Untitled Beatles Podcast

Webster’s dictionary defines “music” as… you know what, only d-bags start a sentence with that nonsense. So let’s cut right to the chase—without The Beatles, is there even music? Extreme, maybe (#MoreThanWords), but the Fabs—together and solo—rewrote the rules of what popular music could be many times over, inspiring a term now commonly known as “Beatle-esque”.

But what does “Beatle-esque” even mean? Is it even a word if it isn’t in Websters? Does Emanuel Lewis know?

Tony and T.J. consider what the term means to them, providing examples of how elements of Beatles music have seeped into some of their favorite songs by other artists. Along the way, the Gab Two ponder:

🚽 Did nepotistic 80’s singer Rockwell record his lone hit in the same room where Elvis died?

🍔 Would you let your child near a McDonalds clown with a quarter pounder in his pants?

🎹 Did Billy Joel’s wonton cussing in “Laura” inspire Macca’s “Big Boys Bickering”?

We’re Beatles fans, sure—but we also understand that some artists, namely Asia, Stephanie Mills and Joe Diffie, were better and bigger than The Beatles. So they get their due, too.

EPISODE LINKS:

- Send us your favorite "Beatle-esque" tracks! Shout on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or NOW ON DISCORD!

- Don't leave us hanging. Don't bring us down the way United Artists left E.L.O. out in the cold and off the charts. Be sure to subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen!

🎸 BOINNNNNNG

Arguably the most recognizable chord in the history of rock and roll, the opening G7add9sus4 lets you know INSTANTLY that it’s been a hard day’s night, and George Martin’s been working like a dog.

This week, T.J. and Tony dish deep on the United Artists LP of the Original Motion Picture Sound Track to The Beatles’ “A Hard Day’s Night.” Our dynamic duo gets duophonic, breaking things down track-by-track, including all the classic George Martin instrumentals.

Between tracks, we make time for the important stuff, like:

🐈 A preview of the first known copy of the long-rumored Asia / Alf collab

🍗 Which was more commercially viable: Kenny Rogers’s records for United Artists, or his roasted chicken?

🕵🏻‍♂️ T.J.’s audition for Beatle Forensics, his spinoff podcast inspecting every version of I’ll Cry Instead ever recorded

🏴‍☠️ And Tony’s audition for Is Joe English Dead, his spinoff podcast about dubious Google results and internet polls

This one’s not streamable, kids, so you’ll have to hit the record store crates for your copy, or send a self-addressed stamped envelope to:

T.J. Shanoff

And by Chicago, he probably means Deerfield.

EPISODE LINKS:

- Should next year’s Fifth Beatle Bracket include Dave Brubeck? YOU DECIDE. Come yell at us on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or NOW ON DISCORD!

- Help us climb the charts! Please be sure to subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen!

It's been a long time

 🎰 Tony's recent pilgrimage to Vegas to see Cirque du Soleil's LOVE

 🐭 This wild Dick Clark pitch to have the Beatles take over Disneyland that's been going around the internet

 🍳 The (Pete) Best of Terri Hemmert's Breakfast with the Beatles this week

 🗣 All the great, real-time comments and questions from the audience

 🃏 And whatever else we have time for!

In honour of spring break, it’s a super deluxe reissue of the Untitled Beatles Podcast’s third episode. Travel back to the simpler times of 2020, a world under lockdown during a deadly global pandemic, when two old friends/comedy nerds try podcasting about their favorite band on a platform called Zoom. Spoiler: the band is The Beatles. Wax nostalgic about scrubbing your vegetables with soap while reliving the golden days of Covid-19 with all the bells and whistles you’ve come to expect from today’s Tangential Twosome.

Originally published June 13, 2020

Cue the synth brass and Yamaha DX7, it’s The Final Countdown to One Shining Moment; two songs definitely not written by John Tesh. Or were they?

EPISODE LINKS

• Come chat with us on our new Discord server! (Huge thanks to @wetmedia and @oathkeeperroxas for starting the party!)

There are a few unreleased tracks that most serious fans of rock’s 2nd greatest band (#1 is probably Asia, but only time will tell) have clamored to hear for years: Pete Best’s lost solo verse on “Free As a Bird”, “Flying” - sung in Yiddish, and the 26 minute “Sgt. Pepper’s Inner Groove” come to mind. And yet, no unreleased Beatles track has become the stuff of legend quite like "Carnival of Light". Mark Lewishon has “allegedly” heard it - if you believe the LIBEATLERAL MEDIA, that is - but few others have.

UNTIL NOW. THAT’S RIGHT. ALL F**KING CAPS, PAL.

