TRUSTED by your Teenager with Kristen Duke

Michelle Kaley is a force to be reckoned with. She is a fighter, and when you hear her story about parenting with cancer, I know you will agree.  And that is not the only mountain she has had to climb.  Michelle talks briefly about surviving an abusive childhood.  She also shares the unique way she met her husband and tells us about owning a dance studio that put her through college.

She is a mama bear who always fights for her babies.  First through her struggle with postpartum depression.  Then later helping her her son who was diagnosed with low functioning, non-verbal Autism. 

She did her research and found some amazing therapists to assist her in the journey.  And eventually relocated their family for what would be best for him. Listen to how all of that turned out.

Her oldest is a senior in high school, which is a tough transition for any mama, and if that isn't enough, Michelle was diagnosed a year and a half ago with Stage 4 Melanoma which she is currently fighting.

She is learning all about parenting with cancer, and we discuss that bleak word, terminal, and what it means to have stage 4 melanoma. She is optimistic as she looks ahead for treatments, and living life as a dance teacher, and found that distracting herself has been great for her morale.

To "meet" Michelle and see her amazing dance and family pictures, head to the Beyond Good Intentions show notes or on the CapturingJoy.KristenDuke instagram through the hashtag #BeyondGoodIntentionsPodcast

Kristen grew up in a home as the second of Six Sisters. She says her parents had strict rules, and mentions her dads plan to make sure they made it home by curfew. 

She talks about challenges with friends growing up, and how her dad said "Kindness will reflect back" and encouraged her to continue being kind despite what was shown to her.

We talk a lot about her raising her 4 girls, ages 10 and under, and she shared her favorite quote, "Smile and the world will smile with you." She is a great example of this, as one of the kindest, warmest, smiley-est people I know. You'll have to head to my website to see pictures of Kristen and I on a few different adventures. I'm grateful for the blogging world that brought us together 5 years ago.

Towards the end of the episode, you'll hear the bet her dad made with she and her sisters, which is pretty funny, you'll laugh hearing how many followed through and won the bet.

You can find Kristen and her sisters sharing amazing family recipes at Six Sisters Stuff.

Welcome to episode number THIRTEEN! I'VE interviewd my friend Brian Monsen, and I'm delighted to have our 2nd FATHER sharing his thoughts on parenting. 

 My goal is to have a dad represent every 6-8 weeks or so, lets see how I do with that as we move forward! If you missed our first fatherly interview, that was my dad in episode #6. It was SO extensive that I split it into part A and part B. He had a LOT to say, and I'm so grateful for his insights, my example as a truly intentional parent.

My friend Brian has quite positive outlook on life. He lost his dad at a fairly young age, and as the oldest child, he recognized his role as the man of the house after that. He gets emotional as he speaks about his mom and the incredible woman that she is, and the strength she showed after his fathers passing away.

I loved what he shared about volunteering for his kids activities and how he made time, and what he thinks employers think about that.  I think any dad listening would find it helpful.

If you've loved the podcast, I'd love for you to leave a review on iTunes. They don't make it easy to access, but I always go to the magnifying glass at the bottom of itunes and search: beyond good intentions and that is the best place to leave the review. 

I'd love for you to help me continue the discussion by sharing your thoughts over on Instagram, you can find me at @capturingjoy.kristenduke if you aren't already over there. See the picture of Brian and his family. Head to the Beyond Good Intentions home page to find the show notes and other podcast interviews.

I'm so happy to share with you one of my FAVORITE PEOPLE on the podcast today, my grandma! She turns 94 tomorrow, so I thought this was the perfect time to introduce her during her birthday week.

Growing up during the Great Depression, my grandma learned to be thrifty. We start our chat talking about her dad serving in World War I, and how he barely survived.

She then shares a traumatic story from her childhood, how she nearly died as a teenager, her crazy first job out of high school, and meeting my grandpa. It's a miracle to think that I am here today after all of these stories! 

She grew up in the very tiny town of Woodruff, Utah, 20 miles from Evanston, Wyoming. She lived the farm life, and her dad needed help on the farm, and you'll hear why my grandma was the designated helper, and what she refuses to wear to this day!

Though I'd heard the stories before, I never tire of hearing them, so fascinating, such a different time.

I'd LOVE you to leave a review, and share what stood out to you. As always, join me on Instagram and Facebook to discuss your favorite part of this episode. Show notes on the Beyond Good Intentions landing page.

I hope you enjoyed our chat about her growing up. I think just remembering how blessed we are to live in the time we do, use the modern technologies to bring us closer to our families, not drive them away, is how we can live Beyond Good Intentions.

I'm so happy to share with my friend and my 2 daughters piano teacher, Jami Townsend. She is a delight to our family, and I know you will enjoy hearing from her. She is a storyteller at heart with so much enthusiasm for life, and I believe it comes through in our interview.

When I told her about this parenting podcast, she told me what you'll hear her say in our chat, that she was raised a certain way that was a bit more harsh ("spare the rod, spoil the child" corporal punishment she says), and she wanted different for the family she raised, and worked hard to overcome the natural tendencies she was raised with.

I love how she shares the story of when her high school son came home from school one day and told her about a boy he had befriended that was soon to be homeless, and wondered how their family could help.  To hear how her family responded to that situation is tear-worthy.

She is a God-fearing woman, and weaves that into all of her life.

To chat about this episode, join the continued conversation on Instagram or Facebook, tell us your highlight or "a-ha" moments!

You can also find more details and links to her favorite books on the Beyond Good Intentions home page, episode #11. 

I'm on a mission to turn the narrative for the bad rap teens seem to get in this world. Listen to my thoughts on how we could all try a little harder to be a little better.

