We try to do the grown-up referee chat and still end up saying John Brooks had an absolute mare, even while admitting Spurs deserved the two reds. Then we get into why this Premier League season feels properly weird, why Villa have to be taken seriously in the title race, and why West Ham look like they’re sleepwalking into a relegation scrap. There’s also a bit on Dele Alli and how quickly it can all unravel, plus a proper chat about matchgoing fans versus global fans and why it does not have to be one or the other. We round it off with festive comments, Celtic’s magnet-gate, and Dan taking his six-year-old to Leeds away for a 4-1, which is either elite parenting or a safeguarding issue.

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