I was going to make a Dougie Adams ref in this description, since 42 and all and so nice and very good, but thinking about Lord of War again fills me with such boredom that you get nothing but this episode, where I really need to start thinking seriously about the cathartic glee me brother and I get when we watch terrible fates befall Jared Leto.

The Weather Man dropped like a lead balloon when it hit theaters in 2005, so we'll drop on IT like a...respect balloon in 2018. 

Here's a bonus episode for you guys! We of course want to maintain the integrity of this hallowed podcast by experiencing each Nicolas Cage movie in order, to better track his development as God's Blessed Acting Boy, but Mom and Dad, released simultaneously in theaters and streaming services January 19th, seemed to be something to experience post haste. Is it worth the break in tradition? Oh heavens, no, but we're gonna talk about it for a bit. Enjoy!

Normally, I'd make a joke here about how Nicolas Cage is the real national treasure in the movie National Treasure, and in fact, I'm positive Josh makes that joke in the intro to the episode, but real talk, he's deadly dull in this one, and we had to suffer through a tired, unenthused Nic Cage for two hours.

This is a solid movie and a good episode, but the most important moment in this show happens in the first couple of minutes when Alex strikes gold for naming the next podcast. Don't you steal it, you bastards.

Finally, our first show recorded in 2018! We get off to a rough, weird start, and I apologize for none of it. Just be happy I cut the bit about monkey semen. Anyway, here's Adaptation, the first legit great movie we have watched for this podcast in what feels like ten thousand years.

Thanks to holidays being holidays, this episode was recorded just before Christmas, and Alex was a dumbass and forgot to upload it. Thankfully, we were talking about Sonny, a movie nobody in their right minds should be watching. Nic Cage dun goofed on this one hardcore.

Man, who'd have thought that John Woo could make a war movie this BORING?

This picture is even more of a slog than The Family Man because there's no one as odious as Brett Ratner involved in Captain Corelli's Mandolin, aside from it being a Weinstein-era Miramax production. It's just a dull, dull movie where no one making it looks like they're having fun, even when they're supposed to be having fun on sun-dappled Greek coasts.

Welcome to our Christmas special...in November. The Family Man is so dull that the best we could do is try and pivot into a holiday special halfway through, but indeed we cared about as little for the magic of Christmas as the makers of this film did.

Fuck Brett Ratner.