Thanks to a secret source that (spoilers!) may or may not be the ghost of Dave Dexter, the Untitled Beatles Podcast has unearthed a never-before-released snippet of "Carnival Of Light". Download and share with your friends, because this one’s a stunner. Better than “Revolution #9”, and yet not quite as daring as “12 Bar Original”, it’s absolutely worth hearing, and will make a fine addition to “Anthology” when it’s re-released in 2095. You don’t need to be from Barcelona or know the weirdly paced duet of the same name from Sondheim’s “Company” to geek out over this massive Beatles moment.

As Sir Paul and/or Bill Withers might have said, It’s your Carnival (Of Light), it’s a lovely day!

What’s more exciting than March Madness? March Fabness, of course! You don’t need to be Jay Bilas (or South Pacific’s Luther Billis - #RayWalston) to play along with Tony, T.J., and Producer Casey, as they dramatically determine the 2022 Fifth Beatle Champion! Also, if your whole office isn’t playing along with us, they have failed and you should quit your jobs immediately. Seriously, where are your priorities?

Round one is filled with stunning, Cinderella-story upsets on the road to the title, and along the way, Beatleworld’s Jim Pantz (#HelloFriends) and Steve Weirdo debate:

📻 Was Marsha Albert her generation’s Marcia Raubach? Related: who the f are these people?

🤮 What’s more offensive: the original “Yesterday…and Today” cover, or the limited, U.S. “Two Virgins” cover with nude Dave Dexter?

 𝄢 If Stuart Sutcliffe had only lived to meet Meghan Trainor, would he be more or less about that bass?

Download your bracket here and play along! Play with us, or play with yourself! The UBP doesn’t believe in the whole “you’ll go to hell if you do” thing; hell is a construct made up to keep people in line in lieu of developing one’s own moral compass and you know what this isn’t the time or place for this we’ll do our religion episode in 2038.

March means one thing: SPORTSBALL. Or, two things: SPORTSBALL AND OFFICE GAMBLING.

But for those of us with (at best) a passing interest in sportsball, how are we supposed to get on the fun?

Fear not, fellow Fab Five aficionados! This year, the Untitled Beatles Podcast puts our brackets to better use: to finally crown THE FIFTH BEATLE.

DOWNLOAD YOUR OFFICIAL 2022 FIFTH BEATLE BRACKET HERE.

Tell your friends! Maybe start your own pool, make it interesting. We hear that some of the more reputable Vegas establishments have Magic Alex at 2000-to-1.

And stay tuned for the real action over our next two episodes, as our field of 32 contenders duke it out—once and for all—for the title of Fifth Beatle.

🏀 Who'd we miss? Who's in your Elite Eight (Days a Week) and your Final Four (the Benefit of Mr. Kite)? Come talk trash with us over on Facebook.

The Untitled Beatles Podcast’s all-time favorite “Sanford & Son” character was, obviously, Grady. So, shake it up Grady now (shake it up Grady), and join us for this deluxe, remixed, world podcast premiere of “Twitch & Shout”, the Untitled Beatles Podcast’s foray into live video on www.twitch.tv/Chicago4Real.

In this episode, we’re joined by longtime, renowned Second City producer Kelly Leonard, a fellow Beatle-nerd—and host of the "Getting to Yes, And" podcast—who shares his thoughts on “Get Back”, and more, including:

 🐶 Is Kelly’s dog’s part of an unusually vacuous conspiracy cabal?

 ✈️ (Please read in an incensed, drunk Chicago voice) How come “Jet” has TWO b-sides, ya jagbag?

 🏀🎙😴 Is WGN AM 720, your home of Northwestern Mens Basketbazzzzzzzzzzz sorry fell asleep there for a second responsible for the biggest mashup hit single of all time?

EPISODE LINKS

• Prefer your videos in video format? Find the original video edition of our conversation, and check out Roy Leonard's interview with Paul on YouTube.

"Seinfeld" is one of those shows that, strangely, never caught on. Nobody’s seen it and fewer remember it. Anyway, it was a show about nothing, and so is this week’s Untitled Beatles Podcast. While working like mad in their day/night/both jobs, The Gab Two didn’t have the requisite time to do their usual, vigorous, often dangerous show prep. But they let it roll, Bob, and the result is a wild #banger, including fierce debates about:

 🧤 Who would you rather step out with, John Lennon or Joe Jackson? (As in the British new-wave pianist, not Jacko’s dad. Jacko as in Michael Jackson, not Jocko, as in Jocko Marcellino, Sha Na Na’s drummer.)

 🎷 Is Clarence Clemmons his generation’s Clarence Carter?

 🌭 What kind of a jag bag doesn’t put grilled onions and mustard on their Polish sausage?As Phil Collins sang in 1982, “You can’t Murray Head”.

So grab a cold one (as in drink, not a person who’s been dead for a while), snuggle up with your favorite koala-type bear, put on a puffy shirt, giddy up, yada, yada, yada, and insert your own “Seinfeld” reference here.

EPISODE LINKS

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