Unlearning Project

Comparison creates competition because without comparison, who are you competing with? Progress without competition is collaboration, the idea that we can all move forward together, in a helpful, supportive way. I'm so sick of the cut-throat, clinical, desperate environment competition creates. Where do we stand in the world though, if we're not competing with anyone? Is some level of comparison absolutely necessary?

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Wisdom, empathy, and brilliance exist in the dark, crushing experiences of life, although that's not apparent while in the midst of them. Loss, emptiness, and helplessness are normal, although negative emotions that we all experience at some point. Resistance only holds us back. Every interpretation or internal story created and the meaning we assign is a choice. Finding yourself is an ongoing life journey.

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My life experience with carrying burdens, chronic pain, and obligations manifested into I irrational fears of the ocean and flying, among other things. Tired of living in fear, I began to attempt to resolve issues that had been haunting me. Anticipation is where fear breeds, growing larger the more attention we give it. The only way to shorten fearful anticipation is through action.

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Fanaticism replaces any inherent joy with obsession. No matter the subject, losing sight of the aim and doubling the efforts creates an unnecessary level of hype and is ultimately unhealthy and unsustainable, not to mention a turn-off. When success in pushing your beliefs onto others becomes more important than your own sanity, we have a problem.

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Western culture tends to focus on achievement and progress. Eastern philosophies are focused on being present in the moment with a calm, quiet mind. I often feel trapped between two worlds. How do we combine forward planning, goals, and action with a sense of inner calm? Is it possible to blend forward progress with a relaxed, but still intentional, approach?

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There are a million details to figure out when someone suddenly becomes dependent, but there's also a huge emotional side. I got a crash course in assisted living, hospice, and eventually, end-of-life planning. It was exhausting, confusing, and sad. Considering my mom's recent passing, this episode is difficult, but also weirdly therapeutic. Don't worry, there no tears, a few laughs instead, and loads of empathy.

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There comes a point in life when traditional measures of "success" aren't as fulfilling as expected and, instead, leave us feeling empty and anxious. We absorb early on that each occurrence has a negative or positive connotation when each event is actually neutral. Life is a journey of awareness and an opportunity to question what we believe, how we respond to people or events, and why.

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Numbers often run through my head in anticipation of the day when I find complete financial freedom and no longer worry about earning money. If I let them, these thoughts can become consuming and, instead of enjoying the time I have right now, I feel like I'm racing against time. What's sustainable though, go too far in either direction and you're in trouble. You want it straight? Slow and steady wins the race.

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A few lessons for the younger me, but would I have listened? Based on your life experience, what you'd tell your younger self is probably different than advice I'd come up with. Everyone's on auto-pilot, barely paying attention, and rarely do we want unsolicited advice. So, is there anything that would have changed our trajectories or altered our decisions? Really?

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With a new story or belief about money, health, addiction, relationships...anything, what could change in your life? If each of us is the hero in our story, instead of the perpetuator of a script created by the prior generation, what could happen differently in each moment? Living a red-lined lifestyle, fearing money, and repeating patterns aren't something we're usually conscious of, but it's time we start to notice.

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