Unofficial

If you’re a dancer, the names Ruth St. Denis, Doris Humphrey and Martha Graham all have deep significance in the development of modern dance in the early to mid part of the 20th century. Even professional dancers today know the history these three masters helped cultivate. Imagine beginning your dance training as a child with Ruth St. Denis, navigating cultural racism while performing with Doris Humphrey and ultimately traveling the world dancing for the great Martha Graham. A name even today’s non-dancers recognize. Our guest today did exactly that. Cristyne Lawson, now 84 years young visits Unofficial and tells her story of beginning her professional dance career at the age of 6 in Santa Monica California, her time at “the old” Juilliard on 125th street and Riverside, her love for everything “Miles” and her auspicious beginnings at the originally named “Colored” Methodist Episcopal Church, (Now Christian Methodist) the recently dubbed Cultural Monument, Santa Monica’s first black Church built before 1900.

This has to be one of our favorite episodes, as Myan’s surrogate grandmother spills the beans on what it was like to be a professional, black, female dancer in the 1940’s, 50’s and 60’s. A story so rare as few found success under similar circumstances at that time in our nation’s segregated history. I love Cristyne and hope she had a great time reliving some of her fondest memories from the most special time in her life. Coop&Myan were honored to have her on the show and will cherish this very special episode and the poignant glimpse into Cristyne’s inimitable journey.

If you thought that geranium you made out of a 2 liter bottle of Schweppes in 2nd grade made you an environmentalist then definitely don’t follow Greta Thunberg because this young lady is taking ocean voyages to avoid air travel to help diminish her unavoidable carbon footprint. That is sustainability. She also coaxed her mom off of the most efficient form of long distance travel as the woman was kicking ass in her professional opera career. I was already scared of having kids for the sheer level of responsibility and now I’ve got to worry about them making me a better person? Love really is all about sacrifice.

Will Trump be impeached? What does it mean to be “impeached?” If you’re impeached are you no longer president? Turns out an impeachment is just a formal accusation of a crime. The House of Representatives impeaches lets say...a president, but then it’s up to the Senate to hold the trial. If the Senate doesn’t vote two thirds majority to convict on the articles of impeachment set forth by the House of Representatives, then the president would simply be acquitted and remain in office. Just like Bill Clinton was acquitted of his impeachment articles, Perjury and obstruction of justice after lying about his sexual relations with that woman…Monica Lewinsky. So to be clear, yes Bill clinton was impeached by the House of Representatives but he was NOT convicted after his trial in the Senate. So he was never removed from office. He finished his remaining two years of his second term and then stole all the “W’s” from every Dell keyboard before leaving the White House. That’s why Al Gore was never president. Also the whole Florida/Supreme Court heist thing. Can we impeach Florida for “obstruction of justice?"

Unofficial is really going off the rails here on a weekly basis. If you’re sick and tired of podcasts with deliberate focus and that are always staying on topic, then you need to check in with Coop&Myan at least twice a week. We’ve even started making our release schedule random, you don’t know what day you’re going to get your dose of random, erratic, arguably superfluous insight. But, we *guarantee, If you listen long enough, you might even learn something.

*not a guarantee

Yeah I guess you can kinda judge this one by the cover. Would you be right though? Is this the episode where Myan’s mom comes on the show and bakes a bunch of cookies? Is she going to tell the story about the time Myan’s pants ripped in the middle of the junior high school recital? Maybe the one about the multitude of hyperdimensional realities existing simultaneously throughout an infinite multi-verse though completely invisible to almost every human that has ever existed because we were designed by an elite alien oligarchy who created mankind as a slave-race as a way of cultivating an organic, sustainable, planet-sized energy generator for our galactic overlords to remotely feed from the frequency of our collective, emotional fear-center energy for a trillion years?

Oooh let’s hope it’s the cookies.

When was the last time you had a baklava croissant? Yeah, me neither! Ok, added to planner. Honestly, how much do we love baked goods? Pastries, danish, turnovers, beignets, financiers? Doughnuts? (that’s a weird word) Do you love them enough to leave the profession you’ve had your sights on since you were a kid? A career you were actively successful in? A passion millions of people would die for and even devote their lives to achieving but never attain?? If so you are among a very elite class of artists along with our very charming guest today, Grace Mumm.

Originally from Iowa and only in LA for about 6 months at the time, 20-year-old Grace had found industry representation, plenty of auditions and was actually working as a professional actor. Dream come true, right? Well not so fast, Tinsel Town…here comes Gjusta. Enamored with LA’s premier bakery, the Venice juggernaut, Gjusta, Grace asked for an application and the rest as they say is history. Almost a year and a half later Grace is a professional baker at one of LA’s finest executors of top-tier scones and sour doughs, is on track for a New York stage with Chef Ignacio Mattos, has "the industry” in her rearview mirror...and she couldn’t be happier. Her commercial agent, not so much.

