Vital Evolution

Today we have a remarkable story of HOPE! Elizebeth was born in the Amish community, and she shares her journey of leaving her family and friends behind. You do not want to miss this! Everyone can identify with a part of her story, even if you didn't grow up Amish. 

This is the third podcast (Be Your Comeback) to help keep you moving toward your new life… Last episode Productivity…this episode….you need energy to get you to that new life. Today we will look at what I mean by that. 

·        Last episode I mentioned how energy comes from consumption. 

o   Mind – create the environment in your mind that allows you to be who you want to be. (Dr. Bruce Lipton: took genetically identical stem cells and put them in three different culture medium Petrie dishes: muscles cells, bone, fat cells. 

o   Body – what would someone who is _____ do with their body to get them to who they want to be?

o   Spirit – silence and solitude. Meditation. Prayer. Contemplation. (Reflection) 

o   Relationships – enhance your journey or distract you. Create a group that is moving towards a common goal. 

o   Nature (added this one to the list) – sun, trees, rivers/lakes, clean air 

·        Energy drainers:

o   Stress - 

o   Sympathy - 

o   Attention given to things that don’t matter

·        How is this different than all the other people discussing changing your life? You are focused on the journey and creating a new you from the inside out. 

·        Podcast different from LLT…structure. 

 How does you energy consumption help you LEAD Lucky? You are in control of your internal environment and as the leader you create the environment for the team…

 Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

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youtube.com/@liveluckytherapy

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent

Last episode we discussed Being Your Comeback. I thought this might be helpful to keep you going on your 7-day commitment to a new life. 

·        Productivity starts with planning. Set aside time to plan each day/week. Once written, don’t have to focus on it in your brain. You won’t forget it.

·        Bite-size. Easy to get overwhelmed with a giant to-do list.

·        One thing at a time.

·        Identify barriers. Often we only focus on what we will do vs what we need to 

·        Maintenance is easier than dealing with a pile. Create a system that helps YOU (grocery list)

·        Routine. If you don’t like routine, reflect on what is driving that dislike…usually a fear (failure, be like so-and-so, etc.). 

·        We don’t often need as much motivation if there is a routine.

·        Consumption – how are you feeding your mind-body-spirit-relationships? Energy comes from those areas. 

·        Let your identity guide you. Not whether or not you completed something or how perfect you completed it.

·        15 minute podcast can’t hit every area of motivation and productivity, but if you can take one thing away to help you in your 7-day challenge then that to me is worth it.

 How do these tips help you LEAD Lucky? leaders can be more overwhelmed than the team…take even one nugget away. Or you can invite your team into them…

 Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

youtube.com/@liveluckytherapy

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent

I talk to people all the time that just need an excuse to try again (marriage, addiction, health issues…life.) “I’ve tried so many times, and it didn’t work.” “Why bother.” “No one else cares so why should I” IF you are nodding your head to these statements, then today’s episode is for you. Today’s episode is for the person who feels like a failure, the black sheep, the person caught in the cycle of mistake-guilt-shame/blame-repeat…

·        It is time to start your comeback! Today is that day!

·        Need momentum. Energy.

·        Reason. (You are not a Failure.)

·        Target. (if I don’t aim high I can’t miss….fear of failure)

·        Plan. (you may hate plans…fear of failure)

·        Guide (find someone you trust who has been down the path)

·        Accountability. (Fear of failure)

·        Seven days. Turn into two weeks. Turn into a month. Turn into a changed life. 

 Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

youtube.com/@liveluckytherapy

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent

Psychology Today December 2022: The Words We Speak. 

·        7% of communication is through words. 

·        However, words can be helpful in understanding ourselves and others. 

·        Me to We – tells how we think about our relationship (team or Us vs Them)

·        We talk a lot about I AM statements…”Self-focus, as it happens, is not the same thing as self-importance.” 

·        When is using “I” pronouns helpful and not helpful

o   Identity, truthfulness. Liars tend to avoid “I”

o   Become so focused on I, we Fear we are not a part of something. Depression. Anxiety. 

·        Forensics: we focus on what helps you, but this also helps us understand others, however, we still need to be curious…

How does understanding words help you LEAD Lucky? Leaders need to communicate that wee are the team. Not “I” 

Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

youtube.com/@liveluckytherapy

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent

In a counseling session the other day, we got on the topic of what it means to stand up for yourself. 

·        In our younger years, standing up for yourself is a physical fight. Some continue this strategy. 

o   Ex. Are you going to let them push you around? 

o   In child therapy, we talk about keeping it safe (always being attacked). Voice is the greatest weapon. 

·        What does standing up for yourself mean as you mature? 

o   Passive (like I was) versus Aggressive

§  This is an Us vs Them mentality

·        Ego – prove who I AM or more often, who I AM Not

·        If you really knew who you were then there is nothing to prove to yourself.

·        What is a different strategy that takes us away from Us vs Them (Fear)?

o   Assertiveness and interdependence

o   Looks like knowing ourselves enough to go beyond fearing who we are not.

o   Ex. Identity (vs role confusion) (Erik Erickson)  

·        When I know who I am, I can see others for who they are and I don’t have to take responsibility for them or their accusations of “who I AM not.” It allows you to love them and not fear them. 

 How does assertiveness help you LEAD Lucky? you can see beyond the strategies people use because you know who you are. Ex. Your team member verbally attacks you. You can see what is true and what is really about them fearing that they are not. 

 Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

youtube.com/@liveluckytherapy

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent 

Today we get to hear Carol's journey through many common challenges we all face including physical pain, depressoin, anxiety, and relationship struggles. She is a beacon of hope for those wading through these unpleasant terrains of life. 

