAL

I did a double-take when I heard it: to me the idea of recording what went wrong was ridiculous - - -don’t we want our students to get it  right?

Well, so do the Chinese and Asian education departments do this and why are their students at the top of the world’s learning scoreboard?

And yes – the data are compelling:

Rank Mathematics Reading Science 

1 Singapore Singapore Singapore

2 Macau Ireland Japan

3 Taiwan Japan Macau

4 Hong Kong South Korea Taiwan

5 Japan Taiwan South Korea

That is INCREDIBLE – the only non-Asian country on the list is Ireland – but only placing second for reading alone.

So the results are n and it’s the journal-fiddlers who appear to have destroyed just about everyone else in the field.

Their kids learn really well – across the region.

And a part of what every student learns is the use of their own  "error journals" ( cuòtíběn, or mistake notebooks) – a personal logs where the student records, analyzes, and re-solves questions they got wrong on homework or exams to prevent them from repeating the same mistakes.

Purpose and Benefits

How it Works

It is brilliant.

Those kids in Shanghai or Guanjong own their own learning process and tell themselves the truth about why stuff went wrong. They review and practice doing better… and – over time – the number of entries going into the Mistake Journal dwindles… 

The ultimate aim is to make the book obsolete… a skinnier book is envisioned as the frequency of errors falls to near-zero over time… 

What would our own school system look differently if the average British kid did that?

What do you think?

I’d love to hear from you, so get in touch!

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, and Have a Fabulous Day!

Hi, it’s Neil Cowmeadow here with episode 438 of The Tutor Podcast, the Monday morning shot of uncommon sense for anyone who wants start, grow and love their own tutoring, teaching and coaching business – the same way I love mine. 

As usual I’ve been rummaging through the ragbag of my mind and my notebooks, the ones I’ve made during all the courses, seminars, classes, webinars, conferences, field trips, research projects, books, trade press, videos and a ton of other stuff I’ve done over the years… Boiling it down to get at the good bits so I can give them to you in a no-nonsense, No BS kind of way... So I’m squeezing a little more juice out of it for myself, and –at the same time - sharing it with you here in the hope that it helps you have as much fun at work and in life as I do.

And – of course - I’m not just here to talk, I’m listening - so if you have any ideas that might be worth sharing via the show – get in touch [email protected] or on X where I am @TutorPodcast, and maybe you can help me to learn something new, something better? Because I’m smart enough to realise that I don’t have all the answers, and if I rely on my own tiny, pea-sized brain to solve all of my problems…. Well.....

If you’re good with that, let’s crack on... 

and today, we're diving into a topic that many of us struggle with but is incredibly important for our well-being: the power of saying "no."

"no" is a simple word, yet it carries a weight that can shift the dynamics of our relationships, our time management, and even our self-esteem. And such a simple word can be very hard to actually say – mostly because humans are wired for co-operation and mutual help.

In a world that often encourages us to say "yes" to every opportunity and demand, learning how to say "no" can be a rebellious, even a revolutionary act of self-care. 

Why do we often find it difficult to say no? 

Many people fear disappointing others or missing out on potential opportunities. 

There’s also the cultural pressure to be accommodating and agreeable – to fit-in and do what is considered “normal” by the masses. That’s the “what will the neighbours say?” effect – and this fear can lead us to overcommit, which in turn causes stress and burnout. 

But what happens when we say "yes" to everything? 

It’s what a friend of mine describes as “your maiuth writing cheques that your body can’t cash”

We try, of course, but we end up stretching ourselves too thin, neglecting our own needs, and ultimately feeling resentful. Instead, when we learn to say "no," we protect our time and energy, allowing us to focus on what truly matters.

Let’s break down the benefits of saying "no":

1.It Builds Confidence:  Every time you say "no" to something that doesn’t serve you, you affirm your values and priorities. This builds self-esteem and reinforces your ability to make decisions that are right for you.

2.  It Creates Space for What Matters:  Saying "no" allows you to say "yes" to the things that truly align with your goals and passions. Whether it’s spending time with loved ones, pursuing a hobby, or simply resting, saying "no" can help prioritize what really matters in your life. Remember that every YES to something is going to mean you have to say NO to something else – the opportunity cost of saying yes to a low-value or low priority request could be the high-value activity or outcome that could change your whole life. Stay on Target.

3: It Reduces Stress:  When you decline commitments that don't fit into your life, you create a manageable schedule. This leads to less stress and more time for self-care and relaxation.

4.  It Sets Boundaries:  Establishing boundaries is essential for healthy relationships. When you say "no," you communicate your limits, helping others understand and respect your needs. YOU get to specify what you’ll put up with – and what you absolutely won’t put up with from someone else.

So – how to be a badass at saying NO?

Here are a few strategies to help you say "no" effectively and gracefully. 

Now, there’s a possibility that you might experience a twinge of guilt when you say NO to a reasonable but unaligned request – it often accompanies saying "no." It’s completely natural to feel that twinge of guilt, but remember: you are not responsible for other people's feelings. 

Prioritizing your own well-being is not selfish; it’s survival – and it is totally necessary. By saying "no," you’re not only taking care of yourself but also laying-out healthy boundaries which inform others how to behave around you.

To wrap up, let’s recap on how we can incorporate saying "no" into our daily lives. Start small. Maybe it’s declining an invitation to an event you’re not excited about or saying no to an extra task at work that may overwhelm you. I do this a lot!

If you’re all twisted up about it – write it up in your journal…. As we’ve said before on the show – I’m a big fan of keeping a journal to track your feelings – so think on paper if saying NO messes with your mind and feelings. 

Then get over it.

I promise You that, over time, it becomes easier and more empowering. 

Remember, every time you choose to say "no," you’re saying "yes" to yourself. You’re taking control of your life, your time, and your energy. Embrace the power of saying "no," and watch how it transforms your life for the better.

I hope today’s discussion inspires you to embrace the power of saying "no." and do Let me know when you’ve had a bash at this and how you got on – I’d love to hear from you if you have a long line of disappointed mendicants stretching around the block, get in touch!

Drop me an email to [email protected] and  if you have any comments, questions or problems,  get in touch  - again it’s [email protected]    or on X where I am @The Tutor Podcast

Let’s leave it there for today – I hope this show has got you thinking and has been some help to you and that you’ll join me next time on The Tutor Podcast for more No-BS tips and ideas of how to Start, Grow and Love YOUR Tutoring Business – just like I love mine.

Till then, remember that your time is precious, your life is largely what you make it, so always make it good. Be excellent to yourselves - stay healthy, stay useful, and Have a Fabulous Day!