Too Old For This Sh*t

Today, I’m joined by Madam Bella Cummins, the proprietor of Nevada's only true female-owned brothel, bringing nearly 40 years of experience as a Madam to our discussion. We delve into the nuanced landscape of legalised prostitution, shedding light on ongoing efforts to reduce stigma, promote safety, and ensure consent within the profession.

We explore her advocacy for sex workers' rights through the Onesta Foundation, the shift from 'prostitute' to 'courtesan,' and the recognition of sex work and the human need for connection. 

We also tackle the societal judgement faced by those in the industry, underscoring the importance of open dialogue.

Discover more about Madam Bella's mission and advocacy at the https://onestafoundation.org/  Her website www.bellas*dot*us;  X: Bellashacienda  

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Content note: This episode contains sensitive content, discretion is advised.

Breaking free from societal expectations of beauty, body image, and identity. In this empowering episode we cover the power of listening to the body's signals, questioning societal narratives, and approaching ageing with grace and self-respect. Including the Compliance vs Defiance Mode of Operating in relation to those and all of life.  

We unpack the dangers of seeking external validation and discuss the significance of self-validation, interdependence, and the complex relationship people have with food.

We delve into Ximy's personal experiences with health challenges and her transition from a vegan lifestyle to embracing holistic health principles focused on self-nourishment. If you want to learn more, join Ximy in her holistic program: 7 Body Basics. 

Ximy is from Columbia and lives in DR, Caribbeans. She worked in entertainment, fitness, holistic health and beauty. She now helps women reconnect with themselves going from vanity to the pursuit of self-care. 

Find Ximy Gonzalez: bombshellformula.com; instagram.com/bombshellformula/; linkedin.com/in/ximena-gonzalez-467273179  

Music by Peter Walsingham

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Three scientists won the Nobel Prize in Physics in 2022 for proving Quantum Entanglement is real! We delve into its fascinating world and philosophical implications on human connections and the universe. Lindsay, an astrophysicist with expertise in space policy, breaks down complex scientific concepts like wave function collapse and quantum mechanics into digestible analogies (organizing chopsticks). 

We explore how quantum entanglement might explain the deep interconnectedness between people and life's synchronicities. The conversation also touches upon Lindsay's passion for the impact of dark skies on our appreciation of the cosmos, and light pollution's effect on our wellbeing. 

We also discuss the power of individual decisions and the butterfly effect on shaping our lives and the universe at large. Lindsay's passions for art and science make her a captivating guest, effortlessly blending them into our discussions, making advanced science topics fun and accessible.

Find Lindsay:

• lindsaydemarchi.com
• linkedin.com/in/lindsay-demarchi
• Petition Your Mayor: Use Our Email Template to Reduce Light Pollution here:

  https://forms.angie-s.com/ep103

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

• 📬 Want the good stuff I don’t share anywhere else? Hop on my email list
• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

After getting out of debt, Tawnya dedicated herself to help others do the same. She shares how to create a budget to help break free from living paycheck to paycheck. It's not always easy, but it's worth it.

We cover:

// The impact being broke has on your health. 

// Why getting into debt is so common and normalised. 

// The first steps you need to take to get out of debt.

// Budget fluctuates. 

// Is it an income issue or a spending issue?

// What can you afford, how much should you spend on rent? Plus other % to know based on your income.  

// Out of the box ideas to get out of debt.

// Why people relapse into debt.

// Should everyone have a budget?

// How to still enjoy yourself when budgeting and saving money.

// What is an emergency fund and what should it be used for?

// Her thoughts on the F.I.R.E. movement.

// How your past with money doesn’t have to equal your future.

// Why buying a house is not always the best financial option.

// Should you buy a new car or a second hand car?

Am taking a little break (more details shared in the intro of the episode) but I’ll be back soon!

Find Tawnya www.themoneylifecoach.com &  https://instagram.com/tawnyaschultz

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

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• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

The ethics of AI: AI is neutral but how it’s coded and used will determine if it’s good or bad for us. Here’s the catch: its development is based around profit and private companies are racing each other for it. This race is not democratically run and we have no regulations in place to manage AI’s warpspeed advances and without fail-safes it’s a gloomy prospect.

We also cover the link between Green energy, lithium, AI and Tesla. If one day things go south with lithium’s import, will sending that one email be as expensive as heating our home? 

