Thrive After Abuse

It’s important that we all know ourselves well enough to know what are deal breakers for us–and what we consider workable behavior is, because treating deal breaker behavior like it’s workable behavior is how (and one [...]

Projection is where a person (subconsciously) takes their “uncomfortable” thoughts, feelings, and actions and “projects” them (like a movie projector) onto someone else in an effort to ease themselves of the cognitive dissonance that their [...]

Does your relationship leave you feeling confused? Do they threaten to be dating others but then say they were joking and you are crazy for believing their “joke?” Does the person you are dating seem [...]

Going “no contact” can be difficult. It helps to prepare yourself as much as possible. 1. Familiarize yourself with the seven different types of abuse and several examples of each, as well as the different [...]

Once we get out of a relationship with a narcissist and look back it is very common to blame ourselves for having fallen for their manipulations and lies. This is because we have enough emotional [...]

Some types of abusive behavior is more overtly problematic than others. Many people in abusive relationships tend to stay in them thinking that they aren’t abusive if they can still “handle” being in them.  In addition, [...]

It’s very normal and healthy to feel angry after being used, abused, or exploited–especially by someone you cared about (or by someone that you thought cared about you).  The challenge that many survivors of narcissistic [...]

It's very normal and healthy to feel angry after being used, abused, or exploited--especially by someone you cared about (or by someone that you thought cared about you).  The challenge that many survivors of narcissistic abuse face is how to handle and work through what feels like overwhelming amounts of anger and rage.  In this episode I talk about how to become an "emotional alchemist" and some alternate ways to understand and harness the power of anger so that it works for you. 

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Do you have a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath in your life, or think that you might? Are you in (or recently out of) of a relationship that you can only describe as crazy making, toxic, or like a lifetime TV movie? Then you are in the right place.

The live streams are a time where we "meet" every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST to ask questions, and give answers and support. I give my two cents, as do many of the other people in the chat. If you can't make it to the live stream, you can email me your question at: [email protected] I get a lot of questions, but I do my best to bring up and answer as many of them as I can each week. :)

To get support: www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com/forum

* This is an "open" group, meaning that anyone can see what you are posting, however, you can choose your own screen name and have total privacy that way.

Support Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse/

*This is a "closed" group, meaning that your Facebook friends can see that you are in the group, but they CAN'T see what you are posting (although it looks like they can, as you can see the chat on your timeline--but they really can't so don't panic.)

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse

YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse

Disclaimer: I am not a therapist, doctor, attorney, or expert in narcissism.

My goal with these videos is to share all of my lessons learned, as well as to start many important conversations about abuse, and recovery with the hopes that together we can bring about all of the clarity, closure, and healing possible.

Remember: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And yes, you really can heal from this.

Trauma bonding, a term developed by Patrick Carnes, is the misuse of fear, excitement, sexual feelings, and sexual physiology to entangle another person.

Trauma bonds can prime a person to confuse intensity with sincerity. Bad times bond people as strongly as good times...perhaps even more so.

People that are in abusive relationships tend to hang in there until they can't hang in there anymore (or they are discarded)--and in part this is thought to be due to trauma bonds.

Stockholm syndrome is a psychological condition that causes hostages to develop sympathetic sentiments towards their captors, often sharing their opinions and acquiring romantic feelings for them as a survival strategy during captivity. These feelings, resulting from a bond formed between captor and captives during intimate time spent together, are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims. Generally speaking, Stockholm syndrome consists of "strong emotional ties that develop between two persons where one person intermittently harasses, beats, threatens, abuses, or intimidates the other."

Keep in mind that the only sincere apology is changed behavior--anything else is either them deluding themselves or manipulating you (or a combination of both).

From the full livestream October 19th 2016
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Do you have a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath in your life, or think that you might? Are you in (or recently out of) of a relationship that you can only describe as crazy making, toxic, or like a lifetime TV movie? Then you are in the right place.

The live streams are a time where we "meet" every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST to ask questions, and give answers and support. I give my two cents, as do many of the other people in the chat. If you can't make it to the live stream, you can email me your question at: [email protected] I get a lot of questions, but I do my best to bring up and answer as many of them as I can each week. :)

To get support: www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com/forum

* This is an "open" group, meaning that anyone can see what you are posting, however, you can choose your own screen name and have total privacy that way.

Support Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse/

*This is a "closed" group, meaning that your Facebook friends can see that you are in the group, but they CAN'T see what you are posting (although it looks like they can, as you can see the chat on your timeline--but they really can't so don't panic.)

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram: ThriveAfterAbuse

Disclaimer: I am not a therapist, doctor, attorney, or expert in Narcissism...or anything at all really. If anything, I am a student of life, love, behavior and behavior change, and a woman who is dedicated to thriving.

Professionally, I worked as an advocate for victims of domestic violence at a domestic violence shelter, and currently I am a psychiatric nurse. Personally, I have been through two relationships with narcissists, and have been able to not only survive those, but have been able to move forward and thrive.

My goal with these videos is to share all of my lessons learned, as well as to start many important conversations about abuse, and recovery with the hopes that together we can provide the clarity, closure, and healing that we all deserve.

Remember: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And yes, you really can heal from this.

Are you having a hard time figuring out whether or not you should stay or go?

Ask yourself the following:

Are you are being treated with dignity and respect and honesty?

Is the communication open, honest, sincere, and solutions oriented?

Is there honesty and trust?

If any ONE of these elements are missing, then you are not in a relationship--you are in a manipulationship.

 

If you are wanting to see if things could change, then ask yourself what kind of changes you'd need to see and in what time frame?

Figuring out what these answers look like will help you either stay or go. Because if you don't have a solid set of deal breakers or a solid sense of a time frame, then you can spend your whole life being dragged through hell, holding onto hope that hopefully some day things will be different.

The clearer you are about your situation, the better decisions you will be able to make. (((HUGS)))

Do you have a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath in your life, or think that you might? Are you in (or recently out of) of a relationship that you can only describe as crazy making, toxic, or like a lifetime TV movie? Then you are in the right place.

From the live stream October 12th, 2016
The live streams are a time where we "meet" every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST to ask questions, and give answers and support. I give my two cents, as do many of the other people in the chat. If you can't make it to the live stream, you can email me your question at: [email protected] I get a lot of questions, but I do my best to bring up and answer as many of them as I can each week. :)

To get support: www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com/forum

* This is an "open" group, meaning that anyone can see what you are posting, however, you can choose your own screen name and have total privacy that way.

Support Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse/

*This is a "closed" group, meaning that your Facebook friends can see that you are in the group, but they CAN'T see what you are posting (although it looks like they can, as you can see the chat on your timeline--but they really can't so don't panic.)

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram: ThriveAfterAbuse

Disclaimer: I am not a therapist, doctor, attorney, or expert in Narcissism...or anything at all really. If anything, I am a student of life, love, behavior and behavior change, and a woman who is dedicated to thriving.

Professionally, I worked as an advocate for victims of domestic violence at a domestic violence shelter, and currently I am a psychiatric nurse. Personally, I have been through two relationships with narcissists, and have been able to not only survive those, but have been able to move forward and thrive.

My goal with these videos is to share all of my lessons learned, as well as to start many important conversations about abuse, and recovery with the hopes that together we can provide the clarity, closure, and healing that we all deserve.

Remember: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And yes, you really can heal from this.