God instructed the Israelites, ‘If there is among you a poor man…you shall open your hand wide to him’ (vv. 7-8 NKJV). Giving is the loftiest level of living. Generous people focus their time and effort on what they can give to others, not what they can get from them. And the more you give, the better your attitude becomes. Many people don’t understand this concept. They think the amount you possess determines the amount you should share. It’s not what you have that matters; it’s what you do with what you have. And that’s determined by your attitude. A famous saying puts it this way: we make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. And serving others is something you can start doing today. Whether it means spending more time with your family, mentoring an employee who shows potential, helping people in your church or community – it’s about putting your own desires on hold to bless someone else. The Bible says, ‘Speak out for justice! Stand up for the poor and destitute!’ (Proverbs 31:9 MSG). The only way to maintain an attitude of generosity is to make a habit of giving of your time, attentiveness, money, and resources. Author Richard Foster says, ‘Just the very act of letting go of money, or some other treasure, does something within us. It destroys the demon [of] greed.’ Think about what you’re already giving, what you’ve been asked to give, and what you would like to give. Your reasons for granting or denying a request for financial help may be valid, but are they godly? Think about how it feels when you give, and let that be your guide.

At creation God said something interesting about us: ‘Let them rule.’ In other words, He invested you with full authority for managing your life. You serve as His agent on earth to make sure His will is done. But beware. Satan will try to get you to hand your rule over to him, or deceive you into believing you have no power and he has it all. Or else he’ll encourage you to rule your life based on your own skewed judgments and distorted views. It’s not until you rule with wisdom and walk according to the precepts of God’s Word, that you enter into a complete and comprehensive realisation of His design for your life. God reigns over all, but He has given you dominion in your sphere of influence. ‘The heavens are the heavens of the LORD, but the earth He has given to the sons of mankind’ (Psalm 115:16 NASB). God empowers you to make right choices and decisions, and tailors His reactions to your actions. Sometimes we sit around waiting for God to act, when the truth is, He’s waiting for us to make a move. One pastor writes that God ‘has maintained a base of sovereign boundaries, a sphere He will not allow [people] to trespass on…[but] simultaneously opened up a field where we get to call the plays, leaving Him to respond accordingly.’ For example, if you want to reap bountifully, you must sow generously. If you want to be forgiven, you must forgive others. And if you want to walk in His blessings, you must walk in obedience. You are called to ‘reign in life by…Jesus Christ’ (Romans 5:17 KJV).

Pastor Andy Stanley writes: ‘As you move forward in your relationship with God, occasionally He will test your grip on your wallet. It’s a faith thing…every so often, God will prompt you to step out of your generosity comfort zone. And if you really want to keep God in control of your finances, you need to follow. There’s a line you must be willing to cross. You must be willing to go where you can’t rely on your own financial stockpiling, but only on the Lord Himself as your provider. I’m not talking about acting irresponsibly with your money. I’m talking about an attitude in which God’s voice is louder than the soundtrack of “what ifs” in your life. You can think of that line as the “what if” line. You’ll know you’re getting close to it when your desire to follow your generosity is met by thoughts like, What if the interest rates change? or What if inflation picks up?…that line is different for everybody…As frightening as it might feel at times, God gives us financial seed for one purpose: sowing. Unless we open our palms and let the seed fly, we will never know what fruit He might bring from it.’ Here’s a biblical principle that you can always be certain of: ‘Whoever sows generously will also reap generously’ (2 Corinthians 9:6 NIV). When you take that step of faith and cross the ‘what if’ line, God promises, ‘You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion’ (v. 11 NIV). Go ahead; start to sow and watch what happens.