Not all gloom and doom, we also touch on the advantages of having AI in our lives. 

Tune in to find out what can be done to avoid the worst and manage our world with AI already deeply embedded in it. Hear all of this from today’s guest Scott Sereboff with 25+ years in surveillance and security technologies. This includes everything from cameras to AI and biometrics. Recorded on the 27th Apr 2023. 

Find Scott at http://www.us-deepingsource.io His podcast: The Privacy of Me https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-privacy-of-me/id1670242621 

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

• 📬 Want the good stuff I don’t share anywhere else? Hop on my email list
• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

Today with Mac, a NY Couples Therapist, we talk about this new era of where men are opening up more and how to navigate this new paradigm. Mac specialises in infidelity recovery, black men going to therapy and recovering from narcissism and porn addiction.

We go over

+ Discerning between good and bad advice on the internet. Are they voicing an opinion or educating on relationships?

+ Why men (tend to) cry by the 5th session in couples therapy with Mac. 

+ What makes a man feel unappreciated, unseen and feels as a 2nd thought in relationships. 

+ The misunderstanding behind ‘Happy wife, happy life’.

+ The identity crisis and struggles for men today. How do you balance gender roles in this modern society?

+ Men and women are after the same in the relationship but get them fulfilled differently: Mac shares a solution that fits both.

+ How much can we open up to a partner?  

+ How does a man feel listened to?

+ How does a couple end up in therapy?

+ Representation in the therapy world and how important it is. 

+ Finishing up with a fun fire round of: The 5 worst relationship advice according to Mac.

Find Mac on Insta @ talk2mac_therapist/  + his podcast: Ménage À Mind

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

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• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

Ever wondered how someone is exonerated after 28 years in prison? Innocence Projects are doing an insane amount of work to make that happen. 

Today with Louise, Director of The Innocence Project London, we talk about what they do for the wrongfully convicted.

Dr Louise Hewitt has many accolades but the one that stands out to me is the pro bono work she’s been doing for over 13 years at the Innocence Project London (IPL). 

We go over:

+ Claiming back your innocence and why it’s such a lengthy process?

+ Are the requirements to get your case reviewed fair or not?

+ Various types of wrongful convictions: Joint enterprise liability & mistaken eyewitness identification.

+ How good storytelling from a prosecutor can sway a jury against you.

+ How does she know if her clients are genuinely innocent and not just playing her?

+ Is anyone more vulnerable to be wrongfully convicted?

+ The look of innocence: our misconceptions and ideas. Are there parameters in place to combat bias in the justice system?

+ Different categories of prison.

+ Even when exonerated, can you ever remove the stain - Is that injustice ever made right again?

+ What to do if you’re arrested for a crime you didn’t do. 

+ The lack of legal aid funding and how she keeps going. 

+ The empathy for the individuals in prison as being part of our society. 

+ The ripple effect of the innocence project.

+ Could a world without IPL ever exist?

+ The future of IPL.

+ Being pardoned and wanting your name back.

Mentioned in the episode: Maria Konnikova (journalist) & John Huffington (exonerated) 

This is an episode that is very important to me, what the Innocence Project London does is not easy but very important work that requires tenacity and support. I hope this episode will go some way in giving them support.

Find Louise & Innocence Project: www.iplondon.org 

Twitter & FB: @innocencelondon   

Insta: @innocenceprojectlondon/

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

• 📬 Want the good stuff I don’t share anywhere else? Hop on my email list
• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

Content note: This episode contains sensitive content, discretion is advised.

Are memories reliable? Memories can be implanted or misremembered and be used against you or someone else. Not always knowingly but it happens. 

Today with Kevin, Director of Communications for the British False Memory Society. We go over what they are, when they occur and we can protect ourselves from others [therapists, police and other officials] to implant memories in us.

We go over:

// Recovered memories and regression therapy. 

// What got him in this line of work.

// Repressed memories vs the evolutionary advantage of (partly) forgetting pain (like childbirth & heartbreak). 

// Why do some have no recollection of their childhood or teenage years?

// You never remember where you left your keys but remember what I told you May 10th 1997 at 10am….what is that about???

// Which parts of our memories can we trust?

// Is photographic memory real?

// Eyewitness testimonies leading to so many being wrongly identified and convicted.

