Toxic

This past week, Texas decided women can't possibly make rational decisions for their own bodies so they made some laws to guide them. In other words, they removed a woman's right to bodily autonomy under the auspice of caring for "the unborn," restricting any abortion after six weeks which is often well before a woman knows she's pregnant. The unconstitutional law conveniently left men out of the conversation all together and instead placed the burden of childbearing squarely on a woman's shoulders where, let's be honest, it has almost always sat anyhow. While we could rant all day long about the privilege wrapped up in this law or the power and control women continue to face in so many facets of their lives, what we want to talk about today is ... talking. How do you talk about abortion with anti-choice individuals in your life in a rational way that actually explains the logic behind why all women, regardless of circumstance, need the option of abortion? Amanda and Jenna walk through the most common anti-choice excuses ("But, murder?" "But, God?" "But, birth control?") and how one might counter those with some form of, "But, no." Hope this helps, keep fighting the good fight and see you on the streets Oct. 2.

In July 2021, a man named Leslie Scarlett opened fire on two paramedics, then on firefighters trying to put out a house fire he started, as well as the neighbors who ran over to help. Inside the house, police would later discover his girlfriend's body. Local police say Scarlett was suffering from "a mental health crisis" and once again, accountability for one's actions is deflected with the I-couldn't-help-it excuse. Mental health disorders can perpetuate domestic abuse but do not cause them, and the risk of a partner being killed by an abuser increases 500 percent when that abuser has access to a gun, so let's chat about that. Also discussed: the ol' no-spaghetti-straps-rule is back in schools, Mayim Bialik made a feminist faux pas and R. Kelly's trial has finally begun (after way too many years of running a bonafide sex cult).

Larry Nassar, pedophila enthusiast who confused himself for a doctor once, sexually abused some 500 girls, many of whom were U.S. gymnasts and nine of whom were Olympic athletes. He's now spending the rest of his days in a place where he's likely finding out what the other side of abuse feels like but he could have started his stay there much earlier if only there weren't a slew of people who knew he was a pedo and ignored it or tried to pretend they couldn't see it like a cat that hides only its head under the couch but you can clearly still see three-quarters of its body and it thinks it's sneaky but it's actually just kind of dumb in a cute way. THIS story, however, is not cute, so trigger warnings and all that jazz. Jenna and Amanda delve into all the details about Nassar starting at the very beginning and culminating with this year's Toykyo Olympics where it turns out nothing whatsoever has appeared to change as yet another report of sexual assault goes unheeded.

There are lots of reasons to learn self-defense: Being able to put some dude in a headlock when they think they can touch you without your explicit permission is one. Wrestling a bear is another. It's a skill all women should at least have a basic knowledge of because, you know, #men. Tara McClure (@TulsaTara) is a brown belt in jiu jitsu and teaches self-defense classes to women and law enforcement. She also posts some rad self-defense moves on social media that you can learn at home. Come for the education, stay for Tara's cool stories of using her superpowers in real life.

This week, a reporter from the Military Times broke a story of the Army's less-than-stellar response to domestic violence.... again. Army Private Jonathan Lauture liked to beat his wife, but what he didn't like was being interrupted while doing so. When 22-year-old Jason Lindsay came to Lauture's apartment one night in 2019 — witnesses say he was there to help Lauture's wife, who was being assaulted at the time — Lauture shot him six times after Lindsay entered the apartment. From there, a failure of all systems occurred because our world is broken. The Army said, "Let's try to ignore this," and Lauture said, "Thanks, I'll keep beating my wife." Now the Army is trying to say "Oops, our bad," but we're not buying it.

In this episode, Amanda talks about her 7-year-old daughter's hesitation to wear a dinosaur tee-shirt (aka, how to tell your kids gender stereotypes are a bunch of malarky) and then we delve into what the hell happens when men try to tell women they're not allowed to earn, keep or control their own money (spoiler alert: they're not supposed to do that). Financial Planner and survivor Saundra Davis, founder of Sage Financial Solutions (www.sagefinancialsolutions.org) talks with us about reclaiming one's empowerment around money after abuse, how the racial pay gap makes things suckier for survivors of color, and how to plan your financial future (because it won't always be like this).

In another tired attempt at victim-blaming, the Prime Minister of Pakistan, Imran Khan, has proposed his country's rape crisis would be abated if us women would just stop showing so much of our provocative skin suits, but failed to explain why fully covered women, and also children, are raped on the daily. But hey, as long as men don't have to take accountability for anything, why logic? Next, Jenna and Amanda discuss a viral TikTok of a twatwaffle abuser psychologically tormenting his kid for shits and giggles and what kind of lifelong effects domestic violence can have on children. We delve into our ACE scores (find yours here: https://acestoohigh.com/got-your-ace-score/) and talk about why everyone should know theirs in order to get ahead of the shitstorm childhood trauma can cause.

Britney Spears got her turn to speak and told us what we all feared -- her dad's on a major power trip and she's under his complete abusive control. This deserves discussion. In the second part of the episode, Jenna and Amanda discuss a dude named Lusbu Jean, an abusive murderer who killed his girlfriend Natasha Nazien and her 15-year-old son, and shot and injured her other three children in Florida on June 7. The media called it a "domestic outburst of gun violence." I guess, anything to avoid calling it domestic violence or femicide or place any accountability on the murderer behind the gun. How media continues to miss an opportunity to educate the masses on the pattern of power and control that abusers use to keep luring women to their own deaths.

Bill and Melinda gates announced plans to end their 27-year marriage this past May and allegations immediately begin to circle Bill surrounding his penchant for trying to hit on some of his female employees. Dirty, but not predatory. At least ... not yet. Then came some flight logs that showed Bill met with convicted rapist of teenagers, Jeffrey Epstein, on his private jet. Multiple times. And dined with him at some shady exclusive dinners funded by Epstein. Of course, Gates says, "We were business bros" and Epstein says nothing because he's hiding somewhere on Rape Island.... we mean, he's dead because he died by suicide in 2019 while in prison. What is it with men and money and their desire to buy women? Do they just get bored buying gold bathroom faucets after a while? Speaking of men with unlimited amounts of money and power, we also bring Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk into this conversation wherein Jenna schools Amanda on the fact that Musk has a child named Bleep Bleep Bloop.

Welcome to Season 2! Same format, new crop of toxic a-holes. In this episode, Jenna and Amanda give you an update on some of the abusive men we covered in previous episodes — I bet you're curious as to what Marilyn Manson is up to. Oh, just being accused of rape by a fifth woman. Meanwhile, Rep. Matt Gaetz still claims there's nothing wrong with having sex with children. After that, we delve in the amazing and inspiring story of one of our new superheroes, Samra Zafar, a woman with dreams of becoming a doctor who was forced to marry a complete stranger at 16 and, wouldn't you know it, that complete stranger was — you guessed it — abusive and controlling. Relegated to living in their basement with her two children, denied an education, she never gave up hope that someday she'd go to college and find her freedom.