Untaming Masculinity

Competition – the activity or condition of striving against one another to gain or win something

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad dive into competition and competitiveness. We live in a world where being competitive is being seen as somehow toxic, but competition brings the best out of men and is necessary. Every man not only craves competition but needs it to push himself.

Whether it’s an athletic endeavor, trying to win the attention of a pretty girl, playing board games with your family, or working toward a promotion at work, men regularly find themselves in competitive situations.

And men want to win.

We are not wired to be apathetic or indifferent. Healthy competition brings out the best in men as it helps them not only level up and be better, but it raises the levels of the men around them. It’s necessary and has been a part of the human condition since the dawn of time.

Yet we live in a world where men are now being judged or torn down for wanting to be competitive and exhibit a desire to win. The resultant apathy has created a generation of weak men, and it’s up to us to change that. It’s important to note that there’s unhealthy competition, fueled by poor emotional responses. Any man can recognize the difference between that and healthy competition that makes men BETTER.

Show highlights and links include:

• Why men are sociologically wired to be competitive
• Competition can also be a personal endeavor
• Why apathy and indifference hurts a man
• Great article from The Art of Manliness
• Relentless by Tim Grover

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Marriage - the legally or formally recognized union of two people as partners in a personal relationship (historically and in some jurisdictions specifically a union between a man and a woman).

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad discuss a topic that may seem controversial, but shouldn’t be. Your wife should always come before your kids. As fathers, it’s very easy to prioritize your children, but putting your kids before your wife can have a damaging and lasting impact.

When you watched your wife walk down the aisle, you promised at that moment to always provide for her, protect her and give her a good life. Then a few years go by and you look up to competing priorities: a job, personal interests, a mortgage, and very importantly, kids. Many men put their kids first and base their lives around their kids, often at the expense of their wife. That erodes marriage and ultimately erodes fatherhood.

The guys discuss why this approach is not ok and how prioritizing your wife both helps your marriage and helps your kids. Kids deserve to have a family ecosystem where they know their dad loves their mom unconditionally and fiercely.

Show highlights include:

• She was there before them, she’ll be there after them
• Prioritizing kids deprioritizes marriage and in turn, your wife
• No one wants a marriage that’s “friends sleeping together”
• Strong marriages are role models for kids

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Leadership – the ability of an individual or a group of individuals to influence and guide followers or other members of an organization.

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad sit down with Ian Roth to discuss his upcoming book, Big Stick Leadership.

The title of the book stems from Theodore Roosevelt’s mantra of big stick diplomacy: “Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.” Teddy Roosevelt was one of the greatest leaders in American history, and the principles he applied to his leadership are just as applicable today as they were at the turn of the 20th century.

Being a leader is something all men face. Whether that’s professionally or personally, becoming an effective leader is something at the forefront of many men’s lives. However, we are surrounded by examples of men who either speak loudly and carry a small stick or speak softly and carry a small stick.

Many men have poor examples of leadership in their lives and can see first-hand the destruction left in the wake of poor leadership. However, men can develop into great leaders, and this conversation focuses on where to start.

The guys and Ian dive into the attributes and characteristics of what a big stick leader looks like (and doesn’t look like) while sharing examples throughout the conversation. This conversation also segues into Ian’s book, his reverence for Teddy Roosevelt, and his ahead-of-its-time philosophies.

As this is Ian’s first foray into writing a book, men have a very unique opportunity to not only get early access to excerpts of his book but can also contribute to its writing. Check it out at https://ianmroth.com/ and subscribe to his Substack, where he is regularly posting progress updates: https://bigstickleader.substack.com/.

Contact Ian Roth

• Instagram
• Twitter

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Brotherhood – an association, society, or community of people linked by a common interest, religion, or trade

There is incredible power in forming a band of brothers, specifically a group of men, who can hold each other to a higher standard. In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad sit down and talk about the power of building a band of brothers.   

A band of brothers is different than a group of buddies.  While having friends and buddies is important and vital to a man, men need a group that goes beyond that. 

A band of brothers is a group of men who can challenge each other, push each other, and hold each other accountable.  It’s a group of men who are in the trenches of life together. They are unafraid to call another man out and help him get back on track.  This group of men will not simply tell you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear.

Many men have been deceived into thinking that the quintessential man is a lone wolf who is out there doing it on his own.  No man is meant to go through life without other men by his side. A lone wolf simply cannot fulfill his potential as a man. 

The guys share their experiences of learning to build their band of brothers. They discuss the benefits of having a band of brothers and how it’s directly impacted their lives.  Specifically how having a band of brothers helped them face down challenges and adversity, growth opportunities, and various life events.  We, as men, were not created to go through life alone without the brotherhood of other men.

The guys also provide some tips and guidance on how you can set out to build a band of brothers.  Too many men don’t have established relationships with other men or rely on their significant other to fill this gap.  It’s imperative that a man foster these relationships with other men. There are different ways to set out on building that.  Whether that’s with a group of friends, a church group, or at work, there are men out there for you to build a bond, a brotherhood, with.  You just need to look and be unafraid to ask.

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Suffer – experience or be subjected to something bad or unpleasant

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad have the opportunity to sit down with our friend, world-class professional strongman, bodybuilder, and fitness coach Anthony Diehl. 

Anthony shares the incredible journey that took him from working in corporate America to being able to build a successful coaching business. Oh, and he also conquered the strongman world!  He finishes by talking about his pivot into bodybuilding and how he’s focused on providing incredible resources to other coaches.

