Some fat kids own their look and make it work and to those tubbies, we salute you. Jason couldn't make skinny kid work for him and he's finding it even harder being a tweener (between skinny and a gut that won't quit). The guys also think maybe their combativeness kept people from enjoying their webcomics criticisms in large numbers. Finally, Jason's middle school choir director took a day off to let he and his classmates round up the best movie myths to show him. Sound off in this week's poll to tell us your favorite movie myth!

Steve's grandma passed away and Jason can't wait to compare her unfiltered comments to pro wrestling. Also, both guys are hoping to live long enough to get their "say whatever you want, you're just old and senile" card. Finally, is there a such thing as a good pervert? The boys file their report.

Steve proves that being a parent of a little leaguer is all about location, location, location when it comes to parking while Jason's brother targeted his junk via baseball and executed a near-hit. Jason also believes the pitcher has one job and that's it and the guys agree that, when it comes to property damage, kids only have the worst ideas on how to fix it.

Steve and his family once witnessed a man hitting a Burger King with his car (no, it wasn't THE Burger King) while Jason plans on giving Randy Quaid's son his big break in his next (first) film. Also, who do you think deserves more credit: John Henry or Jason? Leave your comments below!

Jason hunted a teeny lizard in his new house and now wants a medal or something while his lieutenant in the operation was capable, if not skittish and easily discouraged (i.e. his daughter). Also, Steve saved his roommate from a cockroach wearing nothing but a towel and narrowly avoided ruining the moment thanks to the previous night's dining choices. It's a wet and wild one this week!

Jason finally tried peeing in the shower and... it was... a whole thing. He's not sure he likes the person he's becoming. Just listen and enjoy the unraveling.

Steve is far too melodramatic about his nose hairs, but to be fair, it does sound pretty annoying to have that many. However, thanks to a massive fireball that took out all of them, he's literally playing with fire to keep it that way. Meanwhile, Jason has problem with the logistics of the ending to the summer blockbuster movie, Independence Day. Finally, a Chinese custom about sneezing has Steve's kids believing he's basically a god.

Jason contradicts the whole "we fall down so we pick ourselves back up" thing but he can't wait to get EXTREME... ly into a nice video game or YouTube video, preferably indoors. Meanwhile, Steve once hit the balls AND the chode at the same time, and that's just not something you ever come back from. Finally, the guys agree that a BM is a bunch of BS. Oh, and make a time travel plan. You never know when it might come in handy!

Jason ruminates on the idea of firmware for children, and how that would explain them slowing down and failing more often as time goes on. Also, his childlike mindset provides priorities that make no sense to his wife, an adult woman. Finally, easy wins are literally the only lane that Jason traffics in when it comes to preparing a house for sale and his laziness plants the seed for a door-to-door vasectomy business the guys may someday start.

Steve saw a man peeing on a bank and that man saw Steve seeing him peeing on a bank, and Jason would be terrified to be caught peeing in public, but if it were a bank, would he become a hero, the leader of a movement? Also, the guys agree that, once you've gone inside, you must find a bathroom or else the social contract is broken. Also, DON'T PEE ON THINGS PEOPLE KISS.