// Misremembering vs forgetting 

// Implanting memories. 

// Doctoring photographs used to implant false memories.

// Implanting memories in police cross-interrogation. 

// The impact of deepfake videos and how to protect ourselves. 

// Is the legal system equipped for preventing false memories?

// Someone’s truth is not always the truth.

// Stimulating memory.

// The future of memory science.

// Finishing on a positive note on how healing affects our memories for the better.

Content note: This episode contains sensitive content, discretion is advised.

Find Kevin at https://bfms.org.uk/ 

Carol's story: https://bfms.org.uk/tedx-talk-on-carol-felstead-scandal/ 

Book:https://www.amazon.co.uk/Books-Dr-Kevin-Felstead/s?rh=n%3A266239%2Cp_27%3ADr+Kevin+Felstead

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

• 📬 Want the good stuff I don’t share anywhere else? Hop on my email list
• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

Shawn, a trained therapist and now a marriage and relationship expert, specialises in couples who are in business together and whose relationships have either fallen asleep or fallen apart. 

We go over:

// What got her into this line of work.

// Power struggles: Why we have them and how to transcend them.

// Practice makes permanent. 

// The 7 key Emotional Weapons and their Sub-Weapons.

// How we pair up with a partner who has our opposite set of emotional weapons. 

// Emotional weapons unconsciously used to seek compliance.

// How to undo years of relationship damage. 

// Pattern interruption.

// Why do some couples stay together despite the hard times when others break up? 

// What makes a couple unstable.

// Developing emotional safety. 

// Couples that are in business together. The basic things they need to have in place to not kill the romance.

// How couples can be both emotionally and financially profitable when in business together.

// Different ways to overcome negative experiences by letting go of the day before coming home.

// How thoughts are people’s gateway drugs.

Find Shawn @ www.reimaginelove.com

Book: Living For Love  

FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/ReimagineLove

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

• 📬 Want the good stuff I don’t share anywhere else? Hop on my email list
• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

While TO4TS is on a break, check out this revisit of a past favourite episode (#086 When Self-Help Goes Horribly Wrong and How To Prevent It). I will return early 2023 with Season 4!!!

What led to the death of 3 individuals seeking to better their life and looking for enlightenment at a James Arthur Ray 5-day event?

Ray was made famous by the movie The Secret and being featured several times on the Oprah Winfrey show.

Together with Kirby Brown’s mother Ginny, a licensed clinical social worker and her sister Jean, we discuss the perfect storm that led to that tragedy, their mission to stop it from ever happening to anyone else and how self-help can be done safely. 

We cover:

+ How strong minded people can fall victim to the self-help industry.

+ Tools and dirty tactics used by the self-help industry.

+ What may have contributed to James Ray’s situation. 

+ How to not collapse after grief. 

+ The legal system is not yet equipped to advocate for the families of [Self-help gone wrong] victims.

+ How to find self-help organisations that have pledged to do no harm and signed [The Promise].

+ What has changed for them in how they perceive life after Kirby’s passing. 

*Content note: this episode contains sensitive content, discretion is advised*

You can find Seek Safely at: https://www.seeksafely.org/  

The list of red flags: https://www.seeksafely.org/consumers/ 

The book https://www.seeksafely.org/this-sweet-life-book/ 

Social @seeksafely  

Music by Peter Walsingham

✨ Don’t be a stranger:

• 📬 Want the good stuff I don’t share anywhere else? Hop on my email list
• ❤️ If this episode made you think, laugh, or roll your eyes (in a good way), you can support the show here. It helps keep the mics on.
• The podcast host I swear by: Captivate
• 💌 Old school and want to just say hi? Contact me here

*Affiliate link alert: I get a tiny kickback if you sign up. Think of it as buying me a fancy coffee. ☕️

Mentioned in this episode: Guru: The Dark Side of Enlightenment podcast 

If you have been affected and need to talk to someone below are some helplines:

UK: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/ 

Europe: https://www.mhe-sme.org/library/helplines/ 

USA: 

American Foundation of Suicide Prevention

Suicide and Depression Awareness for Student

NAMI Resources on Suicide Prevention

NAMI Resources on Suicide Risk

National Suicide Prevention Hotline - 1-800-273- 8255

Crisis Textline - Text HOME to 741741