Episode 19: T.T.TK.U.U.A.N. #3

What’s up, Chaos Cousins—welcome home, bitches (Lex said it, not Sloan 💅).

This week is pure silly goose chaos to cleanse your emotional palate, and somehow it still spirals. Sloan brings part two of her full-blown identity crisis where—brace yourselves—she went on dates with MEN???? Yes. Plural. On purpose. For science. For therapy. For chaos.

Lex, meanwhile, delivers the most unhinged Elf on the Shelf story you’ll ever hear—featuring tongs and a child absolutely fighting for her life after making accidental contact. Trauma? Yes. Hilarious? Also yes.

And just when Sloan thinks she’s recovered, she shares the pickup line fumble that humbled her to her core. We’re talking life-altering, ego-bruising, 3AM ceiling-staring embarrassment. (“You too” has never hit harder.)

Moral of the story: trust your instincts, don’t touch the elf, and if you have a hot one-liner—COMMIT.

Send us your funniest “things that keep you up at night."

Email us: ⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠

Remember: write it like a story — bullet points don’t flow — and send it as a .pdf if ya nasty.

We support and encourage therapy. If you are looking for a licensed therapist visit: https://https//www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

We are not here to heal you, just to keep you company between sessions.

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okay love you bye,

Sloan & Lex

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