Uncomfortable Friend

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Have you ever been listening to music in the car and immediately get taken to a place where you can feel the love and pain of loss? Just ugly tears rolling down your face, and yet you want to belt it through the roof? In today's episode, I share my "Good Ugly Cry" playlist... songs that have moved me to tears and continue to allow me to feel a special connection with my son, even if it stirs up some pain in the process.

My Song List:

• Drive - Incubus
• I Could Never Say Goodby - Enya
• How Do I Say Goodbye - Dean Lewis
• Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Green Day
• Tears in Heaven - Eric Clapton
• My Immortal - Evanescence
• Landslide - Fleetwood Mac
• I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston 
• In the Arms of the Angel - Sarah McLachlan
• I Will Remember You - Sarah McLachlan
• I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie
• The Scientist - Coldplay
• Learn to Love Again - Pink
• Diamonds - Rihanna

If you'd like to add a song to my "Good Ugly Cry" playlist, have an idea for an episode, or would like to send a message to my son, please email me at: [email protected]

  Until we meet again <3

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Choice is fundamental to our human existence. This week I talk about how choice has affected my personal autonomy, my self-expression, how it's empowered me, helped me to learn and grow, and how it's also a responsibility that I have to myself and those around me. Choice saved my life... understanding that loss and grief wasn't happening to me, and that I had a choice in what I do with it has made all the difference.

References made during the episode:

• My Big Toe - Thomas Campbell
• Chat GPT

If you want to share reflections on how choice has impacted your life, you have an idea for a new episode, you want to be a guest on an episode, or want to send a note to Lincoln, please email [email protected].

  Until we meet again <3

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Parenting is a FULL TIME job that never ends... it can feel impossible to think we are ever doing something right... or when we do something well, the game changes and our kiddos require something different. Today, on the upcoming 5 year anniversary of my son Lincoln's passing, I take some time to discuss some of my parenting highlights through 2023 that have been inspired by him and his impact.

If you'd like to share something you're proud of, have thoughts/ideas for a topic, would like to be a guest to talk about your own journey, or just want to send Lincoln a note, please do so! [email protected].

  Until we meet again <3

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It's probably not surprising that there's a lot of darkness that comes with grief... however, so many people feel scared or ashamed to talk about it. Today I touch on 8 different aspects of the dark side of grief in hopes to shine a light on these very real and human feelings: Guilt, anger, ambivalence, physical symptoms, longevity, existential questions, and loss of safety/control. 

If you have similar or different experiences with the dark side, I'd be honored for you to share them with me. You can check out my website or send Lincoln an email at [email protected]. 

  Until we meet again <3

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Someone recently asked me... "Can you tell me how you decided to make the choice to have children?" If you read the news, the worlds feels like a scarier place every single day. She had heard that I wasn't the "motherly" type growing up and was looking for some data points on my decision, especially since I seem to be extremely content with my choice. That got me thinking, and today I share my thoughts around the decision to have children, especially after loss of a child.

If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: [email protected]. 

  Until we meet again <3

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Does silence make you uncomfortable? Do you find yourself wanting to fill the void with TV, social media, or gaming? Today I explore what happens when you allow for silence, what I've observed, and offer a challenge to those who are listening...

If you'd like to share what revelations you've had with silence, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: [email protected]. 

  Until we meet again <3

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In this episode I explore how I evaluate what would be the response of fear vs. love. I've mentioned a few different times that I think this is the ultimate decision we have, but what does it look like in application? Today I give some examples for my family, my children, my marriage, and at work. What are some situations that you experience where you aren't quite sure what the love response would be?

If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: [email protected].

  Until we meet again <3

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"Shut up, Rachel!"... Rachel is the name I give to the negative critic in my head, not because I've ever met a bad Rachel, but because I most frequently get called Rachel by mistake. Well she is an expert at blame... especially a blame directed toward others. In this week's episode, I talk about how blame shows up for me and what I do about it. I also offer a load of resources to help you learn more about your own internal critic. Send Lincoln a note if you have named your critic too! I'm sure he'd love to hear it.

Resources:

• Illeism - Thanks Dave Stern for giving me vocabulary around this!
• Brene Brown on Blame
• The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
• Gist: The Essence of Raising Life-Ready Kids by Michael W. Anderson, LP, and Timothy D. Johanson

If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: [email protected]. 

  Until we meet again <3

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Establishing true confidence is really tricky. There are so many experiences that can take it away: Failure, criticism, comparison, trauma, shame.... Today I talk about some of my life experiences that broke my confidence, especially the loss of my son and the medical challenges of my daughter, and how some great resources have helped me to re-establish that. If you want to learn more about how to build your confidence, and to use it for good in this world, please take a listen!

Resources mentioned:

• Gist: The Essence of Raising Life Ready Kids
• Pastor Jerry Flowers - Check out his Planted Series! 

If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: [email protected].

  Until we meet again <3

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I feel a sense of relief that I never questioned whether or not I "should" talk to people about Lincoln, especially my kiddos. While I have no clue what's "right", I share how my family has chosen to remember him, some of the items and traditions that we have, some of the conversations I have with my kids, and the surprising questions I've been asked.

Resources:
While not mentioned in the podcast, I wanted to offer some resources on talking to young children about loss. 

• Sesame Street Episodes About Grief
• Helping your child when a loved one dies

If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: [email protected].

  Until we meet again <3