The Unseeing Critics

In this episode, Jesse dives deep into Full Throttle, a chilling collection of 12 horror short stories that'll keep your nightlights on, while Richard rolls solo through the quirky pages of Shrubley, the Monster Adventurer, a LitRPG where monsters chase dreams and loopholes.

They tackle a Blind Item Review that’s apparently saved relationships (spoiler: it involves hygiene and possibly your butt), and face off with some “Would You Rather” questions that hit like existential gut punches.

The crew also breaks down Hanky Panky (2023), a no-budget horror comedy featuring Seth Green as a possessed, evil top hat (yes, really)—filmed by a crew who literally moved into a cabin to get it done.

Plus:

• A Fun Fact about Lynus Yates’ failed attempt to microwave a Hot Pocket using only his stare (RIP to that microwave’s career).

• A Blind Movie Guess that left Jesse wondering if Hollywood is just a dare factory now.

• And Richard may or may not try to convince the world Shrubley is LitRPG literature at its mossy best.

This week, Richard and Jesse dive headfirst into the chaos, comedy, and controlled explosions of life, entertainment, and weirdness:

• Richard's Recap includes a breakdown of Reacher Season 3, Episodes 1–7 (spoiler alert: it’s still not safe to pick a fight in a diner), a plug for Discount Dan by James Hunter (LitRPG gold with coupons), and a look into The Studio, where things get unexpectedly deep.

• Jesse gets nostalgic and totally radical with a love letter to the 1990 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Cowabunga, indeed.

• Together, they unpack Apple TV+’s The Gorge, where romance meets sniper duty meets monster madness. Was it good? Was it gorge-ous? You decide.

• Next Week’s Assignment: The fellas will be reviewing the horror-comedy Hanky Panky (2023) — featuring a possessed handkerchief and a villainous top hat. Yes, seriously.

🧠 Would You Rather?This week’s "Would You Rather" segment went off the rails in the best way possible:

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In this week’s delightfully unhinged episode, the gang tackles the big questions: Is cereal just sad soup? What even is a Buffalo Hunter Hunter? And why did Richard watch War of the Noobs alone—was it punishment or pleasure?

We blindly review a suspiciously judgmental bone-shaped object that may or may not be a toddler torture device, and Jesse gets an unexpected love-hate letter from Bernice, an 87-year-old legend with Jell-O-based trauma. Plus, we reveal the tragic tale of Alan's “silent disco for the blind” that turned into an avant-garde Finnish art exhibit.

Also: Chitchat about stuff we’ve never seen but pretend we love, two “Would You Rather” brain melters, and a preview of next week’s dive into The Gorge. Bring your headphones, your soul rhythm, and maybe some tissues—for the emotional damage.

Rated 6/10 for psychological squeaky toy warfare.

In this episode of The Unseeing Critics, Jesse and Richard dive into the hard-hitting topics that truly matter—like the divisive nature of flip-flops, the ultimate fast-food french fries, and the horrors of public restrooms (spoiler: porta potties are involved).

The duo, well Richard, also takes a dive into Dungeon Crawler Carl: This Inevitable Ruin by Matt Dinniman, discussing donut holes (the iconic T-shirt from the book). To wrap things up, Richard reads a hilariously vague review, leaving Jesse to guess what bizarre item is being described.

It’s an episode packed with laughs, strong opinions, and just enough chaos to keep things interesting. Don’t miss it!

Jesse talks about Severence, "No Laughing Matter", and Richard has been in a "reading only" mood. Other books and some nostalgia stuff is discussed as we do our typical rambling.

We discuss the fact that Pennsylvania creates everything, including reading, movies, and Club Foot Dancin'!

"Best of the Best 2"

"The Perfect Weapon"

"What Happens Next" by Christina Suzann Nelson

Narrated by: Rebecca Quinn Robertson

https://www.audible.com/pd/What-Happens-Next-Audiobook/B0BRL8D3SJ?qid=1737990228&sr=1-2&ref_pageloadid=not_applicable&pf_rd_p=83218cca-c308-412f-bfcf-90198b687a2f&pf_rd_r=F3DWGN7RZKDF0EKS1W3A&plink=afATy7dhSjBS7vRG&pageLoadId=BaamDqzCYFWkPYVY&creativeId=0d6f6720-f41c-457e-a42b-8c8dceb62f2c&ref=a_search_c3_lProduct_1_2

"The Remaking" by Clay McLeod Chapman

Narrated by: several

https://www.audible.com/pd/The-Remaking-Audiobook/1980056242?qid=1737990358&sr=1-1&ref_pageloadid=not_applicable&pf_rd_p=83218cca-c308-412f-bfcf-90198b687a2f&pf_rd_r=DP53A4QQBXBQQBGG84ZA&plink=nnW8cG9ojnIbBn3M&pageLoadId=xsNULiVb8craHwNe&creativeId=0d6f6720-f41c-457e-a42b-8c8dceb62f2c&ref=a_search_c3_lProduct_1_1

Jesse talks about Squid Game, Richard talks about "Invincible Fight Girl", and the book "Under or Underneath the Breaking Sky book collection/series.