Jesus gave this advice to a group of people who were anxious about their finances: ‘Don’t worry about these things…your heavenly Father already knows all your needs…and he will give you everything you need’ (vv. 31-33 NLT). He will do this from day to day, if you live for Him and make the kingdom of God your primary concern. What do you fear most? Not having enough money, or not having God’s blessing on your finances? If your fear of not having enough is trumped by your fear of missing out on God’s involvement in your finances, you’ll invest in something that can’t fail – God’s kingdom. You’ll sow generously, and as a result you’ll experience a peace that can’t be explained rationally and a joy that comes from knowing God is your backer, your banker, and your blesser. The Bible talks about ‘casting all your care upon him, for he careth for you’ (1 Peter 5:7 KJV). None of us can escape financial uncertainty. As one pastor writes, ‘When the unexpected rolls around, we will be affected. Our net worth, and possibly our income, will be impacted.’ And at times like that when everything seems up for grabs, we long for the assurance that we’re not alone. We want to know with certainty that when we cast our financial cares on our heavenly Father, He will, in fact, take good care of us. Ironically, financial peace of mind doesn’t come from hoarding and withholding, but from giving when it doesn’t seem to make sense. It’s your willingness to give now that guarantees God’s promise to give back to you when you need it. That’s why it’s imperative to sow generously any time you can.

Jesus said, ‘Don’t you have a saying, “It’s still four months until harvest”?…open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest.’ Someone close to you today may be in desperate need of God’s love. Wouldn’t it be worth risking rejection to find that one who’s ready and willing to respond? The fact is, you may be the only Christian they will meet – or meet today. So if you don’t tell them, who will? Generally speaking, there are five reasons we don’t share our faith more often. 1) We think it’s the preacher’s job to do it (see Acts 1:8). 2) We aren’t certain about our own salvation (see 1 John 5:13). 3) We’re afraid of being rejected (see Luke 12:8-9). 4) We’ve never taken personal responsibility for learning how to share our faith (see 1 Peter 3:15). 5) Our love for Christ has grown cold (see Revelation 2:4-5). Josh McDowell tells of a corporate headhunter who liked to get potential executives relaxed, then look them square in the eye and ask about their purpose in life. Most were shocked and fell apart under the question. One day after talking for a while to a man named Bob, the headhunter leaned over, looked into his eyes and said, ‘And what’s your purpose in life?’ Without blinking, Bob replied, ‘To go to heaven and take as many people with me as I can.’ The headhunter said, ‘For the first time in my career I was speechless.’ Today, someone’s eternal destiny may rest on your willingness to share God’s love with them. That’s your God-given assignment – so tell them about Jesus.

The Bible says: ‘If you are guided by the Spirit, you won’t obey your selfish desires. The Spirit and your desires are enemies…always fighting each other and keeping you from doing what you feel you should’ (vv. 16-17 CEV). Sound familiar? Here are four keys to winning the daily battle between your old and new natures. 1) Be honest. Acknowledge that your flesh will always crave satisfaction in the wrong things – and it never takes a day off. 2) Be humble. Acknowledge that you’re powerless to win the battle without God’s help. By committing yourself to God, you draw on His strength in those first crucial moments of each test. And your ability to do that will grow as you practise this spiritual discipline. The closer you draw to God, the stronger you become when faced with temptation and trouble. 3) Be disciplined. This is a personal matter; no one else can do it for you. Paul writes, ‘You must not give sin a vote in the way you conduct your lives’ (Romans 6:12 MSG). If someone else has to restrain you, it doesn’t work! 4) Be alert. As a soldier David should have known better, but Satan caught him off guard with his defences down. As a result he ended up committing adultery with Bathsheba, then having her husband put to death in an attempt to cover it up. Maybe you think it couldn’t happen to you. Paul, the greatest of the apostles, wrote, ‘I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize’ (1 Corinthians 9:27 NIV).

The secret to surviving hard times doesn’t lie in what you know, but who you know. You say, ‘Right now I’ve got more troubles than Job.’ Well, when the bottom dropped out of Job’s world, he said: ‘He knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold. My feet have closely followed his steps; I have kept to his way without turning aside. I have not departed from the commands of his lips; I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread’ (Job 23:10-12 NIV). And Paul’s life wasn’t a picnic either: ‘I have been in danger from rivers…from bandits…from my fellow Jews…from Gentiles; in danger in the city…in the country…at sea; and in danger from false believers. I have laboured and toiled and…often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and…often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches’ (2 Corinthians 11:26-28 NIVUK). Reading that list makes us ask the question, ‘How did he do it?’ Paul knew the secret to surviving hard times. What was it? He allowed his troubles to drive him closer to the Lord: ‘I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong’ (2 Corinthians 12:9-10 NIV). Do you want what Job and Paul had? Then draw closer to the Lord – that’s the secret!