*See the VIDEO we made: LOVE a Teen Today

*Leave a comment there about a fabulous teen you know

*Spread the word and SHARE the video

*Read the blog post: Treating Teens with Respect

#LoveATeenToday

I look up to my friend Amy quite a bit. Not only did she introduce me to the blogging world (you'll hear that story), and inspiring me regularly with her creativity, but she is also a mom to 5, whose kids are just a touch older than mine.

I was thirsty to hear her thoughts on many parenting topics, and boy did we cover them! From family bonding through hard work, a funny toddler story, to dating and curfews and jobs around the house. We also discussed her thoughts on her oldest graduation high school and currently serving a full time mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a.k.a. Mormon.

We share the same faith, and my son will likely serve a mission in a little over a year, so the topic is quite sensitive to my heart. I didn't quite break out into tears in our conversation, but my eyes were definitely stinging as she shared her thoughts on that topic. We also discussed their family motto, No Empty Chairs, and what that means to her.

Share your thoughts on Instagram or Facebook with #BeyondGoodIntentionsPodcast or leave a review on iTunes! Read the show notes with links to favorites over at the Beyond Good Intentions home page.

"We can't change who our kids are, we need to model how to deal with internal struggles so they will model us."

"Shame hides in privacy, and I wanted to appear perfect in every way, so I hid my eating disorder from my parents."

"Notice the good things kids do and recognize it, it will open the pathways of communication. Look at their eyes."

"Have patience with yourself. Little things lead to big life changes."

Welcome to episode #8 where I talk to Monica Packer, a fellow podcaster, and actually my MENTOR in the podcasting world. She has held my hand through the process of my starting this little passion project, and cheering me on, and for that I've been so grateful. We've never even met, but she's been so patient with me and my incessant questions!

 Monica refers to herself as a recovering perfectionist, with the motto "Life is about progress, not perfection." She shares her thoughts on this in Her podcast titled, @AboutProgress and it is the only one I check each week. She interviews people who are striving to better themselves everyday, with interesting stories that I love. When I first heard her podcast and speaking about her journey with perfectionism, it really changed my mindset about how I need to understand the mind of a perfectionist, because I have children with those similar tendencies, and at times it worries me. Though I feel far from that way of thinking { I've been chastised when I refer to myself as "lazy."} I've been grateful to hear how I can help my kids not put so much pressure on themselves. 

She says she struggled with eating disorders from age 11 through college when she final realized enough was enough. Though she grew up in a loving, supportive household, she wanted so badly to be "perfect" that she didn't want to share her eating disorder with her parents. A reminder to me that sometimes we can do "all the things" we think we should, but our children will still make their own choice and often HIDE THINGS FROM US!

I hope you'll hop on over to Monica's website, podcast, instagram at AboutProgress.com, or @AboutProgress on Instagram or searching it on itunes. I really admire her for sharing her story, in order to benefit others. Discuss this episode and others with me over at CapturingJoy.KristenDuke on Instagram.

PLEASE CONSIDER LEAVING A REVIEW ON ITUNES IF YOU LOVED THIS EPISODE OR OTHERS! Yes, I'm yelling...and begging...

"Comparison is the thief of joy. You are the only you. Don't try to be like someone else."

My friend Jennifer Borget is fabulous, and I'm delighted to share our chat with you, about her life. Growing up in suburban Georgia the oldest of 5 kids, Jennifer noticed she was a minority, but never felt affected by racism, thankfully, but definitely noticed later on an insensitivity from some people. She talks about the importance of teaching her children to know their black heritage and understand how things used to be different by finding great children's books that teach about black history, and help them feel empowered.

We discussed her career as a journalist working at a news station, her husband as the stay at home dad for a while, then ultimately not just her staying home, but HOMESCHOOLING HER KIDS!  Talk about a variety of parenting experiences! Her kids are still young, so she's still looking ahead to teenage years and all that comes with that. But don't worry, we still discuss electronic time and jobs around the house.

At the end, she shares some of her favorite books to read to her kids, a set I'd never heard of before, and why she loves them so much, even to the point of getting emotional when she reads them.  I'm anxious to find them to read to my kids! 

 As a reminder, I'l be chatting about this episode over on the Capturing Joy with Kristen Duke Facebook and Instagram pages, so come share your favorite parts of our discussion. If you leave a review, I'd REALLY appreciate it, about the podcast as a whole, or episode #7 with Jennifer.

See links to Jennifer's favorites on her show notes page on KristenDuke.com here: Homeschooling, finding your purpose, and teaching your kids about racism. 

Welcome back to the interview with my dad, Norman Hill, you've successfully found Episode #6b.  This is the second half of our interview about intentional guilt free parenting.

At first you'll hear a little personal father/daughter therapy session discussing my getting into college after struggling academically in high school. I thought about cutting that part out wondering if anyone needed to hear that, but I felt an impression to keep it in there for the parents who are maybe frustrated that their kids don't have straight A's, and hear my dads thoughts on ME not doing so great in school.

After that story, he gives some nuggets about how children can become addicted to praise, and how we need to retrain ourselves as parents. You'll then hear not one of my dads proudest moments as we tell a story from my growing up years.

His thoughts on consistency in parenting might surprise you, because it did for me! He talks a bit about being a grandparent, then he closes with some gems from a 50 year Harvard study on parenting and what really makes a difference in raising thriving children to adults.

For my favorite quotes and links to the books he mentioned, head to this episode full show notes: Guilt Free Parenting on the Beyond Good Intentions section of my website. 

As always, iTunes reviews help SOOO much, so does interacting with us on Instagram and Facebook under the family picture, so come on over and share your thoughts and lingering questions!