Coop&Myan do a pretty decent job of keeping Grace off track but in the end we cover her junior year in Germany, the artificial nature of our school system, Chinese doughnuts, the Chicken sandwich wars, the magic of Figs, the demise of Boston Market and even Shark Tank. Yes, Shark Tank.

So check out episode 80 of Unofficial for yet another peek inside an LA artist’s life you would otherwise never know. Everybody is interesting and they all have a story. Next week Myan’s mom drops by for the most embarrassing episode a podcast host can hope to endure. Transparency is a bitch.

When you’re a kid sometimes you think the future will be this crazy, robot infested tech-scape with eye-scanners and personally-targeted advertising like in Minority Report. And then you get a little older and the world still seems a little backwater and pedestrian. But another decade goes by and you find yourself lusting after electric cars with motors that make internal combustion look like an Atari 2600 and before you know it, you’re interviewing a Cyborg on your podcast. A goddamn Cyborg.

Meet Eric Michael Johnson, Unofficial’s first cybernetic lifeform guest. The thirteen inches of fused-steel straightening his otherwise Lombard-esque spinal column makes him more machine than man. Alright he’s still mostly man. Interesting guy too, really funny and he actually experienced a four inch growth spurt in only 8 hours. And for only $260,000. A bargain by today’s cosmetic surgery standards and as a bonus, the 8 hour spinal fusion surgery probably saved his life. A literal silver lining. And of course decent health insurance played a small role. #universalhealthcare. As a kid he also had lordosis and asthma. Add a comically stiff, full back brace his senior year of high school and you have yourself some legit fodder for a decent episode description. Eric lived in 46 states and 13 countries, born on an Airforce base in South Dakota and he makes his own movies. His very first, "White and Nerdy - Michigan Tech Edition” a parody of Weird Al Yankovic’s “White and Nerdy” is still on his Youtube channel, "Darth Hammertime" and has almost 50k views. This guy is just a fun dude to be around, what a cool guest. Oh and he loves 30 Rock, he’s definitely coming back.

Coop&Myan have the coolest job in our Universe, Unofficial is a dream come true and this first year has been like 87% joy. That’s a lot. With a new studio on the Horizon and a real push to be the number one source for exposing the bottomless well of unknown talent in Hollywood, Unofficial is poised on the precipice of unbridled, inimitable success. What does that mean? We really don’t know. But it’s all about the journey, right? Right.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-2VqIhvKQk

How is it that someone like Bernie Sanders can spend his entire career always championing the people while virtually making no political mistakes that can be clearly illuminated for their grave miscalculation yet Joe Biden can be relied upon to continually misstep, fumble and fail yet be named the front runner? But is Joe Biden really the front runner? Are we all so weak of character that simple name recognition is enough or is it possible that he's not really in the lead but the media are simply reading their scripts so that we think he is. Can you see through the smokescreen of modern media propaganda? If you can then you are most likely a proud, card-carrying Bernie bro.

Is socialism dangerous to American capitalism and democracy as some would have us believe? Doesn't America have Medicare, a vast military system, public schools, public library's, tax payer and government funded fire and police departments, unemployment payments and "Social" security? Is it not safe to say that in addition to privately held corporations and wealth we are also a nation rife with social programs. Is that bad?

Cooper is on a tear this week as he questions the future of socialism in America, calls out "fuck boys" for their bullshit and speculates on the lack of apropos assassination. Why are the good ones taken away while the bad ones are here to stay? He's also predicting a best actor Oscar win for Joaquin phoenix for his up-and-coming portrayal of The Joker, which won the golden lion award last month at the Venice film festival. Also Myan shares his theory on why America is the worlds leader in the now grotesquely common practice of mass shootings. It's not pretty and it's not going away so we might as well address the evidence all around us.

Unofficial. Coop&Myan. It's like vitamins for your mind.

Even if Coop&Myan had a tax attorney on the show they’d probably find a way to equate what he/she does to their artistic self. Everything is art and every week Unofficial finds a way to make at least a few minutes of creative artistry using nothing more than two or three brains and the collective content of the human race to this point in history. Gold outta tin cans. Luckily for all of us we have a really special guest this week, she’s young, she’s tall, she’s talented, she’s intelligent beyond her years. She’s the classic quadruple threat. Ali Starrlight, fresh off the release of her new song and video “Bowie Showed Me” (directed and produced by Anna&Lana from 103104 Productions) and which already has thousands of views on Youtube, drops in to Studio J30 for an hour of upbeat, humble genuflection to the artists who have come before us and who continue to inspire us daily.