It’s never okay to explode at those God has entrusted to your care. The Bible says, ’Don’t get so angry that you sin. Don’t go to bed angry and don’t give the devil a chance’ (Ephesians 4:26-27 CEV). Satan would like nothing better than to gain entry to your home and turn it into a living hell, and every time you fly into a rage, you lose ground to him. That’s why the Scriptures say, ‘It’s smart to be patient, but it’s stupid to lose your temper.’ The key to managing your anger lies in finding healthy ways to express it so that it doesn’t end up hurting more than helping. It’s important to share your feelings, but you must always do it in the right way. Ultimately it’s not about who’s right and who’s wrong, or who can shout the loudest. It’s about finding the solution that’s best for everyone. Understand this: nobody can be everything you want them to be all the time. It’s impossible to have a long-term, loving relationship without learning to accept human weakness. So instead of dwelling on one another’s shortcomings, focus on your collective strengths as a family. Clinical neuropsychologist Paul Pearsall says, ‘Most of us would give our own life for…a family member, yet we lead our daily life too often as if we take our family for granted.’ Learn to control your temper; your family is worth it. After all, who else loves you regardless of what you do? And where else can you go to find the comfort and strength that comes from that kind of support system?

They say, ‘The apple never falls far from the tree,’ and Jacob certainly proved that. Nearing the end of his life when he should have been preparing to bless his sons Simeon and Levi, he told them, ‘I…curse…you because of your…anger’ (Genesis 49:7 CEV). But their behaviour should have come as no surprise. The fact is, Jacob had already shaped them by his own example when he deceived his father (see Genesis 27) and his father-in-law (see Genesis 30). And his mother facilitated the deception. Behavioural patterns are passed from generation to generation. Your attitudes and actions will either blight your children or bless them. The Word of God says, ‘Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it’ (Proverbs 22:6 KJV). Your children inherit more than just your looks. They end up with the values you taught and the emotional disposition you displayed. Don’t involve them in your marital disputes. The Bible says, ‘Anger rests in the bosom of fools’ (Ecclesiastes 7:9 NKJV), and kids are easy targets for misdirected rage. Even when your outbursts aren’t aimed at them, they still suffer the effects. For example, your boss disciplines you at work, and because you can’t retaliate, you come home like a bear with a headache and make everybody around you walk on eggshells. Lower the decibel level! Don’t let your anger run amok. King David shone on the battle front but struggled on the home front. Perhaps that’s why one of the last psalms reads like this: ‘Help me to guard my words whenever I say something’ (Psalm 141:3 CEV).

Building a good relationship at home is like building a wall: It's done brick by brick. And the mortar that holds it together is unconditional, uncondemning, unselfish love. The only way you'll know how good a job you've done is when it's tested by the storms of life. One of the most important keys to succeeding at home is – communication. So: 1) Become creative. Spend time together as a family. Call your mate during the day and try to meet sometimes for lunch. Drive your kids to school or extracurricular activities so you can talk to them. Communication can happen anywhere, but it won't happen unless you make it a priority. 2) Identify communication killers. Internet, mobile phones and TV are the chief culprits. The average couple spends less than one hour a week in meaningful communication; they spend five times more each day watching television. This is a 'screen test' you'll have to pass if you want to succeed at home. 3) Encourage every member to speak their mind. And when they do, don't criticise or retaliate. Differences of opinion are healthy. Handled right, they can make things better. 4) Be conscious of how you interact with your family. You may have unwittingly adopted a style that stifles communication. Stop and consider; do you: a) retaliate - that has a degrading effect b) dominate – that has an intimidating effect c) isolate - that has a frustrating effect d) cooperate - that has an encouraging effect. If you're in the habit of using any communication style other than a cooperative one, start working immediately to change it. You'll have to, if you want to build a good relationship with your family.