“Money doesn’t grow on trees! Pull my finger!” Some dad phrases are goofy. But others? They can be quite hurtful, even if we don’t mean for them to be. In this episode of the All Pro Dad Podcast, host Ted Lowe is joined by BJ Foster and Bobby Lewis to talk about common phrases we need to cut out.

Why This Matters
Words aren’t neutral with our kids. They are either helpful or hurtful.

Phrases That Make Kids Feel Small and Unheard

1. "Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about."
Instead, try: "It's okay to feel sad/frustrated/scared. Tell me what's going on." 

2. “What’s wrong with you?”
Instead, try: "That choice wasn't like you. Help me understand what happened. 

Phrases That Can Hurt Our Connection With Our Kids

3. "When I was your age…"
Instead, try: "You are growing up in a different world than I did.  Explain it to me like I’m a martian. 

4. “You are making me crazy.”
Instead, try: "I’m feeling really frustrated right now. I need a minute, and then we can talk about.” 

Phrases That Can Mess Up How Our Kids See Authority and Even God

5. "Because I said so."
Instead, try: "Focus on natural consequences and clear boundaries: "If you don't pick up your toys, they'll be put away for a week."

6. “I’m disappointed in you.”
Instead, try: "I'm disappointed with that choice you made, and I know you can do better."

Important Episode Timestamps 

00:00 – 02:36 | Dad Phrases We All Say
02:36 – 04:09 | Southern Sayings and Dad Humor
04:09 – 05:08 | The Big Question: What Should Dads Stop Saying?
05:08 – 08:52 | “Stop Crying or I’ll Give You Something to Cry About”
08:52 – 10:00 | “What’s Wrong with You?” and “What Were You Thinking?”
10:00 – 13:05 | “When I Was Your Age” and “You’re Making Me Crazy”
13:05 – 17:52 | “Because I Said So” and the Problem with Authority
17:52 – End | “I’m Disappointed in You” and the Weight of Words

APD Pro Move:
This week, before you correct, question, or even joke with your child, pause for just one second and ask yourself, 'Is what I'm about to say hurtful or helpful for my kid?

All Pro Dad Resources:

Episode 61 – What Prob

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Bobby Lewis on LinkedIn

BJ Foster on LinkedIn

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