Watching Supernatural (CW Season 3). 7 Deadly Sins.

·        Perhaps a new way of viewing behaviors or “sins.” (pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath, sloth)

·        Behaviorism posits that our behaviors identify us. Ex. “good/bad” behaviors = “Good/bad” person. B/W view

·        Most view sins as bad/evil or unwanted behaviors. Is killing a sin? Could be an accident. What about war or protecting your family? The ethical dilemma of killing one to save a billion? 

·        So easy to label others based on behavior because we cannot see their intangible motivation. 

·        Medieval Catholic Church Cardinal Sins: Different way to view 7 deadly sins: 

o   Pride: basing identity on behavior. Needing to prove Self-worth through behaviors. (vs Confident)

o   Greed: basing identity on financial status. Needing to prove self-worth thru money. (vs Wealthy)

o   Lust: basing identity on how we feel and an unhealthy strategy for dealing with emotions (boredom, anxiety, loneliness, disappointment). 

o   Envy: basing identity on status via comparing. Needing to prove self-worth by being better than someone else (vs 

o   Gluttony: Extreme scarcity and unhealthy strategy for dealing with emotions (boredom, anxiety, loneliness, disappointment). (moderation)

o   Wrath: Basing identity on what has been done to you by others. Unforgiveness. 

o   Sloth: Extreme fear…paralyzing. 

·        Not perfect. Trying to show that the importance is the motivation underlying the behavior. 

 How does identity help you LEAD Lucky? behaviors don’t define us. Start with curiosity…

 Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

youtube.com/@liveluckytherapy

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent

I was toggling between discussing leadership and parenting…so I decided I will do both! 

·        Many types of leadership styles. Indeed has 10 (Coach, Visionary, Servant, Autocratic, Laissez-faire, Democratic, Pace Setter, Transformational, Transactional, Bureaucratic). I’m not hear to tell you which style is better than the rest because just like everything in life, flexibility often leads to the greatest outcomes, not rigidity. So knowing a little about each of them and using them intentionally can be your best strategy. However, you will gravitate toward certain ones the majority of the time in part because of your personality and also because of the industry in which you lead. However, love, acceptance, and safety always play a factor.

o   In the LLT program, I tend to use coaching, visionary, servant, and democratic. These all help with building relationships, empowering the team, and in my experience, create bonds that last beyond any conflicts. Meaning, we can disagree and hash it out. At the end of the day, we still have each other’s backs.

o    How does all of this play into parenting? Often our leadership style at work is what we then use as our parenting style at home. This isn’t much different than when we use outdated strategies from our youth to try and solve our adult problems. We need to be flexible, learn, and grow to meet the demands of the present situation.

o   Ex. The old adage of using a hammer is great when you are dealing with nails, but not so great when you are dealing with lightbulbs.

·        At work you create a vision for what you want to see happening and you plan how you will get there. Home should be no different! You definition of success will help you determine the answers to these two different situations.

o   Success at work hopefully looks different than success at home. Think about what you needed as a child (love, acceptance, and safety). There were many other skills your parents may have taught you, but these were the most important…and they lead to more confident, contributing adults.

·        Bottom line: communicating loving acceptance and building trust in your child by keeping it safe will always give you a return on your investment. Circle of Security Model: Bigger, stronger, wiser, and kind. This strategy is one to incorporate at work too. YOU ARE THE TEAM!!

Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAMLVaEJBDhT-_3Qe9hrTgw

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent

So you have a vision for the future…how you want things to change…

·        BT – Focuses on what you DO

·        CBT – Focuses on what you THINK

·        LLT – Focuses on WHO YOU ARE

·        Identity – how you identify. Biggest misconception of identity is believing it is an action or a role.

o   Ex. (action) – singing, teaching, 

o   Ex (role) – Dad, husband, therapist

·        I AM NOT – Avoidance and Control (Leading with Fear and Scarcity)

o   Ex – I fear that I AM not lovable. What do you do? Smoother, push-people away or push-pull

·        I AM – ability to Love, Accept, and Trust (Ability to connect head and heart)

o   Ex – I AM loving. 

·        Is today the day you need to take the leap of faith…into your new dream? IT is a great day for a fly! IF you need a guide, LLT is an option too…

·        Whatever you do, don’t sit still today. Give yourself a reason to believe your I AM today.

 How does identity help you LEAD Lucky? Helps you to cut through the weeds. IT gives you the ability to zoom in and zoom out. I’m not suggesting your way or the highway because that doesn’t build trust. But it helps you see clearly when to stand up, when to listen, and when to collaborate, or when to say goodbye. 

 Closing: What is one thing you will take away from the episode today? What will you do? 

 Remember: Living Lucky is not living alone…if this helped you, share it. The links are in the notes… Follow us to know when the next episode is available. Please rate the podcast. Live Lucky Therapy is available. My book and workbook are on amazon. Please rate those as well! I appreciate being with you today, and I look forward to discussing Living Lucky more next time.

 For those of you who have listened this far and do want to take your dive deeper, email me at [email protected], reference this episode, and I will give you a special $10 off the cost of LLT each month for the entire 12-program.  

www.live-lucky.com

www.liveluckytherapy.com

https://www.facebook.com/LiveLuckyTherapy

https://www.twitter.com/blakesuzelis

https://www.instagram.com/liveluckytherapy

https://www.linkedin.com/in/blake-suzelis-2a741015/

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAMLVaEJBDhT-_3Qe9hrTgw

The Gift of Luck book and workbook:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=blake+suzelis&crid=2MJ1CH6TNASTC&sprefix=%2Caps%2C183&ref=nb_sb_ss_recent_1_0_recent