Ali is only 22 but she speaks as though she were 42. Appreciative of the gifts from the universe and fulfilled in the simplicity of the moment. Not projecting some unattainable, fantasy better-self, always just beyond the cognitive horizon, Ali is an ultra-present, spiritual adult. Ali also started Starr 44 Artist Alliance, an artist community which embraces iconic performers, encourages and supports artists in all mediums and aids in their development through, among other things, quantum physics. Really wish that had come up on the show. Definitely going to ask about that next time. So loved having Ali with us for an hour, it was impossible to ignore her innate ability to light up even our dark, cozy cubicle and we look forward to seeing what artistic norms she will ultimately transcend in the near future. Thanks again, Ms. Starrlight.

So another original adventure from the Unofficial Boys, in the can with more on the way and soon, we’ll be coming to you from our new studio in ironically...Studio City. 2020 is right around the corner and Coop&Myan have yet to run out of human-condition related topics to explore so keep tuning in as we grow and grow. Maybe one day Coop&Myan will be adults too. Fingers crossed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Dw9ieOckv0

Technical difficulties left us with little time for a full length show today but I think Coop&Myan made the most of their limited session. We like to set the bar low so every show is a smashing success.

Complaints about faulty equipment, a protracted discussion on the many different types of modern, alternative milk (and how disgusting they are to we traditional milk fans) and of course how you can be a better person by simply choosing the product 2 inches to the left. Yes the hypocrisy in choosing any cow milk over the other disgusting options is not lost. My apologies.

Organic Valley may not be the most ethical milk you can buy but it sure as hell beats the overalls off of Horizon. Organic Valley cows have almost twice the outdoor pasture-time as Horizon cows and while Horizon operates hundreds of farms, 11 of them being corporate, Organic Valley is America’s largest farmer-owned organic cooperative.

Out of a 0-5 point rating scale the Cornucopia Institute gave an excellent rating of 4/5 for Organic Valley while Horizon received 0/5 and was deemed “ethically deficient.” Read the article in the links for more info.

So check out Unofficial this week and start voting with your dollars by buying better milk. Don’t just run away claiming everybody’s a liar. You can do better, old man.

https://www.coloradoboulevard.net/horizon-vs-organic-valley/amp/

Coop&Myan remember when 50 episodes felt like some crazy number and now at 75 it’s surprisingly the opposite. After a year into Unofficial and only weeks away from a larger studio, it almost feels like we’re just beginning. Maybe it’s because we finally got Erin McIntyre on the show and between her crossfit obsession, newly acquired Masters in Nutrition and super-hot, lawyer boyfriend, the reality of Myan’s physical and dietary inadequacy is palpable. Like a thick cream-based stew with enough calories for a bear cub’s winter hibernation. Could I have found my spirit animal?? Today we also learned that Coop’s cousin is the world’s best crossfitter so Coop is pretty much a crossfit-pro simply through his genetic association and his annual visit to the crossfit gym. He is constantly flexing his biceps only inches from Myan’s face to establish clear, consistent, alpha dominance. He’s tall, young and married too…showoff.

So with all this aggressive, red-meat energy coming from Erin and Cooper today it’s no wonder there are lots of adversarial competitors throughout the show, High Fructose corn syrup vs cane sugar, mass produced corporate cigarettes vs Organic roll-your-own, skiing vs snowboarding, Pilates vs Yoga and of course small, healthy, dietary changes vs Yolo diets. Yes I know it’s "Yoyo" diets but Yolo dieting seemed even more nutritionally cavalier. Don’t act surprised, you knew Myan couldn’t go long without nailing the joke. Ab-soFRUIT-Lyyyyy!!!

So, Erin is fresh out of a lifetime of schooling and with her intelligence, beauty and social aptitude it should be no time at all before she begins her first stepping stone toward success in whatever facets of professional nutrition she decides to explore. And if that doesn’t work out she can always simply shoot for the stars cause then she’ll land among the moon…no wait, how does that go...shoot for the moon and the stars will land and...oh christ just shoot for the tree of goals and the branches will fall among your feet. There, great, nailed it. See you next week.

The boys are back at it again with the 74th installment of Unofficial! Only a handful of episodes left until Coop & Myan head to their new studio in the sunny hills of Studio City. Get comfortable, make a coffee and listen to Myan explain the niceness of the "French family".

Love,

Coop & Myan