We're Not Fine

In the first half of this amazing LIVE recorded episode, Doug and Dr Talia dive into Rhianna’s personal story of battling excruciating and debilitating back pain at the age of 25. She shares with us how her unexplainable chronic pain affected her mental health and her romantic, family and friend relationships, as well as how she advocated for herself in the health care system. In the second half, dropping next week, we ask Rhianna how the trauma and grief associated with her chronic pain might still be affecting her, and she shares with us the professional knowledge she has gained from both her pain journey and her education. She teaches us about Somatic yoga therapy, and gives us tips, tricks & strategies live a more pain-free life.

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We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this mailbag, Doug and Dr Talia respond to our listener “Giuseppe”, who is in love with his girlfriend and wants desperately to be supportive of her, but can’t help but notice that she has conflict with so many people in her life. She insists she is not the problem. People either can’t stand her, or have cut her off and she will tell me that she has spent years putting up with their behavior and has finally created boundaries for herself and will no longer accept their disrespect. Who do I believe? How do I support her if I don’t like the drama that follows her everywhere? Help!

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

For the third Halloween in a row, our favorite Mystic, Medium, Psychic and Healer Kaya Jelani returns to answer all of our questions! How can we tell the difference between intuition and our own anxiety? How do we know if something isn’t a hell yes and then what do we do about it? How do we know when it’s time to leave a relationship? How do we tune into alignment and misalignment? Can you read someone’s aura? How do you tell your partner they need to evolve or evacuate?

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this mail bag episode, Dr. Talia and Doug respond to a self-conscious 31 year old man who says that his fiancé is way out of his league, like traffic accident causing and heart stoppingly beautiful. He says he’s just an average guy, and was mostly feeling comfortable until the barrage of questions and criticism from her friends and family started and never stopped. They can not understand why she would be with him when she could do so much better. Needless to say, this poor couple is suffering from a bad case of self doubt that is like a crack in the pavement, as it will keep growing under any further stress. Are they doomed?

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

Nothing makes our intentions to grow and change, to start a good habit, stop a bad one, feel more poignant and urgent than sitting at the bedside of the dying. We think we have problems? We probably don't even notice the petty things we complain about, the ways we feel sorry for ourselves, or the things we take for granted. In this live recorded episode, Dr Talia and Doug have the honor of speaking with Kelly Grosklags, LICSW, Grief Therapist, Podcaster (See My Grief) and author of "A Comforted Heart" and "When Love Meets Grief" about her 30 years of experience sitting with the dying and their families. We ask her what she has found are the most common themes of what we should not spend another second worrying about, we dive into peoples' near-death experiences and related epiphanies, why some find comfort in religion and spirituality, how to be a compassionate witness and support person for the dying and their family, and differentiate between grief and depression. It was an incredible episode if we may say so ourselves!

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this final sixth of a six part mini-sode series “How to Love Better”, Doug and Dr Talia discuss how to apologize so well, you will not need to continue apologizing. In order to resolve conflicts in relationships, we encourage you to use 'I feel' statements and take responsibility for your behavior and its impact on others. Easier said than done. Sincere apologies are those that acknowledge the other person's experience and commit to making changes. To be heard is to be healed, and apologies without behavior change are just manipulation. BAM.

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this fifth of a six part mini-sode series “How to Love Better”, Doug and Dr Talia discuss how to disappointment-proof yourself and accept the truth that your needs are not as obvious as you think they are. And your partner is not psychic, as much as you wish they were. And even though you might be better than your average bear at anticipating and fulfilling the needs of others, there are a host of reasons why your partner might not be beating you to the punch in meeting your needs. When you say “ I shouldn’t have to tell them” or “they should already know “, you are in fact setting yourself up for a world of resentment, frustration and disappointment. Doug and Dr. Talia are encouraging you to own your needs and lovingly make them clear, even if you have to repeat them. We are rooting for you!

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this fourth of a six part mini-sode series “How to Love Better”, Doug and Dr Talia offer their favorite and most used couples’ therapy nuggets of wisdom. This week we talk about “giving the benefit of the doubt” even if it’s hard. Yes Yes, the best predictor of future behavior might be past behavior, but giving the benefit of the doubt allows your relationship and your partner to grow. Don’t pigeon hole them and jump to dark conclusions, you will perpetuate a reactive relationship dynamic in which neither of you see each other accurately and with love. We hope you enjoy this mini-sode!

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this third of a six part mini-sode series “How to Love Better”, Doug and Dr Talia offer their favorite and most used couples’ therapy nuggets of wisdom. This week we talk about where each of us lies on the continuum of authenticity vs harmony in our love relationships. We tend to give our partner what we most desire. Those valuing “authenticity” (sometimes at the cost of harmony) feel most connected to their partner through honesty, sharing their thoughts, feelings, observations, and are more free to share constructive feedback and state their needs with their partners, hoping for a reciprocation in effort. On the other hand, those valuing “harmony” (also often at the cost of authenticity) value a general feeling of calm, ease, positivity, joy, and hope for a reciprocal “going with the flow for the greater good” in their interactions with their partner. Both ways of being in the world are often in reaction to family of origin patterns that we are either seeking to recreate, healthy or not, because the interactions feel like home to us, or to regulate our fried nervous systems, or hopefully to create a connection that feels healthier and stronger than the one we grew up in. Which is superior? A balance is what we seek, but what we do know is that you can have authenticity without harmony (not an enjoyable relationship perhaps), but you cannot have true harmony without authenticity. Enjoy!

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77

In this second of a six part mini-sode series “How to Love Better”, Doug and Dr Talia offer their favorite and most used couples’ therapy nuggets of wisdom. This week we urge you to stay in the discomfort of having a loving but tough conversation with your partner. “Don’t Drop the Rope” speaks to the idea that when our nervous system is short-circuiting in a trauma response; fight, flight or freeze, let’s try to stick with it if we can, or at least acknowledge their bid for partnership along with our need to calm down, and reassure our partner we will circle back to resolve it as soon as we are regulated.

We're Not Fine

https://werenotfine.com

Shop the Pod: https://werenotfine.com/shop

Instagram: @werenotfinepod

Doug Jensen

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: douglasljensen

Twitter: dougjensen4Cs

Dr. Talia Jackson

Profile: https://werenotfine.com/our-team/

Email: [email protected]

IG: @drtaliajackson

Twitter: @Talia.Jackson77