What sets a man apart is a willingness to suffer.  Take risks.  Be ok failing.  Anthony discusses the trajectory of his life and how it took a powerful turn simply because he was willing to take risks and potentially fail.  He, like many of us, was presented with some pivotal moments in his life to take a chance. Ultimately he chose to take them. 

Anthony leveraged the foundation he had set for himself in his professional career to create a thriving business, and he shares some tips and advice he learned along the way.  He also discusses some of the other projects and companies he’s working with and how he refuses to settle, simply because he is willing to suffer.

Anthony is the self-proclaimed World’s Strongest Nutrition Coach. He has helped hundreds of men and women transform their lives through fitness and nutrition.  If you are interested in his coaching or want a great, inspirational, no-holds-barred follow, you can check him out on Instagram (link below).  Also, support him and his friends at Hunt Lift Eat on Instagram at @huntlifteatofficial, or check out their website at https://www.huntlifteat.com.

Contact Anthony Diehl

• Instagram
• Twitter
• Anthony’s LinkTree

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Service – the action of helping or doing work for someone

On this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad have the honor of sitting down with our friend David Body of Operation Restored Warrior. David shares his story, including how we all met, then dives into the incredible work that Operation Restored Warrior does.

So many veterans have been impacted by their decision to serve their country. They consider it an honor to serve this great nation, but many of them return home broken. That brokenness continues to follow them throughout their lives. Each day, twenty-two veterans commit suicide, in so many ways because they have lost their way. Operation Restored Warrior is a non-profit, nondenominational Christian organization whose purpose is to help these warriors restore themselves through the healing of Jesus.

Operation Restored Warrior hosts 5-day Drop Zones at various locations across the US where the primary focus is on healing a man’s heart. The goal is for veterans to find inspiration and renewed vision to help them take on the challenges that have held them back. David goes into depth on the renewal that these men experience after these events and their renewed focus on helping rescue other veteran warriors.

If you know any former service members or law enforcement officers that are struggling, encourage them to check out Operation Restored Warrior at the links provided below.

Contact ORW

• Link Tree
• Instagram
• Facebook
• Email

Contact David Body

• Instagram

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Debt – an obligation that requires one party, the debtor, to pay money or other agreed-upon value to another party, the creditor.

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad dive into the concept of Financial Freedom.  There are a million different types of advice surrounding debt elimination and investing, but regardless of whose advice speaks to you, the fact of the matter is that a man mired in debt is shackled by it.

The guys spend some time going over some of their experiences around debt, including near bankruptcy, and how simply making the effort to address that has changed their lives.  That effort includes not only eliminating debt but making a conscious effort to save and invest.  Once you have established financial freedom, opportunities open, and your life will change.  If you are unsure of where to begin, start with tracking.  Once you track your income and expenses, you can devise a plan to conquer your finances and change your life.

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Self-Investment – the ability to invest your energy, time, and perhaps some money into enhancing, nurturing, and growing your mindset.

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad explore why it’s so critical that a man invests in himself. It’s a misnomer that investing in one’s self is solely financial, and the guys spend a lot of time discussing various ways they have invested in themselves and the incredible growth and development that has come from that effort.

Men often don’t believe in themselves enough to invest in themselves. That sort of self-talk needs to stop. Taking the time to invest in yourself can start small, but much like investing in the stock market, those small steps, when repeated consistently, will produce incredible results. Investing in yourself requires sacrifice, but that sacrifice is necessary. No good thing in life comes without sacrifice or work. Starting to invest in yourself today will set you up for unbelievable success.

These are some of the questions/topics that the guys address in this episode:

• Why should a man invest in himself?
• Why investing in yourself doesn’t require money.
• Why making sacrifices to invest in yourself is worthwhile
• How you can start investing in yourself TODAY

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Excuse - a reason or explanation put forward to defend or justify a fault or offense.

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad explore why men have been so good at making excuses. Excuses have plagued every man at one point or another. However, learning to stop making excuses will change your life. They discuss examples of learning to push past the allure of making excuses and provide some actionable steps that will help you overcome the desire to make excuses. 

Men are guilty of saying things such as "I don't have time" or "I can't do it." Why does a man tell himself this narrative and allow himself to spiral? Lives with unlimited potential can be derailed by something as simple as an excuse. Pushing past the desire to make excuses makes a man stronger and more resilient. Embracing the struggle enables a man to prioritize and execute. Ultimately, choosing to no longer make excuses will bring you closer to fulfilling your potential as a man, a husband, and a father. 

These are some of the questions/topics the guys address in this episode: 

• What is an excuse?
• Why do we make excuses?
• Identifying where you are failing.
• What do you need to shed to get things done?
• Creating a routine will help you stop making excuses.

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Service - the action of helping or doing work for someone.

In this episode of Untaming Masculinity, Dan and Brad explore service.  What does it mean to serve?  How does performing service benefit a man and help him become masculine?  Why serving others is the key to a purpose-driven life?  They discuss some stories of service in their lives and reflect on how others serving them set a foundation for the kinds of men they've become.

Learning to serve others not only enriches your life, but it brings power and purpose.  Choosing a life of service will bring you closer to God and will establish a foundation that comprehensively helps you be better.  Some questions answered in this episode are:

• Why should a man serve others?
• How does service enrich a man and make him more masculine?
• How can I begin serving others?

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